Do I need closure? The art of healing forward

Do I need closure? The art of healing forward

We often imagine closure like a neat little bow on a gift: A final conversation, a heartfelt apology or a clear explanation that suddenly makes all the pain make sense. But what happens when that moment never comes? What if the person who hurt you isn't capable of giving you what you need? What if waiting for closure might actually be keeping us stuck in the very place we’re trying to leave? Related links:  * Emotional regulation episode [https://lifeinthegrey.transistor.fm/episodes/shouldn-t-i-be-past-this-healing-evolves-not-erases] * Mum to Mum with Doctor Tash podcast [https://mumtomum.transistor.fm/]  ✨ Ready to be a little kinder to yourself? Download our free 5-day self-compassion challenge [https://mumsatthetable.com/5-day-self-compassion-challenge/]—with daily prompts, gentle exercises and tools to help you stop the spiral of self-criticism and start speaking to yourself like a friend.

Shouldn’t I be past this? Healing evolves, not erases

Have you ever walked away from a conversation thinking, I should have said something . . . or maybe, I’m glad I didn’t? In this episode, we sit in that uncomfortable in-between and ask ourselves: When is it wise to speak up and advocate for our rights, and when is it actually okay to step back and “escape”?  We’re unpacking our own wrestles with assertiveness, people-pleasing, self-protection and pride. This is one of those nuanced, no-easy-answer conversations. Just two of us thinking out loud about power, safety, timing and what the wiser move might look like in the grey. Related links:  * The episode [https://lifeinthegrey.transistor.fm/episodes/is-my-body-wrong-unlearning-the-lies-about-our-bodies] when Faith talks about highways and off-ramps. ✨ Ready to be a little kinder to yourself? Download our free 5-day self-compassion challenge [https://mumsatthetable.com/5-day-self-compassion-challenge/]—with daily prompts, gentle exercises and tools to help you stop the spiral of self-criticism and start speaking to yourself like a friend.

Should I speak up? Choosing the wiser move

Have you ever walked away from a conversation thinking, I should have said something . . . or maybe, I’m glad I didn’t? In this episode, we sit in that uncomfortable in-between and ask ourselves: When is it wise to speak up and advocate for our rights, and when is it actually okay to step back and “escape”?  We’re unpacking our own wrestles with assertiveness, people-pleasing, self-protection and pride. This is one of those nuanced, no-easy-answer conversations. Just two of us thinking out loud about power, safety, timing and what the wiser move might look like in the grey. ✨ Ready to be a little kinder to yourself? Download our free 5-day self-compassion challenge [https://mumsatthetable.com/5-day-self-compassion-challenge/]—with daily prompts, gentle exercises and tools to help you stop the spiral of self-criticism and start speaking to yourself like a friend.

Big feelings again? Let’s not rush to “regulate"

Ever found yourself naming your child’s (or partner’s, or your own) big feelings and then thinking, “Okay, so why aren’t we calm yet?” Nope, it's not just you. In this episode, we chat about why “self-regulation” has started to feel like a pressure-filled performance metric, rather than the compassionate tool it’s meant to be. How do we sit with the discomfort? When should we question our timelines for “getting over it”? This is what it looks like in real life: Messy, human and very much still a work in progress. Join us in the grey. Related links: * Article: "Emotional regulation isn’t about staying calm. It’s about this [https://mumsatthetable.com/emotional-regulation/]" ✨ Ready to be a little kinder to yourself? Download our free 5-day self-compassion challenge [https://mumsatthetable.com/5-day-self-compassion-challenge/]—with daily prompts, gentle exercises and tools to help you stop the spiral of self-criticism and start speaking to yourself like a friend.

Should we be nervous? The comments are in

We did the thing you’re never quite sure you’re ready for—we read the comments. The thoughtful ones, the confusing ones, the ones that made us pause, nod or quietly rethink things. If you’ve ever hesitated before opening a comment thread, or wondered what happens on the other side of the mic, come sit with us. Notes/additional info:  * At 3:07, the individual Melody is referring to is Roxane Gay, not Rosamund Gay.  Related links:  * Episode 010: "Who's helping who? When support feels like an accusation [https://lifeinthegrey.transistor.fm/episodes/whos-helping-who-when-support-feels-like-an-accusation]" * Episode 001: "Are you a failure? When proven methods don't work for you [https://lifeinthegrey.transistor.fm/episodes/are-you-a-failure-when-proven-methods-don-t-work-for-you]"  * Episode 002: "Are you judging me? Or is it my trauma? [https://lifeinthegrey.transistor.fm/episodes/are-you-judging-me-or-is-it-my-trauma]" * Episode 004: "Is my body wrong? Unlearning the lies about our bodies [https://lifeinthegrey.transistor.fm/episodes/is-my-body-wrong-unlearning-the-lies-about-our-bodies]" * Episode 009: "Is it me? Rewiring relationships without gaslighting myself [https://lifeinthegrey.transistor.fm/episodes/is-it-me-rewiring-relationships-without-gaslighting-myself]" * Article "Four guiding questions for discerning what's yours to carry—and what you need to lovingly set down [https://healingf8th.substack.com/p/whats-mine-to-carry]" ✨ Ready to be a little kinder to yourself? Download our free 5-day self-compassion challenge [https://mumsatthetable.com/5-day-self-compassion-challenge/]—with daily prompts, gentle exercises and tools to help you stop the spiral of self-criticism and start speaking to yourself like a friend.