When Intense Supports Are So Heavy, How Do You Not Sink?

Garbage Bags to Graduate School: From Invisible to Unstoppable

If foster care is supposed to make children feel safe, why do so many still feel unseen, unheard, as they’re shuffled from home to home? Beth LaFontaine knows that answer, not from theory, but from lived experience. She moved through 19 foster placements, carried her belongings in garbage bags, and learned early that survival often meant staying quiet, guarded, and unseen. But her story doesn’t stay there. In this conversation, Beth shares what it actually feels like inside the foster care system, the grief that follows you, the moments that shape you, and the people who can change everything simply by choosing to see you. “I wasn’t just a behavior. I was a child who needed to be understood.” “We don’t need better suitcases. We need better systems.” “There is so much grief, and not enough space to name it.” You’ll hear about the quiet power of one teacher who saw beyond the chaos, the long shadow of broken trust, and why so many well-intended systems miss what matters most. But this isn’t just a story about what’s broken. It’s about what’s possible. From high school dropout to licensed clinical social worker, from surviving the system to working to change it, Beth is now helping bring voices together, foster youth, caregivers, and professionals, to build something better. There’s honesty here. There’s hard truth. And there’s hope. Because being seen can change everything. Please visit https://FCGadvocacy.org [https://fcgadvocacy.org/] to learn more about the solutions we are working on! The Foster Care Collective is one of areas of focus and information will be updated on our homepage as we continue this important initiative. Also check out our stories of success and some of the ways we can help you move the needle on what matters most to you. Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/finding-common-ground--6199849/support [https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/finding-common-ground--6199849/support?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=rss]. Recorded at ROC Vox Recording & Production Studios in Rochester, NY. Learn more at rocvox.com [https://rocvox.com].

What does it really look like from inside the foster care system?

In this episode of Finding Common Ground, we take a deep dive into foster care with Genevieve Rose Traversy, a Foster Care Recruiter with Lutheran Services Carolinas. A third-generation foster child and teen mom, Genevieve could have repeated the cycle. She didn’t. We often celebrate when a child is removed from a dangerous home. But our attention can’t stop there, as if the solution is complete. As Genevieve shared, “We talk a lot about saving kids. We don’t always talk about what happens after.” For Genevieve, this isn’t theory. She lived it. “When you grow up in the system, you see the gaps differently, and you carry them with you.” Now she’s working inside the system that didn’t always meet her needs, using that perspective to create better outcomes for children today. Because “Lived experience doesn’t just give you a voice. It gives you a responsibility.” 📖 Read her story: Focus on the Family – Faces of Foster Care https://www.focusonthefamily.com/pro-life/faces-of-foster-care/ 🔗 Connect with Genevieve: TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@genevieverosetraversy Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/genevieverosetraversy LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/genevieve-traversy/ #FindingCommonGround, #PodcastWithPurpose, #ChangingTheWayAdvocacysDone, #EmpowermentAdvocacy, #UnfilteredConversations, #FocusedOnSolutions, #InviteTheElephantToDinner, #FosterCare, #FosterCareAwareness, #FosterCareSystem, #ChildWelfare, #ChildAdvocacy, #TraumaInformed, #TraumaInformedCare, #LivedExperience, #BreakTheCycle, #CycleBreaker, #VoicesThatMatter, #YouthInCare, #FormerFosterYouth, #FosterCareJourney, #SocialImpact, #AdvocateForChildren, #SupportFosterYouth Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/finding-common-ground--6199849/support [https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/finding-common-ground--6199849/support?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=rss]. Recorded at ROC Vox Recording & Production Studios in Rochester, NY. Learn more at rocvox.com [https://rocvox.com].

When Intense Supports Are So Heavy, How Do You Not Sink?

