#70 Slow The F#ck Down

#74 Relationship Pillar 2: The Lost Art of True Intimacy

Most men think they know their partner ...   Here's a quick test:  Can you name her three deepest fears right now? Not her general worries. Her deepest fears. That moment of hesitation is what this episode is about.   What we cover: * Why intimacy and sex are not the same thing, and how crossing wires quietly kills connection * How it's possible to share a bed for 20 years and still never truly know your partner * What a woman actually needs to feel safe enough to open, and how most men miss this entirely * How emotional disconnection gets translated into sexual hunger, and why that eventually kills the spark * Why the flame goes out, and what's actually behind it  *   This is Pillar 2 of 4. Each episode in this series gives you one foundational skill for building a relationship that lasts.   Want to go deeper? Gareth runs a free 60-minute training called the Magnetic Masculine Masterclass that explores the patterns keeping men stuck in exactly this dynamic.   If you're curious, click here to send a WhatsApp message and immediately receive the link:  [https://digital.fatherssonsbrothers.com/Whatsapp]https://digital.fatherssonsbrothers.com/Whatsapp [https://digital.fatherssonsbrothers.com/Whatsapp]  [https://digital.fatherssonsbrothers.com/Whatsapp]   Make sure you subscribe so you don't miss Pillars 3 and 4.   And if you want to watch episode 1 of the series check it out here:  #73 Relationship Pillar 1: Inner Work - The Foundation https://youtu.be/xJiQ16Q4dAk [https://youtu.be/xJiQ16Q4dAk]

#73 Relationship Pillar 1: Inner Work - The Foundation

The Four Pillars of a Relationship. Pillar 1: Inner Work: The Foundation Most men want to fix their relationship. When we work with them, they realise the relationship isn't the problem.  In the first episode of our Four Pillars series, Gareth and Matt lay the foundation that supports everything else: the inner work most men skip. They also unpack why skipping the inner work means repeating the same pattern in every relationship you have.   Doing the inner work changes everything. It starts by seeing yourself clearly.   🔥 Get the free Magnetic Masculine Masterclass - identify your specific pattern. Click the link below, send a WhatsApp message and receive your link to the training: Whatsapp Matt Dahse [https://api.whatsapp.com/send/?phone=17134460104&text=I%20want%20the%20masterclass]   Want to go deeper? 🎧 Episode 72 - Go deeper on the six mother-wound patterns that drive most men's relationship struggles: YouTube#72 You're Not Dating Her, You're Dating Your Mother Wound - 6 patterns sabotaging your relationship  [https://youtu.be/_xSUCqikr0E]    The Fathers Sons Brothers Podcast is hosted by Gareth Pickering and Matt Dahse. New episodes every Thursday.

#72 You're Not Dating Her, You're Dating Your Mother Wound - 6 patterns sabotaging your relationship

The relationship challenges you’re experiencing today didn’t begin with your partner. They began with the very first intimate relationship you ever had. Long before you knew what love was supposed to look like, your nervous system was already learning: whether it was safe to be seen, whether your needs would be met. That teacher was your mother. And the strategies you developed to navigate that first relationship followed you into every connection you’ve had since. They may be shaping how you love, how you shut down, and why some men find themselves repeating the same relationship patterns no matter how much they want things to be different. In this episode of the Father Sons Brothers Podcast, Gareth and Matt explore the six core mother wounds at the root of most relationship patterns in men, and the shadow work required to finally break the cycle. In this episode, you will discover: * The six core mother wounds: the Approval Seeker, the Emotional Caretaker, the Avoidant Man, the Good Boy, the Hyper-Independent Man, and the Little Prince. Find out which one is most alive in you * Why the Good Boy is the most common relationship wound Gareth and Matt see in men, and how niceness, agreeability and hidden desire slowly drain polarity from your relationship * What reparenting means in practice, and the three S’s of transformation that take a man from recognising his childhood patterns to genuinely changing them * Why doing this shadow work alone can make lasting change harder to reach, and what real brotherhood looks like for men serious about growth Whether you're deep in this work or just beginning, this episode will give you something real to take into your relationships. Press play. ADDITIONAL RESOURCES: In this episode Gareth and Matt reference Dr. Robert Glover’s work on the Nice Guy [https://youtu.be/Gs4IlKR8G_4?si=Gkg1xJoCoM9T7MEy], author of No More Mr. Nice Guy. If the Good Boy wound resonated with you, Ep 39 is a great next listen. RELATIONSHIP FUNDAMENTALS FOR MEN We’ve just released a brand-new masterclass: The Magnetic Masculine: Relationship Fundamentals for Men. This potent 60-minute training gives you the relationship tools you should have learnt in school but didn’t. Around 30 minutes of teaching, followed by 30 minutes of powerful journaling prompts. Whether you’re single and searching, recently heartbroken, or in a relationship that needs some spark. This free training is for you. Join Gareth inside the Magnetic Masculine Masterclass here: https://www.fatherssonsbrothers.com/mmm-register [https://www.fatherssonsbrothers.com/mmm-register] ABOUT YOUR HOSTS Gareth Pickering [https://garethpickering.com/] is an artist and thought leader. His inspiration is to create spaces for men to have open, honest conversations that shift their mindsets and help them live life to the fullest. He’s a human connection specialist who guides others to level up with their lives through “relationships”. Relationships are a rocket ship for personal development. Gareth provides the tools and maps to fly and land your rocket safely. Connect with him on: Website [https://garethpickering.com/], Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/garethpickering/], LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/gareth-pickering/], YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/user/garethpickers], Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/itsmegareth/] Matt Dahse is a father and conscious creator, designing pathways for men to follow to unlock their potential and step into their power.

