Jay's Story

Polyamory & Monogamy

Well, hey! It's been a while since we've holla'd at ya. How you holdin up? We've been on a little hiatus - or not so little, to be honest - focusing on life stuff, family milestones, and sometimes just barely keepin it together. Let the church say amen   In this episode which has been in the can since prior to our hiatus, our bi blank men take on the vast and rangy topic of polyamory & monogamy.   Along the way we get into the origin, meaning and nuance of the term polyamory in culture, as well as other terms like nonmonogamy and open relationships; we grapple with and debate our own conceptions of monogamy, as two folks that have long decided it's not for either of us; we explore class dynamics within the polyamorous community writ large, stimulated by relatively recent conversation around polyamory in mainstream media and social media; we even discuss the tricky phenomenon of polyamory (or nonmonogamy) as a fix for failed monogamous partnership;   And much more!  We hope you enjoy it, and we wanna hear your thoughts.     A few links to stuff & folks referenced in our convo:   Neo-pagan leader Morning Glory Zell Ravenheart - credited with originating the term 'polyamory' [https://www.huffpost.com/entry/morning-glory-zell-dead_n_5324410] Tyler Austin Harper's article in The Atlantic which sparked our class convo [https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2024/02/polyamory-ruling-class-fad-monogamy/677312/] The Ethical Slut, by Dossie Easton [https://bookshop.org/p/books/the-ethical-slut-third-edition-a-practical-guide-to-polyamory-open-relationships-and-other-freedoms-in-sex-and-love-revised-janet-w-hardy/11368130?ean=9780399579660&next=t&next=t] Polyamory advocate and educator Evita Sawyer [https://www.instagram.com/lavitaloca34/] Polysecure, by Jessica Fern [https://bookshop.org/p/books/polysecure-attachment-trauma-and-consensual-nonmonogamy-jessica-fern/14490932?ean=9781944934989&next=t&next=t] Love's Not Color Blind [https://bookshop.org/p/books/love-s-not-color-blind-race-and-representation-in-polyamorous-and-other-alternative-communities-kevin-a-patterson/50751?ean=9781944934460&next=t&next=t], by Kevin Patterson [https://www.instagram.com/polyrolemodels] Bisexual Married Men [https://bookshop.org/p/books/bisexual-married-men-stories-of-relationships-acceptance-and-authenticity-robert-cohen/20113162?ean=9781032473260&next=t&next=t], by Rob Cohen [https://www.instagram.com/twobiguys/]

Are Bi+ People More Susceptible to Touch Deprivation (aka Skin Hunger)?

In this episode, BlackFluidity hosts, Frank and Mo, address the sensitive topic of "Touch Deprivation," aka ‘Skin Starvation’. They discuss its definition, personal experiences, societal impacts, and the distinction between sexual and non-sexual touch. They also cover the significance of touch from childhood to adulthood, cultural variations in touch, the role of technology in fostering isolation, and strategies to combat touch deprivation, such as engaging in social activities, understanding consent, and utilizing technology for connection. The conversation is insightful, with the speakers sharing personal anecdotes, posing reflective questions, and offering potential solutions to touch deprivation. The script reflects a deep dive into an often overlooked aspect of human interaction and its importance for mental and emotional well-being.

Terrel's Story

A powerful and deeply personal narrative shared by Terrell, a 23-year-old bisexual Black man who is also disabled. Born and raised in Decatur, Illinois, Terrell opens up about his journey of self-discovery, acceptance, and the challenges he faces at the intersection of his identities. From an early age, Terrell felt different from others, grappling with societal stereotypes and expectations tied to his race, sexuality, and disability. He speaks candidly about the internal conflict and self-hatred he initially felt upon realizing he was different, compounded by the difficulties of being Black and disabled in society.   Despite these challenges, Terrell's story is one of growth, self-love, and resilience. He recounts his adolescence, his first crushes on both a female and a male at the age of 16, and the process of coming out in a Christian household that had instilled fear of damnation for his sexuality. Terrell found solace and acceptance among friends who were also part of the LGBTQ+ community and through his involvement in a high school GSA (Gay-Straight Alliance), which provided a supportive environment to explore and affirm his identity.   Terrell's narrative also touches on the complexities of navigating sexual relationships, confronting biphobia, and the importance of connection over casual encounters. He emphasizes the significance of understanding and respecting LGBTQ+ history, advocating for self-education as a means to empower oneself and others.   He also reflects on the importance of embracing both his masculine and feminine sides, advocating for self-acceptance and the freedom to express oneself without fear of judgment. Terrell's journey is a testament to the power of self-acceptance, the value of supportive communities, and the strength found in embracing one's full identity. His story highlights the challenges and triumphs of living at the intersection of multiple marginalized identities, offering insights and encouragement to others navigating similar paths.

#FireRound - Another Q&A mashup with CeeMo and Frank

We ask one another insightful and fun questions so you can get to know us, and perhaps to stimulate convo where you're at. This one is not such a quick-hitter, we go in on a few subjects! #BlackFluidity #biblackmentalk

Jay's Story

A personal narrative of self-discovery and evolution. Jay's story, the journey of a 38 year old bisexual Black man, delves into his personal journey of self-discovery and growth, his identities, exploring his experiences with bisexuality, relationships with both men and women, challenges in communication and acceptance, as well as reflections on community involvement and personal development.