34. 5 Ways to Regulate When Your Nervous System Gets Hijacked

35. Get Your Alignment Checked

The Importance of Alignment in Life Alignment in life is a fundamental aspect that significantly influences our overall well-being. When we refer to alignment, we mean the harmony between our values, beliefs, actions, and the people and situations we engage with. Achieving this alignment is crucial for maintaining peace, clarity, and authenticity in our lives. In this episode of Soul Wide Open, host Michelle Renee delves into the concept of alignment and what it truly means in our lives. Drawing an analogy between life and the alignment of a car, Michelle explores how being out of alignment can cause us to veer off course, just like a misaligned vehicle. She shares personal reflections on her current stage of life, emphasizing the importance of recognizing and letting go of things that don't serve our alignment. Tune in to discover how understanding alignment can lead to greater clarity and direction in your journey. Talking Points: 00:00:10 - What is Alignment? 00:02:00 - Impact of Misalignment in Life 00:03:47 - Ignoring Signs of Misalignment 00:05:46 - Consequences of Staying Out of Alignment 00:07:02 - Wear and Tear from Misalignment 00:09:01 - Personal Relationship Misalignment 00:10:17 - Facing Reality in Relationships 00:12:03 - Taking Your Vehicle to the Shop 00:14:01 - Freedom from Realignment 00:17:26 - Honesty and Raw Self-Reflection 00:20:08 - Living Authentically 00:24:05 - Evaluating Your Relationships 00:25:00 - Top Three Ways to Check Alignment 00:26:05 - Feeling Expanded or Diminished 00:27:00 - Who Do You Become Around Others? 00:30:05 - Evaluating Current Situations 00:31:10 - Clearing the Smoke of Chemistry 00:33:08 - Anchoring in Reality vs. Fantasy 00:34:28 - Final Thoughts and Encouragement Quotes: "We get snagged, tangled up, entangled, whatever you want to call it, in situations, people, relationships, jobs even, that are so out of alignment." "Sometimes when things change and we ignore that change and we hang in there... we end up getting further and further and further away from ourselves." "What are you still allowing in your life over and over and over that is so far out of alignment with who you are and what your values are?" "There's a big difference between giving up and being real." "Abandoning yourself just to make other people happy... it's not good. That's not healthy." "If it's in alignment, it'll be totally authentic. If it's not in alignment, you become an Academy Award winning actor." "When you're in alignment, that brings peace, that brings clarity, that brings total authenticity and living a life that is with your soul completely wide open." "Am I anchored in what is, or am I anchored in what I hope for it to become?" Stay Connected: Don't miss out on more inspiring conversations and stories on the Soul Wide Open podcast. Subscribe now and join us on this journey of healing, growth, and living with your soul wide open. Connect with Michelle: My Website [https://michelle-renee.com] https://michelle-renee.com Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/_michellerenee_]: https://www.instagram.com/_michellerenee_ TikTok [https://www.tiktok.com/@themichellerenee] https://www.tiktok.com/@themichellerenee VERB Media Group [https://verbmediagroup.com/] https://verbmediagroup.com/ Useful Resources: Order my #1 Best -Selling Memoir Nine Days on Amazon [https://amzn.to/4acIkt1] https://amzn.to/4acIkt1 Soul Wide Open Podcast On Spotify [https://spoti.fi/49lrveA] https://spoti.fi/49lrveA Join the Soul Wide Open FB Group [http://www.facebook.com/groups/soulwideopen] http://www.facebook.com/groups/soulwideopen Watch our CBS/Paramount Plus Special [https://www.cbs.com/shows/video/3I6R18rj_blqVVaBkwyyO901NuyQUKZ_/] https://www.cbs.com/shows/video/3I6R18rj_blqVVaBkwyyO901NuyQUKZ

34. 5 Ways to Regulate When Your Nervous System Gets Hijacked

