Ep. 112 A Ping Pong Ball Stuck WHERE & The Mystery of the White Dog Poo

Ep. 112 A Ping Pong Ball Stuck WHERE & The Mystery of the White Dog Poo

Get ready for another laugh-out-loud ride with Danny, James, Jake, and Rachel! We are back in the studio for Episode 112, and things are getting dangerously spicy and incredibly embarrassing. First up in "Have You Heard?", Jake introduces us to the world's most petty public monument. A local councillor in Cork, Ireland, has pitched building the world's smallest statue—a microscopic replica of the exact mosquito that infected Oliver Cromwell with malaria in 1658. We break down the sheer historical banter of treating a bug like an unrecognized national hero just to build a record-holding tourist trap. In "Confessionals," James brings the heat with two utterly mortifying stories.• A stressed maid of honor tries to clean a tiny scuff off the bride's white satin shoes in the dark hallway, but accidentally grabs a bottle of liquid ultra-dark fake tan instead of micellar water, leaving muddy brown streaks all down the front of a pristine wedding gown.• A harmless game of naked ping pong goes horribly wrong when a wife decides to serve the ball from her vagina, completely underestimating her pelvic floor strength and forcing her to frantically fish it back out while her husband watches in horror. We reach into "Rachel's Furry Box" to answer a very revealing question: of the people in the room, who would you trade lives with for a day?. The boys give some highly questionable answers about wanting to experience life with female anatomy, while Rachel admits she wants to trade places with James just to experience the repression of being a "Fenian for a day" and attend an Orange March. In "Boys Catch Yourselves On," Rachel tackles the bizarre phenomenon of men pacing during phone calls. The boys defend their autopilot laps around the kitchen island and mysteriously ending up three postcodes away, while Rachel points out that a man on the phone looks like he's negotiating a hostage release, whereas a woman pacing means fresh gossip is being downloaded at dangerous speeds. Danny dives into the biological gutter for "What the FAQ?" to ask: whatever happened to the iconic white chalky dog poo from the 90s?. He explains how cheap, bone-meal-filled canine diets used to overload dogs with calcium that calcified in the sun, and how modern pet food regulations finally saved our pavements from these fossilized Victorian artifacts. Finally, we update our Spotify playlist, "The Middlers Soundtrack," with some fresh tracks. This week we add "Fire For You" by Cannons, "Toca's Miracle" by Fragma, "Mexico Honey" by Kacey Musgraves, and "Mind's Eye" by Marcello Spooks. FOLLOW AND HIT THE BELL NOTIFICATION TO NEVER MISS AN EPISODE! 📧 Want to contact us?Mail: team@meetinthemiddlepod.comInstagram: @podcast.meetinthemiddle 🎵 Intro and Outro: Living Kills - The Noise

Ep. 111 The Danger of LooksMaxxing & Kink Lying Confessions

Grab a cushion for your hole because Episode 111 of Meet in the Middle is officially off the rails!We kick things off in "Have You Heard?" where Jake takes us down one of the darkest internet rabbit holes yet: LooksMaxxing. Lads on TikTok are going to extreme lengths to get that blocky, Minecraft-character jawline. From aggressively chewing rubber devices that destroy teeth to "hardmaxxing" with DIY bone restructuring (yes, literally tapping their own cheekbones with tools), the boys debate the alpha vs. beta mindset. Rachel reminds everyone that nobody wants to cuddle up to a literal brick in bed, so maybe just work on your chat instead?In "Confessionals," James brings two of the most unhinged stories we’ve ever heard. First, a girl’s ex-military dad thinks a burglar is trapped in her wardrobe due to a loud, aggressive thumping noise. Armed with a heavy-duty Teflon frying pan, he rips the door open and beats her £70 luxury industrial vibrator into absolute atoms. The aftermath? A note left behind saying: "The perimeter is secure. See you Sunday for a roast."Then, we listen to a chaotic voice note about a university hookup gone wrong. After lying about being into "pet play" because the guy was built like a brick shithouse, a girl ends up on all fours in a literal dog leash. When he commands her to bark, her polite "Please!" gets her called a lying b*tch and kicked out of the house—resulting in her stealing his dog collar and taking a late-night trip to McDonald's.For "Rachel's Furry Purse," the gang plays a risky game of truth by pulling out the ultimate awkward question: Do you watch pornography? Cue the immediate fluster! We reminisce about the struggle of downloading a single still image on Windows 98, sneaking a 10-minute preview on Sky TV, and the childhood rite of passage that was finding a discarded, weather-ruined adult magazine hidden in the local woods.Finally, in "Boys Catch Yourself On," Rachel tackles the ultimate lie told by men: "I'm easy." Why do guys claim they don't care what takeaway to order, only to launch a 20-minute rejection tour of every Chinese, pizza, and kebab shop in a 5-mile radius?Finally, we update our Spotify playlist, "The Middlers Soundtrack," with some fresh tracks. This week we add "Figuring It Out" by Royal Blood, "Black Lilies" by Parov Stelar, "Pretty Lady" by Tash Sultana, and "Weak in the Presence of Beauty" by Alison Moyet.FOLLOW AND HIT THE BELL NOTIFICATION TO NEVER MISS AN EPISODE!📧 Want to contact us?Mail: team@meetinthemiddlepod.comInstagram: @podcast.meetinthemiddle🎵 Intro and Outro: Living Kills - The Noise#MeetInTheMiddle #Podcast #IrishHumour #Looksmaxxing #Mewing #VibratorDisaster #PetPlay #DogCollar #Banter #Storytime

