Hardwired to Belong: A Conversation on Betrayal, Presence, and Coming Home to Yourself with author Becky Moller

Hardwired to Belong: A Conversation on Betrayal, Presence, and Coming Home to Yourself with author Becky Moller

What happens when the person you trust most tells you a truth that breaks you wide open? For Becky Moller, that moment became the doorway into a whole new life. Becky joined us this week to talk about her journey from betrayal trauma into becoming a mindfulness teacher, author, and mentor. In 2014, her husband disclosed an online relationship connected to a pornography addiction he'd struggled with for years. Becky had always been the high functioning, juggle everything kind of person, and this was the moment she finally broke. What followed was a decade of healing that took her through twelve step recovery, meditation and yoga training, and eventually into building her own program, Undone Academy. We talked about what it actually means to heal in the body, not just the mind, why relationships can be some of the most powerful growth machines we have, and how Becky came to understand that the pain she carried was never really about her husband at all. It was about learning to fully love and accept every part of herself. OUR FAVORITE QUOTES "I went from being a high functioning, juggle all the balls kind of person, to I just couldn't function anymore." "What he did had exposed all of this pain that was already in me. The stuff I actually had to heal had very little to do with him at all." "Your deepest self knows how to heal. It already knows. Our job is just to get out of the way." "We are literally hardwired to belong to each other." "The pain you feel is our human inheritance. Just focus on your next right step, because that's how you find your way through." CHAPTER MARKERS 03:13 Becky's life now and how she got here 03:50 The disclosure that broke everything open 07:07 The pain was never really about him 13:16 Healing starts with creating space 17:09 The body as a portal into presence 23:56 Stepping into a frequency you didn't know existed 29:03 The book, the retreat, and the 60 day challenge 37:26 You are not alone YOUR TURN Where in your life are you trying to think your way through something that your body already knows how to heal? This week, notice what happens when you stop analyzing it and just ask yourself, can I be with this? CONNECT WITH BECKY Becky is opening up the 60 Day Mindful Summer Challenge starting June 1st. It's three daily commitments, nourish, move, and anchor, broken into eight modules of Body-Soul work you can do in small pieces each day. Register here: https://beckymoller.com/mindful-summer/ [https://beckymoller.com/mindful-summer/] If you're in a relationship that needs repair or a deeper level of connection, Becky is also hosting a Couples Retreat September 3rd through 6th in St George, Utah, built around the tools of embodied mindfulness. Register here: https://beckymoller.com/couples-retreat/ [https://beckymoller.com/couples-retreat/] Becky's book, Undone, Unafraid, walks through her own journey from rock bottom into wholeness. Find it here: https://www.amazon.com/Undone-Unafraid-Evolving-Betrayal-Femininity-ebook/dp/B0FZYSSNZM [https://www.amazon.com/Undone-Unafraid-Evolving-Betrayal-Femininity-ebook/dp/B0FZYSSNZM] If Becky's story resonates with you, reach out. Email her directly at becky@beckymoller.com or visit her at beckymoller.com. She also posts weekly teachings and mindfulness practices every Monday on her YouTube channel, The Undone Path with Becky Moller: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8wzQA5FDVaTYUPox_NACSA [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8wzQA5FDVaTYUPox_NACSA] ----- All Heart & Soul's Details: Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/] Join the mastermind program:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/heartsoul⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/heartsoul] Say hi to Mariah on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@mariahmckechnie Say hi to Monique on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@moniqueforcier Leave a review on the Apple Podcast app and the Spotify app: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ MB01ISWYGPQVZRF

