Good Parenting Doesn't Always Feel Good

Good Parenting Doesn't Always Feel Good

Dawn Friedman hosts a solo episode of the Tell Me It Will Be OK podcast for parents raising anxious kids, challenging the belief that good parenting should feel good and arguing that struggle, conflict, and insecurity can be normal signs that an approach needs to change as children grow. She emphasizes that parents can’t control kids’ feelings or behavior—whether a child falls asleep or feels anxious belongs to the child—so the work is to focus on what parents can control, avoid codependent attempts to force change, and use frustration as information to clarify values, boundaries, expectations, and strategies. Using bedtime and sleeping alone as an example, she describes planning for worst-case scenarios and viewing growth as an ongoing process for both child and parent. She also announces “Tell Me It Will Be OK: The Practice,” a weekly guided journaling private podcast with a community, launching July 6, $25/year at OpenBookParenting.com [http://OpenBookParenting.com]. 00:00 Introduction 05:53 Understanding Child Anxiety 06:46 The Bedtime Deep-Dive 12:34 Parenting Is For Parents Too 19:23 Tell Me It Will Be OK: The Practice [http://OpenBookParenting.com]

Selective Mutism: How to Spot It, Support Your Child, and Find Evidence-Based Help (with Dr. Melissa Giglio)

Dawn Friedman welcomes Dr. Melissa Giglio, a CBT therapist and director of Central Health Partners Child Development in Hong Kong, to discuss selective mutism (SM). Giglio explains SM as an anxiety disorder in which children who speak fluently at home are persistently unable to speak in specific settings, often mistaken for stubbornness, and distinguishes shyness from social anxiety and SM using persistence and functional impairment. They emphasize collaborating with schools, using gradual exposure without “rescuing,” helping children habituate, and coaching parents to stay calm, supportive, and non-accommodating while building distress tolerance and confidence. The conversation addresses anxious parents, concerns about traumatizing exposure, demand avoidance and providing perceived control with continued expectations, common comorbidities (including ADHD), when medication may help, and the need for evidence-based, systemic treatment involving parents and schools. Giglio shares resources (Bravery Grows book, a six-month journal) and intensive one-to-one camps in Hong Kong and Maine, plus outcomes when SM is untreated. 00:00 Podcast Welcome 00:17 Meet Dr Giglio 01:47 What Is Selective Mutism 02:44 Why The Name Changed 03:37 Misconceptions And Oppositionality 04:22 How Parents First Notice 05:23 Shy Vs Social Anxiety 06:53 When Anxiety Becomes Persistent 09:43 Supporting Exposure Without Rescue 11:55 Handling Meltdowns And Tiny Steps 13:27 Anxious Parents And Trauma Fears 16:12 PDA And Demand Avoidance Nuance 20:00 Comorbidity And Medication Questions 22:23 Overlearning Through Exposure 22:54 Finding Proper SM Treatment 23:47 Parents As Co Therapists 27:08 Coaching Without Accommodating 28:15 Books And Journals Tools 31:25 Intensive Exposure Camps 33:37 Wins And Progress Stories 35:16 Risks Of Late Identification 37:23 Let Kids Do Hard Things Working with Dr. Giglio at Main Child Therapy Center [https://www.mainechildtherapycenter.com] Grab her book, Bravery Grows [https://bravemightyminds.com] Follow her on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/drmelissagiglio/]

How to Move on After a Mama Meltdown: Guest Podcast with Pam Howard

Dawn Friedman introduces the final May Mental Health Awareness Month guest episode of Tell Me It Will Be OK, featuring Pam Howard of Less Drama More Mama, a licensed clinical social worker, master certified life coach, author, and mom of two. Pam shares two “mama meltdown” stories—one in 2009 with a 3-year-old and newborn when she yelled, threatened consequences, and spanked in rage, and another 13 years later when she yelled at her teen for not getting up for school and threatened a truancy officer. She explains how, instead of spiraling into shame, she practiced self-compassion, sought support, and used the experience as growth, drawing on The Gap and the Gain to focus on progress. Pam describes repairing with her daughters through apology, conversation, and a “family reset,” and invites listeners to forgive themselves and reframe imperfect parenting as an opportunity for change. 00:00 Finale Guest Intro 02:20 What Is a Mama Meltdown 02:51 2009 Breaking Point 04:55 Shame and Wake Up Call 06:17 Meltdown Returns Years Later 07:02 Saboteurs Take Over 08:57 Choosing Self Compassion 10:24 Gap Versus Gain Mindset 11:11 Repairing After the Blowup 13:24 Forgiveness and Growth 15:16 Wrap Up and Coaching Invite Get more of Pam at the following links: Website: Less Drama More Mama [https://lessdramamoremama.com] Instagram: Less Drama More Mama [https://instagram.com/lessdramamama] Facebook: Less Drama More Mama [https://facebook.com/lessdramamoremama] Mentioned in this episode: Tell Me It Will Be OK: The Practice 🌟 READY TO FIND YOUR ROOM TO BREATHE? Tell Me It Will Be OK: The Practice is a weekly, 30-minute audio-guided journaling sanctuary designed to help you connect with your own inner wisdom, calm, and connection.ry a free 30-minute sample session today and lock in your spot on our priority waitlist for the July 8th launch. Get your free sample session at OpenBookParenting.com!

