Stained into Consciousness with Ruj the Cursed Rug (Jorin Garguilo)

Hells Half Acre Farmstead with Farmer Brian Pontiac (Scott Piebenga)

You have pulled the Farmer, which represents industrial reapers, endless chores, and market stalls! You are salt of the earth and pepper of the underworld. Demons and devils and everything in between line up in droves to enjoy your horrid crops (only the best of the worst for the worst folks around!) Naturally, it's hard work keeping Hell fed, and your work is often underappreciated. Don't let any human or bully plants boss you around - you've got the toughest most calloused hands in this realm. This is a reminder to keep toiling and trudging, it only makes your cornucopia that much more disgusting! So sharpen up that pitchfork, chomp on some rat knuckles, and pop some barbed wire berries into your cornhole with devil tormentor Art Brimstone, Failed Comedian Ian Hamilton, and horrifying horticulturist Scott Piebenga! Credits Failed Comedian Ian Hamilton: Ian Hamilton Art Brimstone: Art Stone Brian Pontiac: Scott Piebenga Theme Music: Sam Winters [https://www.samwintersmusic.com/] Artwork: Hannah Bess Ross [https://www.instagram.com/hannahbessross/] Hell Soundscape: @MichaelGhelfiStudios [https://michaelghelfistudios.com/] Audio Engineer: Rick Riggs @Handwritten Recording [http://www.handwrittenrecording.com/] Editor: Art Stone Producers: Ian Hamilton & Art Stone Associate Producer: Natalie O'Sullivan Hamilton [https://natalieosullivan.com/] Support the show by following us wherever the hell we are: linktr.ee/netherregionpod [https://linktr.ee/netherregionpod]

The Intern Responsible for Low-Rise Jeans with Bobby Le Bobby (Devin Henderson)

You have pulled the Fashion Intern, which represents coffee runs, runways, and raw denim sleep jeans! Slay! Sashay! Shantay you stay in eternal damnation! You are always dressed to impress...unfortunately you are cursed to a lifetime of striving to impress anyone and everyone. A 2.5-inch zipper doesn't begin to cover the amount of busy work piled onto your plate. Even when you're doing all the thinking for high-end designers, it doesn't stop you from crafting your own creations! And it shouldn't! You've got the world on a string (thread…bobbin…spool…ANYWAY!) It's too bad no one on Earth cared much for your unique designs, but not everyone can be a trendsetter! Maybe you've just got one hell of a sense of style. The Devil does indeed wear Prada, but you can always party in your birthday suit with devil tormentor Art Brimstone, Failed Comedian Ian Hamilton, and haute couture hellion Devin Henderson! Credits Failed Comedian Ian Hamilton: Ian Hamilton Art Brimstone: Art Stone Bobby Le Bobby: Devin Henderson [https://www.instagram.com/hevindenderson/] Theme Music: Sam Winters [https://www.samwintersmusic.com/] Artwork: Hannah Bess Ross [https://www.instagram.com/hannahbessross/] Hell Soundscape: @MichaelGhelfiStudios [https://michaelghelfistudios.com/] Audio Engineer: Rick Riggs @Handwritten Recording [http://www.handwrittenrecording.com/] Editor: Art Stone Producers: Ian Hamilton & Art Stone Associate Producer: Natalie O'Sullivan Hamilton [https://natalieosullivan.com/] Support the show by following us wherever the hell we are: linktr.ee/netherregionpod [https://linktr.ee/netherregionpod]

Stained into Consciousness with Ruj the Cursed Rug (Jorin Garguilo)

