What Black & Queer Men Carry | Brave Voices ft. Quincey Roberts Sr., Victor Hicks & Victor Terry
"Man up is one of the most expensive pieces of advice we ever gave Black boys. It costs our souls so much."— Craig Aarons-Martin
Most people think Moonlight is a film about being gay. Host Craig Aarons-Martin — Black queer man, NAESP National Distinguished Principal, and proud Phi Beta Sigma — sat down with three D9 brothers to argue otherwise.
This episode uses Barry Jenkins' Oscar-winning film as a doorway into the conversations Black men — queer and straight, have been waiting to have. What does it cost to perform masculinity every day? What does it mean to belong to a brotherhood that is both a gift and a growth edge? What is actually hiding behind "he's dealing with demons"?
Joining Craig are the co-founder of the Hispanic Black Gay Coalition, Quincey J. Roberts Sr., educator and founder of Coding with Culture Victor Hicks, and president of Iota Phi Theta Boston and founder of Necessary Means Consulting Victor Terry — all D9 men, all willing to go there.
In this episode:
— Why Chiron's hardest weight had nothing to do with his sexuality— Victor Terry's first experience of a straight man saying "if you're gay, that's okay" — and why it changed everything— Victor Hicks on centering Blackness first and why "gay was about 17th on my list in Chicago."— Quincey's raw honesty: an openly gay father still catching himself telling his son, "don't be soft."— Why the American Empire demands Black men be labor, not human— D9 Brotherhood, the Pride post, and whether our organizations are willing to lead— The mental health crisis behind "he's dealing with demons."— Why Victor Hicks called individualism the biggest drug plaguing the Black community— Practical tools: mental health plans, feelings wheels, journaling, therapy, and community
"Don't nobody know what it's like to be a Black man in America but a Black man."— Victor Terry
This conversation is for Black queer men. It's also for every brother who loves one, works with one, is raising one, or simply recognizes that the performance of masculinity has cost all of us something.
The conversation is not over. This is just part one.
📗 Craig's book: Creating Brave Spaces for LGBTQIA+ Youth (ASCD/ISTE) — ascd.org🌐 ccmeducationgroup.co | @iamcraigaaronsmartin | @bravevoicespod
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