Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown Podcast

Radio Free Roscoe, Episode 13: Sports Ray-dio

Welcome back to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown! Today we recap Radio Free Roscoe, episode 13, “Sports Ray-dio.” And just in time for the end of RFR season 1, TBTB is going on an indefinite hiatus: Funemployment ends tomorrow, and since this started as a funemployment project, that means changes are coming around here too. So without further adieu, our last episode for probably at least a little while. Immediately after an RFR recording, Ray expresses his frustration with the show’s low listenership and having to keep his identity secret - he wants his fans to know who he is! Travis plays an applause-and-cheers sound effect; while that’s not enough for Ray, who then races off with Robbie to the Cougar basketball game, it’s a good stand-in for Lily, who strums her guitar and shouts “Good night Roscoe, I love you!” Robbie and Ray hang around in the gym after the game, pretending to commentate themselves shooting the winning basket. Kim Carlisle catches them, but instead of teasing them about it, she says that Cougar Radio is looking for a basketball reporter and asks Ray if he’s interested. Robbie tries to interject and say Ray would never work for the enemy, but Ray stays quiet as Kim tells him to think about it - seems he will. Looks like Ray took Kim up on her offer - he’s broadcasting over the intercom for a whole two minutes as the other three sit in the cafeteria perplexed. It doesn’t help that Ray totally checks out of that afternoon’s RFR broadcast as he preps for the next day’s “Basket Babble,” forcing Travis to pick up the slack. After fellow freshman Todd Bell scores the winning basket in the Cougars’ next game, Ray is able to snag him as a guest on Basket Babble, which scores him a Cougar Radio varsity jacket from Kim Carlisle. And after that, Ray gets lunch with Todd, forgetting that he’d had plans with Robbie. Robbie’s confidence that Ray will be back to his normal self soon may be waning… Sure enough, Ray is late to that afternoon’s RFR, and doesn’t even go on air - he only stopped by to let them know he has to go do an interview for Cougar Radio so can’t do his segment. He tries to bribe them for forgiveness with drinks (don’t worry, just coffee, hot chocolate and tea) at Mickey’s later, swearing on their friendship that he’ll give RFR his undivided attention, but of course that’s when some of the basketball team comes in. Robbie and Lily tell Ray to go ahead and sit with them, so he does after double-checking that it’s okay, but this might be a situation where even though they said “yes” he probably should have taken it as a “no.” Ray’s a Cougar Radio hit, so Kim tells him he needs to start going on the air after school. He tries to say “no” for about a minute so he can keep doing RFR too, but as soon as a girl draws a heart on the radio booth window, he caves and tells Kim he’s in. He goes on that very afternoon, as a perturbed Robbie and Lily listen to his broadcast from the RFR studio. Robbie winds up confronting Ray at Mickey’s, saying, “I’ve been your best friend your entire life. We’ve been through everything together, and now you’re acting like you have no use for me or RFR anymore.” Ray doesn’t take it well, as he responds, “I’m sorry you can’t even be happy for me. It must suck to see your best friend become a radio star when that’s all you’ve ever wanted to do.” Robbie insists he’s not jealous, as Cougar Radio gives you no freedom to tell the truth. Ray doesn’t see it that way and likes that when he’s on Cougar Radio, everyone knows who he is, but Robbie’s answer to that is, “Everyone but me.” The Cougars lose for the first time since Ray started giving his takes, and the team is NOT happy with his on-air post-game analysis. While he’s broadcasting, they come in and wrap him up like a mummy, tying him to his chair, which is apparently a pretty typical hazing ritual for them. Our other three teens hear it from the RFR studio, and Robbie immediately leaves to go check on his friend, even as he’s upset with him (Travis had a little talk with him earlier that maybe stuck more than he realized). Kim finds Ray first, yet somehow isn’t upset with what the team did. Ray tries to say he was just telling the truth, but Kim says, “The key word at Cougar Radio is ‘cougar.’ We don’t say bad things about our teams.” Eventually, Ray somehow gets himself untied and finds Todd in the gym. He tries to apologize, saying he rags on his friends when they screw up sometimes, but all Todd can say is, “No offense, but what makes you think we’re friends?” As Todd leaves, Robbie comes in and starts an apology of his own, sharing that he was a little jealous. Ray reciprocates, saying that in his efforts to rise to the top, he’s realized that “being a somebody makes you a nobody if you can’t tell it like it is.” Travis and Lily are on air by themselves, and let’s just say the conversation skills of the other two are SORELY missed, so Robbie’s and Ray’s return comes at just the right time. Thanks for being here! We may eventually be back on Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown. Get full access to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown at hannamfogel.substack.com/subscribe [https://hannamfogel.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Radio Free Roscoe, Episode 12: Call of the Cougar

