Episode 1: The Fake News Fairy Tale

THE RIND KING ACT: TWO, Scene 1

THE RIND KING: ACT II, Scene 1 (Revised) In this scene, the facade of the Rind King’s command tent in the Forest of Despair begins to crack. While the King remains entranced by his own reflection, the Muskrat Wizard frantically tries to manage the "E-Men"—an army of soldiers infused with the King's own narcissism. As the King dismisses logistical disasters as mere "sub-optimal" noise, the true horror of his vanity starts to set in. In this Episode: * The Narcissist’s Den: The Rind King is sequestered in his tent, ignoring the campaign maps strewn around him to focus entirely on the "cut of his jib" in his magic looking glass. * The E-Men’s Rebellion: The Muskrat Wizard discovers that the soldiers are not just "proactive"—they are unhinged, making command decisions without directives and clashing with each other as much as the enemy. * The King’s Delusion: The King refuses to see the chaos, blinded by his own "essence," convinced that an army of "elite Me’s" is the ultimate strategic masterstroke. Featured Song: "INFINITE JEST" — The Troll Chorus emerges from the shadows, their voices whispering and chuckling. This track serves as the dark, rhythmic heartbeat of the scene, mocking the "freakish" General, the "fools' gold" of the mirror, and the terrifying reality that the kingdom is "poised on rotten feet" while the forest hums with "cunning heat." A serialized production from M.R. Furlong and Hush! CAUTION. Echoland Press.

The Fake News Fairy Tale

THE RIND KING ACT: ONE, Scene 4 Welcome to the Wyrd Sisters Unfiltered podcast! Broadcasting truth-adjacent narratives from somewhere north of sanity, the magical hosts tune their crystal balls to the Rind King’s camp. Seeing his growing addiction to the cursed vanity mirror, the witches orchestrate a spectral intervention to shatter his fragile ego. In this Episode: * Stormy, Windy, and Rain analyze the Southern feed, rejoicing over the King’s skyrocketing vanity metrics and algorithmic addiction to his own reflection. * Sister Rain channels the ghost of the Rind King’s disappointed father, who brutally roasts his son's past failures—including a botched attempt to sell a prize sow for magic beans. * The King violently rejects his father’s ghostly criticisms, crying "Fake news!" and seeking comfort in his bronzed, painted visage. * The Witches plant a devastating seed of doubt about the King's capacity to love, before throwing to a sponsor break for a highly questionable alpha-male dietary supplement. Featured Songs: * "This Little Crystal Ball" – The Wyrd Sisters' eerie, upbeat intro theme as they scry into the Southern Kingdom’s doom. * "Roar More" – A hilarious, hyper-masculine commercial jingle sung by the Roar More Bros Trolls, complete with a rapid-fire FDA disclaimer. A serialized production from M.R. Furlong and Hush! CAUTION. Echoland Press.

The Fake News Fairy Tale

THE RIND KING ACT: ONE, Scene 3 Deep in the ominous Forest of Doubt and Despair, Southern General Marius wrestles with his conscience. Torn between a tyrant’s cruel orders and his forbidden romance with a Northern fairy named Lyra, Marius quickly learns that crossing enemy lines is much easier than crossing the boundaries of magical intimacy. In this Episode: * Marius laments his role in the Rind King's war machine, caught in a conflicted "fever dream" of guilt, duty, and desire. * A romantic rendezvous between Marius and Lyra goes explosively wrong when his mortal lust clashes with her fairy purity, resulting in literal lightning strikes and a lost mustache. * The Troll Chorus mercilessly taunts the General's one-track mind, urging him to picture tactical maps and catapults instead of fairy curves. * Lyra attempts a "pure thought" grounding technique involving two Tufted Titmice (Humper and Dinker), before reluctantly summoning her cynical Mother to act as a magical lightning rod. Featured Songs: * "Fever Dream" – Marius’s soaring, impassioned ballad about the heavy chains of duty and the pull of love. * "Sparkle and a Crack / Thinking is the Pits" – The Trolls' raucous, mocking chants warning Marius to keep his mind out of the gutter or risk frying his bits. A serialized production from M.R. Furlong and Hush! CAUTION. Echoland Press.

The Fake News Fairy Tale

THE RIND KING ACT ONE: Scene 2 In the second scene, the focus shifts North where Elara, the Elf Queen, is surrounded by crystals, lucky charms, and a scrying bowl, peering anxiously into a teacup. As she spirals over the dark future, her court fool, Jingo, looks on with utter disdain, trying to ground her panic in reality. In this Episode: · Elara sings anxiously of the omens in her tea leaves, terrified that the King's legions and "iron fist" will seize the pass. · Jingo counters with dry logic, dismissing the threat by noting that the King's hands "are rather small to seize the day". · The crystal warns Elara of the Muskrat's wicked craft, leading to a glaring malapropism where she fears a "phallus" too large to defend. · Jingo cringes at the slip-up and corrects her to "phalanx," predicting that the amassed forces will hit a wall and fall when the forest "whispers its doubt to all". Featured Songs: "THE OMENS" – A comedic duet contrasting Elara's cries of "The horror! The horror!" with Jingo's insistence that "the fates have no say when the facts have been said". A serialized production from M.R. Furlong and Hush! CAUTION. Echoland Press.

Episode 1: The Fake News Fairy Tale

THE RIND KING ACT: ONE, Scene 1 In the series premiere, the Forest of Despair is abuzz with "tweets" and rumors. As the Rind King prepares a northern invasion to seize "precious magic," the very fabric of reality begins to peel. In this Episode: * The Troll Chorus sets the stage, repeating every rumor from a "bluebird down the street" about the King’s impending march North. * Fairy King Poutini surveys the "vomitus pastiche" of the southern court and plants a cursed looking glass to amplify the King's vanity. * The Servants scramble to style a "hairline with no tomorrow" and avoid the gallows by singing the King's praises. * The Muskrat Wizard reveals his "Essence" atomizer, a viral protein sequence designed to restructure the minds of the King's "E-Men". Featured Songs: "Heard a Tweet" – The Trolls' chaotic introduction to the world's rumors. * "Hail the Rind King" – The servants' desperate, shaky anthem of praise (featuring the infamous "Mighty Bell" verse). * "The Mirror Works" – The Trolls' ominous realization that the spell of vanity has taken hold. A serialized production from M.R. Furlong and Hush! CAUTION. Echoland Press.