What You Took Back Podcast

Episode.20 "I Said no Then Apologised For it."

I'm Skye. And this is What You Took Back. A podcast for women who've spent years surviving on fragments of themselves. I'm here to hand you back the whole damn thing. I said no. Then, before anyone could even react, I heard myself apologising for it. Nothing bad happened. Nobody was hurt. I just held a boundary — and some old, exhausted part of me still felt like I owed someone a "sorry" for it. This is Part 3 of the July series — Boundaries, People-Pleasing, Guilt, Self-Trust. Boundaries was the door. People-pleasing was why it stayed open. This episode is the toll booth that charges you every time you try to walk through anyway: guilt. Here's the truth nobody tells you when they hand you a boundary script — guilt doesn't disappear once you learn the skill. If you're a recovering people-pleaser, guilt isn't a sign you did the boundary wrong. It's the toll you pay for doing it right, at least for a while. In this episode: * Why guilt shows up even when, on paper, you did absolutely nothing wrong * The reframe that changes everything — guilt as a doorbell, not a verdict * A realistic timeline for how long this actually takes to get easier Take the free Power Leak Checklist at whatyoutookback.com/power-leak-check-list-sign-up to find out where your own guilt tends to load in. What have you taken back? 🎙️   www.whatyoutookback.com

Episode. 19 'The Most Exhausting Job You Never Applied For.'

I'm Skye. And this is What You Took Back. A podcast for women who've spent years surviving on fragments of themselves. I'm here to hand you back the whole damn thing. Someone tells you, "Honestly, you're just so easy to work with." You smile. You say thank you. Inside, some tiny, exhausted part of you goes, oh no — because you know what that sentence actually means once you translate it. You've never made this person manage your feelings, negotiate with your limits, or wait for you to think about what you actually want. You made yourself frictionless. And frictionless people don't get protected. They get relied on. This is Part 2 of the July series — Boundaries, People-Pleasing, Guilt, Self-Trust — and this episode goes straight at the mechanism underneath every collapsed boundary from last week: people-pleasing. Not the dictionary version. The real one. It's not about wanting to be liked. It's about a nervous system that decided, a long time ago, that being needed was safer than being known. In this episode: * Why "just say no more" has never worked on anyone, ever * The tiny question that gives the whole game away — pizza or Thai, this or that — and why your honest answer might be static * Four small, deliberately uncomfortable reps to start rebuilding a preference this week Take the free Power Leak Checklist at whatyoutookback.com/power-leak-check-list-sign-up and find out exactly where yours started. What have you taken back? 🎙️

Episode. 18 "The boundary You Keep Explaining Isn't a Boundary."

Picture your family or friend group chat. Someone's asked you to host Christmas again — same as every year — and for the first time, you type the word "no." Then you delete it. You write it again, this time with a paragraph attached: how tired you've been, the kids' schedule, a "maybe next year" so nobody feels rejected. That's not a boundary. That's a boundary wearing a disguise so it can sneak past everyone's disappointment without anyone noticing. This is Part 1 of a four-part July series — Boundaries, People-Pleasing, Guilt, Self-Trust — and this episode is about the tell that gives away a fake boundary every time: the length of the explanation. A real boundary is a sentence. The kind most of us were taught to build is a paragraph. In this episode: * Why over-explaining a "no" isn't politeness — it's a Power Leak * The one question to ask before you speak: are you informing someone of a decision, or applying for their permission * Three phrases to practise this week that hold a boundary without writing a legal brief to defend it If this one hits close to home, take the free Power Leak Checklist at whatyoutookback.com/power-leak-check-list-sign-up — it'll show you exactly where your energy is leaking before you even get to the boundary conversation. What have you taken back? 🎙️

Episode.17 "Nobody checks on the strong one."

Someone decided you were the strong one. Nobody asked your permission. And somewhere along the way, it became the only thing you were allowed to be. This episode is for the woman underneath the strength — the one who has held everyone else together and never once been the person someone rushed to check on. It's time to talk about what that costs. You became the ceiling that holds everything up. And ceilings don't get to have bad days. They don't get to sit on the kitchen floor at 10pm and just not be okay for a minute. They don't get to say I'm struggling. Because if the ceiling comes down, everything underneath it does too. This is the episode for the strong one. The one who nursed people through illness. Who held families together through things that would have broken most people. Who went through her own heartbreak, her own losses, her own falling apart — and handled it, because that's what you do. And not one person asked if she was okay. In this episode, I talk about how the strong one role gets assigned without your consent and hardens over time, the quiet, unspoken fear that keeps the people around you from ever asking — if she's broken, what happens to all of us? — the grief that lives underneath the strength, and the permission you were never given but always deserved. This episode won't give you a five-step strategy. It'll give you something simpler. The strongest thing you will ever do is let someone in. 🔗 Download the free Power Leak Checklist — start identifying where your energy, confidence and sense of self have been quietly leaking away. 👉 whatyoutookback.com/checklist

Episode. 16 "The mental load nobody see's because you make it look easy."

Episode 17 — "She Was Always the Strong One. Nobody Checked on Her." Everyone decided you were the strong one. Not because you asked for it. Not because anyone sat down and voted. But because when things fell apart, you stayed steady. When there was a crisis, you handled it. When everyone else needed holding — you held them. And because you did it so well, so consistently, so quietly — nobody thought to ask if you were okay. Not because they didn't care. Because they genuinely couldn't imagine that you needed it. This episode is about the hidden cost of being the strong one. Not the exhaustion — you know about that already. The deeper cost. The grief of never being the one who got to fall apart. The loneliness of competence. The slow erosion of the woman underneath the role. And the boundary nobody ever talks about — the one that was set for you without your permission. The boundary around your own vulnerability. This month we're taking our power back. And this week, that starts with something quieter than a boundary conversation or a hard no. It starts with the permission to not be strong. Just for a minute. Just for today. In this episode: — How the strong one label gets built — and why it sets like concrete — What it actually costs you to make it look easy — The boundary around your vulnerability that was never yours to set — Why unfelt feelings don't disappear — they just go underground — The grief of being the woman nobody thought to check on — Permission to not be okay — and what that actually looks like Grab the free Power Leak Checklist: whatyoutookback.com/checklist If nobody has checked on you lately — consider this your check-in. I see you. And you are allowed to put it down.