Pockets of Knowledge

#186. Breaking the Cycle: Love Addiction, Codependency & Reclaiming Your Self-Worth with Chaya Garcia

What if the work of finding the right relationship has nothing to do with finding the right person—and everything to do with becoming the right person for yourself?  In this candid, eye-opening conversation, host Desiree Stanley sits down with Chaya Garcia—dating and relationship expert, CEO, and host of the 100% Podcast—who shares how a painful breakup at 26 became the catalyst for two decades of research into why smart, successful women end up in unhealthy relationships, and what it actually takes to change that pattern for good. Chaya introduces the concept of love addiction—how waiting for a text, craving approval, and staying in relationships that hurt you follows the same physiological cycle as any substance addiction, including the highs, the lows, and the intermittent reinforcement that keeps you hooked. She explains the critical difference between "finding" a partner (which comes from need) and "attracting" one (which comes from wholeness), and why codependency shows up not just in romance but in friendships and work relationships too. She also offers a powerful reframe for anyone considering whether to stay or leave: it's not about having a broken home—it's about protecting your children and yourself from broken people destroying the home you have. Throughout the episode, Chaya shares her signature inner child work—including mirror work, daily self-talk in a gentle tone, and the Rise and Shine framework from her Epic Love Mastermind—as practical tools for rebuilding self-worth from the inside out. Her guiding philosophy: you are 100% imperfect and 100% lovable at the same time, and your happiness was never anyone else's job to create. When you genuinely believe that, the wrong people stop having power over you. Whether you're navigating a difficult relationship, freshly out of one, or simply trying to understand why you keep ending up in the same patterns, this conversation offers both the clarity and the compassion to start choosing yourself—not someday, but right now. Bio: Chaya Garcia is a LMSW and she’s am on a mission to change marriage dynamics through training women (and men) how to love themselves, re-empower their inner child, be honest with who is responsible for their happiness, educate them on healthy and unhealthy signs of behavior during the dating process and ultimately feel secure and confident in making the decision on who to marry that will ensure healthy dynamics and a safe space for each to grow and fulfill their purpose Connect with Chaya: Website: https://connectwithchaya.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheEpicLoveExpert/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chayasarahgarcia/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@EpicLoveExpert [https://www.youtube.com/@EpicLoveExpert] Resource: https://marriedin2025.com/ [https://marriedin2025.com/] Books mentioned: Women Who Love Too Much by  Robin Norwood - https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9780593716779 https://amzn.to/4fbGNc7 Podcasts mentioned: The 100% Podcast with Chaya Garcia - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-100-podcast/id1855653894 Mel Robbins - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-mel-robbins-podcast/id1646101002 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-mel-robbins-podcast/id1646101002]

#185. People-Pleasing, Burnout & Boundaries: How to Protect Your Energy with Anne Karber

