ADHD, Masking & Performing Normal

ADHD, Masking & Performing Normal

In the final episode of our series with Rian DeVeer, we talk about ADHD, masking, and the exhausting experience of trying to perform “normal.” We discuss the ways people learn to adapt socially — especially in creative industries, school, professional environments, and relationships — and how masking can sometimes become so automatic that you lose track of what actually feels authentic. Together we explore: * ADHD and overstimulation * People pleasing and performative behavior * Masking in professional spaces * The pressure to fit in socially * Learning to unmask safely * Creativity and neurodivergence * The emotional fatigue of constantly adapting * The difference between confidence and performance * What authenticity actually feels like This conversation is reflective, honest, and something many people experience without realizing there’s a name for it. Licensed? Yes. Masking? Less than we used to.

Feral Kids, Masking & Growing Up in Michigan ⭐ (With Rian DevVeer)

In this episode of License & Unsupervised, we talk about growing up in Michigan in the 90s — when Shelby Township still felt like the sticks, bonfires at Eisenhower were normal, and kids were basically feral. We discuss: * Car culture and growing up near the Motor City * Graduation memories from the 90s * Old-school pranks and the chaos of growing up before social media * Customer service and why it still matters * Car accidents, consequences, and how life teaches lessons * The rise of car wrapping culture * Crimes from the past finally coming to light The conversation also gets deeper as we talk about: * ADHD and growing up as people pleasers * Masking in straight-laced environments * Trying to fit into spaces that didn’t fully feel like us * How our moms “mommed” us differently * What it means to be performative vs authentic And somewhere in the middle of all of it, Naomi tells a story very badly. Licensed? Yes. Supervised? Definitely not in the 90s.

Names, Identity & High School Stories (with Rian DeVeer) ⭐

In this episode of License & Unsupervised, we welcome back our “supervisor,” Rian DeVeer, for a conversation about identity, high school experiences, and how we all became who we are today. We talk about growing up in different decades — the 80s, 90s, and early 2000s — and how those environments shaped us. Rian shares his experience as a trans man, including how he chose his name and what that journey has looked like over time. We also talk about something surprisingly universal — how often people get our names wrong, and how names can carry identity, meaning, and history. We also discuss: * High school experiences across generations * Bullying and fitting in * Fashion and self-expression as teenagers * Private school vs public school experiences * Teen pregnancy and life paths * How different high school feels today compared to when we grew up * Why identity evolves — and how we learn to own it This episode is reflective, honest, and about understanding people beyond first impressions. Licensed? Yes. Still becoming? Always.

Meet Our (Temporary) Supervisor: Rian DeVeer on Learning, Confidence & the Industry ⭐

In this episode of License & Unsupervised, we’re joined by our first official “supervisor” — Rian DeVeer. We start with origin stories — how we all got to where we are today, how we first met Rian, and the impressions that stuck. From there, we talk about his experience in beauty school as both a student and a teacher, and how education in the hair industry has evolved across generations. We get into: * Men in the hair industry and how that has changed over time * Confidence — especially for men in a creative space * Learning hair through print vs learning through YouTube * The influence of artists like Guy Tang * Behind the Chair magazine and how we used to learn from print * How Rian learned through digital platforms * Working together on set for the Empower shoot and magazine * Teaching at beauty school and favorite educators * Trends like the “money piece” * World records in the hair industry * And the wild creativity of artists like Dean Banowetz This episode is about growth, learning, confidence, and how different generations of stylists find their way in the industry. Licensed? Yes. Supervised? Finally.

Can Stylists Ever Be Anonymous? ⭐

This is a shorter episode of License & Unsupervised while we catch up from a couple missed weeks. Today we’re talking about something simple but real — what it’s like trying to walk into a hair salon anonymously… and why that’s basically impossible where we live. We share stories from our time as educators, what it was like teaching and learning at the same time, and how we’ve used ourselves as models for growth behind the chair. We also talk about: * Apprentices and how we support them * Practicing on real people (including ourselves) * Why neither of us wants to do perms * Showing up for clients and students * Being generalists in an industry that pushes specialization This one is quick, honest, and very “behind the scenes.” Licensed? Yes. Anonymous? Not a chance.