Serving first: The key to finding community in the military
About this episode
In this episode of Anchored & Armed, LTC Brittany Simmons, USA (Ret.), shares hard-earned wisdom about finding real, lasting, Christ-centered community through every stage of military life.
A 2002 graduate of United States Military Academy and retired Military Police officer with 20 years of Army service, Brittany reflects on deployments, loneliness, marriage, motherhood, PCS moves, and the challenge of building authentic relationships in constantly changing environments. She explains how God met her in seasons of isolation, why serving is often the key to belonging, and how military women can contribute meaningful leadership and perspective within the local church.
Whether you are a Christian woman serving in uniform, a military spouse, or someone searching for biblical community in a transient military lifestyle, this conversation offers practical encouragement grounded in lived experience.
Resources for listeners:
* Summer Celebration #4B (OCF Sisterhood – Women's Track) [https://www.springcanyon.org/event/summer-celebration-4b-ocf-sisterhoodwomens-track/]
* "A new take on the 'armor of God': The power of fighting as a unit" on OCF Crosspoint [https://www.ocfusa.org/2026/01/a-new-take-on-the-armor-of-god-the-power-of-fighting-as-a-unit/]
* OCF Directory [https://www.ocfusa.org/directory/]
* Discover OCF's Women's Ministry [https://www.ocfusa.org/sisterhood/]
* Contact the podcast via email (anchored@ocfusa.org)
* Access the Anchored & Armed contact form [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScRfAVj0Qc5FgN94ygU2sE7T5xcw6ltpuGIJ2pcv9WckyGBmw/viewform]
Questions answered and themes covered in this interview include:
How can Christian military women find real community during military assignments and deployments?
Brittany is candid that strong Christian community early in her career—at West Point through OCF, and in her first assignment in Germany—almost spoiled her for what came next. Later assignments brought real loneliness, particularly at Fort Hood and during deployments where time was so limited she describes working "a six-and-a-half-day week."
During a difficult deployment to Iraq, she prayed specifically: "God, I need a friend." The answer came through a fellow West Point graduate and OCF friend who ended up assigned just a trailer away—a friendship now nearly 26 years old. She emphasizes that those early military friendships matter more than they may seem in the moment, and that staying connected through tools like Marco Polo and group messaging makes it possible to maintain meaningful Christian friendships across decades and duty stations.
Why is serving important for building Christian community in military life?
One of the biggest shifts in Brittany's family's approach to church came when they stopped asking where they belonged and started asking where they could serve. When she and her husband arrived at their church in Indianapolis, they told leadership early: "We really want to jump in and serve." That posture opened doors quickly.
She notes that serving alongside others builds trust naturally—"those folks start to become your community"—in the same way that a shared military background creates an immediate bond between strangers. She also encourages listeners not to overlook small or behind-the-scenes opportunities, pointing out that churches always need people willing to help with children, clean kitchens, stuff envelopes, or maintain outdoor spaces. Faithful, unglamorous service, she says, is often the foundation for the deepest Christian fellowship.
What should I look for in a healthy church as a Christian military family?
Brittany points to several practical signs. First, people are genuinely interested in hearing and sharing stories—there's a culture of listening, not just programming. Second, the workload is distributed; it's not the same few people doing everything. Third, people are placed in roles that match their gifts rather than being pressured into poor fits. Fourth, the church is both inward- and outward-facing, serving its members and the surrounding community.
She anchors much of this in 1 Corinthians 12, noting that "the body needs that to be healthy"—every role, including the unseen ones, matters. She adds that military families should also look for theological alignment, though her focus in this conversation is primarily on community health from a relational standpoint.
Can a Christian woman in uniform connect meaningfully with civilian church women?
Brittany initially assumed she would have little in common with women who hadn't served—and she's honest that she had to work through that. What she found was that women in leadership roles outside the military face many of the same challenges, and they were genuinely curious about her perspective.
Rather than creating distance, her military experience added something. She introduced concepts like "battle buddy" and "commander's intent" into her church's women's ministry, and the language resonated. Her head pastor still references commander's intent—the idea of giving clear guidance and trusting people to execute without micromanaging—as a leadership principle that shaped how he thinks about his role. "We've got stuff to share," Brittany says. "Not all women just want to do teas and pink—there's a lot more out there than I think we realize."
How do I stop waiting to be invited and actually build Christian community?
Brittany acknowledges that adult friendship is hard, and that the higher you climb in the military, the more the community thins out. But she pushes back on passivity directly: "Sometimes God needs us to do the inviting." She references a podcast that challenged her personally on the concept of "going first"—asking someone to coffee, and if they say no, moving to the next person.
She frames this as consistent with military identity: women in uniform are already trained to lead and take initiative, and that same posture applies to building Christian relationships. She also cautions against waiting indefinitely for circumstances to be perfect: "Sometimes we sit around waiting too long for God to just plop something in our laps—and I think that's kind of being a lazy Christian."