Is The Village Gone Or Are We Afraid To Ask For Help?

The Mom Friends Who Become Family

Mom friends can be lifesavers—or leave you completely drained. In this episode, Kouelee and Andrea dive into the complicated world of mom friendships: how they're formed, why some last a lifetime, and why others fade away. From awkward playground small talk and birthday party anxiety to finding the people you trust with your children, they explore what makes a true mom friend. The conversation touches on parenting differences, trust, sleepovers, raising kids in Europe versus America, friendship after divorce, and the challenge of making meaningful connections as an introvert. Most importantly, they discuss how the best mom friendships often evolve into something much deeper: real friendship. Whether you have one trusted mom friend or a whole village, this episode is a reminder that the right people make motherhood a little less lonely. 00:00 – Welcome back + the mom friend who recharged your battery 04:30 – Trust, playdates, and parenting differently than we were raised 09:00 – What makes a truly great mom friend? 13:00 – Why making mom friends as an adult feels so hard 18:00 – The different roles mom friends play in our lives 22:00 – Losing friendships, outgrowing people, and friendship after divorce 27:00 – Sleepovers, trust, and finding your parenting village 30:00 – Making mom friends as an introvert 31:30 – Final thoughts on friendship, community, and motherhood #MomFriends #MotherhoodUnfiltered #MomsSupportingMoms #VillageMindset #FriendshipAfterKids #FindingYourVillage #IntrovertMom #RealMotherhood #MomConversations #ShesNotDonePodcast Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done. xxx Andrea & Kouelee Here is where you can find us online: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/ [https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/] Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod [https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod] Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod [https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod] Linktree: https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio [https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio]

Is The Village Gone Or Are We Afraid To Ask For Help?

In this episode of She's Not Done, Andrea and Kouelee tackle a topic that resonates with so many parents and women: the village. We often hear people say, "It takes a village," but what happens when asking for help feels impossible? Is the village really gone, or have life experiences, disappointment, trust issues, guilt, and the pressure to be strong made it difficult to lean on others? Andrea shares how divorce, single parenting, and years of being let down taught her to do everything herself—until life forced her to start asking for help. Through small moments of people showing up consistently, she learned that trust can be rebuilt and that accepting support doesn't make you weak. Kouelee opens up about her struggle with vulnerability, control, and the fear of being perceived as anything less than strong. As a working mom, she discusses the guilt that comes with asking for help, the challenge of trusting others, and why she feels she hasn't fully built her own village yet. Together, they explore the many forms a village can take—from family and friends to neighbors, fellow moms, schools, daycare providers, and community connections. They discuss how villages are often built intentionally over time and how support looks different for every family. This conversation is an honest look at motherhood, trust, independence, and the courage it takes to let people show up for you. Timestamps 00:00 – Welcome back to She's Not Done 01:15 – Is the village gone, or are we afraid to ask for help? 03:30 – Why asking for help can feel like weakness 06:00 – Being let down and learning not to rely on anyone 08:45 – Trust issues, control, and doing everything yourself 11:30 – The mental load of motherhood and partnership 14:00 – Why some women struggle to be seen as vulnerable 17:15 – Building a village versus expecting one to appear 20:00 – Community, friendship, and finding support outside family 23:00 – Divorce, trust, and relearning how to lean on people 26:00 – Mom guilt and the difficulty of accepting help 28:30 – Different parenting styles and different definitions of support 30:15 – How do you build a village when trusting people is hard? 31:30 – Final thoughts: You may not have a village, but you're not alone #TheVillage #MentalLoad #MomGuilt #MotherhoodUnfiltered #MomSupport #WorkingMomLife #SingleMomLife #WomenSupportingWomen #AskingForHelp #ParentingPodcast #ShesNotDonePodcast #CommunityMatters #VulnerabilityIsStrength #TrustIssues #YouAreNotAlone. Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done. xxx Andrea & Kouelee Here is where you can find us online: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/ [https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/] Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod [https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod] Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod [https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod] Linktree: https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio [https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio]

