Tools for Marriage

E18 - Trevor's Parents' Story and Letting the Lord Lead

E18 - Trevor's Parents' Story and Letting the Lord Lead | Tools for MarriageIn this heartfelt episode of Tools for Marriage, Trevor and Laura sit down with Trevor’s parents, Brent and Darene, to hear the stories, lessons, and hard-won wisdom that come from 59 years of marriage. From a honeymoon that cost just $6 to building a life marked by faith, family, perseverance, and love, this conversation is full of humor, honesty, and timeless encouragement.They talk about learning to navigate life as opposites, how to handle money without letting it divide your marriage, why loving your spouse well is one of the greatest gifts you can give your children, and how commitment carries a couple through both joyful and difficult seasons. They also share stories from raising their family, career moves, and the faith that shaped their journey together.Whether you’re newly married, preparing for marriage, or decades in, this episode offers practical wisdom and a beautiful reminder that love is not just a feeling — it’s a decision, lived out over time.Chapters:(0:00) Welcome to Tools for Marriage + Meet Brent & Darene(1:33) Opposites in Marriage: Adventure vs. A Plan(2:59) The $6 Honeymoon Story(6:15) The 25th Anniversary Surprise Recreated(16:13) Marriage Advice: Love Is a Decision(18:03) Handling Money Without Letting It Divide You(22:26) Best Thing for Kids: Love Their Mother(26:22) Raising Three Boys and Family Life Stories(29:09) Brent’s Engineering Career and the Move to Pennsylvania(51:06) Faith Journey, Moving to Salt Lake, Gideons, and LegacyShow notes:The Gideons International: https://gideons.org/

E17 - Looking Back (Season 1), Looking Forward (Season 2)

Season 2 Episode 17: Looking Back (Season 1), Looking Forward (Season 2) | Tools for Marriage Tools for Marriage: https://toolsformarriage.com Are you looking for practical ways to build a stronger, more resilient marriage? Join Trevor and Laura in this special transition episode of the Tools for Marriage podcast as they celebrate the wrap-up of Season 1 and share an exciting look ahead at Season 2! In this episode, we reflect on the "master class" of wisdom shared by our incredible Season 1 guests—from first responders and ministry leaders to marriage authors. We dive into the most impactful "tools" we’ve learned so far. Whether you are on the cusp of marriage or have been together for decades, these tangible, Christ-centered tools are designed to help your relationship flourish. Stick around until the end to hear what’s coming in Season 2 as we continue our mission to provide the skills every couple needs but few are taught. What you’ll learn in this video: ✅ Why we started the Tools for Marriage podcast. ✅ The concept of "Radical Obedience" in a relationship. ✅ Highlights from our most popular Season 1 interviews. ✅ A sneak peek at the topics and guests coming in Season 2! Subscribe for more practical marriage tools and hit the notification bell so you never miss an episode of Season 2! Chapters: (0:00:00) - Introduction to Season 2 (0:01:04) - The Accidental Podcast: How It All Began (0:02:25) - The Technical Learning Curve and Home Studio Challenges (0:04:05) - The Mission: Reaching Beyond One-on-One Counseling (0:05:27) - Radical Obedience and Choosing Yearly Words (0:07:23) - The Philosophy Behind "Tools for Marriage" (0:08:45) - Learning in Reverse: Avoiding Relationship Potholes (0:09:49) - Communication Trap: The Myth of Mind Reading (Episode 1 - Trevor & Laura Black) (0:10:47) - Defining Your Terms and Avoiding Assumptions (0:12:37) - Intentional Connection: Couch Time and Walk-and-Talks (0:14:11) - Supporting First Responder Marriages (Episode 2 - Mark & Annette Manley) (0:16:42) - Personality Assessments and Ministry (Episode 5 - Brian & Linda Seitz) (0:18:39) - The Power of the Tongue & Developing Curiosity (Episode 8 - Trevor & Laura Black) (0:20:59) - Loving One Another Well & The “F” Word (Feelings), Feelings Wheel (Episode 4 - Kelly DuPée) (0:24:01) - Fix vs. Listen & The Love Languages (Episode 6 - DC and Cookie Currier) (0:26:44) - The 1st year of marriage & Premarital Counseling (Episode 7 - Max & McKenzie Walls) (0:29:01) - Bucket List & Savor and Gratitude & How They Met (Episode 9 - Ron & Nancy Anderson - Part 1) (0:30:22) - Restoration or Reconciliation from Infidelity (Episode 10 - Ron & Nancy Anderson - Part 2) (0:32:55) - Meeting comedian Robert G. Lee on set (Episode 11 - Robert G & Anne Lee) (0:35:06) - Prayer & Following the Holy Spirit (Episode 12 - Keith & Megan Peeler) (0:36:45) - In Sickness and In Health (Episode 13 - Chris & Sheryl Solberg) (0:38:10) - Peregrine & Lasagna Love (Episode 14 - Craig & Beryl Glass) (0:39:40) - Humility and Reconciliation (Episode 15 - Eric Heard) (0:42:00) - How We Love & Counseling (Episode 16 - Bagwell) (0:43:26) - Sneak Peek: What to Expect in Season 2 (0:44:43) - Closing Thoughts and Community Connection #marriageadvice #RelationshipTools #ToolsForMarriage #ChristianMarriage #CommunicationSkills #MarriagePodcast #Season2Launch #strongertogether