What if the exhaustion you're carrying isn't from doing too much—but from doing too much of the wrong things? In this lively, no-BS conversation, host Desiree Stanley sits down with Anne Karber—entrepreneur, author of The Life Hack Playbook, and host of the Let's Get Naked Podcast—who shares how she went from living on autopilot, people-pleasing, and giving from an empty shell to building a life she genuinely loves by getting ruthlessly intentional about where she puts her energy.  Anne introduces her signature "Skittles Energy" concept: your energy is finite, valuable, and yours to spend—and most of us are leaking it all over the place on drama, overthinking, and obligations we never actually agreed to. She explains the difference between a life driven by ego (checking boxes, keeping up appearances) and one driven by soul (aligned choices, savage self-awareness, and boundaries that actually protect your peace). From complaining about traffic to replaying arguments in your head to saying yes when every part of you means no—these are all Skittles you'll never get back. Anne offers practical tools for anyone feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or out of touch with who they actually are: start with low-hanging fruit, pause before reacting, get quiet enough to hear what your body is telling you, and understand that a yes to someone else is always a no to yourself. She also reframes asking for help—not as weakness, but as giving the people who love you the gift of being able to show up for you. Whether you're a serial people-pleaser running on empty, someone who's been giving from a cracked shell for years, or simply curious about why your life feels like it belongs to everyone but you, this conversation offers both the permission and the practical tools to take it back. Bio: Anne Karber is an entrepreneur, author of The Life Hack Playbook, and host of the Let’s Get Naked Podcast. Known for her no-BS approach to personal growth, she challenges people to break out of performative living and build real self-awareness, emotional intelligence, and ownership. Anne blends raw honesty with practical tools—like her signature “Skittles Energy” framework—to help people stop running on autopilot and start making intentional, aligned choices. Through her work, she’s on a mission to spark real conversations, disrupt old patterns, and help people reconnect with who they actually are. Connect with Anne: Email: anne@fj-ltd.com Website: https://annekarber.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Lets-Get-Naked/61564129792887/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lets_get_naked_podcast/?hl=en LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/anne-karber-abbb949b/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@letsgetnakedpodcast Books mentioned: The Life Hack Playbook - Proven Shortcuts to Peace & Purpose by Anne Karber - https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9781969372650 https://amzn.to/48Wk3sv [https://amzn.to/48Wk3sv] The Surrender Experiment by  Michael Singer - https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9780804141109 [https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9780804141109] https://amzn.to/3PjRrTt [https://amzn.to/3PjRrTt]  Brené Brown's work -   The Atlas of the Heart - https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9780399592553 The Atlas of the Heart  Podcasts mentioned: Let's Get Naked with Anne Karber - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/lets-get-naked/id1776246773

#184. When Success Costs Your Health: Redefining Ambition for Women with Dr. Amy Loden Tiffany

What if the version of success you're chasing is actually killing you? In this candid conversation, host Desiree Stanley sits down with Dr. Amy Loden Tiffany—physician entrepreneur, TEDx speaker, author, and mom of five—who shares how she went from burnout and serious health crises to building a thriving concierge practice that helps ambitious women reclaim their health without losing their impact.   Dr. Amy's journey includes multiple wake-up calls that forced her to ask: am I being who I want to be, and if not, what am I going to do about it? She rebuilt her medical practice and her life around a different definition of success—one that doesn't require sacrificing health, relationships, or sanity to make an impact.   Throughout the episode, Dr. Amy explains what most doctors won't tell you: pregnancy complications like gestational diabetes and preeclampsia aren't just pregnancy problems—they're warning signs of serious long-term health risks. Half of women with gestational diabetes develop type 2 diabetes within five years. Women with preeclampsia face four times higher risk of dying from cardiovascular disease before age 60 if left untreated. Yet the healthcare system offers little intervention after delivery. She introduces her VIP framework for decision-making: Values (what matters most), Impact (the change you want to create), and Priorities (how you manage them without guilt). Dr. Amy challenges the myth that successful women just need better time management—the real issue is priority management aligned with your values. Whether you're an ambitious woman feeling the pressure to do it all, navigating postpartum or perimenopause while maintaining your career, or anyone who suspects the way you're living isn't sustainable, this conversation offers both urgent truth and practical tools for building a life that doesn't require sacrificing your health for your success. Bio: Dr. Amy Loden Tiffany is a physician entrepreneur, TEDx speaker, author, and mom of five who’s redefining what success looks like for ambitious women. After years in traditional medicine, Dr. Tiffany built a thriving concierge practice that helps women reclaim their health, energy, and confidence while leading in business, family, and life. She turned her own story of burnout and reinvention into a blueprint for ambitious women who want to lead powerfully without losing themselves. From postpartum to perimenopause, from the boardroom to the home, Dr. Tiffany helps women align their health and goals so they can thrive in every arena of life.  Connect with Dr. Amy: Email [aloden@vitalitymwc.org] Website [https://vitalitymwc.org/] Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/vitalitymwc] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/dramytiffany/] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/amy-loden/] YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@DrAmyTiffany] Resource: TEDx Talk [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDwEqlO_JoY]  The Menopause Society [https://menopause.org/] Books mentioned: Postpartum Pivot by Amy Loden Tiffany, MD, MBA [https://amzn.to/4ujCFuL] Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing By Bronnie Ware [https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9781401956004] Atomic Habits by  James Clear - https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9780735211292 https://amzn.to/4na6knW Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win (New Edition) by Jocko Willink, Leif Babin - https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9781250183866 https://amzn.to/4cSsbeF Podcasts mentioned: The Authentic Physician [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUVMwru_Vu7ueZVCRaY1hrg] with Dr. Amy Tiffany Diary of a CEO with Steven Bartlett [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-diary-of-a-ceo-with-steven-bartlett/id1291423644] ——— If you enjoyed tuning into this podcast, then do not hesitate to write a review. You can also share this with your friends so that they can be educated, informed, inspired and empowered! Contact me through my website, www.PocketsofKnowledge.com, or find me on Instagram @desireedstanley. Thanks for listening! ——— This podcast is intended to educate, inspire, and empower you on your personal journey. Please note that individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode. This is not intended to treat any medical condition. I am not a medical doctor and do not offer any professional health or medical advice. If you are suffering from any medical conditions, please seek help from a qualified health professional.

