76. When Parenthood Rewrites the Dream with Alex Kuhn

76. When Parenthood Rewrites the Dream with Alex Kuhn

What if the thing standing between you and the life you actually want isn't your circumstances — it's still thinking in terms of “or” instead of “and”? Alex Kuhn, founder of Born Leaders (now rebranding to All In Worldwide), joins me for a conversation about ambition, identity, and what it really means to go all in — on your career and your family, your dreams and your present moment. Alex was the guy who left home at 12 to chase Olympic swimming dreams, became one of the fastest-rising college swim coaches in the country, then lost it all — the job, the relationship, and his sense of self — in the span of a few months. What came out of that rock bottom was a total identity resurrection that has shaped everything he does today. Whether you're a dad navigating how to be fully present at home while still building something meaningful, a parent wondering if going after your dreams is selfish, or someone stuck in binary thinking about what you can and can't have — this one is for you. And yes, this episode is releasing Father's Day week, but the message is for everyone. Highlights * Why Alex chose a $20,000/year swim coaching job in Iowa over a Nike management training offer — and what that decision taught him * The "or to and" shift: how identifying yourself by your title keeps you stuck in binary thinking * Getting fired, losing the relationship, and eating bananas and popsicles on his sister's couch — Alex's rock bottom story * Why the first step out of rock bottom isn't belief — it's action * What self-trust actually means (hint: it's not about having all the answers) * The "selfish vision" framework Alex uses with his whole family — including his 7- and 4-year-olds * Why parenthood doesn't have to be all sacrifice, and the powerful modeling that happens when kids watch you chase your own dreams * Redefining "juggling it all" — and giving yourself permission to drop a ball * Boundaries as subtraction, not addition: stop adding to your life and start dumping what doesn't serve you * Shutting the business down four weeks a year — and why it works * The story Alex's dad told him at a swim meet that became his life's mantra: fight for yourself Chapters 1:03 — Meet Alex Kuhn 2:51 — Fatherhood and second acts 3:52 — Early ambition and swimming 5:58 — Chasing legacy and empire 8:29 — From "or" to "and" 11:04 — Getting fired and the identity collapse 13:37 — Climbing out of rock bottom 16:22 — Self-trust and the messy middle 19:04 — Redefining ambition today 20:29 — The family vision weekly ritual 21:18 — Family vision sync 22:17 — Team family mindset 23:50 — Kids follow actions, not words 25:51 — The selfish parenting reframe 28:21 — Juggling without perfection 30:09 — Boundaries and seasons 33:35 — Seasonal business shutdowns 35:35 — Fight for yourself 37:57 — Where to find Alex Resources * Alex Kuhn's websites: :https://bornleaders.com/ [https://bornleaders.com/] and  allinwithalex.com [http://allinwithalex.com/] Want to learn more? The Thread [https://www.thethreadwlc.com/] Be sure to follow me @audradinell on Instagram and LinkedIn This show is part of the ICT Podcast Network [https://www.ictpod.net]. Disclaimer: we may receive a small commission on any products purchased through the links used in this episode. I only recommend tools and resources I actually use and find valuable.

75. Your Next Chapter Doesn’t Require a New Life with Monica Packer, Habits & Identity Coach

What if your second act isn't about changing your life — it's about finally showing up in the one you already have? Monica Packer, founder of the About Progress podcast and a certified habits and identity coach, joins me to talk about the version of personal growth nobody talks about: the quiet, internal kind. Monica spent years as a self-described aspiring perfectionist — achieving on the outside while disappearing from herself on the inside. What she discovered in her 30s (after two early midlife crises and a decade of recovery) is that sustainable growth doesn't come from hustle or apathy — it comes from progress. And it starts by asking: do I even know who I am? We talk about why perfectionism isn't just about striving — it's just as alive in the people who've stopped trying. We explore Monica's "Do Something List," the three Cs of change (curiosity, compassion, and courage), why habits built for men don't work for women, and what it means to stop waiting for arrival and start trusting the process. Highlights * Monica's "costume life" realization at 30 — loving the life she'd built but not recognizing herself in it * Why perfectionism lives on both sides of the spectrum: the overachiever AND the person who's given up trying * The connection between ADHD, all-or-nothing thinking, and the perfectionism spectrum * What the "Do Something List" is — and why never completing it is the whole point * Why there is no arrival, and the mantra that will help you stop waiting for one * The Three Cs of Change: curiosity, compassion, and courage * Why popular habit methods fail women — invisible labor, less time, less energy, less predictability * The inner comparison monster: comparing your current self to a past version of yourself * Identity isn't static — and that's actually freeing Chapters 1:03 — Introduction & episode premise 1:28 — Meet Monica Packer 2:55 — The "costume life" realization: living life on the sidelines 8:35 — Perfectionism as a spectrum — it's not just overachieving 12:40 — Starting the experiment: the internal and external work 14:06 — The Do Something List 18:46 — There is no arrival: the transformation lies in the process 22:30 — The Three Cs of Change: curiosity, compassion, and courage 26:34 — Sticky Habits: the book written for women, not men 31:08 — Comparison and the inner critic 33:52 — Where to connect with Monica 35:02 — Identity keeps evolving — and that's a good thing Resources * Sticky Habits: A Woman's Guide to Reclaim Happiness, Ditch Perfectionism, and Create Habits That Last by Monica Packer — pre-order at stickyhabitsbook.com [http://stickyhabitsbook.com/] * Do Something List free training: aboutprogress.com/dsl [http://aboutprogress.com/dsl] * About Progress podcast on Apple [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/about-progress/id1173416233] or Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/0YRTp9ccKHuHZdQy5qUEm6] Want to learn more? The Thread [https://www.thethreadwlc.com/] Be sure to follow me @audradinell on Instagram and LinkedIn This show is part of the ICT Podcast Network [https://www.ictpod.net]. Disclaimer: we may receive a small commission on any products purchased through the links used in this episode. I only recommend tools and resources I actually use and find valuable.