Welcome back to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown! Today we recap Radio Free Roscoe, episode 12, “Call of the Cougar.” Ray is still rehearsing how to ask Lily out, while Lily herself spills to Robbie that she also has a crush, though she won’t say on whom. She accidentally leaves her Discman behind when she leaves, though, and Robbie opens it to find a CD labeled “Songs for ?”, which he takes to mean “Songs for Question Mark” aka himself… In the school cafeteria the next day, Ray and most of the rest of the students are excited for a big Roscoe High Cougars vs. Logan High Eagles football game at the end of the week, but Travis doesn’t get the hype. Apparently it annoys a football player named Carter enough that he threatens Travis to do the Cougar Hand Jive or he’ll “make him do it.” Travis could stand to get off his high horse, but threats are definitely also going too far. And then the guy wants Ray to steal the mascot costume so they can pretend Logan did it - there has got to be a middle ground between these extremes, which I suppose is the point of the episode. Lily and Robbie hang out in Lily’s room, and there are SO MANY MIXED SIGNALS. Robbie thinks Lily is acting flirty, but then he sees photo booth pictures of her with Ray and Travis (separately) and none with him, feels confused, and dips. Travis finds out that Ray has been set up as part of the “steal the mascot” plot. He somehow finds a clown wig and foam fingers that he’s able to pass off to Ray so he can try and clean up the mess. But the football players took the storage room key Ray was planning on using, so it’s all up to Travis now. At the pep rally, Robbie almost puts his arm around or holds hands with Lily several times, but keeps chickening out. Good thing, because she eventually reveals she likes a long-haired drummer who’s definitely not Robbie. Ray is about to tell Principal Waller that he stole the mascot when all of a sudden, said cougar makes his way into the gym! We all know it’s Travis inside, so when he kicks the head off an eagle pinata, and looks like he has fun doing so, it’s a nice surprise. Waller is at first upset that the cougar, Crunch, appeared unsportsmanlike, but he had wanted Travis to have more school spirit, so instead of a punishment, Travis gets to be the mascot now! Which may be punishment in itself. On RFR, Lily reveals that she went on a date with “the drummer dude,” which unfortunately for her didn’t go so well, so she’d love to not listen to any music with drums for a while. So of course, the next song the station plays is the drum-filled Roscoe High Cougars fight song, and the boys all air-drum along. Don’t change that channel! We’ll be right back on Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown. Get full access to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown at hannamfogel.substack.com/subscribe [https://hannamfogel.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Radio Free Roscoe, Episode 11: My Pal Pronto

Welcome back to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown! Today we recap Radio Free Roscoe, episode 11, “My Pal Pronto.” The full first two minutes of the episode are about updating the greeting on an answering machine and how one answers a phone line shared by the entire household - oh, those were the days. This segues into another conversation about how strict Ray’s dad is, and that determines today’s RFR topic: When is it okay to say no to a parent? Time for storytime with Ray: with Robbie as his witness, at dinner last night he got an ultimatum to either shave his sideburns or not be in this year’s family photo at all (which does seem harsh). What’ll happen tonight when he’s by himself? All will be revealed in tomorrow’s My Pal Pronto segment. As Ray tells it, during dinner, his dad steals the last piece of meatloaf out from under him (literally off his plate!) and then rubs it in by gushing about it to Ray’s mom, the cook (and also calls her “mother” - he’s definitely giving Mike Pence). Apparently by refusing to shave his sideburns, Ray set an example of selfishness, so now it’s every man for himself. As it usually does, Ray’s nervous energy leads to him making a joke, as he says to his dad, “If you try to take my dessert from me, I’m sending you to your room,” which only leads Ray to be sent to his room instead, with an admonishment to “think long and hard about what it means to belong to this family.” It would be easier for the viewers and for Ray to fully dismiss Ray’s dad if the man was wholly robotic, but he shows small signs of being human: He brings Ray’s dessert up to Ray’s room for him, responds to Ray’s “what did you do to it?” question with an appropriate amount of sarcasm, and he and Ray continue what’s clearly an ongoing inside joke to see who can come up with the punniest “home run call.” But then at one instance of Ray trying to assert himself (and maybe calling his dad the selfish one for making everyone adhere to his wishes), the man escalates so quickly to, “If you’re not happy abiding by the family rules, maybe you’d prefer to not be a member of this family and be a boarder in this house instead,” it’s almost whiplash-inducing. And Ray takes him up on it: He does have to pay for his own food, but won’t have to pay rent or follow any other rules. Time to see what freedom tastes like! From Ray’s POV, we get a montage where it looks like he’s having the time of his life. But at RFR, Robbie notes that he’s worn the same shirt for days and Lily mentions he’s starting to smell. He also didn’t get Robbie’s call the night before because he doesn’t get access to the phone until he pays his portion of the bill. At this point, the others try to convince him to just do what his dad wants, but Ray’s having too much to fun to