Here’s What I Know…

Here's What I Know...About Being Born

30 min · 23 de oct de 2025
Portada del episodio Here's What I Know...About Being Born

Descripción

Today’s episode is an origin story with the edges left on. I pick up a chapter I once wrote called “Being Born,” and talk through the real beginning: born out of wedlock, a name that wasn’t my father’s, in and out of foster care, a near-adoption, and a kind, brilliant mother who didn’t have the tools. I share how a steady farmhouse (thank you, Beverly), a big-hearted sister (hi, Denise), and a stubborn streak of resilience kept me from breaking—and how early trauma twisted my sense of worth until I learned to untangle it. This isn’t an autobiography; it’s context for why I care so much about helping people navigate life without a script. The headline I’ve earned: survival informs adaptation, and beginnings don’t dictate endings. If your story feels chaotic, you’re not broken—you’re mid-chapter. We’ll lighten it up on Friday. For now, breathe, give yourself some credit, and be kind (even when people are… a lot). Content note: brief mentions of childhood sexual abuse.

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5 episodios

episode Here’s What I Know...About Having the Right Tools artwork

Here’s What I Know...About Having the Right Tools

People love to say, “They just need to get a job,” “They just need to stop using,” “They just need to grow up.” Cool. With what tools? In this episode, I talk about how we learn (or don’t learn) basic life skills: coping, showing up, respecting people, self-regulating, making decent choices even when no one’s watching. We act like those are automatic, but they’re taught. By someone. On purpose. Over years. And a lot of people just… never got that. We get into: * Why “just try harder” is useless advice for someone who was never shown how to try in the first place. * How coping skills, consequences, self-control, work ethic, and basic responsibility are literally tools kids are supposed to be handed by adults. * Why some 22-year-olds look “lazy,” when what they actually are is unequipped. * Addiction, self-regulation, and why “just stop doing drugs” is not a plan. * The myth that people automatically get wiser with age. (You can be 55 and still have 12-year-old coping skills. You’ve met these people.) * Giving kids choices, not control — and why that matters. * The difference between “bad behavior” and “no one ever taught me how.” If you’ve ever said “they just need to ___,” this one’s for you. Takeaway: You cannot expect someone to use tools they were never given. Have a little grace — and if you can help, help in a way that serves them, not your ego.

30 de oct de 202529 min
episode Here's What I Know...About Being Born artwork

Here's What I Know...About Being Born

Today’s episode is an origin story with the edges left on. I pick up a chapter I once wrote called “Being Born,” and talk through the real beginning: born out of wedlock, a name that wasn’t my father’s, in and out of foster care, a near-adoption, and a kind, brilliant mother who didn’t have the tools. I share how a steady farmhouse (thank you, Beverly), a big-hearted sister (hi, Denise), and a stubborn streak of resilience kept me from breaking—and how early trauma twisted my sense of worth until I learned to untangle it. This isn’t an autobiography; it’s context for why I care so much about helping people navigate life without a script. The headline I’ve earned: survival informs adaptation, and beginnings don’t dictate endings. If your story feels chaotic, you’re not broken—you’re mid-chapter. We’ll lighten it up on Friday. For now, breathe, give yourself some credit, and be kind (even when people are… a lot). Content note: brief mentions of childhood sexual abuse.

23 de oct de 202530 min