#71 Relationships - Your Greatest Playground for Transformation with Simon Paul Sutton

Your relationship will either wake you up or wear you down. It is one of the most powerful vehicles for personal transformation. It is also one of the most meaningful parts of a well-lived life. Yet almost no one teaches you how to do relationships well. So, you improvise. Well-intentioned men and women spend years stuck in the same loops, arguments and emotional explosions. They feel the pain, but they do not understand the pattern. They want depth, but they do not have the tools. In this episode of the Father Sons Brothers Podcast, Gareth talks with Simon Paul Sutton, internationally recognised facilitator, coach, speaker, and author. Simon spent two days with Gareth at his home on the Garden Route in South Africa, where this raw and honest conversation was recorded. They go deep and speak about the truth about shadow, intimacy, breakups and personal growth. In this episode, you will discover: * Why most couples avoid radical honesty, and how that avoidance destroys connection * A simple and playful framework to meet the different parts of your psyche, including the ones you try to hide * How Simon used parts work to navigate his most recent relationship ending with maturity and self-leadership * How Gareth and Simon found their way into men’s work, and why expanding consciousness is not optional for anyone who wants to live a powerful life If you want a better relationship, start by becoming a better man - press play.   Additional resources: RELATIONSHIP FUNDAMENTALS FOR MEN We've just released a brand-new masterclass: The Magnetic Masculine - Relationship Fundamentals for Men. This 3-part video training gives you the relationship tools you should have learnt in school but didn't. So, whether you're single and searching, recently heartbroken or in a connection that needs some spark - this free training is for you. Join Gareth inside the Magnetic Masculine Masterclass here:  https://www.fatherssonsbrothers.com/mmm-register [https://www.fatherssonsbrothers.com/mmm-register]      ABOUT OUR GUEST Simon Paul Sutton is an internationally recognised facilitator, coach, speaker, sex-educator, tantric practitioner, author, and podcast host. From a journey through crime and addiction to embodied truth and radical honesty, Simon has impacted thousands worldwide.  Author of Self Love Now and Burglar to Buddha, Simon is also the creator of ROOTED, somatic coaching for men’s emotional maturity, conscious sexuality, and embodied presence. He co-created Naked Soul, immersive group experiences for a new story of humanity, and Enlighten Up!, a transformational mashup of teachings, music, spoken word, and unapologetic fun. Simon reminds us: life is a gift, pleasure is a portal, love is the answer, and play is the way. Connect with him on:  Website [https://simonpaulsutton.com/], Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/simontransparently], YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/SimonTransparently], Facebook [https://web.facebook.com/simonpaulsutton/about]   ABOUT YOUR HOST Gareth Pickering [https://garethpickering.com/] is an artist and thought leader. His inspiration is to create spaces for men to have open, honest conversations that shift their mindsets and help them live life to the fullest. He’s a human connection specialist who guides others to level up with their lives through “relationships”. Relationships are a rocket ship for personal development. Gareth provides the tools and maps to fly and land your rocket safely. Connect with him on:  Website [https://garethpickering.com/], Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/garethpickering/], LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/gareth-pickering/], YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/user/garethpickers], Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/itsmegareth/]

