EP. 41 – You're Already Being Influenced. Here's How to Use It.

EP. 41 – You're Already Being Influenced. Here's How to Use It.

You think you're making your own decisions. You're not — at least not entirely. Influence is happening all around us, all the time. In the campaigns you scroll past. In the defaults you never question. In the room you walk into and the way you introduce yourself. And if you're not aware of it, you're being shaped by it without even knowing. This week, I'm joined by Dr. Gillian Brooks, Associate Professor of Marketing at King's Business School, Director of the Executive MBA programme, and one of the leading researchers on influence, social media, and persuasion. She also happened to be my professor this semester.  We talked about what influence actually is, the ethics of it, how to use it intentionally in your career, and why being ambitious and confused doesn't mean you're behind — it means you're paying attention.  IN THIS EPISODE, YOU'LL LEARN: * Why influence isn't just for charismatic people and how it's already shaping your decisions without you realising it * What the Obama campaign can teach you about building credibility and community from scratch * Where the line is between strategic influence and manipulation (and why it matters for your career) * What "celebrity capital" actually is and how to build yours even if you have zero followers * Why "just be yourself" is incomplete advice and what authentic influence actually looks like * How to advocate for yourself in salary negotiations using data, confidence, and timing * What AI is changing about influence, and how to protect yourself from it 💬 QUOTE OF THE EPISODE –  "You're not outside of influence. You're already inside it. The only question is whether you're doing it on purpose." — Dr. Gillian Brooks TIMESTAMPS 00:00 — Introduction: You're already being influenced  00:37 — Why charisma has nothing to do with it  01:32 — Gillian's career arc and what she learned from every pivot  02:58 — From publicist in Toronto to PhD at Cambridge  05:31 — Inside the Obama campaign: influence at scale  09:10 — The mere exposure effect and the power of consistency  10:45 — Influence vs. manipulation: where's the line?  11:24 — Cambridge Analytica: data, targeting, and non-consensual nudging  14:21 — Celebrity capital explained: social, cultural, symbolic  17:23 — How social media changed the rules of influence  19:54 — Building expertise early in your career  21:57 — Navigating choice overload  26:11 — Gender and negotiation  27:03 — How to negotiate your salary with data and confidence  30:49 — AI, deepfakes, and media literacy  42:01 — Who are you clearly becoming? RESOURCES * Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion — Robert Cialdini [https://dn710600.ca.archive.org/0/items/ThePsychologyOfPersuasion/The%20Psychology%20of%20Persuasion.pdf] * The Power of Who Gets Heard and Why — Deborah Tannen [https://hbr.org/1995/09/the-power-of-talk-who-gets-heard-and-why] * Cambridge Analytica — BBC Documentary [https://www.bbc.com/news/newsbeat-49085306] * Dr. Gillian Brooks — King's Business School: https://www.kcl.ac.uk/people/gillian-brooks [https://www.kcl.ac.uk/people/gillian-brooks] This is your reminder that you can be ambitious and confused. DM Hazel Ann on Instagram your ONE non-negotiable habit and the WORD that describes who you are clearly becoming. CONNECT WITH HAZEL ANN * Instagram: @clearlybecoming * TikTok: @clearlybecoming_ * YouTube: youtube.com/@clearlybecoming Host: Hazel Ann | Clearly Becoming Guest Episode: ft. Dr. Gillian Brooks

EP 40 – Reframing Luck: How Hard Work and Mindset Shape Success

EP. 40 – Reframing Luck: How Hard Work and Mindset Shape Success  Host: Hazel Ann | Clearly Becoming · Solo Episode have you ever looked at someone else's success and thought… wow, they just got lucky? what if luck is not something that happens to you — but something you actually build? in this episode, i am getting into the psychology behind luck, success, and why the most 'fortunate' people aren't just stumbling into opportunity — they are creating the conditions for it. this is for every ambitious, confused twenty-something who has ever felt like success is happening for everyone except them. spoiler: it is not about luck. it is about locus. IN THIS EPISODE, YOU'LL LEARN: * why your perception of luck is shaping the opportunities you notice — or miss * the psychology of internal vs external locus of control and why it changes everything * how self-efficacy and resilience are the quiet engines behind every 'lucky break' * how to recognise opportunities you are currently walking straight past * why preparation × opportunity = luck (and what that actually means for your career) 💬 QUOTE OF THE EPISODE – "Luck favours the prepared mind." — Louis Pasteurif that isn't your era, i don't know what is. TIMESTAMPS 00:00  Luck vs. Hard Work: The Great Debate 04:00  Understanding Locus of Control 10:49  The Role of Perspective in Luck 14:43  Building Your Internal Locus of Control 18:40  Redefining Luck: Preparation Meets Opportunity RESOURCES * Locus of Control (Julian Rotter, 1966) – Social learning theory * Three Biases That Hold Us Back From Having More Serendipity [https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/three-biases-hold-us-back-from-having-more-how-overcome-busch/]  * Fundamental [https://robertglazer.substack.com/p/fundamental-attribution-error-leadership] Attribution Error  RELEVANT EPISODES * Ep 29 - How to become before you believe it  [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAdaxXFWuNI&t=27s] * EP 16 — How Believing in yourself unlocks new opportunities  [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ge-D3Py1Fh0] This is your reminder that you can be ambitious and confused. DM Hazel Ann on Instagram your ONE non-negotiable habit and the WORD that describes who you are clearly becoming. CONNECT WITH HAZEL ANN * Instagram: @clearlybecoming * TikTok: @clearlybecoming_ * YouTube: youtube.com/@clearlybecoming

