Grit & Grace — E5: The "I'm Fine" Lie — How We Stayed Invisible and Called It Survival

Title: Grit & Grace — Season 2 Intro: The Season of Healing

We're back. Season 1 was about survival — the internal fight, the six inches between our ears, the forever battle just to stay in the room. This season is something different. This is the season of healing. From the inside out. A lot happened during the time away. Sponsor changes. Step work. Life. The kind of stuff that reminds you why rigorous honesty isn't just a phrase — it's the only thing that keeps the wheels on. Neither of us disappeared. We just had to put the man before the mission for a while. Colton is five and a half months in. Matthew is closing in on nine. Neither of us has this figured out. We're just two guys who keep showing up — to the meetings, to the steps, to each other, and now back to the foxhole. This season the conversation shifts toward what healing actually looks like in practice. Learning to love the person you were so you can fully become the person you're becoming. Staying connected instead of isolating when the weight gets heavy. Hope over dope. Solution over problem. Service over self. The scars are still there. We're just not afraid of them anymore. Season 2 starts now. Drop a topic in the comments — tell us what you need to hear. We'll get into it. The foxhole is open. Come as you are. 🎙️

Grit & Grace — E8: Projecting — When the Problem You See In Everyone Else Is Actually You

Projection doesn't announce itself. It never says "I am afraid of this thing so I am going to put it on you." It just quietly rewrites the story until you genuinely believe the problem is out there — when the whole time it was in the six inches between your ears. Projection is just insecurity with an alibi. You take the thing you can't face about yourself and put it onto someone else so you don't have to look at it directly. In recovery it shows up constantly — and it's one of the hardest things to catch because by definition you can't see it clearly while you're doing it. This week the conversation gets into what that actually looks like from the inside. How many times in active addiction were we accusing people of things that were actually true about us? And how does that pattern show up now — even in sobriety — when the defenses are still running on autopilot? We're forever becoming. And we're a masterpiece in the making. The foxhole is open. Come as you are. 🎙️

Grit & Grace — E7: The Mental Obsession — When Your Brain Becomes the Enemy

A craving is a whisper. An obsession is a hostage situation. Most people in early recovery know what a craving feels like — that immediate pull, the thought that shows up uninvited and knocks on the door. What nobody warns you about is what happens when you don't answer that door and it kicks it in anyway. That's the obsession. That's the thing that moves in and runs the whole show from the moment you open your eyes to the moment you finally fall asleep — if you sleep at all. This week Colton and Matthew are joined by Chandler, and the three of them get into what that mental spiral actually looks like from the inside. The difference between "a drink sounds good" and "I cannot think about anything else." How fast one becomes the other. And why the obsession doesn't just live in substances — it lives in the pattern. Your brain is a lot better at lying to you than you think. This episode is about learning to recognize the lie before it becomes the plan. The foxhole is open. Come as you are. 🎙️

Grit & Grace — E6: Self-Love and Forgiveness — And Why One Can't Exist Without the Other

Self-love sounds simple until you've spent years being the one person you absolutely cannot forgive. This week the conversation goes somewhere most people avoid — the difference between guilt and shame, between a sentence you serve and a life sentence you hand yourself. The hardest part of getting sober isn't putting the bottle down. It's standing in the quiet afterward and realizing you still have to face the person you became. That's where self-love either starts or stalls. For the first time, the foxhole has a third voice. Anna joins the conversation — and what she brings to the table is the kind of honesty that only comes from someone who has actually been there. No performance. No polish. Just the truth about what it takes to stop being the worst thing you ever did. The work doesn't end when you get sober. In a lot of ways, that's when it starts. The foxhole is open. Come as you are. 🎙️

Grit & Grace — E5: The "I'm Fine" Lie — How We Stayed Invisible and Called It Survival

"I'm fine." It's not an answer. It's a door slam. Before the work, before the honesty, before any of this — "I'm fine" was the universal shutdown. The two words that ended every conversation that got too close. Nobody could help you if you were fine. Nobody could ask questions if you were fine. Nobody could see what was actually happening if you just kept saying you were fine. It wasn't a lie told to protect other people. It was armor. A way to stay invisible, stay in control, and never have to feel the discomfort of being actually known by another human being. This week the conversation gets into what that mask costs — and what it took to finally put it down. The foxhole is open. Come as you are. 🎙️