E16 - Darren Bagwell Marriage & Family Therapist Shares Insights on a Strong and Healthy Marriage

Episode 16 - Darren Bagwell Marriage & Family Therapist Shares Insights on a Strong and Healthy Marriage | Tools for Marriage Join us for an insightful conversation with licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Darren Bagwell, as he shares his personal journey and professional wisdom on healing attachment wounds and moving toward secure connection in marriage. Darren unveils the critical role of your "Attachment Imprint," explaining why the high-achieving "Golden Child" identity often fails in partnership, and how the Anxious Pleaser pattern emerges. You’ll learn tangible, compassionate steps to integrate your Inner Child, utilize the Comfort Circle for safety and attunement, and embrace the 3 R's framework (Recover, Repair, and Reconnect) to transform conflict into deeper intimacy. This episode is a must-listen for any couple ready to stop managing surface-level conflict and start building a marriage defined by lasting security and heartfelt understanding. Chapters: (0:00:00) Welcome & Meet Darren Bagwell: Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (0:01:06) From Sociology to Diamond Sales: The Winding Path to MFT (0:05:09) The Pivot to Counseling: Grad School, MFT, and the EMDR Approach (0:07:10) Trauma is What Happens Inside: The Origin of the "Attachment Imprint" (0:11:10) The Anxious Pleaser & Discovering the How We Love Model (0:15:35) When the "Golden Child" Breaks: Marital Crisis and the Wounds from Childhood (0:21:26) The Inner Child: Why Understanding Your Past is Key to Your Present (0:33:40) The Comfort Circle: A Tool for Safety, Attunement, and Secure Connection (0:42:00) Humility & Ownership: The Two Keys to Moving Through Marital Crisis (0:47:00) Advice for Newlyweds: Marriage as a Process of "Becoming" (0:54:30) The 3 R's Framework: Recover, Repair, and Reconnect Show Notes: Darren Bagwell - https://www.darrenbagwell.com/ Reunion Counseling - https://www.reunioncounseling.com/ The Formation Agency - https://theformationagency.com/ How We Love - https://howwelove.com Tools for Marriage - https://toolsformarriage.com About Darren Bagwell: Darren is passionate about helping you navigate through the complexities of life in order to find the best solution available. Darren has clinical experience working with anxiety, depression, divorce complications, co-parenting, adjustment issues, addiction, trauma, and relational conflict. He enjoys working with individuals that feel stuck or struggling to find their path as well as couples, families and young adults. Darren Bagwell , M.A., LMFT Marriage & Family Counselor https://www.darrenbagwell.com/ 949.274.3816 Darren@relationship180.com 26131 Marguerite Parkway, Suite A Mission Viejo, CA 92692

E15 - 1,358 Weddings, 18 Re-Marriages, and Truths to Transform Your Marriage with Pastor Eric Heard

