Transforming Us Podcast

Moving From Autopilot to Agency on Your Enneagram Journey

Most of us are living on autopilot, caught in patterns of protection—believing who we are is tied to the masks we wear. But what if true freedom isn't a distant dream, but a simple choice? In this solo episode with Jess, she peels back the layers of the Enneagram, attachment theory, and parts work—showing you how to wake up, notice your patterns, and step into your real self with power and clarity. This isn’t about complicated systems or labels—it's about turning awareness into action. You'll discover how to pause your reactive tendencies with the STOP method, harness God's unlimited resources for inner strength, and finally move from living in fear to living with intention. She shares the emotional journey of her own discernment, leaning into ministry, daring to become, and embracing the God led invitation to be truly yourself. She breaks down practical tools to recognize your adaptive masks—whether you’re the fixer, the peacemaker, or the perfectionist—and how to use pattern awareness to break free. Dive into the process of shifting from exhaustion to joy, from surviving to thriving, grounded in God's abundant grace. This episode is essential if you’re tired of autopilot and ready to live with purpose, wholeness, and authentic joy. Are you ready to step out of automatic/autopilot and into the fullness of who you're meant to be? Join Jess on this powerful journey of transformation—because your real self is waiting to be awakened, loved, and finally set free. Interested in Shint Eyes Retreat? Check our Airbnb listings: * Entire Retreat (sleeps 12) [https://www.airbnb.ca/rooms/789915369797687692?check_in=2026-04-28&check_out=2026-04-30&search_mode=regular_search&adults=1&children=0&infants=0&pets=0&source_impression_id=p3_1774976760_P3S1Dq-_UTuzOXog&previous_page_section_name=1000&federated_search_id=43be5dac-bf2d-4c9b-9d77-3e272f4b4fac] * Cozy Cabin (sleeps 3) [https://www.airbnb.ca/rooms/789897090480373546?check_in=2026-04-28&check_out=2026-04-30&search_mode=regular_search&adults=1&children=0&infants=0&pets=0&source_impression_id=p3_1774976760_P3mGeIP4M1s9CA2R&previous_page_section_name=1000&federated_search_id=43be5dac-bf2d-4c9b-9d77-3e272f4b4fac] * Shipping Container (sleeps 3) [https://www.airbnb.ca/rooms/923952952308817537?check_in=2026-04-29&check_out=2026-05-01&search_mode=regular_search&adults=1&children=0&infants=0&pets=0&source_impression_id=p3_1774976760_P3SxMioLYxVRenkx&previous_page_section_name=1000&federated_search_id=43be5dac-bf2d-4c9b-9d77-3e272f4b4fac] * Geodesic Dome (sleeps 5) [https://www.airbnb.ca/rooms/789153175095442827?check_in=2026-04-29&check_out=2026-04-30&search_mode=regular_search&adults=1&children=0&infants=0&pets=0&source_impression_id=p3_1774976760_P3DUFzPTfOv7tfox&previous_page_section_name=1000&federated_search_id=43be5dac-bf2d-4c9b-9d77-3e272f4b4fac]

From Eye-Rolls to Empathy: The Enneagram for Teen Self-Awareness and Compassion

Being a teenager often feels like operating a complex engine without a manual, leaving both kids and parents overwhelmed by unnamed pressures. In this episode of Transforming Us, Jess and Travis explore how the Enneagram serves as that missing guide, moving beyond mere "types" to the heart of teen self-awareness. We discuss how understanding their unique wiring helps teens trade self-criticism for compassion, allowing them to see their struggles through the lens of a divine design rather than a limiting label. By sharing stories of how even the youngest family members can develop intuition about others' motivations, we show how this framework builds a bridge from conflict to connection. We’ll break down how to use scriptural truths alongside the Enneagram to anchor a teen’s identity in Christ, helping them navigate the social minefields of high school with grace and clarity. This isn’t just about easier parenting; it’s about equipping the next generation to move through the world with kindness and a deep sense of purpose. Whether your teen is an open book or a locked vault, hit play to discover how to turn the "what is wrong with me?" into "how did God design me to grow? Discover more about our coaching and resources at our website transformingus.org [http://transformingus.org/]. Lots of FREE guides and assessments for your journey. Do you need help understanding your patterns? Book your FREE 30 min discovery call today! Go to Connect [https://www.transformingus.org/connect]. Youtube: @transformingus [https://www.youtube.com/@transformingus] Instagram: @transformingus [https://www.instagram.com/transforming_us_coaching] Facebook: @transformingus [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61579352282196]

