12. Where Shame Dies: Disability, Desire & the Radical Power of Being Fully Seen (feat. Trista Marie)

12. Where Shame Dies: Disability, Desire & the Radical Power of Being Fully Seen (feat. Trista Marie)

12.Where Shame Dies: Disability, Desire & the Radical Power of Being Fully Seen (feat. Trista Marie) In this deeply moving episode of Pleasure Bound, Kelsey & Kate sit with author, model, and disability advocate Trista Marie to explore what it means to embody pleasure, sexuality, and self-acceptance in a body the world often refuses to see as desirable. Trista opens up about the origins of her book "Where Shame Dies," living with scoliosis and chronic respiratory failure, and the years of desensitization it took to stop internalizing ableism as her own problem. The conversation moves through modeling and vulnerability, the healing power of queer and non-monogamous friendships ("kissing the homies"), navigating intimacy and rejection in dating, and the radical joy of claiming her own bossiness and pleasure on her own terms. It's a raw, funny, and profound conversation about resistance, desire, and what a more accessible, loving future could look like.   Timestamps (0:00) — “Let’s talk about sex” clip  (1:30) — Intro (3:35) — Introducing Trista, disability & sexuality advocacy work (6:30) — Naming her disabilities (8:14) — Current creative projects & the weight of Pioneering (13:20) — The meaning behind "Where Shame Dies" (15:24) — Where the accumulation of shame came from (16:30) — Unlearning internalized ableism (24:21) — Modeling, boudoir & seeing herself as beautiful (27:50) — Desensitization as armor & self-preservation (29:55) — Filtration systems & who you let in (33:24) — Pleasure & Friendship – fluid relationship opportunities (38:00) — Queerness- an invitation for more love (40:55) — "I don't want to tell you" — physical intimacy & being truly seen (44:33) — The "dark magic" of being seen but not seen (50:03) — Fantasizing about the future of pleasure (54:52) — Are humans evolving toward greater acceptance? (59:39) — What Kelsey & Kate have learned from doing this work (1:02:00) — Redefining pleasure with no limits or normalization (1:04:37) — Talking about sex and owning bossiness in the bedroom (1:06:20) — Closing thoughts & goodbyes   Resources:  https://www.tristamarie.com/ [https://www.tristamarie.com/disability-x-sexuality] Where Shame Dies - https://www.tristamarie.com/disability-x-sexuality [https://www.tristamarie.com/disability-x-sexuality]

11. The Scenic Route: Pleasure & the Erotic as a way of Life

In Episode 11 Kelsey and Kate talk about what happens when you stop ignoring the agitation — and actually listen. From stalled pleasure practices and overcommitted calendars to the unexpected joy of missing out (JOMO), this episode is a raw, honest, and heart-felt conversation about integration, presence, and redefining what pleasure actually looks like in daily life. They dig into the pressure to perform, the exhaustion of chasing outcomes (in the bedroom and beyond), and how detaching from the destination opens up a whole new sensual landscape. Plus: friendship love languages, the power of tending your ecosystem, and why sometimes you just need to give someone a dildo and tell them they're pretty. Kelsey shares her deep dive into a more integrated, moment-to-moment pleasure practice — and the grief, horniness, and hard-won agency that got her there. Kate opens up about survival mode, solo time she can't seem to carve out, and what it means to close a chapter while standing at the edge of a new one. This episode is about making pleasure a way of being, not a box to check. Resources: Kate's Quad friendly cl!t stimulator - The Satisfyer [https://www.amazon.com/Satisfyer-Vibrator-Clitoris-Stimulator-Vibrators/dp/B071CPR2V4?ref_=ast_sto_dp&th=1] Kelsey's Quad friendly cl!t stimulator - The Womanizer [https://www.womanizer.com/us/womanizer-og?color=208] Dipsea app - https://www.dipseastories.com/ [https://www.dipseastories.com/] Adrianne Marie Brown  [https://adriennemareebrown.net/about/] Gabriel Rodreick - Freaque [https://gabrielrodreick.com/freaque] The Four Agreements – don Miguel Ruiz [https://share.google/Mt3TmJaKyaGFDYhwb]   Timestamps: (0:00) — Intro – What’s Coming Up (2:16) — Integration & Pleasure (4:12) — Kate on being out of Practice & Self-judgment  (5:20) — JOMO Over FOMO: Honoring Your Body (9:09) — Kelsey on Analysis of Agitation, Horniness, and Taking back Agency (13:12)— Self-Pleasure & Gifting Joy in the Shape of a Vibrator (14:25) — Prioritizing Female Pleasure Through the Ages (16:30) — Exploring a new Toys & Brain Plasticity in real time (19:02) — The Scenic Route: Non-Linear Self-Pleasure (21:31) — Detachment from Outcome in Pleasure & Life (24:10) — Eroticism of loving on YOU  (29:28) — Trusting the process, Gratitude, Enough-ness (32:25) — Comparison culture, Speak with Love - your cells are listening (35:23) — Integration, Grief & Living a Sensuous life (38:19) — Resistance to Hustle Culture & Marketing (42:06) — Reframing Currency & Reimagining Society (44:55) — Kate on turning 37, closing chapters, and gifts that don't come with credentials (48:15) — Kelsey on her gift & new offering (49:15) — The Snails Journey – Maintaining a Healthy Ecosystem (54:04) — We Are the Fish (a ChatGPT poem that absolutely slaps) (56:35) — Body Grief, Living Fully, Movement & Surrender (59:55) — Power of Visualization & Holistic Pleasure (1:02:44) — No Regrets – Reflections on our Able-bodied bodies (1:05:40) — Outro: The best is yet to come

