S2E8 From Losing Her Mom to Finding Herself: Lori Karsch on Grief and Self-Compassion

S2E8 From Losing Her Mom to Finding Herself: Lori Karsch on Grief and Self-Compassion

When Survival Mode Becomes Your Personality  with Lori Karsch, Author of Torn Wide Open Lori Karsch was 27 when a rare brain condition took her mom; her safe place, and the only one she had. What came after was decades of survival mode so constant it started to feel like her personality: the people-pleasing, the hypervigilance, the little voice she kept shoving aside. Then she sat down to write her story for her daughters, and saw all of it for the first time. In this conversation, Lori talks with Sherry and Jodi about what grief actually does to a life; how it lingers, reshapes the calendar, and how joy can make space beside it without betraying anyone. She shares the ladybug her family still finds in the most unlikely places, what it meant to stop handing out passes to people who didn't deserve them, and the one moment she ever felt connected to her dad. And she leaves listeners with the line we haven't stopped thinking about: the things you did to survive are not your identity. You're in there somewhere, and your best job is to find out where. Because if you have yourself, you don't feel alone; you're the one you go through life with the whole time! Connect with Lori: * Book: Torn Wide Open: What Ripped Me Apart Also Made Me Whole → https://amzn.to/3T5hdwa [https://amzn.to/3T5hdwa] * Website (free prologue download): lorikarsch.com * Instagram (she posts daily): @loribkarsh * Lori can also be found on LinkedIn, YouTube, and Facebook. From Thriving Yinzers: * Browse our favorites in our TY Toolkit Amazon storefront → https://amzn.to/4hefBKz [https://amzn.to/4hefBKz] * Next episode: Sherry and Jodi's reflections on this conversation; what self-compassion looks like in our world. As an Amazon Influencer, we earn from qualifying purchases. Links above may earn us a small commission at no extra cost to you. If this episode found you at the right moment, pass it on! That's how we grow. Let us know how we are doing. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2452136/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.paypal.com/ncp/payment/Y6HZFYZEDK958] You can help support the podcast while doing something good for YOU! Shop our TY Toolkit for practical tools, books, and organizing essentials to help you manage life with more ease and intention. Books referenced on the podcast are available in the TY Toolkit, at the Thriving Yinzers Storefront@ https://amzn.to/4etLxsP [https://amzn.to/4etLxsP]. Rate, Review, and Share the podcast with your friends and family. Shop our TY Toolkit at thrivingyinzers.com or through Amazon Associates links listed above for books & resources mentioned on the podcast to keep you inspired. We receive a small commission for your purchase which helps support the podcast.  Sign up for email updates and special offers at thrivingyinzers.com/podcast [http:/thrivingyinzers.com/podcast]. Follow “This is It! The Podcast by Thriving Yinzers [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61574248263191]” on Facebook or Instagram @typghpod [https://www.instagram.com/typghpod] * 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline — Call or text 988 * https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org/]

