The Myth of the Productive Woman: Why We Can't Have Nice Things

The Myth of the Productive Woman: Why We Can't Have Nice Things

What would you do if you had one hour of genuinely free, discretionary time?  Not a lunch break spent half-checking email. Not a bath interrupted by small humans asking for snacks. One hour that was actually, completely yours. If your thoughts immediately go to your to-do list... that's what this episode is about.  In the latest episode of Get a Life, host Jackie Oña Cascarano explores the science behind women's disproportionate experience of "time scarcity," how busyness became a cultural status symbol, and the hidden "productivity imperative" that keeps high-achieving women from truly thriving. This isn't about doing more with less (no thank you). It's about understanding our relationship with time and how it impacts our choices and our well-being. ---------- References: Belleza, S., Paharia, N., & Keinan, A. (2017). Conspicuous consumption of time: When busyness and lack of leisure time become a status symbol. Journal of Consumer Research, 44(1), 118–138. https://doi.org/10.1093/jcr/ucw076 [https://doi.org/10.1093/jcr/ucw076] Gender Equity Policy Institute. (2023). Time poverty and the gender gap in free time: An analysis of the 2022 American Time Use Survey. https://genderequitypolicyinstitute.org [https://genderequitypolicyinstitute.org/] Hochschild, A. R., & Machung, A. (1989). The second shift: Working parents and the revolution at home. Viking. Holmes, C. (2022). Happier Hour: How to beat distraction, expand your time, and focus on what matters most. Simon and Schuster.

What Makes a Life Rich? Shige Oishi on Life in Three Dimensions

You're not unhappy. You're not unfulfilled. But something is missing — and you can't quite name it.  In this episode of Get a Life, Jackie Oña Cascarano chats with Dr. Shigehiro Oishi, Marshall Field Professor of Psychology at the University of Chicago and author of Life in Three Dimensions. For decades, psychology has answered, "what makes a life good?" in two ways: a happy life or a meaningful one. But Professor Oishi has introduced a groundbreaking third dimension: psychological richness. A psychologically rich life is filled with variety, novelty, perspective-shifting experiences, and a full spectrum of emotions, from thrill and delight all the way to grief and fear. It's the dimension that captures adventure, curiosity, and openness — and it might be exactly what's missing for women in mid-life. THIS is the science behind Adventure Year. This episode is at the heart of everything Get a Life is about. Jackie and Shige cover what psychological richness actually is (and what happiness and meaning miss), the dark chocolate metaphor (so bitter, so sweet, so complex!), why you don't have to be naturally adventurous to cultivate it, what reading New York Times obituaries revealed about how people really live, and small everyday ways to start living more richly today.  References: Oishi, S., & Westgate, E. C. (2022). A psychologically rich life: Beyond happiness and meaning. Psychological Review, 129(4), 790–811. https://doi.org/10.1037/rev0000317 Oishi, S., Choi, H., Liu, A., & Kurtz, J. (2021). Experiences associated with psychological richness. European Journal of Personality, 35(5), 754–770. https://doi.org/10.1177/0890207020962334 Oishi, S., Choi, H., Koo, M., Galinha, I., Ishii, K., Komiya, A., Luhmann, M., Scollon, C., Shin, J., Lee, H., Suh, E. M., Vittersø, J., Heintzelman, S. J., Kushlev, K., Westgate, E. C., Buttrick, N., Tucker, J., Ebersole, C. R., Axt, J., Besser, L. L. (2020). Happiness, meaning, and psychological richness. Affective Science, 1(2), 107–115. https://doi.org/10.1007/s42761-020-00011-z

4,000 Mondays: Jodi Wellman on How to Be Astonishingly Alive

On this episode of Get a Life, Jackie Oña Cascarano chats with Jodi Wellman,  former corporate executive, popular TED speaker, and author of You Only Die Once: How to Make It to the End with No Regrets, about why remembering you're going to die might be the single most powerful tool you have for actually living. Jodi takes the ancient practice of memento mori and turns it into a refreshingly funny, practical framework for intentional living, and this conversation hits at the heart of what Get a Life is all about: exercising agency, being the main character in your own story, and rewriting what success actually means. Jackie and Jodi dig into the now-viral "Mondays left" calculation (Jackie has 1,882 — and yes, it changed her week), some gut-punch quotes from the likes of Ben Franklin and Hunter S. Thompson (a natural pairing), and why so many high-functioning women in mid-life are quietly living "half dead" inside lives that maybe look great on paper. They get into the tension every modern woman is navigating right now: the soft life, coziness, and boundaries movement versus the deliberate discomfort that builds mastery, vitality, and what Jodi calls being "astonishingly alive." They talk about temporal scarcity, the most common end-of-life regrets, the productivity trap that defines worth by output, and the sobering reality that 50% of us will die before 70 — so maybe waiting until retirement to start living isn't the move. Jodi also shares how the "4,000 Mondays" lens reshapes ambition for the high-achievers she coaches, and where to start this week if you feel stuck on autopilot but can't overhaul your life. Whether you're feeling numb, restless, or just ready to stop letting life happen to you, this conversation will leave you with a new way of looking at your calendar — and your one wild, finite life.