If you've ever felt hijacked by your past… this one is for you. When confronted with a trauma response, one of the most effective strategies for regaining control and alleviating overwhelming emotions is to acknowledge and name your feelings. This process involves recognizing what is happening within you and articulating it, which can significantly diminish the emotional charge associated with those feelings. In this episode of Soul Wide Open, host Michelle Renee shares what really happens when something cracks open a wound from childhood and your nervous system gets hijacked. She speaks candidly about the inner tape that still plays sometimes… the voice that says, "You'll never be anything. You ruin everything. Maybe your father was right." This isn't theory. It's her lived experience. Drawing from a recent personal incident where a technical glitch affected her business, Michelle shares her emotional journey of confronting feelings of inadequacy and the instinctual responses that arise when things go wrong. She emphasizes the importance of recognizing these triggers and offers insights on how to navigate them, encouraging listeners to break free from self-doubt and cultivate resilience. She walks through the five most important things to do when a trigger activates old trauma wiring — when your body floods, your mind spirals, and the "tape" from childhood starts playing on repeat. This is about nervous system repair. This is about interrupting inherited shame. This is about becoming the safe adult you never had. And the bonus? It may be the hardest one of all. 00:00:55 - A Glitch in the Metrix 00:02:09 - Emotional Impact and Childhood Trauma 00:03:48 - Immediate Response to Emotional Triggers 00:05:04 - Choosing Positive Actions Over Negative Spirals 00:06:10 - Finding Joy in Small Moments 00:07:02 - Engaging in Self-Care Activities 00:08:06 - Resisting Negative Self-Talk 00:09:00 - Overthinking and Self-Doubt 00:10:02 - Top Five Strategies to Combat Negative Self-Talk 00:11:10 - Strategy 1: Naming the Trauma Response 00:12:13 - Strategy 2: Regulating Your Body 00:13:39 - Strategy 3: Separating the Voices 00:15:15 - Strategy 4: Engaging with the Inner Child 00:17:03 - Strategy 5: Anchoring in Present Evidence 00:20:07 - Metaphor of Life as an Olympic Performance 00:21:00 - Self-Compassion and Reassurance 00:24:06 - Bonus Strategy: Calling a Friend 00:27:02 - The Importance of Supportive Friends 00:30:04 - Allowing Yourself to Feel and Process 00:31:07 - Recap of Strategies and Final Thoughts Quotes: "Here comes my dad's voice: you're a POS, you're never gonna be anything, or you can't do anything right." "A lot of times when this hits, we go straight into fatalistic thinking, like everything is ruined." "That is not the voice of the person that you have become up to today until this moment of dysregulation." "Dad's not here. And his voice doesn't get to define us anymore." "You are not a piece of crap. You are not a nobody. You are not the person that's just gonna end up being nothing." "Just know that it's okay to call a friend and say, I'm not okay." "That's just a gift all the way around for both of us." Stay Connected: Don't miss out on more inspiring conversations and stories on the Soul Wide Open podcast. Subscribe now and join us on this journey of healing, growth, and living with your soul wide open. Connect with Michelle: My Website [https://michelle-renee.com] https://michelle-renee.com Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/_michellerenee_]: https://www.instagram.com/_michellerenee_ TikTok [https://www.tiktok.com/@themichellerenee] https://www.tiktok.com/@themichellerenee VERB Media Group [https://verbmediagroup.com/] https://verbmediagroup.com/ Useful Resources: Order my #1 Best -Selling Memoir Nine Days on Amazon [https://amzn.to/4acIkt1] https://amzn.to/4acIkt1 Soul Wide Open Podcast On Spotify [https://spoti.fi/49lrveA] https://spoti.fi/49lrveA Join the Soul Wide Open FB Group [http://www.facebook.com/groups/soulwideopen] http://www.facebook.com/groups/soulwideopen Watch our CBS/Paramount Plus Special [https://www.cbs.com/shows/video/3I6R18rj_blqVVaBkwyyO901NuyQUKZ_/] https://www.cbs.com/shows/video/3I6R18rj_blqVVaBkwyyO901NuyQUKZ_/

