36. Surviving the internet (and general rejection) as over-sharing actors.

36. Surviving the internet (and general rejection) as over-sharing actors.

Gab shared a post this week about the "thanks but no thanks" emails that come with the job, and the internet had...feelings. Which brings us into difference between processing your feelings and wallowing in them, why having a big resume doesn't make rejection sting less, and how the pressure to perform positivity (online and as actors in general) quietly makes us smaller...and how much it comes down to being seen and accepted. Links The Membership: https://themembership.co/ [https://themembership.co/]Sam on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samvalentine/ [https://www.instagram.com/samvalentine/]Gab on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gabriellebyndloss/ [https://www.instagram.com/gabriellebyndloss/] Chapters 00:00 - Behind the scenes chaos and missing episode 2802:30 - Gab's rejection post and the "just be grateful" comments07:00 - Sam on learning to have opinions online without people-pleasing09:00 - How rejection notes make us question our choices (and our looks)11:00 - Street cred, submission reports, and the legitimacy question13:30 - Who's actually lurking and what they're deciding about you15:30 - Having credits doesn't mean rejection hurts less18:00 - Forced positivity, auditions, and what we're told women shouldn't feel20:00 - Sam's rule: it's your house, don't let anyone leave trash on your lawn23:00 - How Sam and Gab are wired completely differently, and why it works26:00 - The CVS story you didn't know you needed to hear27:00 - Does any of this make us smaller as actors? Actually... no29:30 - Timothee Chalamet, Marty Supreme, and singularly focused characters31:00 - We don't live in singularities33:00 - 20,000 listeners and Gab still doesn't believe anyone's watching

35. (trigger warning) How auditioning can bring up survival mode.

Trigger Warning: we discuss eating disorders and sexual assault in this episode. Please only listen if this is a safe space for you. Two real booking stories, one booking and one not (yet), and what they reveal about the auditions we almost talked ourselves out of: this week, Gab is dialing in live from Nashville where she's on set for a commercial that put her through one of the most challenging callbacks of her career. Sam shares the not-booking story where being too young was somehow the problem. And we wide up chatting about how the audition process has a way of surfacing things that have nothing to do with acting and everything to do with who you've had to become to survive. We didn't plan to go this deep...but Sam didn't edit it out. Links Join The Membership: https://themembership.co/Sam on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samvalentine/Gab on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gabriellebyndloss/ Chapter Markers [00:00:00] Gab is live from Nashville (on a commercial booking)[00:01:00] The audition that almost broke Gab before the booking[00:02:00] The nationwide callback, the timeline pressure, and the live TM watch party[00:04:00] 30 redirects on one line and what that actually means[00:05:00] When the feedback hits different because of your identity[00:07:00] Why Gab records every callback (and what she found when she watched it back)[00:08:00] The avail, the booking, and the full Nashville logistics saga[00:10:00] The reframe: auditions are not supposed to be fun[00:13:00] Sam's not-booking story: the casting director who said she was too young[00:15:00] The age range spiral and what it means to be stuck between brackets[00:18:00] The healthy stalk that actually helped[00:21:00] Sun exposure, Botox, and whether taking care of yourself changes your casting[00:24:00] The unbothered quality you can't fake and what it actually comes from[00:26:00] How essence can work for you and against you in the same room[00:27:00] Eating disorders, trauma, and this career's way of magnifying what we carry[00:33:00] Why actors might be doing the most important work without realizing it[00:35:00] Wrap-up and a reminder that this podcast is doing very well (Gab still doesn't believe it)

