Long Distance Friends

What You Need to be Resilient + Handling Resentment as a Military Spouse - with Dr. Michelle Kirk

26.Resilience may look different than you think. And what fuels resilience? We discuss it all in today's episode with doctorate-level performance psychology professional Michelle Kirk. TIMESTAMPS: 00:00 - Introduction and guest background 01:00 - Resilience, recovery, and team sport of military life 02:20 - Understanding resentment and unmet expectations 03:00 - Michelle’s journey into performance and resilience psychology 04:00 - Motivation rooted in athletic experience and studying behavior 05:30 - How resilience differs across domains and the importance of rest 06:50 - Resilience versus grit: definitions and misconceptions 08:36 - Parallels between sports and military family resilience 10:00 - Rest, recovery, burnout, and capacity for resilience 12:12 - Building resilience to handle stress, adversity, and pressure 13:45 - Domains of resilience and areas for self-awareness 15:39 - Unique challenges of military spouse resilience and recovery strategies 17:30 - The importance of community and shared language 18:57 - Recognizing energy depletion and capacity limits 20:12 - Domains of well-being and intentional self-care 22:36 - Practicing intuitive and effective self-care 24:44 - Reframing sacrifice and cultivating gratitude 32:27 - Personal experiences with resentment in military life 33:53 - Expectations, unmet needs, and communication 34:36 - Reflection, self-awareness, and responsibility in resilience 37:03 - Supporting children through deployments and challenges 55:00 - Building community and leveraging local resources 66:50 - Connecting with Michelle for support and follow-up ---------------------------------------- CONNECT WITH MICHELLE KIRK: * Michelle Kirk - LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/michelle-kirk] * Email: mkirk356@gmail.com (or via direct message on Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/michelle.bruns.5]) Michelle Kirk is a doctorate-level performance psychology professional who has spent more than a decade helping military leaders, soldiers, and families build resilience and perform under pressure.  She’s worked with the U.S. Army in roles ranging from leadership coaching and resilience training to developing suicide prevention and deployment support programs.  In addition to her experience working with military populations, she’s coached sports from youth to the college level, worked at several universities across the country teaching sport psychology, principles of behavior change, and coaching courses.  She continues to coach athletes and consult with parents and coaches to help enhance resilience and performance in sport and life. Michelle has earned a Ph.D. in Performance Psychology, a Master's degree in exercise science and is a certified master resilience trainer and mindfulness sport performance enhancement instructor.  Michelle is a military spouse of 10+ years. In those 10 years, Michelle and her husband have logged six cross country moves along with having and raising four children. Through this lived experience, Michelle has developed a passion for supporting military spouses as they navigate the challenges and opportunities of military life to include deployment (and heavy TDY) seasons, relocation, finding community and maintaining connections, and meeting one's own needs (self-care) while always in the service of others.

Guiding Your Kids Through Medical Situations + Deployments, Unpredictability - with Child Life Specialist Mary Frances

25. From handling doctor visits and tough conversations to creating routines that help kids feel safe and secure, this episode is full of practical encouragement for parents in every stage. If you’ve ever wondered how to help your kids cope with change, uncertainty, or big emotions, this conversation with child life specialist Mary Frances will leave you feeling supported and empowered. You'll Learn: * How Medical Play Helps Kids Cope with Fear & Stress * Preparing Kids for Doctor Visits Without Trauma * Practical Ways to Use Medical Play at Home * Advocating for Your Child in Healthcare Settings * Handling the Unpredictability of Military Schedules * How to Talk to Kids About Deployments & Hard Seasons * Raising Resilient Kids Through Truth, Trust & Connection Resources Mentioned: "Curious George Goes to the Dentist" video [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4K0T6ZmY_o] and book [https://www.walmart.com/ip/Curious-George-Visits-the-Dentist-Curious-George-8x8-9780544146112/27548061?wmlspartner=wlpa&selectedSellerId=101094067&adid=2222222222727548061_101094067_14069003552_202077872&wl0=&wl1=g&wl2=c&wl3=42423897272&wl4=pla-2449037643288&wl5=9033423&wl6=&wl7=&wl8=&wl9=pla&wl10=521532765&wl11=online&wl12=27548061_101094067&veh=sem&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=202077872&gbraid=0AAAAADmfBIpJeiDXGDWMmziCKgOmtGjVY&gclid=CjwKCAjwt7XQBhBkEiwAtStpp_9WTw3GXiJ110Pp3KJXBeuCwvRQ5T_xb1WoDjIiJ6wH0qOdL1SEmBoCkLkQAvD_BwE] Ms Rachel Visits the Doctor for a Checkup youtube video [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oEn7XBxOXSw&list=PLd5nujujnZnA0MFZtKtyiUBh9ZsU4plbh]

My SIL Interviews Me - Our Military Fam Journey + Creating Community Everywhere You Go

24. I'm in the guest seat today! We reflect on: * An Iceland trip that was the catalyst for Nate joining the military * Behind the scenes of our dating and early marriage days * Fun and meaningful ways to build community through constant change (and building a life that holds people) * A trip down memory lane remembering the good and the bad of the army bases we've lived at  * The shift from one to two kids—logistics, overwhelm, emotional regulation "Build a life that holds people. And choose people that hold you"

How to Lead Your Team with Courage and Care - with Doreen C. Kelly

23. Board Certified Executive Coach and Head of School (Functional CEO) of 25 years, Doreen C. Kelly, shares several leadership lessons including: * Common Issues Executives Face Today (and How It's Parallel to What We Face as Parents) * Solving Problems vs. Managing Tension * Handling Your Anger and Disappointment With Your Team * How to Frame Courageous Conversations + Constructive Criticism (The SBI framework [https://www.ccl.org/articles/leading-effectively-articles/closing-the-gap-between-intent-vs-impact-sbii/]) * The Importance of Supportive and Honest Friendships That Will Act as a Mirror for You * A Wholistic Approach to Self-Care & Showing Up As Your Best Self * Reflections of a Working Mom This episode is faith-filled, encouraging, warm, and inspiring.  You can reach out to Doreen C. Kelly on Linkedin [https://www.linkedin.com/in/doreenkellycredsgroup/] or at The Creds Group [https://thecredsgroup.com/team].

Why Your Mom Rage Hacks Aren't Working - with Erin Randol, LCSW

22. If you've ever felt debilitating anger with your kids, this episode is for you. Erin Randol, mental health therapist, walks us through PRACTICAL tools that actually move the needle for our body when we feel anger rising and our logical brain has left the building. * Why self-talk and deep breaths aren't cutting it * What our body actually needs when we feel anger rising * The surprising influence of OCD in mom rage Resources Mentioned:  * Postpartum Support International [https://postpartum.net/] * SNAPPY MOM SURVIVAL GUIDE [https://www.sunrisetherapyservicesllc.com/erin-randol-about] (scroll down) - Use code "RAGE" to get for free. You can find Erin Randol on TikTok @momragetherapy [https://www.tiktok.com/@momragetherapy?_r=1&_t=ZP-95luRr9PEfH] and on her website Sunrise Therapy Services LLC [https://www.sunrisetherapyservicesllc.com/].