Why You Struggle to Advocate for Yourself at Work (Even When You Know You Should)

What Leaders Actually Need From You (That No One Tells You)

Episode Description Most professionals focus on meeting expectations. But rising leaders learn something different: advancement often comes from understanding what leaders actually need from the people around them. In this episode of Leader on the Rise, Mim Abbey explores the four things leaders consistently value most—yet rarely articulate clearly. These aren't technical skills or job descriptions. They're the qualities that make leaders trust you with greater responsibility, larger opportunities, and more complex challenges. Drawing from leadership research, organizational psychology, and years of coaching leaders across industries, Mim explains why clarity, judgment, ownership, and calm under pressure are often more important than flawless execution. You'll learn how leaders experience the people around them, what creates trust at higher levels, and how to become someone leaders increasingly rely on rather than manage. What You'll Learn * The difference between meeting expectations and meeting leadership needs * Why leaders evaluate more than execution * How clarity reduces cognitive load * The role of judgment in leadership trust * Why ownership signals leadership readiness * How proactive thinking accelerates advancement * The importance of emotional regulation under pressure * How leaders decide who is ready for more responsibility * What makes leaders feel confident when you're involved * Practical ways to become a more trusted partner to leadership Featured Research & Insights * Center for Creative Leadership research on leadership derailment and level transitions * Leadership Pipeline research on advancement and role shifts * Studies on cognitive load and decision-making * Research on emotional regulation and leadership effectiveness * Organizational psychology findings on trust and leadership readiness * Leadership perception research on judgment and ownership * Executive development studies on leadership transitions and advancement Why It Matters As careers progress, leaders begin evaluating something beyond performance. They ask: * Can I trust this person's judgment? * Do they think ahead? * Do they reduce complexity? * Do they create clarity? * Do they remain steady when things get difficult? The professionals who rise aren't simply the hardest workers. They're the people who make leadership's job easier. By consistently delivering clarity, judgment, ownership, and calm, you begin building the kind of trust that transforms careers—and positions you for the next level.

Why You Struggle to Advocate for Yourself at Work (Even When You Know You Should)

Episode Description You know what you want to say. You know what you should ask for. And yet somehow, in the moment, you hold back. In this episode of Leader on the Rise, Mim Abbey explores why so many capable professionals struggle to advocate for themselves at work—even when they know exactly what needs to be said. Drawing from neuroscience, leadership psychology, and executive coaching, Mim explains why self-advocacy is not simply a confidence issue. Instead, it is often a deeply learned response to perceived social risk, rejection, and conflict. You'll learn why professionals soften their messages, over-explain, delay important conversations, and defer to others—and how those patterns quietly limit leadership presence and career growth. Most importantly, you'll learn how to replace those patterns with direct, credible, leadership-oriented communication that allows your voice, ideas, and perspective to be heard. What You'll Learn * Why self-advocacy is often misunderstood * The neuroscience behind speaking up and holding back * How social risk influences workplace behavior * Why professionals soften, delay, and over-explain * The difference between assertiveness and aggression * The "Goldilocks Zone" of effective self-advocacy * Why leadership requires clear self-representation * How to communicate recommendations more directly * The power of the One-Sentence Stand * Practical ways to strengthen leadership voice and presence Featured Research & Insights * Naomi Eisenberger's UCLA research on social pain and social rejection * The Cyberball study and its implications for workplace behavior * Daniel Ames and Francis Flynn's Columbia Business School research on assertiveness and leadership effectiveness * Research on workplace self-advocacy and career advancement * Studies on leadership presence and communication credibility * Neuroscience research on threat perception and decision-making * Organizational psychology findings on influence and leadership visibility Why It Matters The cost of not advocating for yourself isn't simply missed opportunities. It's misrepresentation. People cannot value ideas they never hear. Leaders cannot trust judgment that is never expressed. Organizations cannot develop leadership potential they cannot see. Learning to advocate for yourself isn't about becoming louder, more aggressive, or more self-promotional. It's about representing reality clearly. And the ability to do that—to communicate your perspective, needs, recommendations, and boundaries directly—is one of the most important leadership skills you can develop.

The 5 Conversations That Change Your Career Trajectory

Episode Description What actually shapes a career? Most people assume it's major projects, performance reviews, or big opportunities. And while those things matter, careers are often shaped by something much smaller—and much more frequent. Conversations. In this episode of Leader on the Rise, Mim Abbey explores the five conversations that consistently accelerate careers and strengthen leadership readiness. These are the conversations many professionals avoid because they feel uncomfortable, vulnerable, or risky. Yet they're often the very conversations that create clarity, visibility, trust, and advancement. Drawing from workplace communication research, leadership psychology, and real coaching examples, Mim breaks down the five career-changing conversations every ambitious professional should be having—and provides practical language you can use to start them. If you've been waiting to be noticed, hoping things will change on their own, or delaying conversations you know you need to have, this episode will help you take the initiative and create momentum. What You'll Learn * Why avoided conversations often become career obstacles * The psychology behind communication avoidance * Why difficult conversations strengthen relationships more often than they damage them * How to align expectations with your manager * The importance of visibility conversations * How to ask for meaningful feedback * Why boundary conversations demonstrate leadership maturity * How to discuss advancement proactively * The role of curiosity in high-stakes conversations * How conversations create clarity, trust, and opportunity Featured Research & Insights * Crucial Learning research on high-stakes conversations and workplace avoidance * Research on manager-employee expectation alignment * Tasha Eurich's work on self-awareness and perception gaps * Studies on career advancement and proactive communication * Research on workplace trust and relationship-building * Leadership development findings on feedback-seeking behavior * Organizational psychology research on difficult conversations and professional growth Why It Matters Many professionals spend years waiting for recognition, feedback, opportunities, or advancement conversations to find them. But careers rarely move forward through hope. They move forward through clarity. The professionals who rise learn how to initiate conversations that create alignment, surface opportunities, close perception gaps, and make their ambitions visible. Because your manager cannot read your mind. Leadership cannot support goals you've never expressed. And opportunities often begin with a conversation someone was willing to start.