Ep. 110 A Ghost at Sunday Roast & The 7,000-Yard Glitter Bomb

Get ready for another laugh-out-loud ride with Danny, James, Jake, and Rachel! We are back in the studio for Episode 110, and things are getting wonderfully weird and incredibly embarrassing.First up in "Have You Heard?", Jake explores the ultimate competitive sport: extreme revenge on cheating partners. We break down the legendary 7,000-yard glitter bomb, a brutal digital billboard breakup on the Sheffield Parkway, and a savage $2 million art heist disguised as a divorce settlement.In "Confessionals," James brings the heat with two utterly mortifying stories. • A listener secretly steals a vintage perfume that belonged to her boyfriend's recently deceased nan. When she wears it to a family Sunday roast, the entire room bursts into tears, convinced the nan's ghost is visiting—and now she has to attend a family seance. • A trip to Primark takes a violent turn when a listener tries to open a packet of fruity Mentos, accidentally firing one like a bullet directly into a small child's head.We reach into "Rachel's Furry Box" to answer a tricky question: which podcast host would you trade lives with for a day? The boys give some highly questionable biological answers about wanting to experience a day as a woman, while Rachel admits she wants to trade places with James just to see what it's like on the other side of the Irish border.In "Boys Catch Yourselves On," Rachel tackles the bizarre phenomenon of men falling asleep instantly anywhere. The crew debates how men manage to nap fully clothed in jeans, pass out on airport floors, and sleep through anything, while women need absolute silence and a perfect skincare routine just to close their eyes.Danny dives into the biological gutter for "What the FAQ?" to ask: what side of the body is the healthiest to sleep on? He explains why rolling onto your left side stops you from marinating your throat in stomach acid and acts as an anatomical cheat code for a structurally sound morning trip to the toilet.Finally, we update our Spotify playlist, "The Middlers Soundtrack," with some fresh tracks. This week we add "Figuring It Out" by Royal Blood, "Black Lilies" by Parov Stelar, "Pretty Lady" by Tash Sultana, and "Weak in the Presence of Beauty" by Alison Moyet. FOLLOW AND HIT THE BELL NOTIFICATION TO NEVER MISS AN EPISODE! 📧 Want to contact us? Mail: team@meetinthemiddlepod.com Instagram: @podcast.meetinthemiddle 🎵 Intro and Outro: Living Kills - The Noise