stop just yet. Once Robbie and Lily are too busy to hang out because they’re spending time with their families, though, reality comes crashing in. Ray heads to the RFR studio late at night, where he inadvertently wakes up Travis, who was also there but attempting to sleep. Seems Travis’s parents don’t give him any rules, but more out of neglect than Mr. Brennan’s social experiment. The result is the same, though: neither kid is as empowered as he thought he might be. Ray comes home to find his dad asleep at the kitchen table with a baseball game playing on the radio and asks, “You weren’t waiting up for me, were you?” His dad halfheartedly responds, “Why would I worry about a boarder?” but any aloofness doesn’t land. He offers Ray some mac and cheese (a welcome relief from the cake Ray’s been eating for days) and on the radio, a batter hits a home run, causing the father and son to high five and say, “Gone with the wind!” Ray’s dad then says, “It seems silly we’ve spent so long fighting over sideburns,” which seems like a good start, until he says, “So what do you say I go downstairs and get my barber scissors?” So it’s still his way or the highway. Ray comes back with, “While you’re there, why don’t you grab a highchair and burp cloth while you’re at it?” Mr. Brennan says he just wants Ray to “look like a Brennan,” but Ray calls his dad out for not wanting him to grow up and thus not wanting him to make his own decisions, even about things like facial hair. He jokes about still having the mind of a ten-year-old, which oddly enough seems to make his dad feel better. Mr. Brennan then says when he was Ray’s age, he had the worst sideburns the planet had ever seen, which may also explain part of his stubbornness on this issue. He tells Ray he can keep the sideburns - but take a shower. On the next RFR, though, the sideburns are gone! Maybe because it was Ray’s own choice as opposed to a decree from his father, maybe reverse psychology worked on him. But deep down, Ray still wants to be close to his dad. After all this sweetness, the rest of the gang can’t help but tease him that they wish he hadn’t shaved, though of course it’s all in good fun. Don’t change that channel! We’ll be right back on Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown. Get full access to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown at hannamfogel.substack.com/subscribe [https://hannamfogel.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Radio Free Roscoe, Episode 10: Crush Me

Welcome back to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown! Today we recap Radio Free Roscoe, episode 10, “Crush Me.” Lily grabs a tab off a flyer for guitar lessons at Mickey’s. At that moment, Ray finally works up the courage to ask her out, but of course it’s right when she’s on the phone scheduling her first lesson for right now. He walks her to the classroom, but she might have a crush on her teacher instead! Sure enough, at school, Ray continues to try and hint his way to asking Lily out, but she’s busy with either lessons with Jack (the guitar teacher) or working on what Jack has taught her. She starts getting down on herself about how Jack would never see her as more than a pathetic 14-year-old; Ray hypes her up, but instead of realizing that’s actually how Ray feels, she just sees the surface level “Jack is lucky to have me!” So when Jack invites Lily to come see him play at Mickey’s the next night, it’s a pretty sure bet that Lily is going to read more into it than he actually means. Supposedly nonathletic Travis beats Robbie at HORSE, which means he gets to “torpedo” Robbie (kind of like a one-hit dodgeball game), which Robbie hasn’t lost in ages, but he does this time, and is the biggest sore loser there ever was, even airing it out on RFR. Robbie tries to get back at Travis by arm wrestling, but Travis wins that too, and Robbie doesn’t take it well. They then fight to see who can hold their breath the longest, on RFR, making for terrible radio. Lily, still in the Jack haze, dedicates a song on RFR to “a cool friend on a special night.” Ray had also asked her if she “wanted to do something later” and she said yes - does he think it’s about him? Probably, because when Ray later asks Lily what she wants to do that night, and she says “Go to Mickey’s to see Jack play at open mic,” he looks pretty devastated. And then he has to watch her listen to Jack sing, “I’ve never felt this way before” and other love song lyrics, which must be a special kind of torture. Another kind of torture: when you give your guitar teacher a box you decorated to keep his guitar pics in and then his girlfriend comes up, kisses him and says, “Babe, I love it when you play that song.” Oh, Lily. The mood of the music on the next day’s RFR has shifted from love songs to angsty breakups. She rants to the others, “One day, you’ll fall for someone and they won’t even see you,” - I think Ray knows a little bit about how that feels. He even gives her “flicorice” (flowers made of licorice) later and says “One day you’ll turn around and your soulmate will be right behind you.” But when she grumbles, “He’ll never be as cool as Jack,” Ray says, “If that’s how you feel, then you deserve to be hurt, because you don’t have a clue about anyone else’s feelings except your own.” The next day, though, Ray apologizes, wishing he could take his words back and saying, “The truth is, I admire what you did. You felt a certain way about Jack and you let him know.” Lily retorts, “Yeah, and look where it got me,” to which Ray responds, “You could have been stuck in a crush going nowhere, but now