74. Starting Over on a New Continent with Carolina Freeman

What does it actually take to leave behind everything you've built — your career, your country, your circle — and start over from scratch? Carolina Freeman did exactly that when she moved from Argentina to Wichita, and what she found on the other side is a story about identity, resilience, and the courage to finally live life on your own terms. Carolina is the chef and owner of Argentina's Empanadas in Wichita, Kansas — and she is one of those rare people whose wisdom hits you soul deep. In this conversation, we talk about the grief of starting over, the surprising difficulty of making friends as an adult, and why the journey itself is the actual reward. HIGHLIGHTS * Why moving around as a child builds the kind of resilience that sticks with you into adulthood — and how to give kids that same gift without leaving the country * The emotional reality of immigrating as an adult: leaving behind a career, a neighborhood, a university identity, and friendships — and arriving somewhere no one knows your story * Why making friends past 35 is genuinely hard (and why it has nothing to do with you) * The two types of people you'll find after 40: those who are completely settled, and those who are just starting to discover who they really are * How Carolina left a career in HR to build a business that bridges her past and her present * Why the second act isn't about age — it's about waking up and taking agency over the life you actually want * The difference between chasing an end result and learning to find reward in the daily process * The emotional nakedness of entrepreneurship — and why feeling your emotions is not weakness, it's data * The concept of "emotional agility" from Harvard psychologist Susan David and how using emotions as information can guide better decisions * Why success, for Carolina, means freedom, harmony, and peace — not a yacht * How small, consistent action — a "grain of salt" every day — is what builds something big over time CHAPTERS * 0:00 — Welcome * 1:50 — Second Acts and Identity * 3:25 — Moving to Wichita * 4:35 — Culture Shock and Language * 5:35 — Resilience Through Change * 7:22 — Making Friends as Adults * 9:46 — Defining the Second Act * 10:57 — From HR to Empanadas * 13:02 — Authenticity and Acceptance * 14:15 — Loneliness and Starting Over * 16:22 — Community-Driven Business * 17:39 — Taking the Leap * 19:07 — Journey Over Outcome * 20:34 — Live How You Want * 22:26 — Show Up Daily * 24:05 — Support and Emotions * 27:32 — Emotional Agility Tools * 29:42 — Redefining Success * 31:17 — Freedom and Brand Legacy * 33:09 — What's Next and Where to Follow RESOURCES MENTIONED *  Argentina's Empanadas — Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/argentinas_empanadas_/] | Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/EatEmpanadas/] | Location: Clifton Square, College Hill, Wichita, KS | Food truck at the Saturday Farmer's Market Want to learn more? The Thread [https://www.thethreadwlc.com/] Be sure to follow me @audradinell on Instagram and LinkedIn This show is part of the ICT Podcast Network [https://www.ictpod.net]. Disclaimer: we may receive a small commission on any products purchased through the links used in this episode. I only recommend tools and resources I actually use and find valuable.