Ep. 109 Do You Talk To Yourself? Science Says You're a Genius

Get ready for another laugh-out-loud ride with Danny, James, Jake, and Rachel! We are back in the studio for Episode 109, and things are getting wonderfully weird and incredibly embarrassing. First up in "Have You Heard?", Jake introduces us to a truly bizarre medical phenomenon from Hong Kong. A woman strained so hard on the toilet that she triggered Transient Global Amnesia, completely wiping the last 10 years of her memory for eight hours. We break down the dangers of the "Valsalva maneuver" and why your bathroom breaks should come with a hazard warning. In "Confessionals," James brings the heat with two utterly mortifying stories.• A listener tries to borrow their boyfriend's expensive charcoal face mask, only to discover after scrubbing it into their pores that it was actually the cremated ashes of his childhood hamster, Barnaby.• A woman fresh out of the bath panics and spends ten minutes aggressively beating what she thinks is a giant spider on her towel, before realizing it was just her own untrimmed pubic hair poking through a hole. We dive into the biological gutter for "Rachel's Furry Box" to ask: have you ever secretly enjoyed smelling your own fart?. The crew debates the safety of personal scents, the deadly lingering of a "shower fart," and James reveals his sinister trick of asking friends if they "smell popcorn" just as he lets one rip. In "Boys Catch Yourselves On," Rachel tackles the bizarre phenomenon of men forgetting important dates like birthdays and anniversaries. The boys defend their terrible memories by citing spontaneous "panic gifts," while Rachel points out the audacity of men who can remember random football stats from years ago but forget to book an anniversary dinner. Danny dives into the psychological depths for "What the FAQ?" to ask: is it normal to talk to yourself?. He explains how 96% of adults have an internal monologue, why speaking out loud is actually a sign of high intelligence and emotional regulation, and how "distanced self-talk" can help reduce anxiety. Finally, we update our Spotify playlist, "The Middlers Soundtrack," with some fresh tracks. This week we add "Human Nature" by Michael Jackson, "Pictures of You" by Drugdealer feat. Kate Bollinger, "Love Me Not" by Ravyn Lenae, and "The Mickey Dam" by Damien Dempsey. FOLLOW AND HIT THE BELL NOTIFICATION TO NEVER MISS AN EPISODE! 📧 Want to contact us?Mail: team@meetinthemiddlepod.comInstagram: @podcast.meetinthemiddle 🎵 Intro and Outro: Living Kills - The Noise

Ep. 108 Japan’s Breeding Visa & The Plague Rat

The crew is back for another round of absolute mayhem! We kick things off in "Have You Heard?" where Jake investigates a wild rumor about "breeding visas" in Japan. While that might be fake news, the real story is just as bizarre: the Japanese government is literally subsidizing Tinder Gold and matchmaking apps to fight the loneliness epidemic. Danny is ready to sign up for government-funded Grinder, while James and Rachel feel a bit "pimped out" by the idea of state-sponsored flirting. In "Confessionals," we hear two of the most skin-crawling stories in podcast history. First, a woman tries to rescue a "hairless kitten" in an alleyway, only to have the vet lock the door and call animal control because she’s been cuddling a mange-ridden city rat all night. Then, a guy tries to be the hero at a steakhouse by performing the Heimlich maneuver on an elderly woman, only to realize she wasn't choking—he just physically launched her 3,000-pound dentures across the restaurant and into an industrial bin. "Rachel's Furry Box" gets a makeover this week! Danny has officially handed over the reigns (and the ginger hair), and we now have "Rachel's Furry Purse." It's portable, it's blonde, and it’s asking the big questions: Would you want to be famous? Jake wants the protection, Danny wants the red carpet, and James thinks Jake would end up as a Swedish recluse living in a castle with a bunch of cats. For "Boys Catch Yourself On," Rachel is calling out the "Hard Man" aesthetic. Why do men pose in photos like they’ve just been denied bail or are selling oregano behind a shop? From the shadow boxing in club toilets to the mysterious "gang signs," she wants to know why guys can't just smile for once. Finally, in "What the FAQ?", Danny is breaking down the anatomy of the fist. Why do our fingers look like a "mismatched boy band" that somehow transforms into a "perfect wall of violence" when you clench them? It’s the science of the scrap, and things get weirdly technical. FOLLOW AND HIT THE BELL NOTIFICATION TO NEVER MISS AN EPISODE! 📧 Want to contact us?Mail: team@meetinthemiddlepod.comInstagram: @podcast.meetinthemiddle 🎵 Intro and Outro: Living Kills - The Noise #MeetInTheMiddle #Podcast #IrishHumour #BritishHumour #ComedyPodcast #JapanDating #TinderGold #RatStory #HeimlichManeuver #Fame #DatingApps #Banter