What Your Bloodwork Isn't Telling You with Dafna Chazin

WHAT IF YOUR FOOD COULD ACTUALLY HEAL YOU? We talk a lot on this show about taking care of yourself from the inside out, and this episode? It hit different. Because our guest has been through it, and she turned that rock bottom into a career helping other women find their way back to their bodies. We sat down with Dafna Chazin, a registered dietitian with over 15 years of experience who now specializes in women's hormones, fertility, and PCOS. Her path wasn't some perfectly planned journey. She was dealing with painful periods, anxiety, acne, and digestive issues in her 20s and said she was, quote, "kind of a hot mess." It took her close to ten years to figure it out herself, and that's exactly why she does what she does now. So nobody else has to take that long. KEY THEMES + TAKEAWAYS Women are being gaslit by a healthcare system that wasn't built for them, and standard bloodwork doesn't tell the whole story The "normal" lab ranges were largely determined using data from men, and even then, sitting at the edges of "normal" can still mean something is off PCOS (now being called PMOS) affects both reproductive and metabolic health, including weight, insulin resistance, and cardiovascular risk Healing doesn't have to mean perfection. Dafna literally tells her clients when they're being too strict The GPS analogy: you don't have to start over every time you go off plan. You just recalculate Practical first steps don't require a total overhaul, just smarter, consistent habits Homemade food is almost always better for you than restaurant food, even without trying DAFNA'S TOP TIPS FOR HORMONAL HEALTH Don't skip meals. A consistent breakfast, lunch, dinner, and one or two snacks keeps blood sugar stable all day Start breakfast with 20 to 30 grams of protein. Eggs, Greek yogurt, cottage cheese, or a protein shake all count Choose high fiber carbs. Think beans, lentils, sweet potatoes, quinoa, chickpea pasta. These are what Dafna calls "steady carbs." Take a 10 to 15 minute walk after meals. Research shows short movement after eating lowers insulin better than one long gym session Get off screens two hours before bed. Blue light disrupts melatonin and wrecks sleep, especially for women in perimenopause OUR FAVORITE QUOTES "Once you learn how to eat, you're done. You can do this for the rest of your life." "I knew things about my body that I knew were not true, and I didn't want to rely on some dude in a white coat to tell me otherwise." "You're going to eat every single day anyway. Let's start there." "If you follow perfectly and then go on vacation and everything gets thrown off, you ain't coming back." CHAPTER MARKERS 2:46 Dafna's story and why she got into women's nutrition 8:28 When "normal" bloodwork actually isn't normal 12:54 How Dafna's program works and what customized really means 19:39 Meal structure, blood sugar, and what to actually eat 35:32 The GPS mindset and letting go of the restart cycle YOUR TURN This week's reflection: Where are you still waiting for someone else to validate what you already know about your own body? ----- All Heart & Soul's Details: Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/] Join the mastermind program:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/heartsoul⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/heartsoul] Say hi to Mariah on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@mariahmckechnie Say hi to Monique on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@moniqueforcier Leave a review on the Apple Podcast app and the Spotify app: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ MB01Q2UET7NDZEX

Why You Actually Get People Wrong (And What Generations Have to Do With It)