What happens when exhaustion turns into something darker than burnout, when a parent begins having thoughts they never imagined they’d think? In this raw, unflinching conversation with Jillian Eisloeffel, the mom behind Bobby’s World, we go beyond surface-level stories of resilience and into the reality most people never say out loud. Jillian shares what it’s like to raise a child with profound needs inside a system that was supposed to help, but instead leaves families isolated, misunderstood, and fighting to stay afloat. This episode strips away the platitudes and faces the truth of parenting in survival mode: The moments you feel yourself disappearing inside your own life The kind of exhaustion no amount of sleep fixes The silence that surrounds families when the system gets it wrong Even when you understand that behavior is information, someone still has to decode it. And more often than not, that someone is the parent, carrying it 24/7 while the system struggles to keep up. Through connection, honesty, and one mother’s refusal to keep pretending, Jillian found a path back, first to herself, then to others walking the same invisible line. Today, she’s helping lead the National Council on Severe Autism in New York State, giving voice to families who have been living this reality in the dark for far too long. This isn’t an episode about hope that glosses over pain. It’s about finding language for what you’ve been feeling, and realizing you are not alone. If you’ve ever sat in the quiet and wondered how much more you can carry, this conversation is where you’ll finally hear someone say it out loud. Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/finding-common-ground--6199849/support [https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/finding-common-ground--6199849/support?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=rss]. Recorded at ROC Vox Recording & Production Studios in Rochester, NY. Learn more at rocvox.com [https://rocvox.com].

The Housing Waiting List Trap: The Crisis Families are Living

What happens when your child needs lifelong support, but the “options” ahead are mostly waitlists, dead ends, and ideas that don’t really exist? In this episode of Finding Common Ground, we sit down with Wendy Ernzen, a Michigan mom, advocate, fundraiser, and fellow podcaster, for a conversation that so many families will feel in their bones. Wendy shares what it looked like when her family hit a breaking point, and how a system that should help too often only responds once families are already in crisis. One line from this episode says it all: “There should be real options that are presented to parents… not ideas, not options.” We talk about: - What families are actually told when school ends - Why housing and support often only open up after crisis - The invisible emotional load of planning for “after we’re gone” - How siblings, family homes, and creative support networks fit into the bigger picture - Why so many families are being forced to build the future themselves This episode is honest, validating, and uncomfortably real, especially for anyone quietly carrying the question: What will happen to my loved one if I can’t do this forever? There are no easy answers here, but there is truth, perspective, and the kind of conversation more families need to hear.  If this fear has ever lived in the back of your mind, this episode is for you. Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/finding-common-ground--6199849/support [https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/finding-common-ground--6199849/support?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=rss]. Recorded at ROC Vox Recording & Production Studios in Rochester, NY. Learn more at rocvox.com [https://rocvox.com].

Stuck and Spinning? Call the IDDO

When you know your child needs help, but every phone call leads to more confusion, where do you turn? In this DadAbility episode of Finding Common Ground, Steve sits down with Flor Ramirez, Supervising Attorney of New York’s Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities Ombuds Program (IDDO), to talk about a resource many families still do not know exists, and why it matters more than ever. Flor pulls back the curtain on what an ombudsman actually does: helping families navigate complicated disability systems, ask the right questions, and get unstuck when nothing seems to move forward. “We help you navigate a system that is meant to help you… even when it doesn’t feel that way.” As both a leader and a mom of a child with autism, Flor brings something rare to the table, professional expertise and lived experience. She shares how her team listens first, connects the dots, and is not afraid to push when something isn’t working. “We’re not afraid to knock on doors and say, ‘This isn’t right… can we fix it?’” Steve and Flor also dig into what families are really experiencing right now, the confusion, the delays, the missed connections, and why so much of it comes down to a system that is complex, not always clear. Together, they explore how better education, stronger collaboration, and honest feedback can start to shift that experience. This conversation is real, practical, and quietly powerful. It is for parents who are tired of hitting walls, tired of being told “no” without explanation, and ready to understand where help may actually begin. Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/finding-common-ground--6199849/support [https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/finding-common-ground--6199849/support?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=rss]. Recorded at ROC Vox Recording & Production Studios in Rochester, NY. Learn more at rocvox.com [https://rocvox.com].