In Bed With Alexa: Have Better Sex

Sex Communication: If You’re Not Talking, You’re Guessing (ft. Elizabeth Ashford)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa [https://www.instagram.com/sexwithalexa/]) gets in bed with certified holistic sex educator and Beyond the Beez [https://www.instagram.com/beyondthebeez/] founder Elizabeth Ashford [https://www.instagram.com/elizinator/] for a deeply practical, funny, and no-BS conversation about talking during sex—and why silence, shame, and faking orgasms are some of the biggest barriers to good sex. From dirty talk and giving direction to toys, lube, boundaries, aftercare, and post-sex debriefs, this episode is a masterclass in how communication transforms intimacy, pleasure, and connection. In this episode, Alexa and Elizabeth discuss: * Why silence during sex creates insecurity and confusion * Dirty talk vs simply communicating during sex * Using your voice for pleasure, direction, and curiosity * Why most people struggle to talk during sex * Cultural shame, lack of sex education, and sexual confidence * Finding your sexual voice and understanding your desires * Why dirty talk looks different for everyone * Trauma, shame, BDSM experience, and comfort levels with dirty talk * Blending dirty talk with practical direction * Giving feedback without killing the mood * Starting with positive reinforcement before giving direction * How safety makes sexual communication easier * How faking orgasms reinforces bad sex habits * Why honesty leads to better long-term sex * The orgasm gap and why penetration alone isn’t enough * Why partners need to genuinely care about your pleasure * Oral sex as a baseline expectation, not a bonus * “Non-eaters” as a dealbreaker * Curiosity as the foundation of good sex * Sex worth having vs sex worth avoiding * Starter phrases for people new to dirty talk * Keeping dirty talk simple and natural * Compliments during sex and feeling desired * Post-sex communication and debriefing * Aftercare beyond cuddling * Talking about what worked and what didn’t * Porn, audio erotica, and learning language for desire * Erotic menus and yes/maybe/no frameworks * Borrowing phrases instead of reinventing dirty talk Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beducate.me/pd2602-alexa [https://5ae06f57-73d3-4314-974d-0bc34569e2bc.pipedrive.email/c/zyrnq8mqz4/j4n52p6e54/pk6rz02xk0/4?redirectUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fbeducate.me%2Fpd2602-alexa&hash=iWIZ2fN7tKEqogBQx1h-POU8MAW3sVtNEI5-V-tZqTg] Thank you Splash Blanket [https://splashblanket.com] for keeping me and my guests cozy ◡̈

Real vs Fake Doms: How to Tell Them Apart (ft. Sir Marvelous)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa [https://www.instagram.com/sexwithalexa/]) gets in bed with pleasure coach, intimacy educator, and professional Dom Sir Marvelous [https://www.instagram.com/sirmarvelouskinks/] for a conversation about real dominance, fake Doms, pleasure-centered sex, and why communication and patience are the foundation of good BDSM—and good sex in general. This episode breaks down what dominance actually looks like beyond performance, how to spot manipulative dynamics early, and why prioritizing pleasure leads to deeper trust, safety, and better sex. In this episode, Alexa and Sir Marvelous discuss: * What actually makes someone a real Dom vs a fake Dom * Why “pleasure Dom” is often misunderstood and misused * How fake Doms weaponize submissive language on dating apps * Manipulation, rushing dynamics, and early red flags * Patience as the most attractive and essential Dom skill * Why dominance is about giving and not controlling * Why dominance doesn’t have to include pain, whips, or chains * Eating pussy before, during, and after penetration * Anxiety, erections, and why losing one isn’t a failure * Strap-ons, toys, and removing ego from penetration * Asking better questions about pleasure and satisfaction * The brain as the biggest sex organ * Post-sex debriefing: what worked, what didn’t, what to do more of * Advocating for pleasure in Dom/sub dynamics * Beginner Dom mistakes to avoid * Why Doms should experience submission or bottoming * Performative dominance vs authentic presence Thank you Splash Blanket [https://splashblanket.com] for keeping me and my guests cozy ◡̈

Vulnerability Is Hot: Sex, Masculinity, & Oversharing (ft. Emi Larraud)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa [https://www.instagram.com/sexwithalexa/]) gets in bed with musician and content creator Emi Larraud [https://www.instagram.com/emilarraud/] for a raw, funny, and deeply honest conversation about vulnerability, masculinity, oversharing on the internet, and why emotional availability makes men more desirable and better lovers. From shitting yourself on the subway to tips on how to be more vulnerable, this episode explores how being human, communicative, and emotionally present leads to better sex, safer intimacy, and more meaningful connections. In this episode, Alexa and Emi discuss: * Masculinity, patriarchy, and how it harms men * Why toughness, aggression, and emotional suppression are not attractive * Healthy masculinity and being raised with emotional permission * Men crying, expressing emotions, and being fully human * How emotional openness improves dating and sex * Why men shouldn’t center other men’s approval * Seeking male validation vs caring what women actually want * Listening to women instead of guessing what they want * Being bisexual and how that shaped Emi’s perspective on intimacy * The hot take: men who refuse to eat pussy are kinda gay * Why vulnerability filters out the wrong people * Getting approached more after being emotionally open * Emotional growth through therapy * Holding male friends accountable for harmful jokes * Sex, intimacy, and performance anxiety * Feeling pressure to perform sexually * Liking women vs just wanting to fuck them Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey. https://beducate.me/pd2602-alexa [Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey. https://beducate.me/pd2602-alexa] Thank you Splash Blanket [https://splashblanket.com] for keeping my guests cozy and mess-free <3 🔥 Want more? Join my ⁠Patreon⁠ [https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLink] for unedited episodes, behind-the-scenes tea on my personal dating & sex life, and access to my Close Friends on Instagram!