We throw around words like "boomer" and "millennial" all the time, but do we actually understand what shaped those generations and why it matters for every relationship in our lives? Monique and I have been wanting to dig into this one for a while, and honestly the timing felt perfect. Right before we hit record, I was telling her about a moment with my mom and some of my high school best friends where the conversation just cracked something open. My mom offered perspective on relating to their own mothers that none of us had thought to ask for, and it landed differently coming from her. That moment is kind of what this whole episode is about. We walked through every living generation, from Baby Boomers to Gen Alpha, and talked about what shaped each one, how they show up in relationships and work, and how we can actually connect across those divides instead of just getting frustrated by them. Key Themes + Takeaways: Baby Boomers (1946-1964) defined themselves through career and loyalty, and many weren't taught to process emotions because the generations before them simply couldn't Gen X (1965-1980) built trust through consistency, not words, and their independence came directly from being left to figure things out Millennials (1981-1996) brought emotional self-development into the mainstream and are dealing with burnout, comparison culture, and a deep need for purpose and meaning Gen Z (1997-2012) are digital natives who value authenticity and psychological safety above almost everything, and they're pushing back on overly polished communication including AI Gen Alpha (2013-present) are the most tech-integrated generation yet and will need intentional guidance around critical thinking, emotional regulation, and real-world presence When you're struggling to connect with someone from a different generation, stop asking your peers. Ask someone from that generation instead. Judgment is the killer of understanding. Empathy starts with context. Our Favorite Quotes: "Instead of having the reaction of like, how do you just not know how that works, approaching it from compassion and empathy and understanding that we just aren't coming at this from the same place of life." "Trust is built through consistency, not words." "Judgment is really the killer of understanding. If we can just set judgment aside and be like, help me understand what's going on." "Ask your kids for help. Seek outside of your generation. I've learned so much from my kids." Chapter Markers: 0:00 Rainy day in the studio  3:30 Breaking down Baby Boomers  8:28 Gen X, that's us  13:43 The millennial moment  17:34 Getting into Gen Z  21:20 Meet Gen Alpha  25:52 What intergenerational connection actually looks like  29:14 Mariah's story that started it all Your Turn: Think about someone in your life from a different generation who you sometimes struggle to understand. What do you know about what shaped them? What would shift if you approached that relationship with more context and a little less judgment? ----- All Heart & Soul's Details: Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/] Join the mastermind program:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/heartsoul⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/heartsoul] Say hi to Mariah on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@mariahmckechnie Say hi to Monique on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@moniqueforcier Leave a review on the Apple Podcast app and the Spotify app: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ MB01BZTHMMP4NTR

The Clutter You Can't See: A Conversation on Spiritual Decluttering with Monique

What if the heaviest thing you're carrying... was never yours to begin with? You know how we've been on this whole decluttering journey together? We're talking spiritual decluttering — and before you picture someone sitting in lotus pose chanting at a shrine, let me stop you right there. This isn't about what you do. It's about what you let go of. The beliefs you inherited but never examined. The emotions you've been lugging around that aren't even yours. The mental chatter that drowns out your own inner wisdom. Monique is an energy worker and one of my dearest spiritual companions, and honestly — having her in my life feels like a constant gentle recalibration. I hope this conversation does the same for you. Key Themes + Takeaways Spiritual decluttering isn't about becoming someone new — it's about stripping away what's outdated, inherited, or simply no longer true for you, so your real self can come through. So much of what we carry came from someone else — childhood belief systems, religious guardrails, family patterns. The powerful question is: Do I actually believe this? Or did I just absorb it? Stuckness is spiritual clutter. If you feel like you can't move forward, it might not be a circumstance problem — it could be unprocessed weight sitting in your body, your mind, or your energy. Your spiritual practice doesn't have to look like anyone else's. Walking in nature, journaling, prayer, a massage, rest, listening to a podcast — it all counts. The form matters less than the intention. You don't have to do it all at once. Spiritual decluttering is maintenance, not overhaul. Just like I grab the trash out of my car every single time I get out — small, consistent acts of releasing add up to a lighter life. You can just... let go. I used to think releasing something meant working really hard for it. Turns out, you can simply choose: I release this. It no longer serves me. It's a decision. And yes, it might come back — but you can choose again. Ask yourself the questions that cut through: What feels heavy right now? Is this mine to carry? What's in the way of where I want to be? What's one thing I can let go of today? Our Favorite Quotes "The more you declutter spiritually, the more clearly you can hear yourself. That's really what it's all about." — Monique "We're an accumulation society. And we just need to get back to our core essence of who we are." — Mariah & Monique "You can't keep hanging on and dragging the third grader who got bullied everywhere with you. You gotta tell her she's okay. Heal her, integrate her, and let go of the story that's no longer serving you." — Monique "It's not about overhauling your life. It's about letting go of what isn't yours anymore — and maybe it never was." — Monique Chapter Markers 00:00 — The Clean Car We All Need (But Make It Spiritual)  03:01 — So... What Is Spiritual Decluttering, Really?  07:33 — The Emotional Weight We Were Never Taught to Put Down  12:33 — A Live Guided Practice: Where Do You Feel Heavy?  18:45 — Daily Maintenance vs. The Big Overhaul  25:22 — You Can Actually Just... Let Go  31:10 — Cycles, Shedding, and the Art of Beginning Again Your Turn This week's reflection: What is one thing you've been carrying that might not actually be yours? Sit with it. Breathe. And ask yourself — is this mine to carry today? You don't have to solve it. You don't have to fix it. You just have to notice it — and give yourself permission to set it down, even just for a moment. ----- All Heart & Soul's Details: Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/] Join the mastermind program:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/heartsoul⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/heartsoul] Say hi to Mariah on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@mariahmckechnie Say hi to Monique on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@moniqueforcier Leave a review on the Apple Podcast app and the Spotify app: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ MB01FDPMCL22UQ8

