The Men's Roundtable Series

MRTS Interview Spotlight - Where Traditional Masculinity Fails And Why

Doing everything you were taught and still feeling dead inside is a brutal kind of confusion, especially when you’re “successful” on paper. We sit down with mentor, speaker, and author Jon Symes to name what so many men sense but rarely say out loud: a lot of what gets called traditional masculinity is a tight, modern script that trains men for control, competition, and emotional shutdown, then acts surprised when we feel disconnected from our relationships and ourselves. Jon shares his own path into transformational work and the three shifts that changed everything, including the moment he realized we have agency, the decision to live for something larger than personal gain, and the long shadow a father can leave on a man’s habits and identity. We talk about how real change usually starts: bringing unconscious patterns into awareness, telling the truth about the cost, and using pain as information rather than as a life sentence. If you’ve ever wondered why men struggle to ask for help, why marriages can turn into roommate situations, or why achievement can feel empty, this conversation puts clear language around those experiences. We also reframe “midlife crisis” as something more honest and useful: the precise moment your old stories stop serving you and you choose whether to rewrite them. From there, we expand the idea of an aligned life and challenge the definition of success, pushing past money and status toward stewardship, protection, and responsibility for what sustains life. Along the way, we name hidden narratives that divide us, including the belief that some people matter more than others and the myth that we’re separate from each other and from the planet. If you want a healthier model of masculinity grounded in compassion, strength, and protecting what’s sacred, hit play. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a review so more men can find the conversation. Support the show [https://buymeacoffee.com/theycallmemistayu]

The MRTS: Mental Health May - The Emotional Silence Tax

Silence is not neutral for most men. It either becomes a tool we use with intention, or it becomes a bill we keep paying until it starts charging interest. We sit down as husbands, fathers, brothers, and sons to name that bill out loud: the emotional silence tax. When a man believes he cannot be honest about fear, stress, grief, addiction, shame, or overwhelm, the cost shows up somewhere else, in anger, numbness, isolation, marriage conflict, parenting patience, sleep, and even the will to keep going. We wrestle with a tough question in men’s mental health: how do we stay strong for our families without pretending we are unbreakable? The panel explores why certain roles make it even harder to open up, including high-level leadership, religious leadership, stepfathering, and the added stigma carried by people in addiction and formerly incarcerated men. We also push back on the idea that every hard moment is trauma, because “life is hard” is real, and healthy suffering through discipline, work, and growth can build endurance and character. Then we get practical. Each of us shares the personal signals that tell us we are overloaded, from irritability and isolation to losing creativity and shutting down. We talk about using silence well, when it helps you listen, pause, and de-escalate, and when it starts sending the wrong message to the people you love. We also share real resources, including the 988 Lifeline and the Veteran Crisis Line information, and a simple daily practice that can change your outlook: 30 minutes on a hands-on hobby. If this conversation helps, subscribe, share it with a friend who stays “fine” too often, and leave a review so more men can find it when they are searching in the dark. Support the show [https://buymeacoffee.com/theycallmemistayu]

The MRTS Interview Spotlight: Johnzelle Anderson - Trauma, Identity, and The Whole Man

What if the hardest part of becoming yourself is admitting you were never given the tools to know who you were in the first place? We pull up a chair with licensed therapist and author Johnzelle Anderson for a raw, thoughtful conversation about men’s mental health, identity, and the quiet damage that happens when a child grows up surrounded by miseducation, abuse, neglect, and racism. Johnzelle shares what it was like being mixed race in Southwest Virginia as a Black person “raised in whiteness,” including the confusion of learning hatred from the very people meant to protect you. We dig into how he holds boundaries as a therapist while still staying fully human, why storytelling can build real rapport, and how more Black men are embracing therapy since 2020. Along the way, we talk anxiety, relationships, parenting, employment stress, and the real-life weight that shows up behind closed doors when men finally decide they’re done surviving. We also explore his memoir, Mixtape and Memoir, and the idea of unlearning as an ongoing process rather than a neat ending. Johnzell takes us to West Africa, from Ghana to Sierra Leone, and explains how reclaiming roots and legacy can heal places a father never tended. The episode lands on a simple practice that’s tougher than it sounds: “Be kind to yourself, and I’ll do the same.” Subscribe for more honest conversations on restoration, share this with a man who needs it, and leave a review with the biggest takeaway you’re still thinking about. Support the show [https://buymeacoffee.com/theycallmemistayu]

🎙️ The Men’s Roundtable Series: Business vs. Busyness— Part 5: The Legacy (Building What Outlives You)

You can be exhausted, booked, and “productive” while still avoiding the only work that actually builds a business. We wrap the final installment of our Business Vs Busyness series with a raw look at what counts as real business and what is just busywork with a nice logo. Along the way, we share listener reactions, what we’ve learned from five weeks of honest talk, and why this kind of transparency hits so hard for men and families watching from the outside. Core Question: Which is the one you struggle with most personally: DOING, DELEGATING, DEFERRING, DELETING? 1. DONE — “This is my weight to carry.” 2. DELEGATED — “This is not beneath me, but it is not meant to be on me.” 3. DEFERRED — “This is real, but not right now.” 4. DELETED — “This weakens my focus, my presence, or my purpose.” * ⚡ Another Tough Question: “What is the one 'good' thing you are currently doing that you need to quit today so that you can finally focus on the 'great' thing you were called to do?” * ⚡ Yet Another Tough Question: “If you continued living exactly the way you did last week for the next ten years, would you arrive at a life you actually want to own?” If you’ve been stuck in hustle mode, let this be your reset. Subscribe for the next series, share this with a friend who’s burning out, and leave a review so more people can find the show. What “good” thing do you need to drop so you can finally pursue the great? Support the show [https://buymeacoffee.com/theycallmemistayu]

MRTS Spotlight with David Helfand: Why Marriages Break Down - Bringing Couples Back From the Edge

A marriage doesn’t usually end because two people suddenly stop caring. It ends because the relationship becomes the place where stress, resentment, and shutdown live, and neither person knows how to get regulated enough to reach the love that’s still there. We sit down with licensed psychologist Dr. David Helfand, a marriage retreat specialist with a neuroscience background, to talk about what actually drives couples to the brink and what helps them pull back. We unpack the difference between a peaceful marriage and a happy one, including how “keeping the peace” can quietly turn into fawning, avoidance, and a slow loss of intimacy. Dr. David also challenges the lazy stereotype that men only want sex by describing how many men’s needs shift with age toward emotional connection, feeling wanted, and being pursued. When that truth stays unspoken, couples can slip into sexless marriage patterns, embarrassment, and blame that never touches the real issue. From there, we get practical about why couples therapy often fails when conflict triggers fight or flight and the frontal lobe goes offline. Dr. David explains regulation and co-regulation, why “compatibility” is often a skills problem, and how parenting stress and the pandemic intensified the pressure by removing escapism and forcing couples to face what they’d been avoiding. He also shares a clear framework for rebuilding: communication, regulation, prioritization, and intimacy, plus how an intensive marriage retreat differs from traditional weekly therapy. If you care about divorce prevention, healthier conflict, and rebuilding emotional intimacy, listen through and then share this with someone who needs hope. Subscribe, leave a review, and tell us what topic you want next: what’s the hardest conversation in your relationship right now? Support the show [https://buymeacoffee.com/theycallmemistayu]