You have pulled the Rug, a reminder that you aren't a total pushover even though you let people walk all over you! Don't wring out your tassels in shame. You're a testament to how much patience a floor mat can practice, considering the variety of gross happenings that have occured on you. You tend to bring out the worst in people, but at least you get to watch whatever is on TV while it's happening! Just remember that your variety of stains only makes you a tapestry of many colors and stories. You reject that typical beige-gray lifestyle in favor of being a rainbow of dirt and filth...but a rainbow nonetheless! So book your flight to Florida, commit some light onanism, and invite Pauly Shore to roll up with devil tormentor Art Brimstone, Failed Comedian Ian Hamilton, and low-pile layabout John Garguilo! Credits Failed Comedian Ian Hamilton: Ian Hamilton Art Brimstone: Art Stone Ruj the Cursed Rug: Jorin Garguilo [https://www.instagram.com/buoyfish/] Theme Music: Sam Winters [https://www.samwintersmusic.com/] Artwork: Hannah Bess Ross [https://www.instagram.com/hannahbessross/] Hell Soundscape: @MichaelGhelfiStudios [https://michaelghelfistudios.com/] Audio Engineer: Rick Riggs @Handwritten Recording [http://www.handwrittenrecording.com/] Editor: Art Stone Producers: Ian Hamilton & Art Stone Associate Producer: Natalie O'Sullivan Hamilton [https://natalieosullivan.com/] Support the show by following us wherever the hell we are: linktr.ee/netherregionpod [https://linktr.ee/netherregionpod]

Intergalactic Real Estate with Planetary Real Estate Agent Snorky (Michelle Lerch)

You have pulled the Alien, which represents continued education, SoCal surf fashion, and force choking! You're quite an extraverted extraterrestrial, making everyone feel appreciated with your amazing ability to read everyone's mind. You're incredible at assimilating to life (death!) and the creatures in Earth's Hell, even though you're light years beyond them in intelligence! You love to live, laugh, learn about other cultures and revel in their humor - turns out joke probing feels the same in every galaxy! Even though you may be a model specimen (see: JCPenny's catalog), not everything about you seamlessly blends in (see: knife hand). So get your library card and your real estate license and rent out the universe with devil tormentor Art Brimstone, Failed Comedian Ian Hamilton, and intergalactic gal Michelle Lerch! Credits Failed Comedian Ian Hamilton: Ian Hamilton Art Brimstone: Art Stone Snorky: Michelle Lerch [https://www.instagram.com/mlerchsop/] Theme Music: Sam Winters [https://www.samwintersmusic.com/] Artwork: Hannah Bess Ross [https://www.instagram.com/hannahbessross/] Hell Soundscape: @MichaelGhelfiStudios [https://michaelghelfistudios.com/] Audio Engineer: Rick Riggs @Handwritten Recording [http://www.handwrittenrecording.com/] Editor: Art Stone Producers: Ian Hamilton & Art Stone Associate Producer: Natalie O'Sullivan Hamilton [https://natalieosullivan.com/] Support the show by following us wherever the hell we are: linktr.ee/netherregionpod [https://linktr.ee/netherregionpod]

Parenting Tips for the Hellish Strepfather with Ty Dewie the Imp (Scoochie Boochie)

You have pulled The Imp (Reversed), which represents teenage angst, human studies, and techno most foul! Listener, beware - let this card be a warning to you! You are raving down the wrong road and there's no amount of post-nut clarity or cool as hell drugs that can draw you back into the boiling hot embrace of eternal darkness. And don't get it twisted: censoring your swears, doing close-up magic, and making dirty song parodies isn't going to bring you into your mentor's good graces! Even if he's not your real dad, you should look to the ranks above you, e.g. a little stinker, for inspiration. You're so close to earning all 666 of those hell college credits, so stick to the syllabus for your impternship and keep answering those emails for devil tormentor Art Brimstone, Failed Comedian Ian Hamilton, and world's best strepson Scoochie Boochie! Credits Failed Comedian Ian Hamilton: Ian Hamilton Art Brimstone: Art Stone Ty Dewie the Imp: Scoochie Boochie [https://www.instagram.com/scoochie_boochie/] Theme Music: Sam Winters [https://www.samwintersmusic.com/] Artwork: Hannah Bess Ross [https://www.instagram.com/hannahbessross/] Hell Soundscape: @MichaelGhelfiStudios [https://michaelghelfistudios.com/] Audio Engineer: Rick Riggs @Handwritten Recording [http://www.handwrittenrecording.com/] Editor: Art Stone Producers: Ian Hamilton & Art Stone Associate Producer: Natalie O'Sullivan Hamilton [https://natalieosullivan.com/] Support the show by following us wherever the hell we are: linktr.ee/netherregionpod [https://linktr.ee/netherregionpod]