Feel Better

Close Your Confidence Gap

Do you look capable on the outside but feel held back by self-doubt on the inside? You're not alone, and you're not failing. You might just be living with a confidence gap. In this episode, I'm digging into one of the most common and costly patterns I see in high-functioning women: being far more capable than you believe yourself to be. Research shows women tend to underrate their competence, wait until they feel 120% ready before going for opportunities, and carry a five-year lag in their professional self-concept. The result? Missed promotions, missed pay, and a life lived smaller than it needs to be. But confidence isn't a personality trait you either have or you don't. It's a behaviour, and it can be built. I'm sharing my most practical, honest advice for closing the confidence gap, including: * Why your self-concept is behind your actual capabilities and how to update it * The power of acting ahead of your identity (and the Mel Robbins technique that makes it easier) * How what you wear can genuinely shift how you show up * The language patterns that quietly undermine your authority and what to say instead * How to use evidence, not feelings, to build a more accurate picture of who you are * Practical tools for interrupting overthinking and moving towards action * How to channel a confident role model and up-regulate your mood before high-stakes moments Whether you're navigating career decisions, relationship pressures, or simply tired of holding yourself back, this episode will help you carry things differently.

BONUS EPISODE: A Self-Hypnosis Exercise To Re-set Your Nervous System

In this bonus episode, clinical hypnotherapist Bec Marshall guides a short self-hypnosis exercise to help you reduce stress, ease anxiety, and settle into a calm, resourceful state. This exercise is a portable practice you can return to anytime you need to come back to yourself. For the full conversation on hypnotherapy, the subconscious mind, and how we can rewire stress patterns, listen to the full conversation with Bec. Bec would also like to acknowledge her mentor, Tracey, whose work shaped this exercise. Please listen somewhere safe and still.

Wisdom From A Hypnotherapist

What if the heaviness you're carrying isn't a personality trait — it's your nervous system asking for something different? Clinical hypnotherapist Bec Marshall joins Charlotte to unpack hypnotherapy, the fawn response, functional freeze, and how high-functioning women can start feeling safe in their own bodies again. If you've been pushing through, performing capable, and quietly wondering why everything feels heavier than it should, this episode of The Feel Better Podcast is for you. Bec is a clinical hypnotherapist, trainer and nervous system educator with a rare gift for making the science of the subconscious mind feel both fascinating and genuinely useful. Together we explore hypnotherapy, nervous system regulation, and why understanding your stress response is the foundation for feeling better in your body, your motherhood, and your everyday life. Inside this episode: * What hypnotherapy actually is (and what it isn't) * The conscious vs subconscious mind, and why willpower keeps failing you * Fight, flight, freeze and fawn — and why so many women are stuck in fawn * Functional freeze: how high-functioning women run on empty * Why feeling safe in your body is the foundation for nervous system regulation * How birth, motherhood and grief reshaped Bec's own nervous system * A simple three-step framework for moving out of stress: interrupt → anchor → practice * Why food is a signal of safety to your nervous system, not a moral test * The link between long-held emotion, trauma and chronic pain * Plus a bonus self-hypnosis practice you can come back to If you've been searching for a gentler, more grounded approach to anxiety, burnout, perfectionism, and the quiet weight of high-functioning life — this is the conversation you didn't know you needed. Find Bec Marshall at behypnotherapy.co.nz [https://www.behypnotherapy.co.nz/], and more support, tools and ways to work with me at charlottecummings.nz [http://charlottecummings.nz]. The Feel Better Podcast helps high-functioning women carry things differently. New episodes weekly.

How To Talk To Kids About War

If you’ve been wondering how to talk to your kids about war… you’re not alone. With global conflict dominating headlines, many parents are finding themselves having conversations they never expected to have. Conversations about safety, fear, and what’s happening in the world. In this episode, I walk you through how to talk to children about war in a way that keeps them feeling safe, informed, and emotionally steady. You’ll learn: * What to say (and what not to say) to kids about war * How to manage your child’s fear and anxiety * Why “safety first” is the most important starting point * How to explain complex global conflict in age-appropriate ways * How to handle conversations differently for younger kids vs tweens and teens * What to do if your child has already heard things at school or online * How to set boundaries around news, social media, and exposure * How to use this moment to build resilience, emotional literacy, and critical thinking. This isn’t about having the “perfect” conversation. It’s about being the calm, steady place your child comes back to when the world feels uncertain. If you’re a parent trying to support your child through scary or confusing world events, this episode will give you practical tools, language, and confidence to do that well. 🎧 Listen now and feel more equipped to have one of the hardest parenting conversations of our time.

You Hate Routine. Now What?

You want to look after yourself better… but you hate routine. So every time you try to “get your life together,” it lasts about five days. Then you’re back to square one, telling yourself you’re the problem. You’re not. In this Ask Charlotte episode, I’m breaking down why the way we talk about consistency is actually setting a lot of people up to fail and what to do instead. We cover: * Why you don’t need strict routines to take care of yourself * The difference between consistency and repetition * How to use “bursts,” themes, and menus instead of rigid habits * The real reason you’re struggling to start (and how to fix it) * How to stop comparing yourself to the 5am routine crowd * The identity shift that changes everything: “I’m someone who shows up for myself” If you’ve ever thought “I’m just not disciplined enough” this episode will rewire that completely. You don’t need to become a routine person. You need a way of showing up that actually works for you. Subscribe so you don’t miss what’s next.