10. No Apologies: Intimacy, Disability & Bringing your Whole Self to the Party (ft. Jim LeBrecht)

Episode Description: In this episode, we're joined by the incomparable Jim LeBrecht — filmmaker, disability rights activist, Oscar-nominated co-director of Crip Camp, sound design legend, and all-around beautiful human. What unfolds is a raw, honest, and super fun conversation about pleasure, disability, intimacy, and what it means to show up as your full, unapologetic self. Jim opens up publicly for the first time since his film about the intimate aspects of his life — from navigating sex and connection with spina bifida, to discovering new erogenous zones, redefining what getting off looks like, and learning to receive without apology. Together we talk about the body as a site of curiosity rather than shame, the erotic power of paying attention, and why disability can actually invite a deeper, more intentional kind of intimacy. We also dig into the power of humor, the magic of Camp Jened &  similar connections with our community, and why "not overcoming, but becoming" might be the most radical thing any of us can do. This one is tender, sexy, joyful, and genuinely moving. We are so honored Jim trusted us with his story. TimeStamps: (0:00) — GoFundMe ask (0:28) — Intro & episode framing: loving your evolving body & your own brand of weird (3:44) — Welcome Jim LeBrecht (5:15) — Crip Camp & The power of Representation (7:35) — Sound as pleasure: how Jim's love of sound began (9:01) — Spina bifida, early hospitalization & heightened listening (11:09) — Disability, neurodivergence & being accepted as you are (12:50) — Setting limits & comfort in crip community (15:23) — Not expecting to get this old — real talk on aging disabled bodies (16:09) — Camp Jened, Judy Heumann & developing disability pride (19:36) — Inviting in the weird — how we approach new lovers (the "reveal") (22:09) — "No apologies for your body" — reframing the conversation (25:11) — Rejection & Protection — accepting your truths through dropping your baggage (27:55) — The Sensation game we all love to play (29:04) — Defining the weird with playful curiosity (30:39) — Jim's honest breakdown of pleasure, sensation & what gets him off (32:36) — Leaning into new erogenous zones & exploring new paths to arousal (33:45) — Pleasure from Giving Pleasure (35:49) — Expanding erogenous zones & sensual experiences = orgasmic newness (37:42) — Discovering hands-free orgasms, Dipsea, and erotic audio (38:59) — ASMR, whispering, and sound as an erogenous zone (40:15) — Jim as a paraplegic — what his body does and doesn't feel (42:07) — The evolution of Pleasure, sensation lines, mental arousal & Jim's version of coming (46:29) — Disability as an invitation to intentional, curious intimacy (49:18) — The Disabled Desires We Deserve to experience (53:29) — The mirror on the ceiling (it's not what you think... or is it) (55:40) — You have to truly see yourself before you can be fully seen (56:55) — Camp Jened, crabs, and Jim's first girlfriend (58:49) — "The Body Is Not An Apology" & Sonya Renee Taylor (1:00:09) — Disability pride, self-acceptance & the days you still don't feel it (1:01:20) — Not overcoming — Becoming (1:04:11) — The weight that lifts when you ask for help (1:07:14) — Closing: love, gratitude & Jim coming back for part two   References: Pleasure Bound GoFundMe [https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-kelsey-kate-expand-the-pleasure-bound-podcast/cl/o?utm_campaign=man_sharesheet_dash&utm_content=amp17_control-amp20_t1&utm_medium=customer&utm_source=copy_link&lang=en_US] - Donate Here [https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-kelsey-kate-expand-the-pleasure-bound-podcast/cl/o?utm_campaign=man_sharesheet_dash&utm_content=amp17_control-amp20_t1&utm_medium=customer&utm_source=copy_link&lang=en_US] Crip Camp - A Disability Revolution (2020) - https://cripcamp.com/ [https://cripcamp.com/] Move Me Documentary (2022) - https://www.movemedoc.com/ [https://www.movemedoc.com/] The Body Is Not An Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor https://www.sonyareneetaylor.com/the-body-is-not-an-apology/ [https://www.sonyareneetaylor.com/the-body-is-not-an-apology/] Dipsea app - https://www.dipseastories.com/ [https://www.dipseastories.com/]

