Defiance of Silence - A Sacred Witness

Breanna - Moral Injury

The hardest part of trauma is not always what happened. Sometimes it's what it taught you to believe about yourself. In this episode, Valerie sits down with Breanna —a Navy veteran, suicide prevention specialist, and moral injury specialist with Volunteers of America—for a conversation about the wounds too many veterans carry in silence and the paths that can lead them home to themselves. We explore Military Sexual Trauma (MST) as a betrayal-based trauma and the layers that often accompany it: distrust, isolation, hypervigilance, shame, and a reshaped sense of identity. Breanna breaks down moral injury in a way that is both accessible and profound, offering a distinction that lands deeply: PTSD often says, "I'm not safe." Moral injury often says, "I'm not worthy." Together, we discuss the difference between treating symptoms and tending to the deeper wounds of meaning, values, and belonging. Breanna shares her own experience with suicidal ideation, the courage it took to call 988, and what she now looks for when someone begins to reconnect with themselves: choice, agency, hope, and a nervous system that finally exhales. We also talk about boundaries, self-care for helpers, movement, community, and why presence—not fixing—is often the most powerful medicine we can offer another human being. This is a conversation about healing, but also about witnessing. About telling the truth. About what becomes possible when we no longer carry our stories alone. If this episode resonates with you, consider sharing it with someone who may need it. And if you're enjoying these conversations, subscribing and leaving a review helps these stories reach the people who need them most. Contact Valerie [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/support] Remember YOU are loved and worthy of being witnessed! If today’s episode stirred heavy feelings, you are not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional if you need support: * National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) | rainn.org [https://www.rainn.org/] * SAMHSA Mental Health/Substance Use: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) * 988 LIFELINE: Call, Text or Chat https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org] * Veterans Crisis Line: Dial or text 988, then press 1 * Help for Veterans suffering with CPTSD https://saveawarrior.org/ [https://saveawarrior.org/] * https://www.scarsfoundation.org/ [https://www.scarsfoundation.org/] *This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911 or your local emergency number. Want to tell your story? Send a DM or an email Find us on IG @defiance_of_silence_podcast    valerie@defianceofsilencepodcast.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr]

Valerie - What Stayed: Season Two Reflections

In this solo reflection, Valerie looks back on the conversations that shaped Season 2 and the themes that kept surfacing beneath the stories: grief, survival, caregiving, moral injury, nervous system healing, and the quiet weight so many people carry while appearing strong on the outside. Together, we explore the losses we were taught to outrun—safety, identity, relationships, expectations, and the versions of ourselves we created just to survive. We examine the helper patterns our culture rewards and what happens when the body finally sends an invoice through insomnia, panic, chronic pain, exhaustion, numbness, or disconnection. Drawing from conversations from this season's guests, Valerie reflects on the power of being believed, why healing rarely happens in isolation, and what it means to stop abandoning ourselves long enough to tell the truth. This episode is also a bridge into Season 3, where the focus widens beyond trauma itself and into the humanity beneath the roles we play—the field of human stories all around us.  Special thank you our special guest from this season - it means so much that you would share your hearts with us and help us grow in love and community. If this space has meant something to you, thank you for being part of it. Thank you for witnessing these stories, and for helping defy the silence that keeps people isolated and alone.  See you in Season 3 - The Field of Human Stories Contact Valerie [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/support] Remember YOU are loved and worthy of being witnessed! If today’s episode stirred heavy feelings, you are not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional if you need support: * National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) | rainn.org [https://www.rainn.org/] * SAMHSA Mental Health/Substance Use: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) * 988 LIFELINE: Call, Text or Chat https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org] * Veterans Crisis Line: Dial or text 988, then press 1 * Help for Veterans suffering with CPTSD https://saveawarrior.org/ [https://saveawarrior.org/] * https://www.scarsfoundation.org/ [https://www.scarsfoundation.org/] *This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911 or your local emergency number. Want to tell your story? Send a DM or an email Find us on IG @defiance_of_silence_podcast    valerie@defianceofsilencepodcast.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr]

Kim - When Healers Need Healing

People trained to save everyone else rarely get asked a simple question: Where do you put your own pain? In this season finale, Valerie sits down with Kim —known to many as Captain Kim—a U.S. Army Veteran, former combat medic and emergency room nurse, and founder of the Reveille & Retreat Project. Kim’s path to leadership wasn’t linear. It was shaped by childhood adversity, military service, years on the front lines of trauma care, and raising a child as a single mother. Like so many who live in constant readiness, she learned how to function, perform, and push through—until her body no longer allowed it. When foot surgery forced her to slow down, everything she had outrun caught up. Memories from the ER. Nightmares. Survival patterns that no longer worked. In this conversation, we talk honestly about what happens when a life built on resilience meets the reality of unresolved trauma. From childhood experiences like divorce and lack of emotional attunement, to the way blame turns inward when we’re trying to make sense of it all—Kim shares what it looked like to move from living in fight-or-flight to something steadier and more sustainable. You’ll hear real, practical tools for nervous system regulation—and what it actually takes to move beyond white-knuckling your way through life. We also go deeper into Kim’s work today. Through the Reveille & Retreat Project, she creates healing retreats where military women can step out of performance and into truth—using nature, movement, and shared storytelling as pathways back to connection. She shares what makes a space truly safe, why the outdoors can support trauma healing, and how community only works when it includes boundaries and the right people. Kim is also the co-founder and host of the Dog Tag Diaries, where women veterans have honest conversations about service, identity, moral injury, grief, and life beyond the uniform. Because the stories we once survived… often become the ones that help others heal. Listen to Dog Tag Diaries here - https://dogtagdiaries.captivate.fm/ [https://dogtagdiaries.captivate.fm/] Contact Valerie [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/support] Remember YOU are loved and worthy of being witnessed! If today’s episode stirred heavy feelings, you are not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional if you need support: * National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) | rainn.org [https://www.rainn.org/] * SAMHSA Mental Health/Substance Use: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) * 988 LIFELINE: Call, Text or Chat https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org] * Veterans Crisis Line: Dial or text 988, then press 1 * Help for Veterans suffering with CPTSD https://saveawarrior.org/ [https://saveawarrior.org/] * https://www.scarsfoundation.org/ [https://www.scarsfoundation.org/] *This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911 or your local emergency number. Want to tell your story? Send a DM or an email Find us on IG @defiance_of_silence_podcast    valerie@defianceofsilencepodcast.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr]