33. The Art of Unhiding: 3 Ways To Step Out of the Shadows and Live Fully

Unhiding is a deeply personal journey that involves revealing your true self, both to yourself and to others. It is not about making bold statements or being loud; rather, it is a subtle and often quiet process of self-discovery and acceptance. In this episode of the Soul Wide Open podcast, host Michelle Renee emphasizes that many people may not even realize they are hiding parts of themselves. This concealment can stem from various factors, including shame, fear of judgment, and past trauma. The act of unhiding involves confronting these hidden aspects and embracing them, which can be a daunting task. Michelle describes unhiding as a "quiet revealing" that is both personal and intimate. It requires a level of honesty with oneself that many may find challenging. This honesty is crucial because until we are truthful with ourselves, it becomes difficult to be authentic with others. The journey of unhiding is not about seeking external validation or approval; instead, it is about understanding and accepting who we are at our core. Join her for a heartfelt discussion filled with practical tools and encouragement to live openly and authentically. Talking Points: 00:02:00 - The Art of Unhiding 00:03:03 - Three Top Ways People Hide 00:05:02 - The Cost of Hiding 00:07:01 - Being Agreeable and People-Pleasing 00:10:00 - Putting Yourself First 00:13:05 - Saying No and Protecting Your Energy 00:15:05 - Emotional Loneliness and Resentment 00:16:10 - Hiding Behind Strength and Self-Sufficiency 00:18:10 - Asking for Help 00:20:07 - Vulnerability and Relationships 00:22:05 - Allowing Others to Help 00:23:10 - Replacing "I Don't Need Anyone" with "I Am Allowed to Need" 00:24:20 - Intellectualizing and Over-Spiritualizing Feelings 00:26:16 - Feeling Pain to Heal 00:28:05 - Emotional Numbness and Healing 00:30:03 - Physical Transformation and Feeling Emotions 00:32:02 - Raw Emotion Before Lessons 00:33:06 - The Messiness of Unhiding 00:34:09 - Using AI to Create Music 00:36:08 - The Joy of Unhiding 00:37:11 - Truth Sharing vs. Oversharing 00:38:14 - Encouragement to Unhide Quotes: "Sometimes the right thing for you is not the right thing for somebody else and that's okay." "Stop just being easy and agreeable. It doesn't matter if somebody doesn't like your choice that you're making for yourself, that's on them." "Instead of saying, I don't need anyone, replace that with, I am allowed to need." "I want to bleed. I want to, I want to tend to that wound. I want to feel that pain." "Unhiding is messy. That's how you know it's real." "The moment you stop hiding, you give everyone else permission to come out too." Stay Connected: Don't miss out on more inspiring conversations and stories on the Soul Wide Open podcast. Subscribe now and join us on this journey of healing, growth, and living with your soul wide open. Connect with Michelle: My Website [https://michelle-renee.com] https://michelle-renee.com Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/_michellerenee_]: https://www.instagram.com/_michellerenee_ TikTok [https://www.tiktok.com/@themichellerenee] https://www.tiktok.com/@themichellerenee VERB Media Group [https://verbmediagroup.com/] https://verbmediagroup.com/ Useful Resources: Order my #1 Best -Selling Memoir Nine Days on Amazon [https://amzn.to/4acIkt1] https://amzn.to/4acIkt1 Soul Wide Open Podcast On Spotify [https://spoti.fi/49lrveA] https://spoti.fi/49lrveA Join the Soul Wide Open FB Group [http://www.facebook.com/groups/soulwideopen] http://www.facebook.com/groups/soulwideopen Watch our CBS/Paramount Plus Special [https://www.cbs.com/shows/video/3I6R18rj_blqVVaBkwyyO901NuyQUKZ_/] https://www.cbs.com/shows/video/3I6R18rj_blqVVaBkwyyO901NuyQUKZ_/

