63 | Your “Bad Habits” Aren’t Bad: Why You Numb and What to Do Instead

63 | Your “Bad Habits” Aren’t Bad: Why You Numb and What to Do Instead

Half the time, you don't even clock that you're doing it. You tell yourself you're done scrolling, and somehow it's twenty minutes later. You pour the third glass of wine you didn't really want. You stand in the kitchen eating something you're not even hungry for. And the whole time, there's this quiet voice going, why can't I just stop? We've been taught to call these things bad habits, and to treat them like proof that we're undisciplined, or weak, or broken in some way we have to fix. But underneath almost every so-called bad habit is something much more human. A feeling you were never taught how to sit with, and a behavior that learned, somewhere along the way, to turn the volume down on it. In this week's episode, I'm getting into numbing. What it actually is, why we reach for it and why your bad habits were never bad in the first place. And what to do instead that doesn't involve forcing your way through, because we know that never holds. If you've ever quit the thing and somehow felt worse instead of better, or found yourself stuck in a loop where the numbing creates the exact feeling you're then trying to numb, this one is for you. Because the thing you keep calling a bad habit is usually a coping strategy that's been doing its job all along. And once you can see it that way, you stop fighting yourself and start actually freeing yourself. What You'll Hear: * What numbing actually is, and why it's so different from the "bad habit" label you've been beating yourself up with. * The numbing that hides in plain sight for high-functioning women, like busyness, over-preparing, over-functioning, and even wellness. * Four honest ways to tell whether you're truly enjoying something or quietly numbing with it. * Why our culture hands out trophies for some kinds of numbing and shames you for the rest. * What we're really avoiding when we reach, and why so many of us were never given permission to feel it. * Simple, doable tools for the moment the urge hits, including riding the wave and the hungry, angry, lonely, tired check. * Why you sometimes feel worse right after you stop, and how to break the loop that feeds itself, one pause at a time. Resources and Links: * Want to work together 1:1? Click here [https://app.greminders.com/c/schedulewithallyrose/connectioncall-direct] to book your Connection Call * Apply to be coached on the podcast: shiftyourstorypodcast.com [http://shiftyourstorypodcast.com/] * Hang out with me on Instagram [https://instagram.com/theallyrose] and Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theallyrose] * Join Mindshifts & Momentum: therootedwellnesscollective.com/mindshifts [https://therootedwellnesscollective.com/mindshifts] Your Next Steps: Subscribe, rate, and leave a review so more women can find this conversation. And if someone came to mind while you were listening, someone who keeps calling a coping strategy a bad habit and beating herself up over it, send her this episode. 🎙️ The Shift Your Story Podcast © 2026 Ally Rose | All Rights Reserved 💌 Contact: ally@therootedwellnesscollective.com ✨ Want to be coached on the podcast? Apply here [https://forms.gle/NqRQ7LH4ioPggJwZ9] 🫶🏾 Let’s connect: Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/theallyrose/] | Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theallyrose/] | Website [https://shiftyourstorypodcast.com/] Disclaimer: The information shared on this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to diagnose, treat, or cure any condition, nor does it constitute a therapeutic relationship. All views expressed are my own. You should always consult with your own medical, mental health, legal, and financial professionals before making any decisions.

62 | The Real Reason Your Business Feels So Heavy: A Hypnocoaching Session with Carrie

Business self-sabotage is extra maddening because half the time, you are painfully aware of what you are doing while you are doing it.  You open the laptop, stare at the post, rewrite the caption seventeen times, convince yourself the offer is not clear enough yet, decide maybe the whole business needs to be reworked, and somehow end up doing everything except the one thing that would actually let people see you.  And the worst part is, you can usually explain all of it. But underneath all of that, there is often a much older question running the show: is it actually safe for me to be seen? In this week’s episode, I'm coaching Carrie, who came in because building her business felt heavier than she expected.  She wanted to help women through life transitions, especially the messy, lonely, identity-shaking ones she had lived through herself.  She had the lived experience, the heart for the work, and the desire to create something meaningful. But when it came time to put herself out there, she started the spiral of self-sabotage.  If you have ever wondered why the business you want can also feel like the thing you keep avoiding, this episode will likely resonate.  Because sometimes the thing you keep calling inconsistency is actually a younger part of you still trying to protect you from the exact kind of exposure your next chapter requires. What You’ll Hear: * Why building a business can feel emotionally loaded even when you deeply want it. * How visibility can bring up old fears around judgment, conflict, rejection, or being too much. * How the “good one,” the “easy one,” or the “peacekeeper” can become the adult who is terrified to take up space. * What it looks like to trace a business block back to the part of you that learned to hide. * Why your next level may require more safety in your body, not just more strategy in your business. Resources and Links: * Click here [https://therootedwellnesscollective.com/mindshifts] to join us in Mindsfhits & Momentum * Want to work together 1:1? Click here [https://app.greminders.com/c/schedulewithallyrose/connectioncall-direct] to book your Connection Call * Apply to be coached on the podcast: shiftyourstorypodcast.com [http://shiftyourstorypodcast.com/] * Hang out with me on Instagram [https://instagram.com/theallyrose] and Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theallyrose] Your Next Steps: Subscribe, rate, and leave a review so more people can find this conversation. And if someone came to mind while you were listening, someone who keeps blaming themselves for hiding from the thing they actually want, send them this episode. 🎙️ The Shift Your Story Podcast © 2026 Ally Rose | All Rights Reserved 💌 Contact: ally@therootedwellnesscollective.com ✨ Want to be coached on the podcast? Apply here [https://forms.gle/NqRQ7LH4ioPggJwZ9] 🫶🏾 Let’s connect: Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/theallyrose/] | Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theallyrose/] | Website [https://shiftyourstorypodcast.com/] Disclaimer: The information shared on this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to diagnose, treat, or cure any condition, nor does it constitute a therapeutic relationship. All views expressed are my own. You should always consult with your own medical, mental health, legal, and financial professionals before making any decisions.