Does a Cluttered Home Really Affect Your Mental Health?

What if the pile of stuff sitting in the corner of your room isn't just clutter, it's actually you, holding on for dear life? This episode cracked something open for me, because I finally said out loud what I've been quietly avoiding: my physical spaces are a mess, and it's messing with my mind. Okay, so here's the thing. A few episodes back, Monique and I dove into the many faces of letting go. And one of those faces? Physical clutter. The stuff piled in your car. The paperwork you walk past every single day. The closet that holds every version of you that ever existed. I am very much living in a full house—literally and figuratively. I love being surrounded by things that carry memories. A shirt I bought in Italy. My kids' old baby onesies. That one coat I haven't worn in three years but cannot get rid of. Sound familiar? Here's what I've realized: physical clutter isn't just a visual problem. It's emotional. It's mental. And if you've been walking through life feeling foggy or heavy and you can't quite figure out why—it might be time to take a good, honest look around you. ✨ Key Themes + Takeaways Physical clutter is mental clutter. Your exterior environment is often a direct reflection of your interior one. A cluttered space isn't just inconvenient—it's draining your mental energy without you even realizing it. Start with the thing that's not emotional. The car is a great place to begin. It's practical, it's contained, and cleaning it out won't send you into a spiral. Bite-sized beats boiling the ocean. Don't try to declutter your entire life in one afternoon. One drawer. One corner. One car. Then celebrate that it's done before you move to the next thing. Habit stacking makes it feel less like a chore. Pair your donation drop-off with a stop for a coffee or a quick nail appointment. Make the errand attractive, not dreaded. You'll actually do the thing. Close the loop. Take the winter boots all the way to the basement—not just inside the front door. Finishing one task from start to finish, without detours, is its own kind of magic. Some clutter is emotional, not just physical. The pile of papers I keep walking past isn't really about paperwork—there's something deeper keeping me stuck. Before I can clear it, I might need to sit with why I'm avoiding it. Your stuff holds your stories. The closet isn't just fabric and hangers. It's your past career, your past marriage, a version of you that deserves to be honored—and then gently released. Our Favorite Quotes "Physical clutter is mental clutter—and if you don't acknowledge that, you're just living in it and you don't know why." "I'm holding on to something that could be put back into the flow of the universe. And who am I to just be sitting on this?" "I needed to know it was going somewhere good. That's a big part of it." "Your exterior environment is a reflection of your interior environment." "Future me is really going to be the best version of present me." Chapter Markers 00:00 — The Clutter Confession 03:01 — Why Stuff Weighs So Much 09:18 — Starting with the Car: A Real-Time Plan 16:38 — Habit Stacking & the Errand Strategy 20:57 — The Paperwork Pile and What It's Really About 24:17 — The Closet Chronicles 37:55 — Riding the Wave Through the Mess Your Turn This week's check-in and journaling prompt: Walk through your home—or your car, your office, wherever you spend the most time—and notice what's waiting for you. Pick one thing. Just one. What is it, and what story are you telling yourself about why it's still there? ----- All Heart & Soul's Details: Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/] Join the mastermind program:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/heartsoul⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.heartandsoulmastermind.com/heartsoul] Say hi to Mariah on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@mariahmckechnie Say hi to Monique on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠@moniqueforcier Leave a review on the Apple Podcast app and the Spotify app: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️