Why High Performers Get Stuck (Even When They're Doing Everything Right)

Episode Description You work hard. You deliver results. You're reliable, capable, and committed. So why does it sometimes feel like your career has stalled? In this episode of Leader on the Rise, Mim Abbey explores one of the most frustrating realities in professional life: why high performers often get stuck despite doing many of the things that made them successful in the first place. This episode challenges the common belief that hard work alone drives advancement and explores the hidden shifts that occur as careers progress. You'll learn why the behaviors that help professionals stand out early in their careers can eventually become the very things that limit growth. Drawing from leadership psychology, organizational behavior, and executive coaching, Mim unpacks the patterns that keep talented professionals from reaching the next level—and what rising leaders do differently. If you've ever felt overlooked, underutilized, or uncertain about what's holding you back, this episode will help you identify the invisible barriers that may be standing between you and your next opportunity. What You'll Learn * Why hard work alone eventually stops driving advancement * The hidden difference between performance and leadership * Why high performers often become trapped in execution * How visibility influences career growth * The role of strategic thinking in advancement * Why leaders are evaluated differently than contributors * How identity can limit future growth * The importance of influence and relationship-building * Why leadership readiness is often misunderstood * Practical ways to break through career plateaus Featured Research & Insights * The Peter Principle and its implications for advancement * Leadership Pipeline research on the transition from contributor to leader * Herminia Ibarra's work on leadership identity and career transitions * Center for Creative Leadership research on leadership derailment * Studies on visibility, influence, and organizational perception * Research on strategic thinking and executive advancement * Organizational psychology findings on leadership readiness and promotion decisions Why It Matters Many professionals assume that if they continue producing excellent work, advancement will naturally follow. But as careers progress, the criteria change. Leaders begin looking for different signals: * strategic thinking * judgment * influence * visibility * leadership presence * the ability to elevate outcomes through others The challenge is that most people never receive direct feedback about this shift. Instead, they continue optimizing for the behaviors that made them successful in the past. Understanding what changes at higher levels can help you stop working harder and start growing differently. Because the next level rarely requires more effort. It often requires a different way of thinking, communicating, and leading.

How to Influence Decisions When You're Not in the Room

Episode Description Somewhere inside your organization, conversations are happening right now that will shape careers, promotions, opportunities, and leadership trajectories. And you are not in the room. In this episode of Leader on the Rise, Mim Abbey explores one of the most advanced — and least understood — leadership skills in organizations: how to influence decisions when you are not physically present. This conversation breaks down the hidden architecture of organizational influence, including informal networks, trusted relationships, advocates, connectors, and the invisible conversations shaping leadership decisions behind the scenes. You'll learn why influence is not about manipulation or politics, but about building trust widely, investing in relationships intentionally, and creating a reputation that travels through the organization even when you are absent. Drawing from organizational network theory, leadership psychology, and real-world executive coaching, this episode explains how rising leaders build influence long before they need it. If you want your leadership to scale beyond the rooms you enter personally, this episode will help you understand how influence truly moves through organizations. What You'll Learn * Why organizations operate through informal influence networks * The hidden structure behind leadership decisions * How trusted relationships shape advancement * The importance of connectors and advocates * Why influence depends on trust, not visibility alone * How to map organizational influence * The role of pre-wiring important conversations * Why strong advocates accelerate careers * How rising leaders build influence strategically * The relationship habits that create long-term career leverage Featured Research & Insights * Stanley Milgram's "small world" and six degrees research * Organizational network analysis research from IBM's Institute for Business Value * Adam Grant's research on "otherish" givers and organizational influence * Harvard Business School research from Michael Roberto on pre-wiring and decision quality * Herminia Ibarra and Mark Hunter's research on diverse advocate networks * Organizational psychology research on trust, reputation, and informal influence Why It Matters Careers are shaped not only by performance — but by trust traveling through networks. Inside organizations, influence spreads through: * relationships * advocates * connectors * trusted voices * informal conversations The professionals who rise consistently understand that leadership is not confined to formal authority. It is built through credibility, generosity, relationship depth, and the ability to create trust across multiple parts of the organization. Influence is not a personality trait. It is a leadership practice. And it compounds over time.