The Five Things You Need to Actually Thrive

In this episode of Get a Life, Jackie Oña Cascarano explores one of the most influential frameworks in positive psychology, the PERMA model of well-being, and how it can bring more vibrancy and richness to mid-life for high-achieving women looking to expand beyond productivity and caretaking. Martin Seligman's PERMA model outlines the five science-backed dimensions of human flourishing: Positive Emotion, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning, and Accomplishment. While many high-achieving, ambitious women have built lives rich in meaning and accomplishment through professional and caregiving roles,  other dimensions - like positive emotion, engagement, and connection - become neglected, causing life to feel flat or depleted despite outward success. Jackie shares how her Adventure Year, a personal commitment to intentionally pursuing hobbies, curiosity, and new experiences, is a real-time case study in mid-life flourishing. She walks through each dimension of PERMA and explores how small, intentional shifts can restore energy, deepen connection, and bring more texture, vitality and psychological richness to daily life. If you're a woman in mid-life looking for practical, science-based tools to thrive, not just achieve, this episode offers a grounded roadmap to flourishing.  References Csikszentmihalyi, M. (1990). Flow: The psychology of optimal experience. Harper & Row. Fredrickson, B. L. (2001). The role of positive emotions in positive psychology: The broaden-and-build theory of positive emotions. American Psychologist, 56(3), 218–226. https://doi.org/10.1037/0003-066X.56.3.218 [https://doi.org/10.1037/0003-066X.56.3.218] Oishi, S., & Westgate, E. C. (2022). A psychologically rich life: Beyond happiness and meaning. Psychological Review, 129(2), 263–281. https://doi.org/10.1037/rev0000317 [https://doi.org/10.1037/rev0000317] Seligman, M. E. P. (2011). Flourish: A visionary new understanding of happiness and well-being. Free Press.

Adventure Year: You Can’t Be an Interesting Person If You Don’t Do Interesting Things

In this episode of Get a Life, Jackie Oña Cascarano introduces Adventure Year: her personal experiment in building a more interesting life through hobbies, curiosity, and everyday adventures. After realizing that her life had become highly productive but not particularly interesting, Jackie began exploring a concept from positive psychology called psychological richness, a dimension of well-being characterized by novel and perspective-changing experiences. Many high-achieving women have lives rich in meaning and responsibility, but low in novelty and exploration. Adventure Year is Jackie’s commitment to intentionally bringing curiosity, creativity, and new experiences back into everyday life—from watercolor classes to learning Mahjong. This episode explores why hobbies and everyday adventures matter for well-being, how intrinsic motivation reconnects us to who we are, and why creating an interesting life might be one of the most powerful ways to flourish. SHOW NOTES After years spent in a season defined by productivity, caregiving, and responsibility, she realized that while her life was meaningful, it had become highly efficient but not very interesting. Drawing on research from positive psychology, Jackie introduces the concept of psychological richness—a dimension of well-being characterized by novel, surprising, and perspective-changing experiences. Many high-achieving women are rich in meaning through work, caregiving, and contribution, but may lack the novelty and curiosity that make life feel textured and memorable. Jackie shares how this realization led to her personal experiment called Adventure Year, an intentional commitment to pursue hobbies, creative pursuits, learning experiences, and everyday adventures. From watercolor classes to learning Mahjong, she explores how even small experiences outside our routines can reconnect us with curiosity, identity, and growth. References Holmes, C. (2022). Happier hour: How to beat distraction, expand your time, and focus on what matters most. Gallery Books. Oishi, S., & Westgate, E. C. (2022). A psychologically rich life: Beyond happiness and meaning. Psychological Review, 129(2), 263–281. https://doi.org/10.1037/rev0000317 [https://doi.org/10.1037/rev0000317] Ryan, R. M., & Deci, E. L. (2000). Intrinsic and extrinsic motivations: Classic definitions and new directions. Contemporary Educational Psychology, 25(1), 54–67. https://doi.org/10.1006/ceps.1999.1020 [https://doi.org/10.1006/ceps.1999.1020] Seligman, M. E. P. (2011). Flourish: A visionary new understanding of happiness and well-being. Free Press.