Episode 15 - 1,358 Weddings, 18 Re-Marriages, and Truths to Transform Your Marriage with Pastor Eric Heard | Tools for Marriage Description: In this powerful episode of Tools for Marriage, Trevor and Laura sit down with Pastor Eric Heard - a man who has spent over 50 years helping couples prepare, repair, and completely restore their marriages. With more than 1,358 weddings, 18 reconciled remarriages, and decades of working with marriages in crisis, Eric brings wisdom forged through personal pain, biblical truth, and years of pastoral experience. Eric shares openly about his own story of abuse, separation, repentance, and miraculous restoration - and explains the practical tools every couple must master: conflict resolution, emotional connection, protecting covenant, dealing with bitterness, and understanding the spiritual battle behind relational division. Whether you're preparing for marriage, fighting for your marriage, or supporting others in theirs, this episode is filled with transformational insight, humor, authenticity, and real hope. Chapters: (00:00) – Welcome & Introductions Trevor and Laura introduce Pastor Eric Heard and set the stage for the conversation.(01:06) – Eric’s Story: Conversion, Calling & 51 Years of Ministry How Eric came to Christ at 18 and began his journey into pastoral ministry. (03:56) – 1,358 Weddings & a Lifelong Commitment to Couples Eric discusses performing weddings, premarital counseling, and why he uses old-school folders. (05:21) – The Beauty of Reconciliation & 18 Re-Marriages Stories of couples who divorced and later rebuilt their marriage from scratch. (15:10) – Growing Up in Abuse & How Trauma Follows You Into Marriage Eric opens up about childhood abuse, normalized dysfunction, and its impact on early marriage. (21:24) – The Turning Point: Separation, Confession & God Changing His Heart The moment Eric realized his anger and abuse were destroying his marriage — and what he did to change. (37:13) – The Four Cornerstones of Marriage: Permanence, Oneness, Nakedness & Intimacy Eric breaks down the biblical foundation that shapes every healthy marriage. (43:02) – Conflict Resolution Tools That Actually Work The Disneyland Autotopia analogy, mirroring, and why most couples never learned these skills. (48:06) – Teaching Men to Feel & Women to Use Fewer Words Eric explains the feeling wheel, gender differences, and how to communicate more effectively. (56:06) – Protecting the Covenant: Guardrails Against Betrayal Practical boundaries, transparency, and the importance of safeguarding the marriage relationship. Show Notes: Standing Stone Ministry - https://standingstoneministry.org Mariners Church - https://marinerschurch.org How We Love - https://howwelove.com SYMBIS - https://symbis.com Relationship Lifeline - https://relationshiplifeline.org Tools for Marriage - https://toolsformarriage.com @ToolsForMarriage  [https://studio.youtube.com/channel/UCHy_m07QtBWgxuqFGJi9ksQ]

E14 - Smuggling Bibles, Feeding Souls, & Building Legacies — Craig & Beryl Glass

EPISODE 14 - SMUGGLING BIBLES, FEEDING SOULS, & BUILDING LEGACIES — CRAIG & BERYL GLASS | TOOLS FOR MARRIAGE In this inspiring episode of Tools for Marriage, Trevor and Laura reconnect with Craig and Beryl Glass — a couple whose marriage has been shaped by faith, courage, and a lifetime of service. From smuggling Bibles behind the Iron Curtain to leading men’s ministries and delivering meals through Lasagna Love, their story is a powerful reminder that marriage is both an adventure and a ministry. Listen as they share lessons learned from 49 years together, the importance of compassion and courage in godly manhood, and how small acts of love can ripple across generations. CHAPTERS: 1. (00:00) Introduction and Reconnection 2. (02:05) The Journey of Craig and Beryl Glass 3. (05:09) Early Years of Marriage 4. (08:12) Missionary Adventures in Europe 5. (11:03) The Risks of Bible Smuggling 6. (14:13) Stories from the Field 7. (17:11) The Lasagna Love Initiative 8. (20:04) Peregrine Ministries and Its Mission 9. (23:10) Father-Son Retreats and Their Impact 10. (35:01) The Journey to Manhood 11. (37:58) Creating a Passage to Manhood 12. (40:58) The Blessing Ceremony 13. (43:38) Core Qualities of Masculinity 14. (46:43) The Importance of Fathers 15. (49:37) Advice for Couples 16. (52:32) Navigating Differences in Marriage 17. (56:35) Faith and Ministry Together 18. (59:11) The Impact of Small Acts 19. (01:03:53) You Matter: A Message to Men SHOW NOTES: Peregrine Ministries - https://peregrineministries.org/ [https://peregrineministries.org/] Lasagna Love - https://lasagnalove.org/ [https://lasagnalove.org/] Tools for Marriage - https://toolsformarriage.com/ [https://toolsformarriage.com/]