Understanding the Enneagram: Mistyping
UNDERSTANDING THE ENNEAGRAM: MISTYPING
Your Enneagram number comes from your own internal motivation. So, Amanda and I could do the very same things and even seem very similar, but our underlying reasons, our only-known-to-us rationale for doing that thing, is always going to be different.
That's right. Amanda is coming from the perspective of a Type Seven, where she wants to have options and keep everything open. On the other hand, I approach things from a place of needing to feel competent, understand, and have the information to make a decision. It may look the same from the outside, but our motivations are distinct.
It's common to want to type our friends and family, but what we should do is have a conversation and give them the tools to understand the Enneagram. We can't force it upon them just because we're excited about it. Self-discovery should be a personal journey.
Absolutely. If you find yourself thinking your spouse or partner belongs to a particular type, it can be useful to reflect on how you perceive your relationship. But remember, it's essential to keep the focus on self-reflection. Typing someone else often leads to mistyping.
So, what is mistyping? Essentially, it occurs when we fail to uncover the core fears, desires, and lost childhood messages of a person. If we only look at surface-level behavioral characteristics, we are prone to mistyping. Some types may struggle with vulnerability and authenticity, preventing them from embracing their true Enneagram type.
That's true. It's crucial to go beyond surface observations and delve into deeper motivations. As a rule of thumb, if discovering your Enneagram type makes you uncomfortable or even nauseous, it might be an indication that you're on the right track.
Let's take Type Three as an example. If you're a Three and you're addicted to being seen as successful and a winner, it can be challenging to give up that persona. Similarly, for women, societal expectations often reinforce certain roles, like being the best helper. A Three may resist acknowledging their true motivations because it feels vulnerable and exposes their desire for external validation.
Absolutely. Another example is Type Sixes who don't want to think of themselves as negative or pessimistic. They may believe they're doing everyone a favor by constantly anticipating potential problems. However, in reality, they are wasting valuable energy on hypothetical scenarios that rarely come to fruition.
Mistyping can also occur when we only see someone in specific contexts or under certain circumstances. For instance, if we only see a friend in a relaxed environment, we may assume they are a Type Nine. But when they are in a professional setting or under stress, we witness a completely different side of them, revealing a different Enneagram type.
That's right. People can adapt their behavior to fit different situations or adopt a specific mode under stress. It's important to recognize that we may not have a complete understanding of someone's Enneagram type based on limited observations.
Self-reflection plays a significant role in understanding our Enneagram type. For example, as a Type Five, if I feel confident in a leadership role, people who only know me in that context may think it's my true nature. They might be surprised to learn that it's just one aspect of who I am.
It's essential to approach the Enneagram with humility and an open mind. Avoid labeling others and instead focus on self-discovery. By understanding our own motivations and fears, we can gain a deeper understanding of ourselves and our relationships.
RECAP
Mistyping occurs when we fail to uncover the core fears, desires, and motivations of individuals in the Enneagram system.
It is important not to try to type other people but rather encourage self-reflection and provide them with tools to explore their own Enneagram type.
Mistyping often happens when we focus on surface-level behaviors or fail to recognize the complexity and adaptability of individuals in different contexts.
Embracing vulnerability and self-reflection is key to discovering our true Enneagram type and understanding ourselves better.
Remember, the Enneagram is a tool for personal growth and self-awareness, and mistyping can hinder the journey of self-discovery.