S2E7 Still Becoming: You're Never Done, and That's the Best Part

ABOUT THIS EPISODE We’re revisiting growth mindset and  the real question underneath it: do you still believe you’re becoming, or have you quietly stopped expecting more for yourself? Sherry and Jodi talk through the difference between “I can’t” and “I can’t yet,” Michael Jordan walking away from basketball at the peak of his career, and how Fred Rogers turned a lonely, bullied childhood into a 33-year mission. This one ties together everything we’ve built this season: self-awareness, agency, emotional regulation, and now growth. Growth mindset isn’t about being happy and pushing through with a smile. Growing is hard! There’s a reason they call them growing pains. But if you still have that whisper, even quietly buried underneath everything else that’s enough to start. IN THIS EPISODE •  Why growth starts to feel like it’s for other people and how to push back •  The power of “not yet” and Carol Dweck’s research on growth mindset •  The difference between not quitting and actually growing •  What we can learn from Michael Jordan •  Fred Rogers showed us the Pittsburgh way of becoming more  •  Why responsibility removes the comfort of blame and why that’s freeing •  What growth mindset looks like in relationships •  The whisper: “I did not survive this just to exist” •  Why backward moments don’t mean you can’t move forward THIS SEASON ON THIS IS IT! ◄ Previous episode: Dr. Leslie B. Newman: Positive Psychology & Emotional Regulation  https://www.buzzsprout.com/2452136/episodes/19376676 [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2452136/episodes/19376676] ► Coming up next: Lori Karsch on Self-Compassion  and Grief  RESOURCES & REFERENCES Carol Dweck:  Growth Mindset Research The researcher behind the concept of growth mindset. Her work on “not yet” is referenced in this episode, and her book is linked in our TY Toolkit. Fred Rogers:  Pittsburgh Legacy Fred Rogers planned to be a minister before pivoting to television, collaborating with child psychologists at Pitt, and building one of the most beloved shows in television history for 33 years! He made mistakes in front of children on purpose because he wanted them to see it. •  Fred Rogers Center [https://fredrogerscenter.org/] John Maxwell — Quote Referenced “Ideas have a short shelf life and you have to act on them before the expiration date.” SUPPORT THE SHOW If this episode found you at the right moment, the best thing you can do is pass it on. That’s how we grow. •  Follow the show on your podcast platform •  Leave us a review.  It helps more people find us! Shop Amazon Through Our Link: If you already shop on Amazon, just access it through our storefront link. You don’t have to buy a single thing from our store — it costs you nothing extra and it really helps us keep going. •  Thriving Yinzers Amazon Storefront [https://a.co/d/09cGQmlj] TY Toolkit: Looking for something specific we talked about on the show? Check the TY Toolkit for tools we actually recommend. •  TY Toolkit at ThrivingYinzers.com [https://www.thrivingyinzers.com] NEED SUPPORT? This podcast is meant to be informational and inspirational, but it is not a substitute for professional advice. We are not licensed therapists or medical professionals, and what we share here comes from personal experience only. If you or someone you love is struggling, please reach out to someone trained to help. 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline  —  Call or text 988, available 24/7 Resolve Crisis Services Pittsburgh  —  1-888-796-8226 Let us know how we are doing. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2452136/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.paypal.com/ncp/payment/Y6HZFYZEDK958] You can help support the podcast while doing something good for YOU! Shop our TY Toolkit for practical tools, books, and organizing essentials to help you manage life with more ease and intention. Books referenced on the podcast are available in the TY Toolkit, at the Thriving Yinzers Storefront@ https://amzn.to/4etLxsP [https://amzn.to/4etLxsP]. Rate, Review, and Share the podcast with your friends and family. Shop our TY Toolkit at thrivingyinzers.com or through Amazon Associates links listed above for books & resources mentioned on the podcast to keep you inspired. We receive a small commission for your purchase which helps support the podcast.  Sign up for email updates and special offers at thrivingyinzers.com/podcast [http:/thrivingyinzers.com/podcast]. Follow “This is It! The Podcast by Thriving Yinzers [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61574248263191]” on Facebook or Instagram @typghpod [https://www.instagram.com/typghpod] * 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline — Call or text 988 * https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org/]

S2E6 Stop Trying to Fix Yourself: Self-Trust Over Self-Improvement w/Dr. Leslie B Newman