you’re free. I wish I had your courage.” She asks what he’s afraid of, and he says “You…” but immediately turns that into a babble about yew trees. He tells her to “write a kickin’ song about this experience,” and she kisses him on the cheek when she thanks him for cheering her up - he’s so done for. Robbie and Travis have another HORSE-Torpedo rematch, but even though Travis wins HORSE and has the chance to torpedo Robbie, Robbie catches Travis’s ball, which means he wins that part of the game and all is right in his world again. Did Travis perhaps let him win to save their friendship? More likely than not. Don’t change that channel! We’ll be right back on Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown. Get full access to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown at hannamfogel.substack.com/subscribe [https://hannamfogel.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Radio Free Roscoe, Episode 9: Detention Redemption

Welcome back to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown! Today we recap Radio Free Roscoe, episode 9, “Detention Redemption.” Cell phones and pagers (!) are no longer allowed on school property because of how distracting they’ve become, and the RFR teens call this a draconian decree that’s taking away their freedom. (Watching this 20+ years later when this debate is still happening and I can kind of see the value of putting your phone away makes me feel very old, but I digress). From his office, Waller is listening to the teens imitate him while scowling and squeezing a stress ball. The next day, loophole #1 has perhaps been found: Travis and Ray bring in walkie-talkies (presumably they weren’t explicitly mentioned in the ban). But that doesn’t matter, as Waller catches Ray immediately and just as quickly gives him detention for breaking the rule. Travis tries to go the pedantic route, and he gets detention too. Of course, that’s right when Robbie starts speaking into his walkie talkie from around the corner, and he also gets caught. Ray starts muttering a Waller imitation under his breath, to which Waller snaps, “Cut that out, pronto.” Pronto is Ray’s DJ name - it seems like this may have been innocent from Waller as opposed to a veiled “I know your secret,” but it’s hard to say. That afternoon, not only is Robbie stressed that this is his first detention, but if they don’t go on air, Waller is going to know they’re part of RFR. But he can’t devise a plan because just as he begins to ponder, a goth girl named Maggie comes into the detention classroom, and they don’t want to give themselves away. But somehow, right after that, Waller brings Lily into the room, who’s asking, “Where in the student code does it say ‘No running in the halls?’” but he shuts her down with. “Page one. Now, wouldn’t it be fun if we caught all four Radio Free Roscoe DJs at the same time? For your sakes, I hope you’re not responsible for RFR.” Waller leaves the room, and Maggie reveals that she’s in detention for breaking and entering into Waller’s office - the proof: Travis’s walkie talkie. She’s in detention quite a bit, so she’s been able to track Waller’s patterns and knows for a fact that he listens to RFR. So if one of them doesn’t make it to the studio to put on an old broadcast, they’re definitely in trouble. When Maggie leaves the room to get a soda, that’s their sign, and off Travis runs. Maggie arrives before Travis does, and according to her, it’s almost time for a room check - uh oh. But in those fifteen seconds, the teens somehow manage to drape a hoodie over a plastic skeleton that happened to be in the room and pull one over on Waller. Meanwhile, Travis did make it back (after causing several distractions to do so), but remembers that Robbie had taken all the prerecorded broadcasts home to relabel them - what now? He starts playing an oldies CD - that’ll have to do. But then one of the songs starts skipping, so Robbie pretends like he’s going to the bathroom, and off to the studio he goes. Robbie’s solution? They’ll need to go on live over the walkie talkies. But then Lily and Ray break the one they have after tussling with it, and are now on a mission to find duct tape. They find some in the janitor’s closet, but get closed in by said janitor who’s cheerily whistling while taking his break. And while Robbie has now made his way back, Maggie informs him and Travis that Waller will be making his rounds again any minute, so why aren’t Ray and Lily there yet? While Robbie and Travis go to find their friends (though it turns out Lily and Ray are able to get themselves out by yelling at the janitor [who then opens the door] and pretend they were making out [Ray wishes]) and very very quickly fix the broken walkie talkie, Maggie acts as a distraction. Success! When Waller turns on his radio, the teens are talking about how a campus cell phone ban is too far, but “no cell phones in class” is a reasonable compromise. Waller may think so too, as when he frees the students from detention and Travis asks about the ban, he says, “I’ll think about it,” which Maggie translates to “Give me a day to make it look like it was my idea.” Maggie then points out to Lily that she sees how Lily looks at Ray, and she knows Lily sees how Ray looks at her - Lily might be in total denial, but we as the audience can definitely see where this is heading. Don’t change that channel! We’ll be right back on Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown. Get full access to Teeny Bopper TV Breakdown at hannamfogel.substack.com/subscribe [https://hannamfogel.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]