#70 Slow The F#ck Down

I sit down with co-creator, Lenerd Louw to explore a radical idea in a world that won’t stop moving: what if the real power move is to slow the fuck down? We unpack the cost of over-scheduling, burnout, and living on autopilot, and contrast it with what becomes possible when a man designs his life in alignment with his soul. This conversation isn’t about doing more or fixing yourself. It’s about tuning into the truth that already lives inside you and having the courage to listen. This episode also offers a behind-the-scenes look at the inspiration behind Soul Safari — our transformational men’s retreat into the wilds of South Africa. Created for men who feel the quiet whisper of their soul calling for something more, Soul Safari is an invitation to unplug, reset, and reconnect to what really matters. SOUL SAFARI: 17-27 MARCH 2026 | SOUTH AFRICA You weren’t put on this earth to grind, scroll, and survive until the weekend. Over 11 days in South Africa’s wildest landscapes, you’ll step out of your normal routine and into a sacred container of brotherhood, stillness, and soul-awakening clarity. We strip back the noise. Go off the grid. Sit in silence. Share around the fire. And listen deeply to what life is really asking of you. This isn’t just a retreat. It’s a reset. And it might just change the next decade of your life. Apply now: https://www.fatherssonsbrothers.com/soul-safari/?coupon_code=SOULCORE [https://www.fatherssonsbrothers.com/soul-safari/?coupon_code=SOULCORE]  Soul Safari Only 10 spots available  THE KING'S CIRCLE: A DOJO FOR INTEGRATED LEADERS An integrated leader recognises that we all have inner work to do. So, these new-paradigm leaders seek out people, processes, and places that help them identify and integrate their blind spots. Each month, Fathers Sons Brothers hosts the King's Circle, a free two-hour transformational leadership training experience. It’s a men-only space where visionaries gather to learn tools and frameworks that make them better communicators and more integrated leaders. When you regularly invest in this type of training: - You gain access to a space where men from all over the world support and encourage you to show up at your best. - You get clear on what you came here to do. - You reconnect with your mission. - You recognise where you’re leaking energy, and you reclaim that power to allocate towards serving your mission. - You develop more trust in yourself, and this improvement is reflected in all your relationships. - You feel inspired and excited about our brave new world, as you connect deeper with the other Integrated Leaders through the King’s Circle. All growth after puberty is optional and the men who attend our circle have a growth mindset like you. We support each other in becoming the new paradigm of courageous leaders we've been waiting for. Secure your free seat in The King’s Circle here: https://www.fatherssonsbrothers.com/kings-circle. [https://www.fatherssonsbrothers.com/kings-circle.] ABOUT OUR GUEST Lenerd achieved success relatively early in his life, running Marketing and Advertising for a big direct insurance group in South Africa in his early thirties and becoming a CEO in his early forties. However, in his mid-forties, he had a strong inner voice telling him to change everything in his life. It did not make any sense, so he distracted himself with sex, drugs and jacuzzis for four years. What seemed glamorous on the outside was actually a deep, dark, desperate time on the inside. Eventually, in 2013, after this deep dark night of the soul, he heeded the call, resigned, sold and gave away most of his possessions, bought a backpack and a one-way ticket to Lima in Peru, which started a five-year, 35-country journey around the world. He attended numerous workshops and initiations on spirituality and sexuality around the world. His next destination was always based on where the next learning opportunity was. In 2019 Lenerd’s memoir, JUMP! An epic soul and sex adventure was published across all major bookstores in Southern Africa which led him to being approached by men in similar situations to which he was in, way back then. Connect with him on: Website [https://lenerdlouw.com/], Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/lenerd_louw/#], Linkedin [https://www.linkedin.com/in/lenerd-louw/], YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCMaoGz4grppmxdYratj8wpw], Facebook [https://web.facebook.com/lenerd.louw.21?_rdc=1&_rdr#] ABOUT YOUR HOST Gareth Pickering is an artist and thought leader. His inspiration is to create spaces for men to have open and honest conversations that shift their mindset and live life to the fullest. He’s a human connection specialist who guides others to level up with their lives through “relationships”. Relationships are a rocket ship for personal development. Gareth provides the tools and maps to fly and land your rocket safely. Connect with him on: Website [https://garethpickering.com/], Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/garethpickering/], Linkedin [https://www.linkedin.com/in/gareth-pickering/], X [https://twitter.com/garethpickering/status/1485729202208915470], Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/itsmegareth/]