Lisa - Not in Crisis Enough

Four months for an appointment can feel like a door slamming the moment you finally admit you need help. In this episode, we sit down with Lisa—a licensed clinical social worker, Army veteran, and trauma survivor—to talk about what breaks in the mental health system, and what it could look like if care actually met people where they are. If you’ve ever been told you don’t have the right insurance, you’re not in enough crisis, or you just need to fill out one more form… this conversation is for you. Lisa shares the vision behind the Wellness Collaborative, a nonprofit growing out of Peaceful Waters Retreat Center in LaGrange, Texas. Her approach is different: trauma-informed care in a park-like setting that supports the whole person—counseling alongside nervous system regulation, movement, yoga, nutrition, and other holistic modalities. We talk about why place matters in healing, how diagnosis-driven systems can miss the human in front of them, and what it could look like to expand access in rural communities through visiting providers, interns, and volunteers. And we go there, personally. Assault. Iraq. Grief. And the way anger can become the only emotion that feels survivable. Lisa shares what helps over time, what real self-care looks like for those who are always the helper, and tools like Alpha-Stim and VA virtual reality therapy that some people have found helpful for anxiety and sleep. If you’re trying to get help, have been turned away, or are supporting someone who is—this conversation offers perspective, possibility, and a reminder that the system may be broken, but healing is still available. Contact Valerie [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/support] Remember YOU are loved and worthy of being witnessed! If today’s episode stirred heavy feelings, you are not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional if you need support: * National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) | rainn.org [https://www.rainn.org/] * SAMHSA Mental Health/Substance Use: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) * 988 LIFELINE: Call, Text or Chat https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org] * Veterans Crisis Line: Dial or text 988, then press 1 * Help for Veterans suffering with CPTSD https://saveawarrior.org/ [https://saveawarrior.org/] * https://www.scarsfoundation.org/ [https://www.scarsfoundation.org/] *This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911 or your local emergency number. Want to tell your story? Send a DM or an email Find us on IG @defiance_of_silence_podcast    valerie@defianceofsilencepodcast.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr]

Traci - The Call No Parent Wants

The phone rings at 6:30am. You don’t recognize the number. Minutes later, everything changes. In this episode Traci takes us inside the day her 19-year-old son Trent suffered sudden cardiac arrest during a Navy fitness assessment—and the decade that followed. What began as shock became a long, unrelenting journey through ICU decisions, anoxic brain injury rehabilitation, and the invisible labor of caregiving that few people truly understand. This is not a story about a moment.  It’s about the long after. We talk about what caregiver burnout actually looks like when it’s not reduced to a buzzword: Sleeping in 15-minute fragments, forgetting to eat, living in a constant state of fight-or-flight, and carrying the quiet fear of what happens if you let yourself rest. Traci shares the weight of being asked to sign a DNR, the confusion of navigating medical systems that often misunderstand anoxic brain injury, and the hard-earned skill of becoming an advocate—inside both civilian hospitals and the VA. We also name what often goes unseen: The ripple effect of trauma on others, including the classmates who witnessed Trent’s collapse, CPR, and defibrillation—and were left without closure. And still, hope finds its way in. Through adaptive sports, brain injury clubhouse community, equine connection at Henry’s Home, and the slow, honest rebuilding of identity when “caregiver” becomes your whole world—until it can’t be the only thing anymore. If you’re caring for someone you love—whether you’re just beginning, deep in it, or somewhere you can finally look back—this conversation offers language, validation, and options. One clear truth remains:   You don’t have to do this alone. Ask for help. Let people show up. Contact Valerie [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/support] Remember YOU are loved and worthy of being witnessed! If today’s episode stirred heavy feelings, you are not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional if you need support: * National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) | rainn.org [https://www.rainn.org/] * SAMHSA Mental Health/Substance Use: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) * 988 LIFELINE: Call, Text or Chat https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org] * Veterans Crisis Line: Dial or text 988, then press 1 * Help for Veterans suffering with CPTSD https://saveawarrior.org/ [https://saveawarrior.org/] * https://www.scarsfoundation.org/ [https://www.scarsfoundation.org/] *This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911 or your local emergency number. Want to tell your story? Send a DM or an email Find us on IG @defiance_of_silence_podcast    valerie@defianceofsilencepodcast.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr]