She's Rooted Life Podcast

Episode 13: Redeemed in the Delivery Room: Worship and God’s Presence in Childbirth

In this deeply moving episode of the She’s Rooted Life Podcast, Talia sits down with birth doula and student midwife Julie Vasquez to explore the intersection of faith, birth, fear, and loss. Together, they discuss traumatic birth experiences, miscarriage, surrender in labor, worship during childbirth, and how God redeems even the most painful stories. This episode offers hope, theological grounding, and compassionate presence for anyone navigating pregnancy, birth, or grief. Trigger Warning: This episode includes discussion of traumatic birth experiences and pregnancy loss. Blog Post: Redeemed in the Delivery Room: Worship and God’s Presence in Childbirth After my first pregnancy ending in miscarriage and my first birth experience being traumatic, pregnancy and birth carried a lot of trauma & fear. By the time I was pregnant with my third baby (I got to hold in my arms), my body already carried the memories. High blood pressure. Inductions. Miscarriage. Trauma that didn’t disappear just because time passed or another pregnancy came. Fear lived in my nervous system, not just my thoughts. So when I found myself four weeks from my due date, carrying both hope and anxiety, I prayed a very simple prayer: Lord, I just want Your presence. I want peace in the room. That’s when Julie came to mind. I had never met her before. I barely knew her name. But I reached out anyway. Four weeks out. No plan B. And she said yes. What I didn’t know at the time was that God wasn’t just answering a logistical prayer. He was preparing redemption. Julie is a birth doula and a woman deeply anchored in the Lord. She didn’t come in with control or promises. She came with presence, wisdom and peace. She had such a deep understanding of birth that felt radically different than what I had known before. One of the most important things Julie shared in our conversation was this: birth is about surrender. Not passivity or denial of pain, but surrender. Pain doesn’t mean something has gone wrong. Pain means something is being produced. At 38 weeks, we discovered my son was transverse, positioned sideways in my womb. For many, that diagnosis immediately leads to fear and talk of a C-section. And I was ready to surrender to whatever needed to happen. All that mattered to me was safety. But Julie reminded me that the body and the baby often know what to do. Through prayer, chiropractic care, and trust, my son turned. But even after that, fear lingered. Fear from past loss & trauma. This fear that lived was deeper than logic. Julie talked about how fear affects the body during labor. When we are tense, labor is harder. Longer and more painful. But when we feel safe, seen, supported, oxytocin flows. Love flows. Peace becomes possible. When my water broke naturally, I labored at home as long as I could. And when I needed space, quiet, and containment, we went to the hospital. That room became holy ground. There were candles. Soft lights. Worship music. A nurse who understood. A midwife who loved Jesus. And a doula who gently reminded me to praise. I remember singing through contractions. Crying out to God. Choosing worship in moments where everything in my body wanted to brace or fight. And something shifted. Pain didn’t disappear. But fear loosened its grip. That birth was not just the arrival of my son. It was redemption. I got to experience natural birth for the first time, no induction like my other two and no epidural that I still carry the impacts of with my first. Julie later named it what I felt but couldn’t articulate at the time. A “redeeming birth.” One where what had been stolen before was restored. Where worship replaced fear. Where God met me not after the pain, but in it. Not every birth looks like that. We talk about that too. Julie shared her own story of pregnancy loss. The shock, grief and unanswered questions. And the sacred permission she was given to grieve fully. Loss leaves attachment pain. And attachment pain doesn’t respond to explanations or theology alone. It needs presence. Someone willing to sit with you and not rush you through it. As Christians, we don’t grieve without hope. But we still grieve. And sometimes the most faithful thing we can do is sit with someone in their sorrow and say nothing at all. This conversation reminded me that joy and grief can coexist. That God does not waste pain. That worship doesn’t deny suffering, it transforms it. Birth mirrors life in so many ways. The waiting. The endurance. The not knowing how many contractions are left and the surrender required to move forward. But on the other side, there is life. And in the middle and all around from beginning to end, there is Jesus. Welcome back to the She’s Rooted Life Podcast. Today’s episode is a tender and sacred conversation about birth, fear, worship, loss, and the redemptive presence of God in some of the most vulnerable moments of our lives. Before we begin, I want to offer a gentle trigger warning. In today’s episode, we discuss traumatic birth experiences and pregnancy loss. Please listen with care and take what you need. Today, I’m joined by my dear friend Julie Vasquez. Born and raised in Southern California, Julie Vasquez is a student midwife and birth doula who has attended over 60 births. She is a mother to six children and grandmother to a one year old granddaughter. She has been with her husband since she was just 16 years old. In 2021, Julie and her family moved to East Tennessee where she is currently serving the birth community and expectant mothers who birth at home or in a hospital. When she is not at a birth she enjoys gardening, quilting, riding her horses, and hiking. In this episode, Julie and I talk about what a doula truly does, how fear and surrender shape birth, the power of worship during labor, and how God meets us in both joy and loss. This conversation is for anyone longing for peace, redemption, and hope in the midst of birth and beyond.

E12: A Faith You Can Breathe In: When Obedience Becomes Peace with Bethany Joy

What if obedience was never meant to be rooted in fear, shame, or self-protection? In this episode of the She’s Rooted Life Podcast, Talia sits down with Bethany Joy for a deeply honest conversation about obedience, attachment, shame, and healing. Together, they explore how early spiritual formation, trauma, and insecure attachment shape the way we relate to God, and why obedience feels impossible when we don’t feel safe. This episode unpacks: • how shame distorts obedience • why self-protection blocks intimacy with God • the impact of attuning to our body in spiritual healing • obedience as an outflow of secure attachment Rather than obedience as performance, this conversation reframes obedience as listening, attunement, and trust. It is an invitation into healing, safety, and a faith that integrates body, soul, and spirit. If you’ve ever wrestled with obedience, perfectionism, or fear in your relationship with God, this episode will meet you with compassion, clarity, and hope.Connect with Bethany: https://linktr.ee/bethanyjoyministry

E11: Attachment Pain, A Culture Addicted to Distraction, & the Lost Skill of Quieting w/Jen Coursey

In this conversation, Talia interviews Jen Coursey, Executive Director of THRIVEtoday, speaker, brain skills trainer, and cocreator of Thrive Training, to explore why distraction, busyness, and coping habits have replaced true joy in our lives. Together, they unpack the Life Model concepts of quieting, attachment pain, and BEEPS, the behaviors, events, experiences, people, and substances we use to temporarily escape emotional pain. Jen shares her own journey of learning how to be still, how relational skills are formed and strengthened, and why joy must be practiced in safe, mutual connection. This episode also addresses church hurt, relational maturity, and how faith communities can move beyond theology alone to embody the character of Christ through emotional regulation, repair, and presence. A hopeful and practical conversation for anyone longing for deeper connection with God, others, and themselves.Connect with Jen & ThriveToday at: www.thrivetoday.org [http://www.thrivetoday.org] Relational Skills in Real Life Podcast: https://thrivetoday.buzzsprout.com/ [https://thrivetoday.buzzsprout.com/]

E10: How Attachment Shapes Our Faith & Our Relationships with Monica Mouer

Hi friends 🤍 Welcome back to the She’s Rooted Life Podcast. Today’s episode is a rich and grounding conversation with Monica Mouer, founder of the Center for Family Transformation and the Center for Transformation Institute. Monica’s work was one of the reasons my family felt peace about moving to Charlotte, and it was such an honor to sit with her and share this dialogue. Before we dive in, we’re celebrating a milestone. This is our 10th episode. Only about 10 percent of podcasts ever make it to 10 episodes, and here we are. We have many more episodes already recorded and ready to go, and we’re just getting started. And here’s our big surprise. The She’s Rooted Life website is officially live, with corresponding blog posts for the past 3 podcast episodes (coming for every episode soon) so you can revisit, reflect, and go deeper beyond the audio. You can find it here: Shesrootedlife.com In this episode, we explore: * What attachment theory is and how it shapes our relationships * The three insecure attachment patterns and how they form * Why secure attachment requires both intimacy and independence * How attachment patterns show up in adulthood and in our faith * What it means to have secure attachment with the Lord * The power of hesed, the Lord’s steadfast and unrelenting love * Why attachment styles are not personality traits and how healing is possible * How relationships become the pathway for spiritual maturity and transformation This conversation is an introduction to attachment theory through the lens of the Life Model and Scripture. My hope is that it builds compassion for yourself and others, and invites you into deeper connection with the Lord and your people. All resources mentioned in this episode, including Monica’s work and training institute, are linked in the show notes. Thank you for listening, and as always, may you stay rooted in love. Talia 🤍 Resources:  Center for Family Transformation: https://www.familytransformation.com/ [https://www.familytransformation.com/]Center for Transformation Institute: https://cftinstitute.com/ [https://cftinstitute.com/]Landscapes of the Soul: https://a.co/d/h5yZAue [https://a.co/d/h5yZAue] A CONVERSATION WITH MONICA MOUER OF THE CENTER FOR FAMILY TRANSFORMATION Some conversations clarify things you have been living for a long time. This conversation with Monica Mouer did exactly that for me. Before I ever met Monica, her work had brought peace to a major decision in my life. When my family was discerning a move to Charlotte, learning about the Center for Family Transformation felt like a deep exhale. There was someone here who spoke the language of healing I had been walking out & learning for some time. Someone whose work is shaped by the Life Model. For a long time, I had been looking for a therapist who was informed by that framework, and I found that at the Center for Family Transformation, thanks to Monica. When we finally sat down together, what unfolded was not an interview. It was an invitation. Monica speaks about attachment the way someone does when they have watched it change lives, including their own. Attachment is not a theory to her. It is a story woven into the nervous system, into the way we reach for love and brace for disappointment at the same time. We are wired for connection. That truth is ancient, biological, and spiritual all at once. Secure attachment, Monica shared, does not come from perfect parenting or flawless relationships. It comes from presence. From being seen and responded to enough of the time that the soul learns to rest. When that presence is inconsistent, absent, or frightening, the body adapts. It learns how to survive without safety. Some of us learned to stay loud, vigilant, and emotionally stretched, always scanning for connection. Some of us learned to go quiet, self contained, and emotionally distant, turning down the volume of our need. Some of us learned to want closeness and fear it at the same time. None of these patterns are failures. They are testimonies to resilience. What struck me most was how gently Monica held these realities. There was no pathology in her voice, no labeling meant to shrink a person down to their wounds. Only compassion for the younger selves who did what they had to do to stay alive. As the conversation moved forward, we began to talk about intimacy and independence. Two words that are often set in opposition to each other, but were never meant to be. Secure attachment requires both. To cling without autonomy is not connection. To stand alone without intimacy is not strength. Life lives in the tension of being rooted and reaching at the same time. This is where the conversation widened, stretching beyond human relationships and into the spiritual. Attachment does not stop with parents or partners. We attach to the Lord. Dr. Jim Wilder’s work within the Life Model framework names something many of us have sensed but never articulated. We can experience secure or insecure attachment with the Lord in much the same way we do with people. The same nervous systems that learned to brace for absence or inconsistency will bring those expectations into prayer, worship, and trust. But the Lord is not like us. There is a word in Scripture, hesed, often translated as steadfast love. Monica described it as what Life Model says “sticky love”. Love that does not withdraw. Love that does not tire. Love that stays. The Lord’s love is not responsive to our performance. It is responsive to our existence. That kind of love rearranges a person from the inside out. It loosens the grip of self protection. It softens the need to prove, strive, or disappear. When that love is received deeply, it begins to flow outward, not as obligation, but as overflow. Healing, Monica said, does not begin with shame. It begins with gratitude. Those old patterns, the ones we wish we could erase, once kept us alive. They deserve thanks, not contempt. And when we thank them, when we honor the way they served us, we can finally release them from running our lives. What changes when someone begins to earn secure attachment is not perfection. It is capacity. The capacity to stay present under stress. The capacity to love without self preservation. The capacity to empathize without losing oneself. This is what maturity looks like. Not invulnerability, but rootedness. As we closed our conversation, I kept thinking about how countercultural this way of living truly is. We live in a world that rewards boundaries without relationship, self protection without sacrifice, and distance without grief. But healing does not happen in isolation. It happens in connection. Healthy relationships are not a bonus feature of spiritual growth. They are the soil where it grows. The Lord designed us to be formed by love. To be shaped in community. To mature as we learn how to stay connected even when it costs us something. This conversation was a reminder that secure attachment is not just something we heal into. It is something we are invited into, again and again, with the Lord and with one another. And that love, the kind that does not let go, is where we finally come home.

E9: New Wine Season: Rhythms of Joy & Peace

In this lighter, reflective solo episode, we talk about closing out the year with intention, margin, and rest. I share what it looks like to choose joy, presence, and simple rhythms as we transition into a new season. This episode reframes “new year, new everything” through a Kingdom lens. Instead of striving, overworking, or survival-based productivity, we explore how Jesus invites us into rest, alignment, and becoming. Using the image of new wine and new wineskins, we reflect on how stepping into the new often requires releasing old patterns and ways of functioning that no longer serve us. We talk about how growth can feel uncomfortable, how not everyone is ready for the new God is doing in us, and why that does not mean we stop moving forward. This conversation is about living with Jesus, not just for Him, and allowing joy and peace to become the rhythm of our lives. We close by moving into the second She’s Rooted Life resource, created to help you reflect, release, and dream with God as you enter the new year rooted, grounded, and open to the new He is already doing. Resources: https://drive.google.com/file/d/16Jsg3l9EXggHqZahu3X2XLbc8TrgOL4V/view?usp=sharing NEW WINE SEASONS: RHYTHMS OF JOY & PEACE As we step into a new year, there is often a cultural rush toward reinvention. New goals. New habits. New versions of ourselves. But this episode invites a different kind of “new.” One rooted not in striving or survival, but in surrender, presence, and aligned rhythms with the Lord. This solo episode marks the close of a season of reflection and the beginning of something quieter, deeper, and more intentional. It is an invitation to consider what it looks like to live life with Jesus, not just for Him, and to allow joy and peace to become our baseline rather than the exception. NEW WINE REQUIRES NEW RHYTHMS Scripture reminds us that new wine cannot be poured into old wineskins. When the Lord does something new, it often requires the release of old patterns, coping strategies, and relational dynamics that no longer fit who we are becoming. This kind of growth can feel uncomfortable. As we step out of old survival responses, others may not always be ready for the change. But moving forward in freedom does not require everyone’s approval. Faithfulness often looks like continuing to walk forward even when the new is not yet understood. The Lord is always forming us, and formation is rarely rushed. New seasons ask for expansion, and expansion asks for trust. ROOTED, NOT RUSHED Much of what we call productivity is actually survival. Jesus invites us into something different. A life marked by rest, presence, and becoming. Being rooted in Christ is not about spiritual performance. It is about steadiness. Like a tree planted by streams of water, we are formed over time through consistent, life-giving rhythms. This kind of rootedness creates security, clarity, and resilience, especially in seasons of transition. This past year has felt like a cocoon season. Not isolation, but intentional pruning. A letting go of over-functioning, shrinking, and striving for belonging. In its place, the Lord formed rest, secure attachment, and a deep knowing that love does not need to be earned. JOY, QUIETING, PEACE, AND APPRECIATION At the heart of this episode is an invitation into rhythms that form joy and peace in everyday life. Joy is not a personality trait or a fleeting emotion. It is a relational experience, the gladness of being with another. Quieting allows the body to release tension and rest without striving. Peace is the internal settling that comes from trusting that all is held, even when we do not understand how. Appreciation is the practice of savoring what is already present, allowing goodness to linger. These rhythms are not automatic. They are practiced. Scripture reminds us that transformation comes through renewal, and renewal often requires intentional retraining of our attention. When appreciation becomes a habit, joy begins to rewire what feels normal. LIVING FROM SECURE ATTACHMENT Secure attachment with the Lord shapes how we show up everywhere else. As we learn to live from belovedness rather than fear, our relationships change. The right people stay. The right connections no longer require chasing or proving. This episode invites reflection not around achievement, but around formation. Who is the Lord drawing you toward? What rhythms are forming you? Where is He inviting you to slow down, notice, and receive? AN INVITATION TO BEGIN This episode is paired with the Rooted Rhythms resource, created to help you reflect, release, and dream with the Lord in a grounded and embodied way. It offers simple practices for cultivating joy, peace, and appreciation, both personally and relationally. As you enter this new season, may you feel permission to move gently. May joy and peace become familiar companions. And may you discover that the Lord is already glad to be with you, right where you are. Happy New Year, friends.