Enneagram 6: One Woman’s Journey of Receiving Courage, Trust and Security with Rissa Messer

Most people associate the Enneagram Six with fear and anxiety — but what if that very fear is a powerful gateway to profound trust and freedom? Rissa Messer, a loyal guardian with a heart for the vulnerable, opens up about her raw, courageous journey from anxiety, grief, and insecurity, to discovering unshakeable security in God's love. In this episode, Rissa shares how her deep love of people and her relentless need for safety impacts her family and her 6-9 pairing in marriage. She vividly describes her ongoing battle with mental chatter, her slow emotional processing, and the ways her faith has become the anchor that holds her steady through life's storms. You'll hear about her practices—like meditating on certainties and intentionally surrendering control—that are transforming her from a restless pursuer of safety to a rooted lover of the present moment in trust. We break down: how the victory over fear comes through dependence on God, not reassurance from people; the power of embracing the mystery of life with curiosity instead of control; and the vital practices that keep her grounded — even amid loss, trauma, and uncertainty. If you're tired of striving, seeking external validation, or feeling haunted by "what ifs," this episode is your invitation to step into freedom—your true, beautiful, and secure identity in Christ. Whether you're navigating grief, anxiety, or simply longing for peace in chaos, Rissa’s vulnerability and insights will inspire you to rest in the unshakeable love of your Creator.This episode is a call to lean into the mystery, and embracing your true belovedness. It’s perfect for anyone craving peace and freedom from the bondage of fear. To chat with Rissa Email: candcmesser@gmail.com Discover more about our coaching and resources at our website transformingus.org [http://transformingus.org/]. Lots of FREE guides and assessments for your journey. Do you need help understanding your patterns? Book your FREE 30 min discovery call today! Go to Connect [https://www.transformingus.org/connect]. Youtube: @transformingus [https://www.youtube.com/@transformingus] Instagram: @transformingus [https://www.instagram.com/transforming_us_coaching] Facebook: @transformingus [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61579352282196]

Enneagram 7: Finding Joy and Connection in Your Relationship with Christa Hardin, MA

