Keeping up with the Kartel

7. Reunion Day, Heatwave Delirium & The Worst Day of Our Lives

This week on No Country for Hot Girls, it’s finally Reunion Day. After weeks of build-up, speculation and emotional investment, we’re gathering with fellow Bravo obsessives to watch the Summer House reunion and, naturally, treating it like a major cultural event. Before the drama kicks off, we discuss the London heatwave (one of us is thriving, the other is convinced we’re heading towards climate apocalypse), Kylie Minogue’s excellent new documentary, and why music docs always seem to hit harder than any film ever could. We also revisit what we’ve officially named The Worst Day of Our Lives™: a lockdown-era tale involving heartbreak, a rowing boat in Dulwich Park, hailstones, Boursin, and an emotionally devastating viewing of Supersonic. Plus: Emily in Paris, Taylor Swift in the Cotswolds, Dave Franco’s questionable hydration choices, and a completely unnecessary debate about whether you’d eat your best friend on a desert island. The episode finishes with a live dispatch from reunion night itself, complete with wine, guacamole, Bravo superfans and a toast to the hardest-working man in reality TV: Andy Cohen. As ever, it’s equal parts pop culture, friendship, chaos and nonsense. Enjoy. Get full access to No Country For Hot Girls at julianapiskorz.substack.com/subscribe [https://julianapiskorz.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Keeping up with the Kartel

Hello. You’ve reached No Country for Hot Girls. We can’t come to the phone right now because we’re busy turning minor observations into full-scale investigations. This week: heatwave behaviour, the politics of complaining, why living in London is basically a communal experience, and whether friendship is actually the secret to life. We also get into celebrity chaos, relationship icks, reality TV updates, questionable internet research methods, and an unnecessarily detailed deep dive into The Strokes’ drama. Expect conspiracies, culture, gossip, bad takes, strong opinions, and several moments that probably should’ve stayed in the group chat. Please leave a message after the tone. Get full access to No Country For Hot Girls at julianapiskorz.substack.com/subscribe [https://julianapiskorz.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

ADHD Meds, Birkin Bags and the Podcast that almost never was

You may spot the occasional audio quirk this week. We had a minor technical mishap after recording and ended up doing some unexpected post-production heroics, but the episode survived. Inside this week: impossible London journeys, Lime bike politics, sobriety updates, ADHD revelations, wedding dress shopping, Kylie Jenner’s Birkin obsession, Olivia Rodrigo discourse, Cannes chaos, Eurovision humiliation and our usual completely unfounded opinions in between. Leave a message after the tone. Get full access to No Country For Hot Girls at julianapiskorz.substack.com/subscribe [https://julianapiskorz.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

4. Harry Potter Reboot, No Thanks

This week on Country for Hot Girls we attempt to recover from a cursed podcast recording fiasco (RIP to the lost Romantasy segment), and instead spiral into: wedding plus-one politics, Lena Dunham and Adam Driver lore, the aggressively unnecessary Harry Potter reboot, and why everyone is furious about Boston accents in Christopher Nolan’s The Odyssey. There’s also Yung Lean’s incredible new music video, nostalgic Britney chat, Greek mythology tangents, and an important discussion about butterbeer. A very chaotic episode. As always. Get full access to No Country For Hot Girls at julianapiskorz.substack.com/subscribe [https://julianapiskorz.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

3. Met Gala Controversy, Zoe Kravitz's engagement and bad broccoli jokes

It’s episode three and Hannah’s back (phew)! We’re debriefing bank holiday carnage, hot Pilates bodily fluids, and the ongoing battle between sobriety and two bottles of natural wine. We spiral through Met Gala controversy, billionaire chaos, and why we’re suddenly pro-smoking again (don’t quote us on that). There’s also a deep dive into parasocial crushes, Raya horrors, and the very real consequences of a missSpelt broccoli joke. Plus: Pinterest as self-care, toxic workplace rumours in podcast land, and the existential injustice of Gen Z being banned from cigarettes. Recommendations from the episode:Read Before the Coffee Gets Coldhttps://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/44421460-before-the-coffee-gets-cold [https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/44421460-before-the-coffee-gets-cold] Buy Fun and Gameshttps://harpercollins.co.uk/products/fun-and-games-john-patrick-mchugh?variant=41459518177358 [https://harpercollins.co.uk/products/fun-and-games-john-patrick-mchugh?variant=41459518177358] Buy bedding you can’t affordhttps://under-under.eu/collections/bed-linen [https://under-under.eu/collections/bed-linen] Stick detox patches on your feet and hope for the besthttps://wholefoodsbox.co.uk/products/bodytox-detox-foot-patches-10s [https://wholefoodsbox.co.uk/products/bodytox-detox-foot-patches-10s] Pop culture, mild breakdowns, and absolutely no fact-checking — just how we like it. Get full access to No Country For Hot Girls at julianapiskorz.substack.com/subscribe [https://julianapiskorz.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]