Parenting Older Kids Without Overfunctioning: Guest Podcast with Leah Davidson

In this Mental Health Awareness Month crossover, the Tell Me It Will Be Okay podcast features Leah Davidson [https://leahdavidsonlifecoaching.com/nsr-roadmap/]—speech language pathologist, nervous system resilience coach, host of Building Resilience [https://www.youtube.com/@leahdavidsonlifecoaching], and founder of Resilient Brilliance—sharing an episode on “Parenting Older Kids Without Overfunctioning.” Leah explains that as kids become teens and young adults, parents’ roles shift from constant doing to observing, which can bring grief, relief, confusion, and longing. She argues older kids don’t “borrow” a parent’s regulation the same way; they react to it, so parental urgency, advice, and fixing can feel like pressure or control and create distance. Leah emphasizes regulating yourself to respond rather than reflexively react, set clear boundaries without escalation, and create space that communicates respect and trust. She offers practical cues like pausing, using non-withdrawn silence, and reflecting on effort versus connection. 00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro 01:58 Why Older Kids Hit Hard 03:28 Midlife Focus and Community 05:40 From Borrowing to Reacting 07:36 Regulate Yourself and Set Boundaries 10:00 Space Builds Connection 12:31 The Real Work Is You 14:05 Practical Regulation Tools 15:31 Stop Overfunctioning for Closeness 17:34 Reflection Questions and Wrap Up 19:13 Community Invite and Outro Mentioned in this episode: Tell Me It Will Be OK: The Practice 🌟 READY TO FIND YOUR ROOM TO BREATHE? Tell Me It Will Be OK: The Practice is a weekly, 30-minute audio-guided journaling sanctuary designed to help you connect with your own inner wisdom, calm, and connection.ry a free 30-minute sample session today and lock in your spot on our priority waitlist for the July 8th launch. Get your free sample session at OpenBookParenting.com!

Overcoming Avoidance: Choose Your Path to Success: Guest Podcast with Cynthia Coufal

In recognition of Mental Health Awareness Month, the Tell Me It Will Be Okay Podcast shares its platform with Cynthia Coffel’s Teen Anxiety Maze for an episode titled “Overcoming Avoidance: Choose Your Path to Success,” inspired by Lynn Lyons’ book Anxious Kids, Anxious Parents. Cynthia explains how avoidance temporarily relieves discomfort but reinforces anxiety over time, showing up in everyday procrastination and in teens avoiding school, friends, parties, driving, or homework. She encourages parents and teens to identify meaningful goals, reframe “I have to” into “I choose to,” and use mindset shifts to make difficult tasks more tolerable. Cynthia emphasizes supporting kids through manageable discomfort (not panic), role modeling persistence, and preparing teens for adulthood by practicing doing hard things, and invites listeners to work with her through coaching and an “anxiety audit” call. 00:00 Welcome and Guest Intro 01:26 Meet Teen Anxiety Maze 02:03 Book Series and Coaching Offer 04:27 Why We Avoid Tasks 08:00 Avoidance in Anxious Kids 10:13 Find Goals and Motivation 14:55 School Refusal Mindset Shift 17:33 Choose Versus Have To 20:40 Parenting for Discomfort Skills 26:51 Goal Formula and Role Modeling 29:59 Wrap Up and How to Connect You can learn more about connect with Cynthia by heading to her website, BetterRegulateThanNever.com [https://www.betterregulatethannever.com] and by following her on instagram @cynthiacoufalcoaching [https://www.instagram.com/cynthiacoufalcoaching] Mentioned in this episode: Tell Me It Will Be OK: The Practice 🌟 READY TO FIND YOUR ROOM TO BREATHE? Tell Me It Will Be OK: The Practice is a weekly, 30-minute audio-guided journaling sanctuary designed to help you connect with your own inner wisdom, calm, and connection.ry a free 30-minute sample session today and lock in your spot on our priority waitlist for the July 8th launch. Get your free sample session at OpenBookParenting.com!