In this episode, we dive into the vibrant world of the Enneagram 7, exploring how these adventurous spirits find joy and connection in their relationships. We sit down with relationship expert Christa Hardin, MA, who brings over 20 years of experience in clinical psychology and marriage research to the table. Christa shares insights from her "Glow Theory," explaining the fascinating patterns that emerge when couples' numbers come together. We discuss what happens when a pairing moves into "Glow"—operating from a place of health and connection—versus falling into "Shadow" dynamics. Christa also introduces an exciting new quiz designed for couples to explore their Enneagram types and instincts within the context of marriage. This is a fantastic addition to her best-selling book The Enneagram in Marriage. Whether she is writing, teaching, coaching, or vacationing with her family, Christa brings a sense of adventure and joy to everything she does. Integrating decades of work in the therapy room with deep Enneagram knowledge, she offers practical, faith-informed tools to help you understand your personality dynamics and build a lasting, meaningful connection. About Christa Hardin: Christa Hardin, MA, is a relationship expert and author of the best-selling book, The Enneagram in Marriage: Your Guide to Thriving Together in Your Unique Pairing, which details all 45 possible Enneagram pairings. A graduate of Wheaton College, she is the host of the Enneagram & Marriage Podcast—with over one million downloads—and will soon be releasing her second book focusing on the "Three Desires." Here are the links to connect with Christa Hardin and explore her resources: * Website: EnneagramandMarriage.com [https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/] * Apple Podcast: Enneagram & Marriage Podcast [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/enneagram-and-marriage/id1493137938] (also available on Spotify and other major platforms) * Quiz for Couples: QuizForCouples.com [https://www.quizforcouples.com/] * Instagram: @enneagramandmarriage [https://www.instagram.com/enneagramandmarriage] Discover more about our coaching and resources at our website transformingus.org [http://transformingus.org/]. Lots of FREE guides and assessments for your journey. Do you need help understanding your patterns? Book your FREE 30 min discovery call today! Go to Connect [https://www.transformingus.org/connect]. Youtube: @transformingus [https://www.youtube.com/@transformingus] Instagram: @transformingus [https://www.instagram.com/transforming_us_coaching] Facebook: @transformingus [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61579352282196] Interested in Shint Eyes Retreat? Check our Airbnb listings: * Entire Retreat (sleeps 12) [https://www.airbnb.ca/rooms/789915369797687692?check_in=2026-04-28&check_out=2026-04-30&search_mode=regular_search&adults=1&children=0&infants=0&pets=0&source_impression_id=p3_1774976760_P3S1Dq-_UTuzOXog&previous_page_section_name=1000&federated_search_id=43be5dac-bf2d-4c9b-9d77-3e272f4b4fac] * Cozy Cabin (sleeps 3) [https://www.airbnb.ca/rooms/789897090480373546?check_in=2026-04-28&check_out=2026-04-30&search_mode=regular_search&adults=1&children=0&infants=0&pets=0&source_impression_id=p3_1774976760_P3mGeIP4M1s9CA2R&previous_page_section_name=1000&federated_search_id=43be5dac-bf2d-4c9b-9d77-3e272f4b4fac] * Shipping Container (sleeps 3) [https://www.airbnb.ca/rooms/923952952308817537?check_in=2026-04-29&check_out=2026-05-01&search_mode=regular_search&adults=1&children=0&infants=0&pets=0&source_impression_id=p3_1774976760_P3SxMioLYxVRenkx&previous_page_section_name=1000&federated_search_id=43be5dac-bf2d-4c9b-9d77-3e272f4b4fac] * Geodesic Dome (sleeps 5) [https://www.airbnb.ca/rooms/789153175095442827?check_in=2026-04-29&check_out=2026-04-30&search_mode=regular_search&adults=1&children=0&infants=0&pets=0&source_impression_id=p3_1774976760_P3DUFzPTfOv7tfox&previous_page_section_name=1000&federated_search_id=43be5dac-bf2d-4c9b-9d77-3e272f4b4fac]

Enneagram 9: Moving Beyond the Numbers to Center with Marilyn Vancil

In this episode, we explore the intersection of Christian spirituality and the Enneagram with spiritual director Marilyn Vancil. The conversation centers on the transformative journey from the Adapted Self—the version of us shaped by external expectations—to the Authentic Self, our true identity as a reflection of God’s image. Marilyn explains that the Enneagram is not a restrictive label but a powerful tool for inner freedom, helping us move beyond ego-driven patterns and toward a life centered with God. A significant focus is placed on the Enneagram Nine, specifically their struggle with self-identity and the vital role of emotional awareness. Marilyn highlights how acknowledging suppressed anger is a key catalyst for Nines to reclaim their presence. Through practices like centering prayer, listeners are invited to move beyond surface-level traits into a state of drawing toward the center of the enneagram. This process of recognition and formation allows for a more grounded life where our seeds can shed, then sprout and grow. The episode explores how these dynamics revolutionize our relationships. By recognizing the "adapted" versions of ourselves and others, we can navigate conflict with greater compassion and empathy. Marilyn outlines the stages of spiritual growth, illustrating how the Enneagram serves as a map for moving through patterns toward an integrated way of being. Whether seeking deeper self-discovery or a closer connection with Christ, this episode offers a roadmap for finding your true, authentic self. Connect with Marilyn: www.marilynvancil.com [http://www.marilynvancil.com/] Her books: Self to Lose Self to Find [https://a.co/d/0h0DLN2h] & Beyond the Enneagram [https://a.co/d/0gBE1X6z] Discover more about our coaching and resources at our website transformingus.org [http://transformingus.org/]. Lots of FREE guides and assessments for your journey. Do you need help understanding your patterns? Book your FREE 30 min discovery call today! Go to Connect [https://www.transformingus.org/connect]. YouTube: @transformingus [https://www.youtube.com/@transformingus] Instagram: @transformingus [https://www.instagram.com/transforming_us_coaching] Facebook: @transformingus [https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61579352282196]