Keeping it Real with Zulma The Swearing Therapist Podcast

Six Months Later: The Hardest and Best Decision I Ever Made

Six months ago, I packed up my life and moved to Panama. Has it been easy? Not even close. There have been frustrations, adjustments, moments of doubt, and plenty of "what the fuck was I thinking?" days. Moving to another country is a lot harder than the highlight reels on social media would have you believe. But while Las Vegas is hitting triple-digit temperatures, I am living by the ocean. I can hear the waves, walk to the beach, and jump into the water whenever I want. The life I spent years dreaming about is now my everyday reality. In this episode, I reflect on what I have learned during these first six months and why I would rather struggle building a life I love than stay comfortable in a life that was making me miserable. Sometimes the best decisions are the ones that scare the shit out of you... and turn out to be the best fucking thing you have ever done.

Question Everything: Just Because It Is "Normal" Does Not Mean It Makes Sense

I went for a dental cleaning in Panama and paid $31. That is it. No mandatory X-rays. No required appointment with a dentist first (I chose this option, so I paid a total of $52). No endless upselling. No jumping through a bunch of hoops that somehow became "normal". Coming from the U.S., where it often feels like every healthcare visit comes with extra steps, extra appointments, and extra charges, it made me stop and ask: Who decided this was the only way to do things? That question did not stop at the dentist's office. Over the last few weeks, I have stopped every single non-essential commitment in my life. Every project, obligation, challenge, and distraction got put under the microscope. Why am I doing this? Do I actually want this? Is this moving me toward my goals, or am I just doing it because I have always done it? Sometimes growth is not adding more shit to your plate. Sometimes it is having the guts to clear the fucking plate entirely and put back only what truly matters. This episode is about questioning assumptions, cutting the bullshit, and becoming ruthless about where you spend your time, money, and energy. Because if you are not choosing your priorities intentionally, life will choose them for you. And trust me... that is a hell of a lot more expensive than a $52 dental appointment.

You Are Allowed to Change Your Mind

Can we stop acting like saying yes means you are stuck forever? You are allowed to change your fucking mind. I committed to these year-long challenges thinking I could handle it all, and then reality hit. I realized I do not have the time, energy, or bandwidth for them right now, so I postponed them. And honestly? That is healthier than forcing myself into burnout just to prove I am “committed.” Too many people keep doing shit that no longer works simply because they do not want to disappoint others or rock the boat. That is not commitment... that is self-abandonment. In this episode, we are talking about guilt, growth, boundaries, and why reassessing your capacity is not weakness. You are allowed to pivot. You are allowed to outgrow things. And you are absolutely allowed to say, “Fuck it, this no longer works for me.”

When the Wrong Investment Leads You to the Right People

I invested a lot of money into a program that honestly did not deliver at the level of the investment. I felt frustrated, disappointed, and questioning myself. And to be fucking real, part of me wanted to stay stuck in that anger. But then something unexpected happened. Because of that experience, I found another program in Panama, and through it, I met incredible people. Real connections. Organic relationships built around a genuine shared interest, not forced networking or pretending to fit in. The kind of connections that remind you why you started in the first place. This episode is about perspective. About the moments in life where you can either stay bitter and paralyzed by what did not work out… or decide to shift your focus and ask: What can I do with this now? Sometimes the first door disappoints you so the right one can open. Sometimes the lesson is not in the loss, it is in what the loss leads you to. And maybe not every investment pays you back in the way you expected. Some pay you back in clarity, people, growth, and redirection.

Is This Self-Sabotage… or Self-Respect?

Let’s talk about that uncomfortable gray area: when you say no to something that looks like a great opportunity… is that self-sabotage, or are you finally honoring yourself? In this episode, I am getting real about investing a lot of money into a program that did not meet my expectations... and then being faced with another opportunity that stirred up doubt. Not just because of the financial commitment, but because of something deeper: the fear of receiving, especially when you are used to being the one who gives. Is hesitation always fear? Or is it discernment? Is saying no a pattern of self-sabotage... or a boundary? We are unpacking the internal conflict between growth and protection, scarcity and trust, giving and receiving. Because sometimes what looks like self-sabotage is actually your intuition asking you to pause. And other times… it is fear dressed up as logic. The real question is not just “should I say yes?” It is “what is driving my no?”