How to Help Someone Who Won’t Listen with Amber Hollingsworth

How to Help Someone Who Won’t Listen with Amber Hollingsworth

Today on Simply 1%, we are joined by Amber Hollingsworth, a clinician who focuses on relationships and specializes in working with people and families impacted by addiction. Amber is also the creator of the YouTube channel @Put the Shovel Down. While Amber’s work is rooted in addiction and family recovery, this conversation goes far beyond addiction. It is about relationships, communication, shame, boundaries, over-functioning, and what happens when our desire to help starts to feel like carrying someone else’s life. We talk about how to support someone without enabling them, how to set a boundary without becoming harsh, and why people often cannot hear the truth until they feel seen. Amber shares a simple but powerful distinction: helping usually leaves you feeling good, while enabling often leaves you feeling resentful. This episode is for anyone who has ever tried to get through to someone they love: a partner, child, parent, friend, client, or family member who is stuck, defensive, ashamed, or not ready to face something yet. The Simply 1% shift from Amber: Before you try to get someone to hear you, concentrate on hearing them first.

The Surprising Connection Between Your Hands, Heart & Mind

What do your hands have to do with your thoughts, emotions, memories, and growth? More than you might think. In this episode, Meredith and Wendolyn explore the surprising connection between your hands, your heart, and your mind—and why the simple act of creating, writing, building, or making something by hand can have a profound impact on how you process life. From the "Winter Is Coming Journal" to family recipes, woodworking, childhood memories, gardening, gratitude, and handwriting, this conversation is about preserving what matters before life gets hard. It's about creating reminders for your future self, quieting the mental noise, and reconnecting with the truths you've already learned. Whether you're feeling overwhelmed, overthinking, stuck, or simply trying to be more intentional, this episode offers a simple practice that can help you think more clearly, stay grounded, and remember who you are—even during life's hardest seasons. Because sometimes the smallest things we do with our hands create the biggest changes in our lives.

How to Stop Reacting So Fast: Pause, Gather Information, and Stop Taking It Personally

Have you ever reacted before you had the full story? In this episode, Meredith and Wendolyn talk about the everyday moments when we get annoyed, activated, impulsive, disappointed, or start taking things personally. Through humor, real-life examples, parenting moments, restaurant frustrations, sidewalk irritation, and one unforgettable Donnie Wahlberg story, they explore how to pause before reacting, gather information, repair quickly, and remember that you have options. This conversation is about changing one small variable in the moment instead of trying to change your whole life overnight. This week’s small shift: write down one word, phrase, or reminder you want to practice.

Not Everything Uncomfortable Requires a Boundary

Not everything uncomfortable is a non-negotiable. Sometimes discomfort is a signal that something isn't right. Sometimes it's a boundary that needs to be honored. Sometimes it's fear asking you to stay safe. And sometimes it's the exact place growth is asking you to go. In this episode of Simply 1%, Meredith and Wendolyn continue their conversation on non-negotiables by exploring the difference between protecting your well-being and protecting your discomfort. They discuss tolerance, body awareness, guilt, boundaries, resilience, emotional energy, and why learning to sit with discomfort can help you build confidence, clarity, and self-trust. You'll hear conversations about: • When discomfort is information—and when it's avoidance • The difference between healthy boundaries and protective walls • Why your body remembers experiences your mind may have forgotten • How guilt can show up when you start honoring your needs • The role of tolerance, resilience, and growing through hard things • How to know whether a non-negotiable is serving your well-being or protecting a fear Your Simply 1% this week: Take a few minutes to write down your current non-negotiables. Not to make them permanent, but to get curious about them. Which ones protect your well-being? Which ones protect your comfort? And which ones might be ready for a closer look?

I'm Not Doing That Anymore: The Purpose of Non-Negotiables

What are the things you are simply not willing to do anymore? In this episode of Simply 1%, Meredith and Wendolyn start a conversation about non-negotiables: the boundaries, needs, preferences, and values that protect your peace, energy, relationships, and ability to function well. From reliable cars and orthopedic shoes to sleep, travel, doctors, dating, and the chaos we feel in our bodies, they explore how we often discover our non-negotiables backwards: through resentment, dread, shutdown, repeated conflict, or realizing, “I’m not doing that anymore.” This episode is a reminder that saying no does not mean you are closed off. Sometimes it means you finally know yourself. Your Simply 1% this week: notice where you feel dread, shutdown, resentment, or internal chaos — and ask, “Is this self-inflicted?”