61 | The One Small Change Method: The Missing Piece for When Trying Harder Stops Working

“I feel like I’ve tried everything.” If you’ve ever said that sentence, you know the exhaustion underneath it. By that point, you’ve probably read the books, listened to the podcasts, tried the routines, downloaded the apps, deleted the apps, re-downloaded the apps, bought the planner, journaled the childhood wound, tracked the habit, abandoned the habit, and restarted the habit more times than you want to admit. And you’re not at the beginning of your awareness journey. You can probably name the pattern. You can explain where it came from. You can describe your nervous system response. You may even help other people see their patterns clearly, and still, you feel stuck. This week, I’m talking about why the answer may not be doing more, trying harder, or building another dramatic life overhaul. It might be one small change. One small shift your real life can actually hold. One small promise you can actually keep. One degree in a new direction that may not look dramatic in the moment, but over time changes the entire destination. I’m also walking you through the One Small Change Method and the structure of Mindshifts & Momentum, my new membership for deeply self-aware, high-functioning women who know what to do to build the life they want, but are tired of fighting themselves to do it. If you’ve tried everything and still feel stuck, this episode will meet you right there. What You’ll Learn: * Why “I’ve tried everything” is often a sign that you need a different approach, not more information. * Why lasting change usually happens in smaller moments after the motivation wears off. * How the one-degree airplane shift explains subconscious change over time. * Why small promises rebuild self-trust more effectively than giant declarations. * What the One Small Change Method looks like in real life. * What’s included inside Mindshifts & Momentum and how the membership is designed to support awareness, action, subconscious work, and accountability. Resources and Links: * Join Mindshifts & Momentum: therootedwellnesscollective.com/mindshifts [https://therootedwellnesscollective.com/mindshifts] * Enroll by June 30 to receive founding member pricing at $47/month for as long as you remain active, plus a custom hypnosis audio tailored to your specific focus. * Want to work together 1:1? Click here [https://app.greminders.com/c/schedulewithallyrose/connectioncall-direct] to book your Connection Call * Apply to be coached on the podcast: shiftyourstorypodcast.com [http://shiftyourstorypodcast.com/] * Hang out with me on Instagram [https://instagram.com/theallyrose] and Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theallyrose] Your Next Steps: Subscribe, rate, and leave a review so more people can find this conversation. And if you know someone who keeps saying, “I’ve tried everything,” but still feels stuck in the same pattern, send them this episode. They may not need another overhaul, they may just need one small change. 🎙️ The Shift Your Story Podcast © 2026 Ally Rose | All Rights Reserved 💌 Contact: ally@therootedwellnesscollective.com ✨ Want to be coached on the podcast? Apply here [https://forms.gle/NqRQ7LH4ioPggJwZ9] 🫶🏾 Let’s connect: Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/theallyrose/] | Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theallyrose/] | Website [https://shiftyourstorypodcast.com/] Disclaimer: The information shared on this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to diagnose, treat, or cure any condition, nor does it constitute a therapeutic relationship. All views expressed are my own. You should always consult with your own medical, mental health, legal, and financial professionals before making any decisions.

60 | Stopping the Shame Spiral That Keeps the Pattern Alive: How to Move From Knowing Better to Doing Better