32. Collateral Damage: The Impact of the Kidnapping on Our Families (Part 2)

In this Soul Wide Open podcast episode, host Michelle Renee explores the profound impact of open communication and vulnerability on healing relationships, particularly in the context of trauma and family dynamics. She is joined by one of her daughter's kidnappers, Robert Ortiz, for this surprising, unfiltered look into accountability, amends, and a deep dive into uncommon compassion. Their discussions highlight several key aspects that underscore the necessity of these elements in fostering understanding and reconciliation. One of the most poignant moments in the episode occurs when Michelle reflects on their shared backgrounds and experiences of trauma. She emphasizes that, despite their different paths, they have more in common than initially perceived. This acknowledgment of shared experiences creates a foundation for empathy and understanding, which is crucial for healing relationships. By openly communicating their stories, they bridge the gap between their individual experiences and foster a sense of deep human connection. The part two of two series episode includes Robert's sister, Lorena, and underscores the theme of empathy and the profound impact on families on both sides of criminal violent behavior and incarceration. They excavate similarities that exist among individuals, urging listeners to recognize the common threads that unite us all, which leads to greater healing and transformation. Tune in for a moving exploration of resilience, understanding, forgiveness, and the power of uncommon compassion. Conversation Highlights: 01:08 - Hostage Experience and Misunderstandings 03:07 - Family Dynamics and Emotional Struggles 04:46 - FBI Involvement and Family Reactions 06:32 - Struggles with Believing the Crime 07:08 - Courtroom Anger and Misjudgments 09:55 - Impact on Family and Personal Life 11:00 - Ripple Effects of Violent Crime on Families 12:03 - Victim Offender Dialogue Program 15:02 - Writing and Receiving the Letter 17:01 - Profound Impact of Mother's Words 18:59 - Humanity and Forgiveness 20:06 - Divine Inner Voice and Redemption 23:30 - Epic Amends and Vulnerability 26:56 - Family Healing and Reconciliation 32:01 - Life Lessons and Warnings 35:51 - Radical Forgiveness and Honesty 37:05 - Posture of Embrace and Openness 38:58 - Spiritual Groups and San Quentin 41:35 - Gratitude and Final Thoughts Quotes: "Did you ever feel, he abandoned you for the streets, for this other, now what had become his new family?" "When you do wrong, tough lady, you take accountability because all you have is your word." "We're rich in the way that matters is what I say. We're rich in every way that matters the most." "To see the guy who victimized someone's daughter and having my mom meet that mother, there's no word for that." "You could not make that moment up in a million years." "It was just sprinkled with divine dust from start to finish all the way up until right now." "Because we've chosen to focus on the light and not the dark, on love and not hate." "If you're going to keep picking that shovel up, you're going to be far underground, man." "If I don't help these kids in my lived experience, so they don't go through what I went through, then our future's gonna be doomed." "Don't give up on yourself. Don't give up on the dream. Don't give up on what you believe you are being called to do." "Don't give time to the people, places, and things that don't deserve it." "We hope this touches you in a way that makes you understand what it truly, truly means to live your life with your soul wide open, no matter what you have survived." Stay Connected: Don't miss out on more inspiring conversations and stories on the Soul Wide Open podcast. Subscribe now and join