The Mental Load Nobody Sees

In this deeply honest episode of She’s Not Done, Andrea and Kouelee unpack the invisible mental load women carry every single day — from motherhood and marriage to divorce, intrusive thoughts, burnout, resentment, and survival mode. The conversation explores how emotional overwhelm impacts both mental and physical health, why so many women feel like they have to “do it all,” and the moment many women describe as “the switch” — when they finally stop accepting less and choose peace instead. They also open up about intrusive thoughts in motherhood, feeling alone even while married, asking for help, the shame surrounding mental health struggles, and how resentment quietly builds in relationships when one partner carries the majority of the emotional labor. This episode is a reminder that mental health struggles don’t always look like a diagnosis. Sometimes it looks like exhaustion, survival mode, constant anxiety, or feeling mentally tapped out. Most importantly, it’s a reminder that you are not alone. 00:00 – Mental load, relationships, and how resentment builds 03:10 – Open tabs in motherhood and emotional overwhelm 06:25 – When stress starts affecting physical health 09:40 – “The switch” women talk about after burnout 13:20 – Mom guilt, work commitments, and balancing everything 17:15 – The school pickup story and worst-case-scenario thinking 21:40 – Intrusive thoughts in motherhood and why nobody talks about them 27:05 – Feeling alone while overwhelmed and needing help 32:15 – COVID burnout, breaking points, and survival mode 36:50 – How mental overwhelm can spiral into mental health struggles 41:10 – Scorekeeping, resentment, and carrying too much in relationships 44:20 – Supporting others through mental health struggles and reminding people they’re not alone #MentalLoad #MentalHealthAwareness #MotherhoodUnfiltered #MomLife #MentalHealthMatters #EmotionalBurnout #OverstimulatedMom #IntrusiveThoughts #MomMentalLoad #WomenSupportingWomen #MarriageTalk #DivorceHealing Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done. xxx Andrea & Kouelee Here is where you can find us online: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/ [https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/] Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod [https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod] Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod [https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod] Linktree: https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio [https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio]

Should Married Women Maintain Financial Independence?

In this deeply honest conversation, we unpack one of the most important and often avoided topics in relationships: financial independence in marriage and motherhood. What does it really mean to be financially independent in a partnership? Should couples keep money separate, combine everything, or build a hybrid system based on income percentages? We explore real-life experiences of balancing careers, motherhood, and marriage—and what happens when financial structures aren’t clearly discussed. From stay-at-home motherhood and unpaid labor, to divorce, 401Ks, and financial insecurity, this episode opens up the conversations many couples never have until it’s too late. We also dive into: * The emotional impact of not earning an income while raising children * How financial control (or lack of transparency) affects relationships * Divorce realities and rebuilding financial independence * The importance of financial literacy for women * Why “hard conversations” about money should happen early in relationships This is not about right or wrong—it’s about awareness, preparation, and empowerment. Whether you're married, divorced, a parent, or building your financial future, this episode will make you rethink how money, value, and partnership truly connect. #momlife #momstruggles #workingmom #momtruth #financialindependence  00:00 – Feeling financially “less than” in a relationship Opening reflection on self-worth and not contributing financially. 04:00 – Should women be financially independent in marriage? Debate on separate accounts vs shared money systems. 08:00 – Percentage-based financial systems in relationships How couples split expenses based on income ratios. 12:00 – The reality of being a stay-at-home parent Sacrifice, home building, and invisible labor. 16:00 – Divorce and the financial shock afterward Loss of security, income reduction, and rebuilding life. 20:00 – Unpaid labor and feeling undervalued Emotional toll of raising children without financial recognition. 24:00 – Resentment, imbalance, and communication breakdown How emotional and financial imbalance affects marriages. 28:00 – Financial literacy gaps women face Credit cards, mortgages, and lack of financial education. 32:00 – Divorce, 401Ks, and legal financial complexity Negotiations, retirement accounts, and legal systems. 36:00 – Society’s pressure on working vs staying home Judgment, expectations, and conflicting standards for women. 40:00 – Value, control, and emotional labor in relationships Feeling unseen when contributions aren’t monetary. 44:00 – Advice: financial independence & hard conversations early Why couples should plan financially for “what if” scenarios. Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done. xxx Andrea & Kouelee Here is where you can find us online: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/ [https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/] Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod [https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod] Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod [https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod] Linktree: https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio [https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio]

Introduction of Andrea & Kouelee

In this introductory episode of She’s Not Done, Andrea and Kouelee share who they are, where they come from, and why this podcast exists. From divorce and motherhood to marriage, identity, and the unspoken realities women carry, this conversation sets the tone for what’s to come: honest, unfiltered discussions about life, relationships, and everything in between. They open up about the shame and silence often surrounding divorce, marriage struggles, mom guilt, intimacy, and emotional honesty — and why they believe these topics need to be talked about more openly. The goal is simple: to create a space where women feel seen, understood, and less alone. This is not about having it all figured out — it’s about sharing life as it is. Because we’re not done. Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done. xxx Andrea & Kouelee Here is where you can find us online: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/ [https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/] Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod [https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod] Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod [https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod] Linktree: https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio [https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio]