Friendships Unplugged

Silvia: friendship, covered in dog hair

In this episode, host Iris and guest Silvia discuss how they met at work via a mutual friend, bonding over shared interests (cars, dogs, living abroad, building houses) and initially “checking each other out” before connecting more deeply. They contrast superficial socializing with deeper connection, noting extrovert/introvert energy differences. Silvia describes maintaining about 10 long-term close friendships even with infrequent contact, and explains how new friendships formed through shared passions like racing, strengthened by quiet settings and mutual vulnerability (including discussing burnout) that can also improve workplace team dynamics. They emphasize balanced give-and-take, fun alongside support, boundaries with people who refuse accountability, the harms of jealousy and narcissism, and practical ways to make friends, including boldly introducing yourself and remembering most awkward moments are quickly forgotten and what really counts at the end of the days.

Jess: Navigating Loneliness and making Connections

On this episode, host Iris interviews Jess, a listener who responded to a social media call for people who struggle with loneliness. Jess describes how ending a 14-year friendship left her spiraling, lonely, and without her “person,” though loneliness has been intermittent throughout her life. She says she is generally liked and can easily socialize, but connections rarely deepen beyond acquaintances, and she feels forgettable despite strong values, directness, and political passion. They discuss the difference between meeting people and maintaining friendships, the role of matching values, intentional effort, and vulnerability, including not turning down invitations and directly asking to pursue friendship. Jess recounts the lack of closure when her former best friend unfriended her and avoided conflict, and she reflects on choosing peace while still craving more human connection.

Rogier: intention and effort in friendships

Iris  interviews her friend Rogier, who flew from the Netherlands to Switzerland especially to record the podcast episode. They recount meeting as colleagues at a technology company and becoming friends after Iris drove to Austria to meet Rogier’s wife and newborn, leading to a tradition of family visits. Rogier values friendships that bring energy, growth, new perspectives, and depth beyond superficial conversation, and says friendships often fade when there isn’t enough shared direction. They discuss trust-building, loneliness arising from busyness and fear of vulnerability, and the meaninglessness of lacking connection, with examples from childhood social openness and Rogier’s Kilimanjaro trip. Rogier advises finding people through activities and sustaining bonds through intentional effort and small gestures, while balancing family and friendships.

Fiona: asking for what you need in a friendship

In this episode of 'Friendships Unplugged,' Fiona and Iris explore the dynamics of adult friendships, starting with their story of meeting as colleagues in Switzerland. Despite initial disagreements and personality differences, their mutual respect and dedication to their work fostered a lasting friendship. The conversation touches on the challenges and rewards of maintaining meaningful relationships, especially during times of personal growth and hardship. Fiona recounts their shared experiences, such as bonding over common interests and supporting each other during COVID-19 isolation. They discuss the importance of vulnerability, emotional intelligence, and intentionality in building deep connections. Fiona also shares practical advice for those struggling with loneliness, emphasizing the power of reaching out to others and the significance of small gestures like hugs. The episode highlights the value of diverse friendships across gender and cultural lines in enhancing understanding and support systems.

Manu: sister from another mister

In this lively episode of 'Friendships Unplugged,' the host welcomes Manu, one of her oldest and closest friends, to delve into their 26-year-long friendship. They recount hilarious and heartwarming memories, like meeting on a train, stealing a Christmas tree for a party, and facing life’s ups and downs together. Manu shares her perspective on what makes a friendship last, emphasizing mutual effort, kindness, and listening to your gut. The host and Manu discuss how they've learned from each other over the years—like setting boundaries and embracing directness—and offer advice for those feeling lonely or looking to deepen their connections. With stories that range from the mundane to the outrageous, this episode is a testament to the joy and value of true friendship.