The Forge with Tomas Mones-Cazon

Stop 'Negotiating'

15 min · 26. juni 2026
episode Stop 'Negotiating' cover

Beskrivelse

Virtue is hard enough on its own. Cold showers, prayer, training, diet, all of it comes with friction. But there's a second kind of friction nobody talks about. It's not physical. It's psychological. It's the look you get when you say no to the weekend drink. It's the "bro just take it easy" when you skip the slop and hit the gym instead.Most men don't fail because they lack conviction intellectually. They fail because the first bit of social pressure cracks them. One skipped workout becomes three. One missed prayer becomes a habit of missing. You start crying wolf to yourself, and eventually you stop believing your own promises.Aristotle said virtue requires habituation in a community that recognizes and rewards it. We are not living in that kind of society anymore. So the higher you climb, the more alone you'll feel doing it. That's not a reason to stop.In this video I cover:-the difference between physical friction and psychological friction-why the boy who cried wolf is the perfect analogy for broken discipline-Aristotle's view on virtue, habituation, and community-why weekends and modern rest culture are a societal baseline worth questioning-how to tell the difference between well-intentioned correction and noise-why fortitude is the virtue that gets you throughThe Legion: Stop doing this alone, join a brotherhood of Christian men who will hold you to the standard you already know you should be living. → https://fftkingdom.com/the-legionFFTK: Come train, pray, and build with men in person. → https://fftkingdom.com/1:1 Coaching: If you're tired of knowing exactly what you need to do and still not doing it, apply to work with me directly. → https://forgevirtue.com/Find out more: links to all my social media profiles and content can be found here. → https://linktr.ee/tomas.mones0:00 Personal Update and Injury Recovery1:02 Social Environment as Obstacle to Virtue2:30 Peer Pressure Cuts Your Intention4:33 Crying Wolf to Yourself5:35 Saying No to the Status Quo7:14 Friction Should Not Be Minimized8:08 Climbing Higher Increases Friction9:37 Discerning Valid Criticism12:18 Aristotle on Habituation13:42 Virtue of Fortitude

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80 Episoder

episode Stop 'Negotiating' cover

Stop 'Negotiating'

Virtue is hard enough on its own. Cold showers, prayer, training, diet, all of it comes with friction. But there's a second kind of friction nobody talks about. It's not physical. It's psychological. It's the look you get when you say no to the weekend drink. It's the "bro just take it easy" when you skip the slop and hit the gym instead.Most men don't fail because they lack conviction intellectually. They fail because the first bit of social pressure cracks them. One skipped workout becomes three. One missed prayer becomes a habit of missing. You start crying wolf to yourself, and eventually you stop believing your own promises.Aristotle said virtue requires habituation in a community that recognizes and rewards it. We are not living in that kind of society anymore. So the higher you climb, the more alone you'll feel doing it. That's not a reason to stop.In this video I cover:-the difference between physical friction and psychological friction-why the boy who cried wolf is the perfect analogy for broken discipline-Aristotle's view on virtue, habituation, and community-why weekends and modern rest culture are a societal baseline worth questioning-how to tell the difference between well-intentioned correction and noise-why fortitude is the virtue that gets you throughThe Legion: Stop doing this alone, join a brotherhood of Christian men who will hold you to the standard you already know you should be living. → https://fftkingdom.com/the-legionFFTK: Come train, pray, and build with men in person. → https://fftkingdom.com/1:1 Coaching: If you're tired of knowing exactly what you need to do and still not doing it, apply to work with me directly. → https://forgevirtue.com/Find out more: links to all my social media profiles and content can be found here. → https://linktr.ee/tomas.mones0:00 Personal Update and Injury Recovery1:02 Social Environment as Obstacle to Virtue2:30 Peer Pressure Cuts Your Intention4:33 Crying Wolf to Yourself5:35 Saying No to the Status Quo7:14 Friction Should Not Be Minimized8:08 Climbing Higher Increases Friction9:37 Discerning Valid Criticism12:18 Aristotle on Habituation13:42 Virtue of Fortitude