9. Rage, Release & Reclaiming your "Nasty"

Episode 9 - Rage, Release, and Reclaiming your “Nasty” Episode Description: Episode 9 is equal parts triumphant, tender, and delightfully raunchy. We kick things off with a raw conversation about processing anger — adult temper tantrums, breathwork, and why letting yourself be pissed off is actually good for you. Kate shares a major PT win, which sparks a deep dive into the delicate dance of hope after disability, and the slippery slope of not letting the ‘desire for more’ eclipse the fullness of life as it is. Then things get spicy. Kate recaps her experience at a kink event: the furniture, the trust, the playmates, the paddle, and the unexpected (and very welcome) orgasm she had in a room full of people. We talk about what it means to claim space, advocate for your desires, and rediscover power through curious surrender. Kelsey shares her experience with the Dipsea app, hands-free exploration, and a "baby orgasm" she wasn't totally expecting. We wrap up with a candid conversation about sacred sexuality, social media vulnerability, building a pleasure practice, and the great debate on what to call the lady bits. Equal parts real talk and ridiculous fun. As always, we're messy, unapologetic, and on the path to pleasure as we learn to expand what it means to LOVE the bodies we live in Timestamps: (0:00) – Intro (0:46) – Frustration to Gratitude - Rage & Release  (1:17) – Adult temper tantrums: Breathwork, Screaming, Shaking (2:25) – Anger is valid — let yourself Feel it but don’t live there (5:24) – Kate's major PT win (7:53) – Emotional moments & Gratitude for this Body  (10:30) – The tricky dance with Hope after acquiring a disability (12:00) – "My life no longer revolves around a cure" — Kelsey on detaching from the outcome (13:27) – Celebrate little wins without letting it consume you (17:25) – Homework check-in: Kate gets kinky (19:00) – Putting on the hat, Navigating the space & diving into desire (23:20) – Choosing the furniture and advocating for her desires (24:55) – The scene unfolds: supportive playmates, Sensual exploration and feeling powerful (28:13) – Dirty details leading to Blast off (33:35) –  Coming back down to Earth & Confidence Reset after One bad blow-job (35:00) – Claiming Sensual agency and the Reclamation of Queen energy (38:00) – Sacred f*cks, social media vulnerability, and choosing who gets access to your body AND your Story (40:35) – The containers we create for sharing our Sacred, Sexy, Selves (43:20) – Building the pleasure Rolodex and showing up for yourself (44:40) – Kelsey's homework: the Dipsea app and erotic audio stories (45:33) – Access to Fantasy, imagination, and what we're missing out on (47:50) – Kelsey has a baby - Hands-free orgasm achieved (49:35) – Yucks and yums in dirty talk — "that's my girl" = a hard no (51:20) – The great vagina vocabulary debate: kitty, yoni, beaver, or... basement? (55:15) – Wrapping up: what Kate & Kelsey are working on for the week (59:12) – Outro   Resources: Dipsea app - https://www.dipseastories.com/ [https://www.dipseastories.com/] Dipsea app - TED talk https://www.ted.com/talks/gina_gutierrez_the_relationship_between_sex_and_imagination [https://www.ted.com/talks/gina_gutierrez_the_relationship_between_sex_and_imagination] Mystery cults Substack - https://amandayatesgarcia.substack.com/ [https://amandayatesgarcia.substack.com/] Pleasure Bound Substack - https://carecollective.substack.com/?utm_source=global-search [https://carecollective.substack.com/?utm_source=global-search]

