Episode 65 - Why So Many Relationships Fail Before They Begin: Love, Timing, and the Truth About Relationships Before Marriage

Episode 65 - Why So Many Relationships Fail Before They Begin: Love, Timing, and the Truth About Relationships Before Marriage

In this episode of The Wedding Chaplain Podcast, David Anderson joins Dr. Freda for a deep and honest conversation about dating, marriage, divorce, and emotional maturity. Together, they explore why so many people rush into relationships before truly understanding themselves and how culture, family history, and unresolved wounds shape the way we love. David shares his own personal story of marrying young, navigating divorce, and what he learned after years of working with more than 1,800 couples preparing for marriage. The discussion dives into why age, time, emotional clarity, and purpose matter more than chemistry alone. In this episode, we discuss: * Why relationships formed too quickly often struggle in the long term * The importance of emotional maturity before marriage * How divorce and broken family systems affect future relationships * Why college relationships sometimes collapse in "real life." * The danger of using relationships to heal unresolved pain * How family patterns and generational habits repeat themselves * Knowing your purpose matters before choosing a partner * The difference between attraction and compatibility This conversation is honest, thoughtful, and deeply practical for singles, engaged couples, divorced individuals, and anyone trying to build healthier relationships moving forward. For Dr Freda's social media accounts, please find them all linked below: https://www.thedrfreda.com/ [https://www.thedrfreda.com/] https://www.facebook.com/fredrikauatkins [https://www.facebook.com/fredrikauatkins] https://www.instagram.com/dr_freda_coaching [https://www.instagram.com/dr_freda_coaching] To watch this on YouTube: https://youtu.be/d5r9O5YEOMQ?si=OWryuteY4iqvqv3T [https://youtu.be/d5r9O5YEOMQ?si=OWryuteY4iqvqv3T] David Anderson's Linktree Profile [https://linktr.ee/chaplaindave] The Wedding Chaplain Website [https://www.weddingchaplain.com/] Pick up a copy of David's Book, Before God and These Witnesses, today: https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses- [https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses-%20Community/dp/1662876270.] Community/dp/1662876270. [https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses-%20Community/dp/1662876270.] Find the Wedding Chaplain on social media: Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theweddingchaplain/] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/wedding_chaplain/] X [https://x.com/weddingchaplain] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidmandersonjr/] Pinterest [https://www.pinterest.com/theweddingchaplain/] Sponsor: EWed Insurance [https://www.weddingchaplain.com/wedding-insurance]

Episode 64 - Five Questions Engaged Couples Need to Wrestle With: An Interview with Kyle Colavitti

Our guest today is Kyle Colavitti. Kyle started out as an actress/writer/director, but once she had kids, she wanted to be home with them and to use her own words and experiences to help people. She and her husband have been married for 22 years, and they have two teenage boys. She likes to say she is a world-class hopeful romantic and to talk to couples about marriage being a marathon… not a sprint. Through her talks and work with couples, she has developed five key questions you have to say yes to before you get married. 1. Do I want to have this man's baby? OR Do I want my DNA implanted in this woman to create another human being that we are committing to taking care of and coparenting for the rest of our lives? 2. Will I still love and want this person, and will they love and want me when we are bald, wrinkled, sagging, deaf, having mobility issues, losing our memory, basically, OLD?! 3. Will I be there for this person, and will they be there for me when we are sick or dying? 4. Will this person be there for me when I bury my parents? And will I be there for them? 5. Am I willing to do whatever it takes to work through our problems and issues? Each of these questions gets you right to the heart of what it takes to be in a long-lasting relationship. It is a great conversation. For Kyle Colavitti's social media accounts, please find them all linked below: https://www.kylecolavitti.com/ [https://www.kylecolavitti.com/] https://substack.com/@kylecola [https://substack.com/@kylecola] https://instagram.com/kylecolavitti [https://instagram.com/kylecolavitti] David Anderson's Linktree Profile [https://linktr.ee/chaplaindave] The Wedding Chaplain Website [https://www.weddingchaplain.com/] Pick up a copy of David's Book, Before God and These Witnesses, today: https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses- [https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses-%20Community/dp/1662876270.] Community/dp/1662876270. [https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses-%20Community/dp/1662876270.] Find the Wedding Chaplain on social media: Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theweddingchaplain/] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/wedding_chaplain/] X [https://x.com/weddingchaplain] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidmandersonjr/] Pinterest [https://www.pinterest.com/theweddingchaplain/] Sponsor: EWed Insurance [https://www.weddingchaplain.com/wedding-insurance]