73. The Art of Celebration with Jen Christian

What if your birthday celebration wasn't really about your birthday at all? Jen Christian turned 40 with one of the most intentional, fun, and friendship-forward celebrations I've ever seen — and it started not with a party plan, but with a personal reckoning. After navigating a postpartum fog that hit during COVID, Jen found herself asking: Who am I now? What do I value? And who are my people for this next decade? The answers led her to create "40 Things for 40" — a curated list of experiences, meals, adventures, and connections she organized into a Google site and sent to the people she loves most. No pressure. No spotlight. Just an open invitation to show up and share life together. If you're approaching a milestone birthday — or honestly any season of life where you're ready to come back to yourself — this conversation is going to spark something in you. HIGHLIGHTS * Jen shares how coming out of postpartum and the COVID season prompted her to ask the big questions: who am I, what do I value, and who are my people? * Why loneliness can sneak up on you even when you're surrounded by wonderful people — and what to do about it * How Jen's eclectic friend group actually inspired the format of her celebration * The four "buckets" she used to organize her 40 things: places to dine, things she loves most, things to discover, and an evolution of Jen * Why she chose a Google Site to host the list (hint: her husband's class reunion inspired it) * How a Google Form made logistics effortless and her social calendar full for the next decade * Why celebration isn't about the spotlight — it's about pausing, reflecting, and connecting * Jen's definition of celebration: "It's about pausing. It's about reflection. It's about accomplishment, and it's about connection and relationship." CHAPTERS 0:00 – Welcome and Meet Jen 1:04 – Why Turning 40 Matters 3:10 – Reclaiming Identity After Motherhood 6:47 – Pulling Back and Finding Your People 9:57 – The 40 Things for 40 Idea 12:07 – Building the List and Buckets 17:03 – Sharing It Out and Timeline 20:11 – Favorite Picks From the 40 21:37 – Why Celebration Matters 23:05 – Template Offer and Wrap Up RESOURCES * Jen's "40 Things for 40 [https://drive.google.com/file/d/1WuKwQIlI7U5wwdF8BxKBe_o8_lWiq_MX/view?usp=sharing]" Template * Saltwell Farm Kitchen — between Topeka and Lawrence, Kansas (https://www.saltwellfarmkitchen.com [https://www.saltwellfarmkitchen.com/]) * Google Sites — the free platform Jen used to build and share her celebration list (https://sites.google.com [https://sites.google.com/]) * Google Forms — used for RSVPs and tracking signups (https://forms.google.com [https://forms.google.com/]) * ChatGPT — Jen used this to help brainstorm ideas for her final bucket of five (https://chat.openai.com [https://chat.openai.com/]) * Pinterest — also used for inspiration while building the list (https://www.pinterest.com [https://www.pinterest.com/]) Want to learn more? The Thread [https://www.thethreadwlc.com/] Be sure to follow me @audradinell on Instagram and LinkedIn This show is part of the ICT Podcast Network [https://www.ictpod.net]. Disclaimer: we may receive a small commission on any products purchased through the links used in this episode. I only recommend tools and resources I actually use and find valuable.

72. The Importance of Detours with Career and Development Coach, Jenna Bottolfsen

What if the path that didn't work out was actually the one preparing you for exactly where you're supposed to be? Career and leadership coach Jenna Bottolfsen joins me for a conversation about the unexpected pivots, restarts, and pauses that shape us — and why the thing you thought was a setback might actually be the most important step in your story. Jenna went from 25 years in corporate HR to a failed first attempt at entrepreneurship right as COVID hit, back to corporate, and then into the unexpected opportunity of purchasing an established business. She now runs Wallace Associates, helping people navigate career transitions, clarify their value, and take confident next steps. This conversation is full of practical tools and permission-giving perspective for anyone sitting with uncertainty about what comes next. Highlights * Why "detours are signs too" — and how Cleo Wade's poem frames the entire conversation * The difference between a failure and a learning opportunity, and why Jenna refuses to use the word failure * How letting go of a corporate title is often the hardest — and most necessary — first step * The role values and purpose play when someone feels stuck or out of alignment in their career * Why Jenna starts every client conversation with, "What got you into this field in the first place?" * The power of "five seconds of insane courage" — and how you don't have to be brave for long, just long enough * Two practical tools: the "You Are Here" exercise and the Worst Case Scenario spiral * Why "expectations are the killer of joy" — and how loosening them opens the door to forward movement * The mindset shift from "this has to be forever" to "what's my next right step?" * How a friend's grief over a missed promotion led to the realization that the job she didn't get was actually protecting what mattered most to her Chapters 0:00 — Introduction & About Jenna 2:02 — Detours Are Signs (Cleo Wade poem) 2:44 — Milestone Catch-Up 3:44 — Jenna's COVID Leap & Return to Corporate 4:52 — Buying Wallace Associates 6:07 — Resilience After Setbacks 8:10 — Five Seconds of Courage 10:26 — Audra's First Business Lesson 12:35 — Detours & Alignment 15:39 — Questions for When You're Feeling Stuck 20:09 — Letting Go of Identity 24:55 — The "You Are Here" & Worst Case Scenario Tools 28:19 — The Next Right Step Mindset 31:33 — Closing: Loosen Your Expectations Resources Mentioned * In a World of Sunrises by Cleo Wade [https://cleowade.com/] — the book Audra references and from which she reads the "Detours are signs too" poem * Wallace Associates [https://www.wallaceassociates.com/] — Jenna Bottolfsen's career and leadership coaching business * The Next Right Thing podcast  [https://emilypfreeman.com/podcast/] Want to learn more? The Thread [https://www.thethreadwlc.com/] Be sure to follow me @audradinell on Instagram and LinkedIn This show is part of the ICT Podcast Network [https://www.ictpod.net]. Disclaimer: we may receive a small commission on any products purchased through the links used in this episode. I only recommend tools and resources I actually use and find valuable.