Episode 6: Urgency Is a Feeling, Not a Fact

Episode 6: Urgency Is a Feeling, Not a Fact

Okay, Actually is a podcast for people who are working hard and starting to wonder if the problem is them. It's not. In under 30 minutes, we dig into what's truly broken and figure out how to build a solution that can actually work. In this episode, I get into urgency: what it actually does to your brain, why fake urgency is so hard to call out, and why fire drill culture costs you more than just your Tuesday afternoons. If you've ever hung up on a work call for an issue at home (or vice versa), this episode's for you. 00:00 A Daughter's Emergency 01:47 What Urgency Does 04:24 Bin Gate 05:32 Real vs Fake Urgency 07:56 Too Many Channels 10:09 Fire Drill Culture 13:44 Holidays Reveal Truth 15:11 Three Filtering Questions 17:10 Recalibrate Your Alarm Three questions to ask before you respond to something "urgent:" 1. Whose urgency is this? Did I generate it, or did someone hand it to me? Is this actually mine to own? 2. What actually happens if I wait? Real urgency has a real answer. Manufactured urgency evaporates, resolves without you, or turns out to be someone else's anxiety. 3. Is this urgent, or is it just loud? Volume is not severity. The number of channels someone uses to reach you is not a measure of importance. Referenced in this episode: The High Cost of Fake Urgency in the Workplace [https://qz.com/fake-urgency-at-work-leadership-burnout] — Quartz, April 2026 Find me here: OkayDoak.com [https://okaydoak.com/] karen@okaydoak.com [karen@okaydoak.com]

Episode 5: The Wrong Problem Hire (with Rachael Goldfarb)

Okay, Actually is a podcast for people who are working hard and starting to wonder if the problem is them. It's not. Each episode, we dig into what's truly broken and figure out how to build a solution that can actually work. In this episode, I'm joined by Rachael Goldfarb — adviser and former Chief of Staff — to talk about one of the most common ways organizations avoid solving a structural problem: they hire toward it. The Chief of Staff role gets used this way more than almost any other: not because the role isn't valuable, but because it's become the default answer to a question nobody asked out loud. 00:00 Officer of the Day 02:51 The Job Description Problem 10:19 Why This Role Specifically 15:15 The Workaround Problem 16:44 What to Ask Before You Hire 20:56 The AI Chief of Staff About Rachael: Rachael Goldfarb is the co-founder of The Coul & Gold Group, an advisory services firm focused on leadership architecture for the C-Suite. They support senior executives, chiefs of staff, and teams to be as successful as possible through assessments, frameworks, operating systems, and deliberate design. Find great resources and learn about how to work with The Coul & Gold Group at https://coulandgold.com/ [https://coulandgold.com/] Subscribe to their newsletter at: https://briefing.coulandgold.com/ [https://briefing.coulandgold.com/] Find me here: OkayDoak.com [https://okaydoak.com/] karen@okaydoak.com [karen@okaydoak.com] Get clear. Get sorted. Get going. Stay sane.

Episode 4: Just Counting

Okay, Actually is a podcast for people who are working hard, still falling behind, and are starting to wonder if the problem is them. It's not. Each episode — always under 25 minutes — we dig into what's truly broken and figure out how to build a solution that can actually work. In this episode: vanity metrics aren't just a marketing problem — they're everywhere, and they're undermining your ability to diagnose anything accurately. We've spent the last few episodes on wrong diagnoses, ground truth, and friction. This one is about the data that feeds all of it. My husband Jeff says reporting without targets is just counting. After this episode, you'll know exactly what he means. 00:00 Hallmark Movie Obsession 03:18 Episode Setup Measurement 05:56 Failure Mode 1: Counting Without Targets 08:27 Failure Mode 2: The Vanity Number Trap 10:01 Failure Mode 3: Data Collected, Action Not Taken 14:55 Three Questions Filter 18:30 Fix Your Reports The three-question filter — apply it before you send the next report: 1. Do you have a target? Not just a number — a number with a should be attached. 2. Do you have a benchmark? What does good look like relative to something whether it's last period, best in class, or your own stated goal? 3. Are you tracking a delta? Is anything changing, and do you know why (and do you know what you're going to do about it?) If the answer is no to all three, you have a vanity metric. You're counting. Find me here: OkayDoak.com [https://okaydoak.com/] karen@okaydoak.com [karen@okaydoak.com] Get clear. Get sorted. Get going. Stay sane.

Episode 3: Name That Friction!

Okay, Actually is a podcast for people who are working hard, still falling behind, and are starting to wonder if the problem is them. It's not. Each episode — always under 25 minutes — we dig into what's truly broken and figure out how to build a solution that can actually work. In this episode, I walk through what friction actually is, why you've probably stopped feeling it, and how to locate exactly where it lives — because a people problem solved with a process solution doesn't get fixed. Location matters. 00:00 Never Check Your Bags 04:11 When Friction Gets Normal 06:18 Acceptance vs Surrender 09:45 Five Ps Framework 18:21 Friction vs Ground Truth 21:42 Wrap Up and Connect The Five Ps 1. People: is the friction coming from a person, a dynamic, or someone in the wrong role? 2. Process: is the friction built into how things are or have always been done? 3. Product: is the friction in the tool or system everyone's working around instead of through? 4. Place: is the friction in the environment itself? 5. Priorities: is the friction coming from direction that's unclear, contested, or unresolved? Find me here: OkayDoak.com [https://okaydoak.com/] karen@okaydoak.com [karen@okaydoak.com] Get clear. Get sorted. Get going. Stay sane.

Episode 2: How Do You Know That's Actually the Problem?

Okay, Actually is a podcast for people who are working hard, still falling behind, and are starting to wonder if the problem is them. It's not. Each episode — always under 25 minutes — we dig into what's truly broken and figure out how to build a solution that can actually work. In this episode, I walk through what ground truth is, why it's harder to find than it sounds, and four questions I use to test whether I've actually gotten there — or whether I'm just comfortable with where I've landed. 02:06 The Real Question 03:04 Defining Ground Truth 07:02 Four Ground Truth Tests 15:57 When Truth Feels Deflating 17:55 Apply It This Week The four questions: 1. Does it change shape? Does your explanation about the problem change depending on who's asking? 2. Can you break it? Can you find the scenario where you're wrong? 3. Is this the source or the signal? If you solved this exact thing, would the underlying situation actually change? 4. Does it hold alone? Does this still feel true when no one's watching and nothing needs to sound good? Find me here: OkayDoak.com [https://okaydoak.com/] karen@okaydoak.com [karen@okaydoak.com] Get clear. Get sorted. Get going. Stay sane.