8. Pleasure, Pain & Overcoming Overwhelm

Pleasure, Pain & Overcoming Overwhelm Life can be beautiful and brutal at the same time — and this episode holds space for both.In a tender, raw, and deeply human conversation, Kelsey and Kate explore  their relationships  with pleasure during seasons of exhaustion, pain, and overwhelm.  Together they get honest about intimacy, dissociation, desire, and the longing to feel fully present in their bodies again.  Kelsey shares how she's been reconnecting through water — as a tool for intentionality, nervous system regulation, and moving through life with more care and awareness. Kate opens up about her desire for a Rolodex of care-minded fuck buddies, and what we're really craving when we want to "fuck the pain away." From sensuality and overwhelm to embodiment, disability, and the exhausting mental load of directing your own care — this episode is a space for the messy, nuanced reality of pleasure as both refuge and reconnection. Plus: a surprisingly profound extended ice cream metaphor, you won't want to miss! Raw, reflective, and deeply human — this conversation invites you to ask: what does pleasure look like for you right now, and what would it mean to come back home to yourself with intention? Content note: This episode touches on pain management, substance use, and numbing behaviors. If you're struggling, you are not alone — please reach out to a trusted resource or helpline. 24/7 helpline 844-289-0879 References: Dr Emoto Hidden Messages of Water book - Dr. Emoto Hidden Messages of Water [https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Hidden-Messages-in-Water/Masaru-Emoto/Masaru-Emoto-Legacy-Library/9780743289801] Francis Weller, The Wild Edge of Sorrow - https://www.francisweller.net/books.html [https://www.francisweller.net/books.html] Sinners Movie - https://www.imdb.com/title/tt31193180/ [https://www.imdb.com/title/tt31193180/] Dipsea app for sultry stories- https://www.dipseastories.com/ [https://www.dipseastories.com/] Substance Abuse and Addiction Hotline- 24/7 helpline 844-289-0879 Time Stamps (0:00) – Cold open: Kate's poem about power & disability (1:17) – Intro: Accessing pleasure in times of pain, burnout & overwhelm (2:42) – Check-in: How they're each arriving (tired, overstimulated, survival mode) (4:07) – Balancing Productivity, Pressure & Pleasure  (9:19) – Survival Tip: Pleasure doesn't have to be big (12:00) – Nature as medicine: trees, Mabel, grounding rituals (15:09) – Channeling Tina Turner & calling in divine help (18:20) – Kelsey's go-tos: grief, pain, isolation & connecting with water (23:55) – Dr. Emoto & the healing power of water; whispering intentions into tea (26:00) – Kate's go-tos: Ho'oponopono: talking to your body in pain (29:35) – Pain relief: shame, fear of addiction & Numbing vs. Conscious relief (34:29) — What’s underneath the urge to "want to fuck it away” (38:11) — Kelsey's turning point: grief group, dance improv, The Wild Edge of Sorrow (41:50) — "It doesn't have to be overcoming" — inviting pain to the table instead (43:33) – The healing that comes through authentic connection, art and community (46:01) – The exhaustion of directing: disability, caregivers & communicating every need (49:49) – The Rolodex fantasy: needs, connection & “care fucking” (56:50) – Ableism in dating & the fear of not being enough for a partner (1:01:25) – Challenging conditioned thinking, Pleasure as Power (1:03:41) – Homework time: how are you finding pleasure this week? (1:03:47) — Kelsey: Dipsea app, self-pleasure & exploring orgasm in a new body without pressure (1:06:15) — Kate: masturbation as medicine, breathwork orgasms & the ice cream metaphor (1:10:00) – Ice cream as a metaphor for self-pleasure & exploration (1:13:06) — Outro