Feelings...and Other Inconveniences

19. Am I Just Lazy or Is Everyone Else Lying?

In this episode, we talk about that very normal, very annoying experience of looking at someone else and thinking, How are they doing all of that? Sarah thinks of people juggling parenting, careers, caregiving, YouTube, groups, books, and actual life admin. Stefanie thinks less about quantity and more about quality, like the people who seem to have the team, the polish, the systems, and the professional course suite. So we get into what comparison is actually poking at: capacity, overwhelm, uncertainty, caregiving, business pressure, self-judgment, and the fear that everyone else is somehow moving forward while you are still trying to answer one email from the book cover designer. Sarah talks about caring for her dad while he's very unwell, the anticipatory grief of not knowing what comes next, and the strange guilt of finding something hard when you can imagine someone else having it harder. Stefanie talks about the difference between what people see online and what they don't see: the areas where work feels alive and energizing, and the other areas of life where the wheels are maybe not exactly spinning gracefully. We also discuss why frustration can sometimes feel preferable to fear or despair, how comparison fills in the blanks of other people's lives, and why someone else's strengths are not separate from the rest of their actual life. A conversation about capacity, comparison, caregiving, business, burnout, admin dread, hidden deficits, visible strengths, and the exhausting little fantasy that everyone else has somehow been issued more spoons and a better working relationship with productivity. STEF LINKS: Emails [https://www.iamstefaniemichele.com/wednesdays] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/iamstefaniemichele] YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@iamstefaniemichele] Substack [https://substack.com/@iamstefaniemichele] SARAH LINKS: Blog [https://thebingeeatingtherapist.com/blog/] YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@TheBingeEatingTherapist] Groups [https://thebingeeatingtherapist.com/connect-and-recover-groups/]

18. Who Are You Without the Struggle?

This episode is about why familiar suffering can sometimes feel safer than relief. We talk about how long-term struggles can become tied to identity, safety, meaning, avoidance, legitimacy, and the hope that someone will finally notice how much pain you're in. Through the lens of eating disorder recovery, depression, anxiety, body image, and the fantasy of rescue, we explore why letting go of suffering can feel less like instant freedom and more like losing a familiar place to go. We also talk about the difference between pain and suffering, why the nervous system returns to old pathways, and what it can mean to build more choice when struggle has been part of your sense of self for a long time. STEF LINKS: Emails [https://www.iamstefaniemichele.com/wednesdays] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/iamstefaniemichele] YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@iamstefaniemichele] Substack [https://substack.com/@iamstefaniemichele] SARAH LINKS: Blog [https://thebingeeatingtherapist.com/blog/] YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@TheBingeEatingTherapist] Groups [https://thebingeeatingtherapist.com/connect-and-recover-groups/]

17. Do You Want to Be Seen (But Also Want to Hide)?

Why do we want to be seen… and also feel the urge to hide? In this episode of Feelings and Other Inconveniences, we unpack the psychology of being seen — from social media and identity curation to the deeper fear of judgment, rejection, and being misunderstood. We explore: * the difference between being seen vs being looked at * how fear of judgment and rejection shapes what we share * the pressure of social media, visibility, and validation * why being accurately understood matters more than just being visible * how people-pleasing, comparison, and identity influence how much space we take up * the vulnerability of putting yourself out there (including writing a book and public exposure) This conversation gets into the real tension between visibility and safety — and why even confident, self-aware people still wrestle with it. If you've ever overthought a post, held yourself back in a conversation, or worried about how you're being perceived, this episode is for you. Not sure what to write? You can literally just copy and paste this: BEST PODCAST EVER — A UNIQUE REVIEW We won't argue with you. More About Stefanie Michele: * Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/iamstefaniemichele] * Substack [https://www.substack.com/@iamstefaniemichele] * Website [https://www.iamstefaniemichele.com] * Full But Not Finished on YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@iamstefaniemichele] More About Sarah Dosanjh: YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/c/TheBingeEatingTherapist] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/the_binge_eating_therapist] Website [https://www.thebingeeatingtherapist.com] Book: I Can't Stop Eating [https://thebingeeatingtherapist.com/book/]

16. Why Don't I Do What I Say I'll Do?!

In this episode, Stefanie Michele and Sarah Dosanjh dig into a familiar problem: why we don't do the things we know help us. Using real-life examples (walks, movement, scheduling, tiny "extra steps" that somehow feel huge), they unpack how mental load, environment cues, and internal parts create resistance. They explore the difference between shame-driven self-talk and real self-compassion, how validating resistance can loosen it, and when "understanding why" is the turning point. Expect practical takeaways, parts-work insight, and a refreshingly human conversation about motivation, inertia, and follow-through. Leave us a rating and review on your favorite podcast platform — it helps more than you'd think (and yes, we actually read them). Not sure what to write? You can literally just copy and paste this: BEST PODCAST EVER — A UNIQUE REVIEW We won't argue with you. More About Stefanie Michele: * Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/iamstefaniemichele] * Substack [https://www.substack.com/@iamstefaniemichele] * Website [https://www.iamstefaniemichele.com] * Full But Not Finished on YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@iamstefaniemichele] More About Sarah Dosanjh: YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/c/TheBingeEatingTherapist] Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/the_binge_eating_therapist] Website [https://www.thebingeeatingtherapist.com] Book: I Can't Stop Eating [https://thebingeeatingtherapist.com/book/]

15. The World Is On Fire (and your nervous system knows it)

In this episode of Feelings… and Other Inconveniences, Stefanie Michele (certified coach + somatic practitioner) and Sarah Dosanjh (psychotherapist + author) unpack what it means to stay emotionally sane when the world feels like it's on fire. We talk about the tightrope between staying informed and getting emotionally flooded (or going numb), why social media comments can feel more destabilising than the headlines, and how two people can watch the same thing and walk away with entirely different realities (hello, "the dress" — but with much higher stakes). We also explore how values, identity, and nervous system states shape what we perceive as "truth", and why a calm response to an un-calm situation isn't always the goal. Most importantly: we get practical. If you've been trying to "think your way out" of stress, we'll share nervous-system-friendly ways to discharge what your body is holding. If you're feeling overwhelmed, helpless, furious, frozen, guilty for switching off, guilty for staying tuned in… you're not alone. Leave us a rating and review on your favorite podcast platform — it helps more than you'd think (and yes, we actually read them). Not sure what to write? You can literally just copy and paste this: BEST PODCAST EVER — A UNIQUE REVIEW We won't argue with you. More About Stefanie Michele: * Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/iamstefaniemichele] * Substack [https://www.substack.com/@iamstefaniemichele] * Website [https://www.iamstefaniemichele.com] * Full But Not Finished on YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@iamstefaniemichele] More About Sarah Dosanjh: * * YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/c/TheBingeEatingTherapist] * Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/the_binge_eating_therapist] * Website [https://www.thebingeeatingtherapist.com] * Book: I Can't Stop Eating [https://thebingeeatingtherapist.com/book/]