26. juni 202615 min
episode Why God Will Judge You for Playing It Safe [Circles of Influence] cover

Why God Will Judge You for Playing It Safe [Circles of Influence]

MY RUMBLE CHANNEL: https://rumble.com/c/tomasmonesMY NEW INSTAGRAM (I was banned): https://www.instagram.com/tomas.mones1/Most men spend their whole lives inside a single circle. They get themselves sorted, maybe build a decent life, keep a prayer routine, hold a job. And they think that's the finish line. It isn't. It's barely the starting point.This video is about the Circles of Influence theory, a framework my dad introduced me to that underpins almost everything I talk about on this channel. The idea is simple: your capacity to impact the world around you is a direct extension of your self-possession and virtue. You cannot give what you don't have. You cannot lead where you haven't been.I walk through what it actually looks like to move from self-mastery to family leadership to wider societal impact, and why most men never make it past the first ring. Not because they don't want to, but because they haven't built the bandwidth. They've stopped investing in themselves and convinced themselves it's enough.The parable of the talents is real. The servant who buried his was cast out. That's not a metaphor to take lightly.In this video I cover:-the Circles of Influence theory and what it means for masculine leadership-why self-possession is the baseline, not the goal-how bandwidth and capacity determine your sphere of impact-why jumping straight to the front line without the foundation causes the wheels to fall off-the moral imperative of expanding your circle and what happens to the world when men don'tThe Legion: Stop doing this alone, join a brotherhood of Christian men who will hold you to the standard you already know you should be living. → https://fitforthekingdom.com.au/the-legion FFTK: Come train, pray, and build with men in person. → http://fitforthekingdom.com.au/ 1:1 Coaching: If you're tired of knowing exactly what you need to do and still not doing it, apply to work with me directly. → https://fitforthekingdom.com.au/forgedFind out more: links to all my social media profiles and content can be found here. → https://linktr.ee/tomas.mones 0:00 Intro and Announcements0:54 The Two Circles Explained2:05 Inner Circle Self Possession3:27 Bandwidth and Capacity3:52 Expanding Your Circle of Influence5:58 Family as the First Circle6:27 Parable of the Talents7:44 Leading Your Family Requires Virtue10:17 Building the Kingdom Beyond Family11:54 Why Men Must Impact Society13:24 Saints Who Gave Everything14:19 Your Inaction Is a Sin of Omission15:36 Danger of Skipping Steps16:27 Start Building Your Foundation Now17:26 Outro and the Legion

15. juni 202618 min
episode My Daily Prayer Routine (24 yr old Catholic father) cover

My Daily Prayer Routine (24 yr old Catholic father)

MY RUMBLE CHANNEL: https://rumble.com/c/tomasmonesMY TELEGRAM: https://t.me/tomas_monesAll other socials: https://linktr.ee/tomas.monesMost men treat prayer like a tool they pick up when things get hard. They want a routine, a formula, something that works. But a prayer life that actually forms you looks different from that. This video walks through what I personally do, why I do it, and what I think every man needs to understand before he builds anything else on top.The sacraments come first. Not as a religious formality, but because that is where grace actually flows. The Eucharist and Confession are not optional add-ons to a spiritual life. They are the structure everything else hangs on. If your prayer life is built around anything other than those two, it is going to keep falling short.From there, the daily practice. Silent prayer, scripture, spiritual reading, the Rosary. I break down what each of these looks like, why I do them in the order I do, and what I have found them to produce over time. The Rosary in particular gets its own treatment because it deserves it. There is nothing like it. Vocal, contemplative, structured, and devastating to sin.In this video I cover:-why the sacraments are the foundation of any real prayer life-what my morning prayer routine actually looks like-why scripture reading gets more fruitful the longer you stay in the faith-the Rosary as a school of virtue-what to do when prayer feels dry and you are just getting the reps inReading List: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1q-mjqFkXIWur1xUBB_6FCavcdSzOX18t2902JK9vxAY/edit?usp=sharingThe Legion: Stop doing this alone, join a brotherhood of Christian men who will hold you to the standard you already know you should be living. → https://fitforthekingdom.com.au/the-legion FFTK: Come train, pray, and build with men in person. → http://fitforthekingdom.com.au/ 1:1 Coaching: If you're tired of knowing exactly what you need to do and still not doing it, apply to work with me directly. → https://fitforthekingdom.com.au/forgedFind out more: links to all my social media profiles and content can be found here. → https://linktr.ee/tomas.mones 0:00 Instagram Ban and Rumble Backup1:38 Sacraments as Ordinary Means of Grace2:32 The Eucharist Source and Summit3:39 Why Confession Changes You4:22 Tomas's Personal Prayer Routine5:33 Scripture Reading Daily Practice6:37 Morning Prayer Stack Overview6:53 The Holy Rosary Best Prayer8:13 Rosary Weapon Against Temptation8:24 School of Virtue in the Mysteries9:26 Closing Thoughts on Daily Prayer

10. juni 202611 min
episode The 3 Practices That Train Your Will to Choose God cover

The 3 Practices That Train Your Will to Choose God

Most men are losing the interior battle before the day even begins. Not because they lack discipline. Not because they don't care. But because everything around them has been engineered to gratify the will, and they have never learned to mortify it.This video is about true denial of self. Not the surface-level version. The real thing. The kind Christ demands when he says take up your cross and follow me.The modern world has removed almost every form of natural friction from daily life. Hot showers on demand. Hyper-palatable food. Endless entertainment. Pornography. You only need to be struggling with one of these things for your interior gaze to be pulled away from God. Most men are dealing with several at once.There's a reason the religious life requires three vows. Chastity. Poverty. Obedience. Each one strips away a layer of attachment. Each one asks more of you than the last. A man can be living chastely, detached from material comfort, and still be constantly gratifying his will in the small things. The scrolling. The entertainment. The avoidance of prayer. That's where most men actually are, and they don't even know it.The hardest vow is obedience because it requires you to surrender the will itself. And that's the crux of the whole thing.If you're chasing holiness but still running from friction, this is the video you need to watch.In this video I cover:-why modern comfort is the primary obstacle to the spiritual life-the three vows and what they reveal about self-denial-why mortifying the will is the crux of true holiness-cold showers, the rosary, and fasting as tools for forming the will-how to consecrate everyday friction as an offering to ChristThe Legion: Stop doing this alone, join a brotherhood of Christian men who will hold you to the standard you already know you should be living. → https://fitforthekingdom.com.au/the-legion FFTK: Come train, pray, and build with men in person. → http://fitforthekingdom.com.au/ 1:1 Coaching: If you're tired of knowing exactly what you need to do and still not doing it, apply to work with me directly. → https://fitforthekingdom.com.au/forgedFind out more: links to all my social media profiles and content can be found here. → https://linktr.ee/tomas.mones0:00 True Denial of Self0:47 Self Denial Is Not Optional2:07 Modern Comfort Kills Spiritual Growth3:27 You Must Sit in the Friction5:15 Why You Struggle to Pray6:10 What We Learn from Religious Vows7:37 The Vow of Poverty Explained8:17 The Vow of Obedience9:57 Mortifying the Will in Modern Life11:00 Three Tools for Self Denial11:44 Cold Showers Train the Will14:04 The Rosary as Mortification16:42 Fasting as Extended Self Denial17:37 Consecrating Your Disciplines to Christ19:10 Examine Where You Flee the Friction19:35 Practical Challenge Cold Showers21:03 Legion and Coaching Offer

5. juni 202621 min