#183. One Mentor, One Life, Endless Ripples: Supporting Foster Youth with Ashley Trussell

CONTENT NOTE: This episode briefly mentions child abuse in the context for how one girl entered the foster system. What begins with one life can change entire generations. In this inspiring conversation, host Desiree Stanley sits down with Ashley Trussell—founder of Butterfly Effect Foundation—who shares how a single relationship during COVID led to creating a nonprofit that now mentors teenage girls aging out of foster care in Arizona, one butterfly at a time. Ashley's journey started when she and her husband met a young woman at their church who was in an unsafe home situation. After DCS placed her in a group home, Ashley kept showing up—bringing her to church, helping her get a job, and making vision boards with the other girls in the home. When another girl asked, "Could you be my mentor?", the foundation was born. What makes Butterfly Effect unique is the one-on-one model: each mentor commits to just one girl, creating a genuine relationship without reporting requirements or professional distance—just someone who shows up and genuinely cares. Ashley explains what most of us take for granted but these girls have never experienced: opening a bank account, getting a driver's permit, building a resume, and learning to save. Butterfly Effect helps them catch up through practical support—mentors connect with them to help them learn practical skills, enjoy outings and experiences, and explore careers they never knew existed. She shares the story of one butterfly who discovered flower arranging with her mentor and built a thriving business at 16, learning real-world skills while saving for her first car. Whether you're considering becoming a mentor, looking for ways to support foster youth in your community, or simply want to understand how one person showing up can change everything, this conversation offers both inspiration and a clear path to making a difference. Bio: Ashley Trussell is the Founder & Chair of the Butterfly Effect Foundation. Born and raised in Mesa, Arizona, Ashley and her husband live in Las Sendas and are graduates of Mesa’s Mountain View High School and Arizona State University. Ashley’s two children graduated from Red Mountain High School, with her son playing Division 1 football and graduating from the University of Central Arkansas and her daughter graduating from Grand Canyon University’s Nursing program. Raised in a Christian home, Ashley's values are rooted in God, family, and loving life. Ashley founded Butterfly Effect Foundation, a nonprofit that mentors, one-on-one, teen girls living in group homes, aging out of the foster care system in Arizona. She also serves as a CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate) in Maricopa County. Her life motto is "Love Life." Connect with Ashley: Email [ashley@butterflymentors.org] Website [www.butterflymentors.org] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/butterflyeffectmentors/] Phone - 602-837-3777 Donations can be made directly:  Zelle - 602-837-3777 Venmo - @butterflyeffectfoundation Check - PO Box 20166, Mesa, AZ 85277 Flower Arrangements [https://lunasbouquet.com/] Resources: If you need support, the National Sexual Assault Hotline is available 24/7 at 1-800-656-4673. Books mentioned:  Love Does by Bob Goff - https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9781400203758 https://amzn.to/3R5wQTa [https://amzn.to/3R5wQTa] Everybody Always by Bob Goff - https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9780718078133  https://amzn.to/49fzHPJ Podcasts mentioned: Voices For CASA  The Ramsey Podcast - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-ramsey-show/id77001367

#182. From Survival to Empowerment: Education & Support for Single Moms with Gail Showalter

In this warm, practical conversation, host Desiree Stanley sits down with Gail—speaker, author, and founder of Single Moms Empowered—who has spent nearly two decades turning her hardest season into lasting support for women navigating single motherhood. Gail shares how she returned to college with three little kids and started writing because she realized other women needed the same kind of stories that had carried her through. What began as weekend retreats to give single moms a break evolved into something more permanent when she noticed a pattern: the women who were thriving had some form of education or skill, while those barely scraping by had neither the training nor the time to get it. That insight led her to found Single Moms Empowered in 2007, a nonprofit that helps single mothers earn two-year degrees or certifications in fields with real employment waiting. Throughout the episode, Gail offers clear-eyed, compassionate advice for single mothers and those who want to support them. She talks about the power of routines and calendars, and combating loneliness without running to the wrong places. She encourages awareness without judgment, practical support, and understanding that the viewpoint you have toward a mom makes all the difference.  Whether you're a single mom looking for encouragement and practical tools, someone who wants to support the single mothers in your life, or anyone navigating a season that wasn't part of the plan, this conversation offers both hope and actionable wisdom. Bio: Gail Showalter had it all — three children, a family business, a dream home, a boat, and a promising future. Then came the other woman, and everything changed. As a newly single mom, Gail leaned into inspirational stories that fueled her through the hardest season of her life. She returned to college with three little kids in tow, published her first piece, Baby Steps, and eventually moved in an entirely different direction, becoming a Braille teacher. For sixteen years, she navigated single motherhood firsthand. Trained as a personality specialist in 2000, Gail began coaching women and discovered that understanding personalities is essential to parenting and life. What started as simply wanting to give single moms a break grew into something much bigger. In 2007, she founded Single Moms Empowered, a nonprofit supporting single mothers earning a degree that leads to employment. She's still at it. Gail eventually remarried and is now not only a mother but a grandmother. In southeast Texas, she's known as the "Old Bird with Feathers of Wisdom for Women and a Soft Spot for Single Moms." Her book, Living, Learning, Loving, published by Morgan James Publishing, is available on Barnes & Noble and wherever books are sold. She counts herself a fortunate woman, remarried and still passionate about single mothers. Connect with Gail: Website [https://www.gailshowalter.com/] Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61575903206005] Instagram [ https://www.instagram.com/gail_cawley/?hl=en] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/gail-showalter-9a37a822/] YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@gailshowalter1889] Resources:  https://www.singlemomsempowered.org/ [https://www.singlemomsempowered.org/] The  Jeremiah Program [https://jeremiahprogram.org/] Buckner [https://www.buckner.org/] Books mentioned: Living, Learning, Loving: Lessons of Insight and Encouragement on the Path of Motherhood by Gail Cawley Showalter [ ⁠https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9781636986210⁠] Wired That Way Florence & Marita Littauer [https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9780800725372] https://amzn.to/3Ot02Tu [https://amzn.to/3Ot02Tu] Enneagram Made Easy: Explore the Nine Personality Types of the Enneagram by Deborah Threadgill Egerton [https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9781401975890] The Adversity Advantage: Turning Everyday Struggles into Everyday Greatness by Erik Weihenmayer [https://bookshop.org/a/116550/9781439199497⁠] Podcasts mentioned:  Bent Not Broken with Deborah Griffiths [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bent-not-broken-starting-over-after-divorce-post-divorce/id1840019186] ——— If you enjoyed tuning into this podcast, then do not hesitate to write a review. You can also share this with your friends so that they can be educated, informed, inspired and empowered! Contact me through my website, PocketsofKnowledge.com, or find me on Instagram @desireedstanley. Thanks for listening! ——— This podcast is intended to educate, inspire, and empower you on your personal journey. Please note that individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.