EP 39 – When Getting There Feels Wrong: Navigating the Emotional Cycle of Transition

You hit the goal. You made the move. You got the thing — and then the overwhelm hit harder than the excitement.  If that's where you are right now, this episode is your map.In this episode, Hazel Ann breaks down the emotional cycle of change: a five-stage framework that explains why ambition and anxiety aren't opposites — and why feeling like you're falling apart might actually mean you're right on track.  This isn't about pushing through. It's about knowing where you are so you can move with intention, not fear. IN THIS EPISODE, YOU'LL LEARN: *  Why achieving your goal can trigger self-doubt, overwhelm, and imposter phenomenon — and why that's neurologically normal * The five stages of the emotional cycle of change: from uninformed optimism to the valley of despair to earned confidence * How to recognise which stage you're in right now — and what to do instead of spiral * The neuroscience of stress (the HPA axis, cortisol, and your negativity bias) explained without the jargon * How to use micro-wins, sensory grounding, and effort-focused reframes to rebuild momentum * Why detaching from outcomes isn't giving up — it's how you keep going 💬 QUOTE OF THE EPISODE – "Feeling like you're falling apart might mean you're right where growth lives. The valley of despair isn't failure — it's the stage before informed optimism. You're not behind. You're in it." TIMESTAMPS 00:00 – Why success can trigger overwhelm 00:36 – Introducing the emotional cycle of change 02:08 – Personal transition stories: job search, moving, studying abroad 04:15 – Stage 1: Uninformed optimism 05:27 – Stage 2: Informed pessimism — when reality sets in 07:47 – Stage 3: The valley of despair — what it looks like and why it's normal 09:19 – Strategies for pushing through the valley 13:05 – The neuroscience of stress: cortisol, HPA axis & negativity bias 15:01 – Practical tools: breathing, grounding, micro-wins 17:10 – Reframing goals and fixing focus on effort, not outcomes 20:10 – Consistent action and controlling what you can 24:00 – Becoming someone who moves forward without all the answers 26:07 – How to identify your current stage and what to do next RESOURCES * The Neuroscience of Stress & Cortisol  [https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5954619] * Abramson's Hopelessness Theory * Micro-Wins Strategy (Seth Godin) RELEVANT EPISODES * EP 31: You Don't Rise to Your Goals. You Fall to Your Systems  [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rykIgkvcj-s] * EP 32:  How to Become Before You Believe It [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAdaxXFWuNI&t=19s]  This is your reminder that you can be ambitious and confused. DM Hazel Ann on Instagram your ONE non-negotiable habit and the WORD that describes who you are clearly becoming. CONNECT WITH HAZEL ANN * Instagram: @clearlybecoming * TikTok: @clearlybecoming_ * YouTube: youtube.com/@clearlybecoming

EP 38 - Consistency Creates Clarity

You've been told to get clear, then get consistent. But what if it works the other way around? This week, Erica Somer — marketer, co-founder of HOM, photographer, DJ, and aspiring author — joins Hazel Ann to unpack what it actually means to build momentum before you have a destination. If you're sitting on six passions and zero direction, this one's for you. Host: Hazel Ann | Clearly Becoming · Guest Episode ft. Erica Somer IN THIS EPISODE, YOU'LL LEARN: * Why waiting to "get clear" before starting is the trap keeping you stuck * How consistency works as a mirror — not a goal — and what it reveals about who you're becoming * What friction-maxxing is and why making things harder on purpose actually accelerates identity change * The neuroscience behind identity encoding — why "I am someone who shows up" rewires your brain differently than "I'm trying to" * How to embrace being multihyphenate without feeling like you're betraying any one part of yourself * The embarrassingly small first step for anyone with multiple interests and no clear path QUOTE OF THE EPISODE * "It's not that deep." – Erica Somer TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Introduction — the contradiction at the heart of this episode04:55 Vancouver → Paris → London: what she was chasing and did she find it?09:16 Defining the multihyphenate and building HOM from a dinner party14:15 Consistency as a mirror, not a goal26:14 The best habit she ever built — and how it actually stuck31:11 Friction-maxxing: when ease is the enemy35:56 Identity encoding and the 800-day Duolingo domino effect40:54 For the person with six interests and zero direction48:50 What she's being consistent about with no clear payoff yet50:45 The 11-day challenge + clarity round RESOURCES * Atomic Habits by James Clear — https://www.amazon.com/Atomic-Habits-Proven-Bep-Change/dp/0735211299 [https://www.amazon.com/Atomic-Habits-Proven-Bep-Change/dp/0735211299] * The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg — https://www.amazon.com/Power-Habit-What-Life-Business/dp/081298160X [https://www.amazon.com/Power-Habit-What-Life-Business/dp/081298160X] * Range by David Epstein — https://www.amazon.com/Range-Why-Generalists-Win-Science/dp/0735214484 [https://www.amazon.com/Range-Why-Generalists-Win-Science/dp/0735214484] * What Is Identity Encoding and Why It Works Where Affirmations Don't — [link [https://www.encoded.ai/blog/what-is-identity-encoding]] * Role Models, Motivation and Inspiration — https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/fulfillment-at-any-age/201311/we-all-need-role-models-to-motivate-and-inspire-us [https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/fulfillment-at-any-age/201311/we-all-need-role-models-to-motivate-and-inspire-us] CONNECT WITH ERICA SOMER Instagram: @erica_somer [https://www.instagram.com/erica_somer/#] HOM: @wearehouseofmarketing [https://www.instagram.com/wearehouseofmarketing/]  Substack: @erierierieri This is your reminder that you can be ambitious and confused. DM Hazel Ann on Instagram your ONE non-negotiable habit and the word that describes who you are clearly becoming. CONNECT WITH HAZEL ANN Instagram: @clearlybecoming TikTok: @clearlybecoming_ YouTube: youtube.com/@clearlybecoming