Episode 63 - Creating a Blockbuster Love Story: The Purpose

Every great movie follows a familiar arc: a beginning that draws us in, tension that tests the characters, and a purpose that gives the story meaning. Marriage works the same way. In this three-part series, David invites engaged and married couples to step back and view their relationships as love stories still being written. Drawing from a recent marriage retreat, these conversations explore the opening scenes of marriage and why intentional dating keeps the story alive, how conflict functions as a necessary turning point rather than a failure, and why the wedding is only the first scene of a much bigger purpose. Whether you are preparing for marriage or have been married for years, this series offers practical insight, thoughtful reflection, and a renewed vision for building a love story that lasts long after the credits roll. For many couples, the story's goal feels like getting together. The wedding feels like the ending. In this episode, David Anderson invites couples to consider a bigger question: why are we together, and what becomes possible because we are? Using familiar stories and movies, this conversation explores how great love stories always point beyond the couple and why marriage works best when it is about more than happiness alone. You will hear why shared purpose gives meaning to sacrifice, how serving together strengthens relationships, and why couples need something they are working toward together. This episode is a powerful closing conversation for engaged couples and a meaningful reset for married couples who want their relationship to be about more than just getting by. To download the Script Workbook that goes along with the sessions, click here: https://www.fbcmassillon.org/_files/ugd/188bab_242573815bd64edd977e0fe302666811.pdf [https://www.fbcmassillon.org/_files/ugd/188bab_242573815bd64edd977e0fe302666811.pdf] David Anderson's Linktree Profile [https://linktr.ee/chaplaindave] The Wedding Chaplain Website [https://www.weddingchaplain.com/] Pick up a copy of David's Book, Before God and These Witnesses, today: https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses- [https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses-%20Community/dp/1662876270.] Community/dp/1662876270. [https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses-%20Community/dp/1662876270.] Find the Wedding Chaplain on social media: Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theweddingchaplain/] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/wedding_chaplain/] X [https://x.com/weddingchaplain] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidmandersonjr/] Pinterest [https://www.pinterest.com/theweddingchaplain/] Sponsor: EWed Insurance [https://www.weddingchaplain.com/wedding-insurance]

Episode 62 - Creating a Blockbuster Love Story: Conflict and Crisis

Every great movie follows a familiar arc: a beginning that draws us in, tension that tests the characters, and a purpose that gives the story meaning. Marriage works the same way. In this three-part series, David invites engaged and married couples to step back and view their relationships as love stories still being written. Drawing from a recent marriage retreat, these conversations explore the opening scenes of marriage and why intentional dating keeps the story alive, how conflict functions as a necessary turning point rather than a failure, and why the wedding is only the first scene of a much bigger purpose. Whether you are preparing for marriage or have been married for years, this series offers practical insight, thoughtful reflection, and a renewed vision for building a love story that lasts long after the credits roll. Every story worth watching includes tension. Marriage is no different. In this episode, David Anderson challenges the idea that healthy couples do not have conflict and explains why conflict is actually part of the story. The real issue is not whether couples have problems, but how they handle them. You will learn why surprise conversations often lead to defensiveness, how avoidance creates distance, and why preparation changes the posture of conflict. This episode also introduces the idea of a planned weekly meeting and a simple agenda that helps couples address real issues without letting conflict spill into every part of their relationship. This episode is especially helpful for couples who feel stuck in the same arguments or who struggle with avoidance, escalation, or miscommunication. To download the Script Workbook that goes along with the sessions, click here: https://www.fbcmassillon.org/_files/ugd/188bab_242573815bd64edd977e0fe302666811.pdf [https://www.fbcmassillon.org/_files/ugd/188bab_242573815bd64edd977e0fe302666811.pdf] David Anderson's Linktree Profile [https://linktr.ee/chaplaindave] The Wedding Chaplain Website [https://www.weddingchaplain.com/] Pick up a copy of David's Book, Before God and These Witnesses, today: https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses- [https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses-%20Community/dp/1662876270.] Community/dp/1662876270. [https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses-%20Community/dp/1662876270.] Find the Wedding Chaplain on social media: Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theweddingchaplain/] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/wedding_chaplain/] X [https://x.com/weddingchaplain] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidmandersonjr/] Pinterest [https://www.pinterest.com/theweddingchaplain/] Sponsor: EWed Insurance [https://www.weddingchaplain.com/wedding-insurance]

Episode 61 - Creating a Blockbuster Love Story: The Script and the Question

Every great movie follows a familiar arc: a beginning that draws us in, tension that tests the characters, and a purpose that gives the story meaning. Marriage works the same way. In this three-part series, David invites engaged and married couples to step back and view their relationships as love stories still being written. Drawing from a recent marriage retreat, these conversations explore the opening scenes of marriage and why intentional dating keeps the story alive, how conflict functions as a necessary turning point rather than a failure, and why the wedding is only the first scene of a much bigger purpose. Whether you are preparing for marriage or have been married for years, this series offers practical insight, thoughtful reflection, and a renewed vision for building a love story that lasts long after the credits roll. Every great love story has a beginning. Before commitment, conflict, or purpose, there is attraction, pursuit, and a question that starts it all. In this episode, David explores why couples stop dating each other, how drift happens quietly over time, and why intentional dating remains foundational long after the wedding day. You will also hear about the importance of continuing to ask the question that started your relationship and why assumptions, while safe, are never romantic. This conversation is especially helpful for engaged couples, but it is just as relevant for married couples who want to reconnect, rediscover curiosity, and keep choosing each other on purpose. To download the Script Workbook that goes along with the sessions, click HERE [https://www.fbcmassillon.org/_files/ugd/188bab_242573815bd64edd977e0fe302666811.pdf] David Anderson's Linktree Profile [https://linktr.ee/chaplaindave] The Wedding Chaplain Website [https://www.weddingchaplain.com/] Pick up a copy of David's Book, Before God and These Witnesses, today: https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses- [https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses-%20Community/dp/1662876270.] Community/dp/1662876270. [https://www.amazon.com/Before-God-These-Witnesses-%20Community/dp/1662876270.] Find the Wedding Chaplain on social media: Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/theweddingchaplain/] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/wedding_chaplain/] X [https://x.com/weddingchaplain] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidmandersonjr/] Pinterest [https://www.pinterest.com/theweddingchaplain/] Sponsor: EWed Insurance [https://www.weddingchaplain.com/wedding-insurance]