You know what is almost more annoying than the pattern itself? Knowing exactly what you are doing while you are doing it. You can be sitting there watching yourself say yes when you meant no. You can feel the resentment forming before the sentence is even finished, and somehow the words “of course, no problem” still come out of your mouth. You can know you need to look at the money, open the invoice, check the account, send the price, and somehow suddenly cleaning out your screenshots feels urgent. That is the specific shame we are talking about in this episode. Not the shame of not knowing, the shame of knowing and still watching yourself reach for the same old thing. Because at a certain point, it is not “I wish I understood this pattern.” It becomes, “I cannot believe I am still doing this after all the work I have done.” That is the piece that can feel so brutal. In this episode, we are talking about why knowing better does not automatically mean doing better, why your body may still choose the familiar thing even when your mind knows the healthier thing, and why attacking yourself after the pattern usually just keeps you stuck in it longer. We also talk about the question that changes the whole conversation from shame to curiosity. What You’ll Hear In This Episode: * Why the most painful part is not always the pattern, but the shame of still having the pattern. * Why being self-aware can sometimes make everything feel worse before it feels freeing. * Why your mind can understand something long before your body feels safe enough to choose differently. * How shame turns one repeated pattern into a whole identity you start using against yourself. * Why “I know better, so I should do better” can become a weapon instead of a wake-up call. * How to stop making the old pattern the end of the story. * Why momentum is not about never falling into the old thing again, but learning how to come back faster. Resources and Links * Join the Mindshifts & Momentum waitlist: https://therootedwellnesscollective.com/mindshifts [https://therootedwellnesscollective.com/mindshifts] * Want to work together 1:1? Click here [https://app.greminders.com/c/schedulewithallyrose/connectioncall-direct] to book your Connection Call * Apply to be coached on the podcast: shiftyourstorypodcast.com [http://shiftyourstorypodcast.com/] * Hang out with me on Instagram [https://instagram.com/theallyrose] and Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theallyrose] Your Next Steps: Subscribe, rate, and leave a review so more people can find this conversation. And if this episode made you think of someone who knows exactly what she is doing and is still privately beating herself up for doing it, send it to her. 🎙️ The Shift Your Story Podcast © 2026 Ally Rose | All Rights Reserved 💌 Contact: ally@therootedwellnesscollective.com ✨ Want to be coached on the podcast? Apply here [https://forms.gle/NqRQ7LH4ioPggJwZ9] 🫶🏾 Let’s connect: Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/theallyrose/] | Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theallyrose/] | Website [https://shiftyourstorypodcast.com/] Disclaimer: The information shared on this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to diagnose, treat, or cure any condition, nor does it constitute a therapeutic relationship. All views expressed are my own. You should always consult with your own medical, mental health, legal, and financial professionals before making any decisions.

59 | Your 45-Step Plan Is Keeping You Stuck: Why More Steps Don't Always Create More Change

You know the plan. The one where you decide that starting Monday, you’re going to wake up earlier, drink more water, journal, meditate, walk, stop scrolling, eat more protein, fix your finances, clean your house, finally get consistent, launch the thing, and somehow become a completely different person by Thursday afternoon. No big deal, right? The problem isn’t that you want more for your life, it’s that sometimes the massive plan you created to “fix everything” becomes the very thing keeping you stuck. Because when the plan is too big, too rigid, and too loaded with pressure, one missed step can turn into a full shame spiral. And suddenly you’re not just skipping the walk or avoiding the spreadsheet or saving the post to drafts. You’re deciding, once again, that you can’t trust yourself. In this episode, I’m talking about why your 45-step plan may be keeping you stuck, why your subconscious mind doesn’t trust intensity, and why one small repeatable shift can create more momentum than another dramatic life overhaul ever could. If you’ve ever made the big plan, fallen off, blamed yourself, and promised to start over next Monday, this episode will hit. What You’ll Learn: * Why big plans feel so good at the beginning, even when they don’t create follow-through. * How the 45-step plan can quietly become a shame machine. * Why your subconscious mind trusts repetition more than intensity. * How one small promise can start rebuilding self-trust. * Why tiny shifts can interrupt patterns like perfectionism, people-pleasing, avoidance, overthinking, and money shame. Resources and Links * Join the Mindshifts & Momentum waitlist: https://therootedwellnesscollective.com/mindshifts [https://therootedwellnesscollective.com/mindshifts] * Want to work together 1:1? Click here [https://app.greminders.com/c/schedulewithallyrose/connectioncall-direct] to book your Connection Call * Apply to be coached on the podcast: shiftyourstorypodcast.com [http://shiftyourstorypodcast.com/] * Hang out with me on Instagram [https://instagram.com/theallyrose] and Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theallyrose] Your Next Steps: Subscribe, rate, and leave a review so more people can find this conversation.  And if you know someone who keeps making the big plan, falling off, and blaming themselves for being inconsistent, forward this episode to them. 🎙️ The Shift Your Story Podcast © 2026 Ally Rose | All Rights Reserved 💌 Contact: ally@therootedwellnesscollective.com ✨ Want to be coached on the podcast? Apply here [https://forms.gle/NqRQ7LH4ioPggJwZ9] 🫶🏾 Let’s connect: Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/theallyrose/] | Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theallyrose/] | Website [https://shiftyourstorypodcast.com/] Disclaimer: The information shared on this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to diagnose, treat, or cure any condition, nor does it constitute a therapeutic relationship. All views expressed are my own. You should always consult with your own medical, mental health, legal, and financial professionals before making any decisions.