Ever feel like you’ve been “doing the work” for years and somehow still end up back in the same place, asking yourself what’s wrong with you? We’re pulling the plug on that idea with Dr. Leslie B. Newman, psychologist, author, and positive psychology expert, because growth isn’t a straight line and you’re not a project to be completed. We talk about what it looks like when progress comes in loops, not checklists, and why self-trust is often the real goal hiding underneath self-improvement. We get practical about mental health tools that work for real life. Dr. Newman breaks down why therapy is a matching process, how different therapy types can fit different people, and why curiosity beats shame when you’re trying to find support. We also share a simple emotional regulation approach she calls the “magic closet,” plus a powerful shower visualization for releasing what you’re holding and refilling yourself with something lighter when you’re tired, stretched thin, or on the edge of reacting. Then we go straight at the internet’s favorite trap: toxic positivity. Dr. Newman explains how real positive psychology doesn’t deny grief, anger, or exhaustion, it makes room for it, because the only way out is through. We also talk about how to show up for someone in pain without trying to say the perfect thing, and why presence can be the most supportive language.If you’re in a hard season, this one will meet you where you are and still help you find one next right step.  🔗  Dr. Leslie B. Newman drlesliebnewman.com [https://drlesliebnewman.com] Follow Dr. Leslie on Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/drlesliebnewman/] 📘  A Daily Dose of Happiness by Dr. Leslie B. Newman Available at drlesliebnewman.com — and the audio version is available too, perfect for your walks. Get the book → [https://drlesliebnewman.com] https://amzn.to/4vh38dg [https://amzn.to/4vh38dg] (paid link) 📖  From Kansas to Oz — Dr. Newman's next book Completed and currently seeking literary representation. Stay close — it's coming. 🧠  Curious about the types of therapy mentioned? Therapy is a matching process — there's something out there that fits you. Start by exploring: drlesliebnewman.com [https://drlesliebnewman.com] — Dr. Newman's resources Psychology Today Therapist Finder [https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists] — search by therapy type near you 🔬  Carl Jung & the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Dr. Newman's Jungian therapist shaped her early growth. Jung also developed the framework behind the Myers-Briggs personality assessment. Learn more at myersbriggs.org → [https://www.myersbriggs.org] ✨  Barbara Brennan School of Healing Dr. Newman is a graduate of the Barbara Brennan School of Healing — the energy healing framework she references throughout this conversation. barbarabrennan.com → [https://barbarabrennan.com] CONNECT THE EPISODES ⬅️  Previous episode — S2E5 Don't Be a Jagoff — And Don't Let One Run Your Life Emotional regulation, the stop sign, and what to do with all that energy before it runs you. Listen now → [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2452136/episodes/19293030] ➡️  Coming up next Sherry and Jodi take everything Dr. Newman gave us and bring it home. What does a growth mindset actually look like in real everyday life? The real version. .FOLLOW If this episode found you at the right moment — hit follow wherever you're listening and turn on your notifications so our next episode lands right in your feed the moment it drops. And if it helped you — pass it on. That's how we grow. 🌐  thrivingyinzers.com thrivingyinzers.com [https://www.thrivingyinzers.com] Let us know how we are doing. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2452136/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.paypal.com/ncp/payment/Y6HZFYZEDK958] You can help support the podcast while doing something good for YOU! Shop our TY Toolkit for practical tools, books, and organizing essentials to help you manage life with more ease and intention. Books referenced on the podcast are available in the TY Toolkit, at the Thriving Yinzers Storefront@ https://amzn.to/4etLxsP [https://amzn.to/4etLxsP]. Rate, Review, and Share the podcast with your friends and family. Shop our TY Toolkit at thrivingyinzers.com or through Amazon Associates links listed above for books & resources mentioned on the podcast to keep you inspired. We receive a small commission for your purchase which helps support the podcast.  Sign up for email updates and special offers at thrivingyinzers.com/podcast [http:/thrivingyinzers.com/podcast]. Follow “This is It! The Podcast by Thriving Yinzers [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61574248263191]” on Facebook or Instagram @typghpod [https://www.instagram.com/typghpod] * 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline — Call or text 988 * https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org/]

S2E5 Don't be a Jagoff and Don’t Let One Run Your Life

Emotional Regulation: Working With Your Emotions, Not Against Them Somebody blows up, shuts down, or flips the story so fast you end up apologizing and wondering what just happened. We start there, but we don’t stay there, because the real leverage point is what we do with our own emotions first. We talk about emotional regulation as a learnable skill, why emotions are signals not threats, and how a small pause can keep a hard moment from becoming collateral damage. Anger gets a special spotlight. We break down how anger can show up as lashing out, simmering bitterness, or something surprisingly useful: purposeful information. When you ask, “What is this actually telling me?” you often find a boundary that got crossed, a value that matters, or a change you’ve been avoiding. From there we get practical about communication, including why “you always” shuts people down and how “I need…” can lower the temperature without making you smaller. Then we switch gears to the people who make it harder: emotionally immature coworkers, family members, partners, or friends who offload discomfort onto everyone around them. We share ways to stop feeding the fire, table conversations when the moment is not the moment, and set boundaries you can actually hold. We also zoom out to leadership and workplace culture, where mental health is increasingly treated as part of safety, performance, and retention, not a nice-to-have perk. If any of this hits close to home, check the resources in the show notes, share this with someone and subscribe so you don’t miss what's next.  Tools to Strengthen Emotional Regulation * Headspace — Guided meditation, breathing exercises, and stress management https://www.headspace.com [https://www.headspace.com] * Calm — Meditation, sleep, and daily mindfulness https://www.calm.com [https://www.calm.com] * Insight Timer — Free meditations and mindfulness tools https://insighttimer.com [https://insighttimer.com] * How We Feel — Free emotion tracking and journaling app built with psychologists     https://howwefeel.org [https://howwefeel.org] Finding a Therapist * Psychology Today Therapist Finder — Pittsburgh — Search by insurance, specialty, and location * https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/pa/pittsburgh [https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/pa/pittsburgh] Local Pittsburgh Support * NAMI Keystone Pennsylvania — Free peer support groups, education programs, and mental health resources for individuals and families across the Pittsburgh region   https://www.namikeystonepa.org [https://www.namikeystonepa.org] * Allegheny County Behavioral Health Resources — County-level support and referral directory  https://www.alleghenycounty.us/human-services/programs-services/behavioral-health [https://www.alleghenycounty.us/human-services/programs-services/behavioral-health] A NOTE TO CARRY WITH YOU Start where you are. Do what you can. Notice the difference it makes. Every small choice compounds. You don't have to fix everything today — you just have to take the next small step.We're right here with you, learning, reflecting, and growing. This is it.       thrivingyinzers.com  |  Fill your life tackle box. Let us know how we are doing. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2452136/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.paypal.com/ncp/payment/Y6HZFYZEDK958] You can help support the podcast while doing something good for YOU! Shop our TY Toolkit for practical tools, books, and organizing essentials to help you manage life with more ease and intention. Books referenced on the podcast are available in the TY Toolkit, at the Thriving Yinzers Storefront@ https://amzn.to/4etLxsP [https://amzn.to/4etLxsP]. Rate, Review, and Share the podcast with your friends and family. Shop our TY Toolkit at thrivingyinzers.com or through Amazon Associates links listed above for books & resources mentioned on the podcast to keep you inspired. We receive a small commission for your purchase which helps support the podcast.  Sign up for email updates and special offers at thrivingyinzers.com/podcast [http:/thrivingyinzers.com/podcast]. Follow “This is It! The Podcast by Thriving Yinzers [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61574248263191]” on Facebook or Instagram @typghpod [https://www.instagram.com/typghpod] * 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline — Call or text 988 * https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org/]