us on this journey of healing, growth, and living with your soul wide open. Connect with Michelle: My Website https://michelle-renee.com [https://michelle-renee.com] Instagram: / _michellerenee_ [https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqbk1VVE5HQ3FOSVdJN1RDRXROVHQzWWdPbnh0d3xBQ3Jtc0ttcmdiUEZ5WDlneGl6YXNtSjlvX1RNWEFXcDZsV2ZyZEpPSzU0UU5taGhtdTFUZUQ1X2VzdGNKVkpRZ0dmYkkxeG1kTFlGQllBSTBQcmtyNmlJb0lkbXBFZUhKaWdFYUM3NDBhV3B5N2pkSXp4YzlKaw&q=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.instagram.com%2F_michellerenee_&v=aDICsnToyIY] TikTok / themichellerenee [https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqa05vTDNUNzg4QmNyMXpKN1VERmYzZGs5cUpSQXxBQ3Jtc0tuX2lKU0hRQlhZTzB1STNUbFp2ZmtWUmhEQXdWU1RaSXF3cjRfcUdvQ1BETjZ4dS00UVNTUVVfR3kycjZZTzdBMHhRbUpxYmMzVWlXX1I4clNNTFdCNGg4WUNhQnptMVFCSllFMi1NLWtHVXdxSFNIUQ&q=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tiktok.com%2F%40themichellerenee&v=aDICsnToyIY] VERB Media Group https://verbmediagroup.com/ [https://verbmediagroup.com/] Connect with Robert: Freedom 4 Youth Robert@freedom4youth.org [Robert@freedom4youth.org] Useful Resources: Order my #1 Best -Selling Memoir Nine Days on Amazon https://amzn.to/4acIkt1 [https://amzn.to/4acIkt1] Soul Wide Open Podcast On Spotify https://spoti.fi/49lrveA [https://spoti.fi/49lrveA] Join the Soul Wide Open FB Group / soulwideopen [https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqbkxLTVJBS3ZBTUZSNVFNYWFfQjduSE16czJOQXxBQ3Jtc0tuRi1XNUxVMUIwN21WUUV1ZmJYZ0xJM3J4bnFDN2hSbU03YnZETDJYcHlHSkVGOFZ1VzlpUWh6emJXaUVsSUZjV3lMSk9yZ3JDZTh0czRmRF9GVFVXOXViWkFTREZURnVsVWNadXF0cDE4U3VBQWl4Yw&q=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Fgroups%2Fsoulwideopen&v=aDICsnToyIY]

31. Uncommon Compassion: A Conversation with One of Our Kidnappers - Part 1

In this deeply moving episode of "Soul Wide Open," host Michelle Renee sits down with Robert Ortiz, the man who once broke into her home and held her and her daughter hostage. Together, they explore the profound journey of healing, focusing on the power of compassion and understanding in transforming their lives. The importance of compassion and understanding in the healing process, even after experiencing trauma and violence, is a central theme in the podcast episode featuring Michelle Renee and one of her and her daughters kidnappers, Robert Ortiz. Their conversation highlights how both individuals, despite their vastly different experiences, found a path toward healing through love, empathy, and forgiveness. After receiving a letter from Michelle and her daughter expressing their desire to let go of anger and resentment, he was profoundly impacted. The letter served as a catalyst for his transformation, prompting him to reevaluate his life choices and the man he wanted to become. This moment of compassion from his victims allowed him to step back from his past actions and commit to a path of healing and personal growth. Joining them in this part one of a two-part series is Michelle's brother, Dave, who played a crucial role in supporting her and her daughter throughout their healing process and during the trial. This episode delves into their collective stories, the complexities of forgiveness, and how they are sharing their message of hope and resilience with the world. Tune in for an unforgettable conversation that challenges the boundaries of healing and connection. Conversation Highlights: 00:10 - Introduction and significance of the interview. 02:37 - Robert Ortiz's childhood story. 05:44 - Childhood responsibilities and rebellion. 11:10 - Sense of belonging in crime. 17:23 - Navigating life after parole. 18:36 - Losing control and masculinity. 27:12 - Piece of humanity never left. 28:27 - Dave's Story: Shattered glass 33:51 - Trial and trauma experience. 36:34 - Witness protection and trauma. 42:34 - Healing through love and forgiveness. 51:02 - Redemption through personal struggles. 