How Erotic Hypnosis Can Transform Your Sex Life (ft. Kate Shelor)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa [https://www.instagram.com/sexwithalexa/]) gets in bed with hypnotherapist and intimacy coach Kate Shelor [https://www.instagram.com/kateshelor/] for an in-depth conversation about erotic hypnosis, the subconscious mind, and how our thoughts, beliefs, and emotional conditioning shape pleasure, desire, and orgasm. Recorded on the Temptation Cruise, this episode breaks down what hypnosis really is, how it differs from pop-culture myths, and how erotic hypnosis can help people get out of their heads, release sexual shame, and reconnect with their bodies. In this episode, Alexa and Kate discuss: * The role of the subconscious mind in sex, pleasure, and behavior * Why so many people struggle to stay present during sex * Anxiety, body image, and self-conscious thoughts in the bedroom * How hypnosis helps people get out of their heads and into sensation * Why all hypnosis is ultimately self-hypnosis * Consent, collaboration, and personal agency in hypnosis * Common myths about hypnosis from movies and pop culture * Whether some people are “more hypnotizable” than others * Sexual blocks related to orgasms, erections, and arousal * Kate’s personal journey using hypnotherapy to overcome orgasm struggles * How language and self-talk program sexual responses * The power of repetition in shaping subconscious beliefs * Blindfolds, sensory deprivation, and imagination in erotic play * Practical self-hypnosis and mindset exercises for home * Auditing negative self-talk and replacing it intentionally * Rewriting old conditioning with new emotional experiences * Why the subconscious mind overrides logic every time * Surrounding yourself with sex-positive language and media * The best time of day for self-hypnosis * How long hypnosis takes to create change 🔥 Want more? Join my ⁠Patreon⁠ [https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLink] for unedited episodes, behind-the-scenes tea on my personal dating & sex life, and access to my Close Friends on Instagram!

Decentering Penetration: Tantra, Orgasms & Expansive Sex (ft. Davia Frost)

Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa [https://www.instagram.com/sexwithalexa/]) gets in bed with tantric practitioner, pleasure educator, and soon-to-be author Davia Frost [https://www.instagram.com/frostedpleasure/] for a deep conversation about decentering penetration and expanding what sex can be. Recorded on the Temptation Cruise, this episode explores how slowing down, breathing, presence, and creativity can lead to more satisfying, intimate, and embodied pleasure without sex needing to revolve around penetration. We discuss: * What it means to decenter penetration and why penetration is overemphasized in mainstream culture * How expanding your definition of sex increases pleasure, intimacy, and satisfaction * Why heterosexual couples tend to rush to intercourse and how this limits pleasure * Using the full body as an instrument of pleasure rather than focusing only on genitals * Slowing down, softening the body, and learning how to receive pleasure * Myths around sex, obligation, and the idea that penetration is required * Making penetration optional without sex feeling “incomplete” * Erogenous zones beyond genitals (neck, ears, inner thighs, behind the knees, clavicle, elbows, nipples) * Nipple play and nipple orgasms * Different types of orgasms and expanding orgasmic capacity * Breathwork, sound, humming, and tantra as tools for pleasure * Why holding your breath can limit orgasmic potential * Presence vs performance in sex * Oral sex as intimacy, honoring, and shared pleasure rather than a chore * Eye gazing, kissing, dirty talk, and touch as deeply intimate acts * Ego, vulnerability, and why sex often ends when penetration ends * Ending sex based on satisfaction, not orgasms or penetration * Communication strategies for talking about pleasure without hurting egos * Sexual menus, check-ins, and having conversations outside the bedroom * Scheduling intimacy, playfulness, and creative erotic invitations * What straight couples can learn from queer sex culture Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Use code ALEXA to try their platform for free for 24h and, if you love it, get 50% off their yearly pass. 14 day money back guarantee if you don't! Click here to sign up: https://beducate.me/pd2548-alexa [https://5ae06f57-73d3-4314-974d-0bc34569e2bc.pipedrive.email/c/zyrnq8mqz4/j4n52p6e54/jkq3eg9z46/4?redirectUrl=https%3A%2F%2Fbeducate.me%2Fpd2548-alexa&hash=C8XemfuAIPiWp_tfq-Vq6bnGHvVu5nEeDcErB4sqg-g] 🔥 Want more? Join my ⁠Patreon [https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLink]⁠ for unedited episodes, behind-the-scenes tea on my personal dating & sex life, and access to my Close Friends on Instagram!