S2E4 Let's Talk About Fishburgh and the Kid Who Left Different

A kid catches a fish and suddenly stands a little taller. That moment is why we wanted Phil Papa on the show. Phil is the founder of Fishburgh Outdoors, a Pittsburgh youth fishing program built to help families get outside, get off screens, and feel that rare mix of calm and lit up that happens near the water. What starts as a bluegill at a city pond becomes something bigger: confidence, patience, and a new story about who you can be.  We get into the practical side of urban fishing for beginners, including why “catching” matters more than “waiting,” how small hooks and simple bait set kids up for success, and how Phil’s bamboo catching sticks solve the two things that ruin most first trips: tangles and boredom. Phil also shares the unforgettable “crappie kid” story, where one shy child lands a rare fish and leaves different than he arrived, then comes back ready to teach the next kid.  We also zoom out to Pittsburgh’s waterways and conservation. Phil pushes back on the myth that the rivers are hopeless, talks about proper fish handling and catch and release, and explains why anglers are often the ones funding clean water through the Dingell-Johnson Act and fishing license dollars. Then we tackle the messy part: litter, public trust, and how stewardship gets passed forward one garbage bag at a time. If you feel pulled to help, Fishburgh needs people behind the scenes as much as it needs anglers.  If this conversation hits home, subscribe so you do not miss what’s next, share it with someone who needs a healthy hobby, and leave a review to help more listeners find the show. What is the thing you reach for when life gets heavy? Connect with Phillip Papa & Fishburgh Outdoors Fishburgh hosts free fishing events the last Saturday of every month. No experience needed. →  Website & Event Sign-Up: fishburgh.com →  Follow on Social Media: @FishburghOutdoors [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61575466243818] Check Fishburgh's social media for the latest events, locations, and everything happening on the water in Pittsburgh. The Conservation Connection In this episode Phil mentioned that part of every fishing equipment sale goes directly to conservation — he knew it was real but couldn't place the name. We found it. •  The Dingell-Johnson Act (1950) — also known as the Federal Aid in Sport Fish Restoration Act — collects excise taxes on fishing equipment and funnels 100% of those funds into fisheries conservation and restoration. It has been running for 75 years. •  On top of that, 100% of every fishing license sold in this country goes to conservation. By law. Not some of it — all of it. Every cast is a contribution. →  Learn More — Dingell-Johnson Act: https://www.fws.gov/service/sport-fish-restoration Let us know how we are doing. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2452136/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.paypal.com/ncp/payment/Y6HZFYZEDK958] You can help support the podcast while doing something good for YOU! Shop our TY Toolkit for practical tools, books, and organizing essentials to help you manage life with more ease and intention. Books referenced on the podcast are available in the TY Toolkit, at the Thriving Yinzers Storefront@ https://amzn.to/4etLxsP [https://amzn.to/4etLxsP]. Rate, Review, and Share the podcast with your friends and family. Shop our TY Toolkit at thrivingyinzers.com or through Amazon Associates links listed above for books & resources mentioned on the podcast to keep you inspired. We receive a small commission for your purchase which helps support the podcast.  Sign up for email updates and special offers at thrivingyinzers.com/podcast [http:/thrivingyinzers.com/podcast]. Follow “This is It! The Podcast by Thriving Yinzers [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61574248263191]” on Facebook or Instagram @typghpod [https://www.instagram.com/typghpod] * 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline — Call or text 988 * https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org/]