34. The "momentum" Conversation: Using your bookings and wins with reps, casting, and the the media.

So you booked and want to know how to turn that momentum into something more.PR? Get a Deadline article? Rebrand? We're getting honest about what actually moves the needle versus what just burns money. We break down our own PR experiences and why media coverage hits differently depending on your credit level. And what else you can do with your wins. Links: The Membership: https://themembership.co/Sam on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samvalentine/Gab on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gabriellebyndloss/ Chapters: [00:00:00] Welcome back + setting up the episode[00:01:00] The member question: how do I use momentum after a booking?[00:02:00] Sam's PR experience after her 2020 film[00:03:00] Gab's PR experience with Marvel and the discount she negotiated[00:04:00] Why Deadline articles matter for SEO, and when they're actually worth it[00:05:00] The real deal on Voyage LA and "pay to play" local press[00:06:00] When PR might actually make sense (and when it absolutely doesn't)[00:07:00] What your reps are already doing with your momentum that you can't see[00:08:00] Gab pushes back: co-stars that weren't really co-stars[00:09:00] Atlanta vs LA: what a co-star booking actually looks like in different markets[00:11:00] Gab paid for a Voyage article and never received it. A cautionary tale.[00:12:00] The internal momentum no one talks about[00:13:00] How Sam makes a big deal out of small wins, and why that matters[00:14:00] On auditions you didn't book and the stories we tell ourselves to stay in the game[00:15:00] Using near-misses as data points and pitching yourself for the right role[00:16:00] The audition Sam turned into a second opportunity (and booked)[00:17:00] Gab's been reading! "Don't Believe Everything You Think" and goal-setting from inspiration vs. scarcity[00:20:00] What it looks like when a member's mindset shifts in real time[00:23:00] Urgency, fear, and why pushing harder doesn't make this industry reward you faster[00:23:30] Outro + a teaser about Gab's week

33. From Sides to Deadline: Vas Saranga on His Netflix Booking and What Gets Actors Cast

Our in-house Coach Vas is back on the pod, and we brought him on at exactly the right moment: his Deadline article just dropped for his brand new booking on the Netflix limited series I Will Find You, and we could not wait to dig into every part of how it happened. From the audition process + live Zoom session and the day to day of being on the set, this episode is a real behind-the-scenes look at what booking actually looks like from someone who coaches and acts. Vas also walks us through his SELECT framework he developed to make sense of how any actor gets cast. SELECT stands for Skill, Experience, Luck, Essence, Connections, and Timing, and hearing him break it down against his own recent booking is one of the most practical things we have heard on this show.} Links Join The Membership (TM) [https://themembership.co/] Sam on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/samvalentine/] Gab on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/gabrielleunger] Timestamps 00:00 Welcome back, Coach Vas! The Deadline article drop and the Netflix booking news03:00 The full audition timeline: reading for one role, getting called back for another05:00 Live Zoom vs. self-tape: why Vas prefers self-taping and what changed in this session07:00 The director who hated him: breaking down creative differences vs. personal conflict10:00 What it means to be "hated" on a job and why it can actually signal your value13:00 Being loved vs. liked: why authenticity creates polarizing reactions15:00 The Vas-style audition: safety takes, elevated takes, and the four Es (Energy, Emotion, Engagement, Environment)19:00 How Vas decides which takes to submit and in what order22:00 The live Zoom: reading for a different character and referencing The Fugitive25:00 Intra-script improvisation: what it is and why it worked in the room27:00 Gab's callback story: taking ownership of the room through a calculated risk29:00 Introducing SELECT: Skill, Experience, Luck, Essence, Connections, Timing34:00 How SELECT applied to Vas's actual booking36:00 Luck and essence for early-career actors: why you can book before you have everything38:00 Network position: first, second, and third position explained41:00 Wrapping up: how to keep working on your SELECT letters even when auditions are slow45:00 Did Vas pay a publicist to get in Deadline? The answer might surprise you

32. Current audition situation: zero comfort-zone.

We're pulling back the curtain on two very different audition-challenges we're each navigating right now: Sam took a leap on an audition that requires her to sing an original Christmas song..despite having been removed from choir as a kid. Gab is managing the physical, emotional, and logistical reality of straightening her 4C hair for a series of auditions while unpacking the complicated feelings that come with it. ...and essentially why both of us are choosing to lean into the discomfort rather than pass on what scares us. We wrap with a little detour into the Alex Cooper vs. Alix Earle situation because honestly, sometimes you just need some low-stakes drama to decompress. Links Join The Membership (TM) [https://themembership.co/] Sam on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/samvalentine/] Gab on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/gabriellebyndloss/] [00:00:00] Welcome back[00:01:38] Sam's singing audition[00:05:36] Favors, voice coaches & asking for an extension[00:08:31] When an audition pushes you out of your comfort zone[00:13:22] Gab's straight hair journey[00:15:00] The beauty politics of hair[00:25:26] Finding the fun in the hard stuff[00:28:32] Using personal challenges to deepen your acting[00:31:05] Detour- Alex Cooper vs. Alex Earl[00:36:22] Gab's upcoming live with Jen Rudolph[00:41:27] Ratings, reviews & where to find us