Leadership Confidential with Lena Reinhard

Difficult Conversations: How to Initiate and Talk About Tough Topics with Nikita Rathi

We've all been there - That moment when you know it's time to have that conversation you've been dreading. The one that makes your stomach clench. The one you would rather run away from. So, how do you handle these conversations? How do you keep it from becoming such a big thing in the first place? This episode is a deep dive into what makes some conversations feel difficult: being torn between compassion and performance that some managers experience and practical strategies for saying no without burning bridges. We explore dynamics that can make these conversations even trickier for women and other minorities in tech and why it makes the biggest difference to focus your leadership approach on consistent, caring leadership instead of perfect moments. Our guest is Nikita Rathi. Nikita has been in the tech industry for several years, transitioning from linguistics to software development, and now leading engineering teams and organizations. She has navigated the complexities of managing performance while maintaining empathy, dealt with the challenge of saying no in a people pleasing culture, and hard lessons about setting boundaries. In this episode, she shares wisdom and practical advice on having difficult conversations. This conversation was recorded in January 2024. Find the ⁠full episode transcript here [www.lenareinhard.com/articles/difficult-conversations-with-nikita-rathi-lcps01e15]⁠.

Peer & Leadership Alignment

Small gaps in alignment at the leadership level become canyons by the time they reach your teams. Alignment, as in people really agreeing on what to do, why, and how to get it done. It's also one of those leadership things that sounds so simple and straightforward in theory. But we all know that it's not always that easy in practice. My guest for this episode, Neil, brings his experiences on the topic of alignment. Neil has 25 years of experience in the industry. He's primarily worked in startup contexts, focusing on communications and data aggregation. For the last 10 years, he's been in senior engineering leadership positions with organizations of 50-100 people. Neil and I talk about how to spot misalignment before it becomes a canyon and a crisis. We speak about the hard work of building genuine consensus at the leadership level and how to translate high level strategy into something that your engineering teams can actually use to make decisions. Together, we bring you practical mechanics of creating alignment that is not just nodding along in meetings, but the kind that permeates every aspect of decision making within your organization. This conversation was recorded in June 2024. The full episode transcript is available here [www.lenareinhard.com/articles/peer-and-leadership-alignment-lcps01e14].

Disability & Leadership in Tech

When you're ill or disabled and working in the tech field, the long hours can be not just counterproductive, but discriminatory. And it is also because of these stated ideas of productivity and leadership that disabled leaders often remain invisible, but they do exist, and we are here to talk to one today. Our guest is Sally Lait, an experienced senior leader with two decades experience in roles, including engineering director and VP of Engineering. Sally's insights about energy management, boundary setting, and intentional leadership are wonderful for all of us. This conversation was recorded in August 2024. Resources * MECFS foundations (SolveCFS [https://solvecfs.org/] | ME Association [https://meassociation.org.uk/]) * Inclusive Design Guidebook (PDF [https://inclusive.microsoft.design/tools-and-activities/Inclusive101Guidebook.pdf]) * Creating Inclusive Career Leaders (Talk [https://leaddev.com/leaddev-london-2023/video/creating-inclusive-career-ladders] | Slides [https://leaddev.com/sites/default/files/2023-07/Creating-inclusive%20career-ladders.pdf]) * Manager Service Levels (Article [https://stephaniedreyer.co.uk/manager-slas/]) * Statistics on disabled people in tech (Article [https://www.bcs.org/articles-opinion-and-research/nearly-90-000-disabled-people-are-missing-from-tech-industry-says-professional-body/]) Find the full episode transcript here [www.lenareinhard.com/articles/disability-leadership-in-tech-lcps01e13].

Being Stylish and Belonging in Tech: From Trying to Fit in To Expressing Yourself In a culture of Hoodies And Jeans

“What does a leader look like?”, is a question we come back to here often, and this time, we take it literally: I meet with five exceptional senior leaders to talk about what it’s like being interested in style and fashion in tech, of all places, where it’s long been seen as most fashionable not to care about these topics, where an implicit but strongly-enforced dress code of dark hoodies, t-shirts, and jeans reigned, and where the resulting “uniform” culture has been hard on everyone who doesn’t fit traditional ideas of what an engineer, a “technical person”, a “geek”, a leader looks like. So, how do you convey that you are all of those things, when you don’t look like the stereotype of someone who is? We talk about our journeys in attempts to fit in, exploring ways of expressing and being ourselves, and the stressful mental gymnastics involved in calculating how our appearance may support or undermine how we’re viewed and treated. We dive into being “firsts” in visible positions, and how we found style as a tool for empowerment, connection, and representation, and close with some favorite styles and recommendations to find your own. I loved having this conversation, and I hope you enjoy it too. “I think style and fashion is such an important part of self-actualization, and becoming that greater version of yourself, and it is a big part of how people perceive you, so it gives me great joy to feel self-actualised on a particular day and feel like I am representing the true version of myself.” — Christina This conversation was recorded in October 2024. Find the full episode transcript here [www.lenareinhard.com/articles/being-stylish-and-belonging-in-tech-from-trying-to-fit-in-to-expressing-yourself-in-a-culture-of-hoodies-and-jeans-lcps01e12].

Welcome Back! A Note from Lena

The Leadership Confidential podcast is back from a short hiatus. New episodes coming soon!