56:46 - Parenting and addiction recovery. 01:08 - Restorative justice and personal growth. 1:11:52 - Self-improvement in prison. 1:15:29 - Ancestors and generational healing. 1:24:10 - Spiritual healing. 1:28:55 - Face-to-face meeting with family. Quotes: "This is what it looks like when we choose to heal our entire life and when we put love, compassion, and understanding at the absolute center of our lives" "One of my biggest triggers is losing control." "I can't reach out to call anybody and ask for help because I'm gonna feel like less of a man or I'm gonna feel like a loser." "That night broke me open in ways that I could never, ever, ever have imagined." "She was totally gone. There was no Michelle." "I was in a totally different kind of prison than what you were in." "It was a calling that I, I mean, I'm gonna say divine, creator, God, whatever you wanna call it, was absolutely calling me to do this." "If I don't, as a mother, right now, teach her that there's another way, I'm gonna cause her more harm than you could have ever caused her." "I made the decision to stay up for two days. I made the decision to drink and drive, and I got in that car." "I realized, sitting in that room of a bunch of men telling the truth, that I had been denying the truth my whole life, that I was damaging the people that I care about." "I had my own prison sentence going on that nobody knew about, that I was running from, that wasn't even real." "I no longer see myself as a monster. And actually, your words, you helped humanize me again." "Nothing has grounded me like this, where I just call on my ancestors for help." Stay Connected: Don't miss out on more inspiring conversations and stories on the Soul Wide Open podcast. Subscribe now and join us on this journey of healing, growth, and living with your soul wide open. Connect with Michelle: My Website https://michelle-renee.com [https://michelle-renee.com] Instagram: / _michellerenee_ [https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqbk1VVE5HQ3FOSVdJN1RDRXROVHQzWWdPbnh0d3xBQ3Jtc0ttcmdiUEZ5WDlneGl6YXNtSjlvX1RNWEFXcDZsV2ZyZEpPSzU0UU5taGhtdTFUZUQ1X2VzdGNKVkpRZ0dmYkkxeG1kTFlGQllBSTBQcmtyNmlJb0lkbXBFZUhKaWdFYUM3NDBhV3B5N2pkSXp4YzlKaw&q=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.instagram.com%2F_michellerenee_&v=aDICsnToyIY] TikTok / themichellerenee [https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqa05vTDNUNzg4QmNyMXpKN1VERmYzZGs5cUpSQXxBQ3Jtc0tuX2lKU0hRQlhZTzB1STNUbFp2ZmtWUmhEQXdWU1RaSXF3cjRfcUdvQ1BETjZ4dS00UVNTUVVfR3kycjZZTzdBMHhRbUpxYmMzVWlXX1I4clNNTFdCNGg4WUNhQnptMVFCSllFMi1NLWtHVXdxSFNIUQ&q=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tiktok.com%2F%40themichellerenee&v=aDICsnToyIY] VERB Media Group https://verbmediagroup.com/ [https://verbmediagroup.com/] Connect with Robert: Freedom 4 Youth Robert@freedom4youth.org [Robert@freedom4youth.org] Useful Resources: Order my #1 Best -Selling Memoir Nine Days on Amazon https://amzn.to/4acIkt1 [https://amzn.to/4acIkt1] Soul Wide Open Podcast On Spotify https://spoti.fi/49lrveA [https://spoti.fi/49lrveA] Join the Soul Wide Open FB Group / soulwideopen [https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqbkxLTVJBS3ZBTUZSNVFNYWFfQjduSE16czJOQXxBQ3Jtc0tuRi1XNUxVMUIwN21WUUV1ZmJYZ0xJM3J4bnFDN2hSbU03YnZETDJYcHlHSkVGOFZ1VzlpUWh6emJXaUVsSUZjV3lMSk9yZ3JDZTh0czRmRF9GVFVXOXViWkFTREZURnVsVWNadXF0cDE4U3VBQWl4Yw&q=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Fgroups%2Fsoulwideopen&v=aDICsnToyIY] Watch our CBS/Paramount Plus Special https://www.cbs.com/shows/video/3I6R1... [https://www.youtube.com/redirect?event=video_description&redir_token=QUFFLUhqbkdOWkx1QVVjQzVnaEp0S2JXaXRST19sMDRfUXxBQ3Jtc0tsZXdpcTc2cjNoRVNub0xWS0pfZ2RwUlBtUnZxX2JPSE5GNXdfcEJZVmRvZFNLZWNkemk4YmphRWM5Qldqektua0Rtc3J3QnR0TFhGNDM3X2hHOWw0bU5TU1dWNWUxc0V0SVdpNE1RR2d2NUJ0UzB5UQ&q=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.cbs.com%2Fshows%2Fvideo%2F3I6R18rj_blqVVaBkwyyO901NuyQUKZ_%2F&v=aDICsnToyIY]