EP 37 – Is loving your work the same as losing yourself?

EP 37 – Is loving your work the same as losing yourself? Host: Hazel Ann | Clearly Becoming · Solo Episode You've been told Gen Z is lazy. Quiet quitting. Bare minimum Mondays. Disengaged. But what if I told you that Gen Z cares so much, so deeply, about the right work, that they have actually started to lose track of where the work ends and you begin? This episode is about that line. The one between loving what you do and being consumed by it. Between choosing your life and drifting into it while being very, very good at it. We're going there via The Devil Wears Prada (that’s right, Miranda, Andy, Emily) and the neuroscience and psychology that explains why even purpose-driven ambition can become a trap. Especially in your twenties, when the developmental task is to keep exploring who you are — not lock it down. IN THIS EPISODE, YOU'LL LEARN: * The real difference between Miranda Priestly and Emily — and why it's not about work ethic * Why purpose-driven workaholism is harder to spot (it feels righteous) * The dopamine loop behind "one more email", and why Miranda isn't disciplined, she's wired in * What identity foreclosure is, and why your 20s are the highest-risk window for it * The hedonic treadmill: why the reward always moves, and what that means for how you're measuring success How to tell the difference between harmonious passion and obsessive passion, from the inside * Three questions to ask yourself this week: not to work less, but to work with more awareness 💬 QUOTE OF THE EPISODE – "Working hard is not the same as losing yourself. But in your twenties, you have to be awake enough to know the difference." TIMESTAMPS 0:00 — Nigel's quote + the question this episode is really asking 01:30 — Miranda, Andy, Emily: three archetypes, one question — which one are you? 03:00 — Gen Z data: 89% purpose-driven, 44% have quit for lack of meaning, 41% tie identity to work 04:30 — The risk isn't working hard. The risk is mistaking intensity for meaning. 05:00 — The dopamine loop: why stimulating work activates the same pathways as compulsive behaviour 06:30 — Identity foreclosure: what Erikson says about committing too early to one identity 08:00 — The hedonic treadmill: each win raises the baseline. You don't arrive. 09:00 — Harmonious vs obsessive passion — and how Miranda crossed from one to the other 10:00 — The Gen Z version of the trap: when your side hustle is your passion, boundaries feel like betrayal 10:30 — Three tests: can you set it down? Who are you without it? Did you choose this? 13:30 — The clarity round + what Hazel Ann is letting go of 14:30 — Clearly becoming… the narrator of my own life RESOURCES * Erikson's Stages of Psychosocial Development [https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK556096/]— identity vs role confusion * Harmonious vs Obsessive Passion — Vallerand et al. (2003) [https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/14561128/] * Deloitte Global Gen Z and Millennial Survey 2025 [https://www.deloitte.com/global/en/issues/work/genz-millennial-survey.html] * Dopamine and Reward Pathways — Psychology Today [https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/no-more-fomo/202505/driven-to-excess-the-role-of-dopamine] RELEVANT EPISODES * EP 22 – How Personal Branding Creates Career Clarity in Your 20s [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YRbsJCHmZsE&t=5s] * EP 29 - How to Become Before You Believe It [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAdaxXFWuNI] This is your reminder that you can be ambitious and confused. DM Hazel Ann on Instagram your ONE non-negotiable habit and the WORD that describes who you are clearly becoming. CONNECT WITH HAZEL ANN * Instagram: @clearlybecoming * TikTok: @clearlybecoming_ * YouTube: youtube.com/@clearlybecoming