NDA: No D*cks Allowed

Chasing Gold Stars

31 min · 16. juni 2026
episode Chasing Gold Stars cover

Beskrivelse

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2602993/fan_mail/new] TW: This episode includes discussion of burnout, serious medical events, and brief references to suicidal thoughts. Listener discretion is advised. We’re taught that perfectionism is a sign of ambition. That it means we care. That it’s what separates high performers from everyone else. But what if perfectionism isn’t really about excellence at all? In this episode, we unpack the hidden fear beneath perfectionism and explore how many women learn to tie their worth to achievement, productivity, and getting everything "right." We discuss the childhood gold stars, workplace praise, and societal expectations that reinforce the belief that mistakes are dangerous and rest must be earned. We're taking a look at the difference between excellence and perfectionism, why perfectionism often starts as protection, and how the very behaviors that once helped us succeed can eventually leave us exhausted, anxious, and disconnected from ourselves. Because the opposite of perfectionism isn't mediocrity. It's self-trust. If you've ever felt like your value depends on your performance, this conversation is for you. Thank you for listening to NDA! If this episode made you think, challenged a perspective, or helped you recognize a pattern in yourself, consider sharing it with someone else who might need the conversation. You can connect with us on Instagram at @nda_pod, where we continue the discussion between episodes. Until next time, notice the pattern. Then decide what happens next.

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Alle episoder

13 Episoder

episode Chasing Gold Stars cover

Chasing Gold Stars

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2602993/fan_mail/new] TW: This episode includes discussion of burnout, serious medical events, and brief references to suicidal thoughts. Listener discretion is advised. We’re taught that perfectionism is a sign of ambition. That it means we care. That it’s what separates high performers from everyone else. But what if perfectionism isn’t really about excellence at all? In this episode, we unpack the hidden fear beneath perfectionism and explore how many women learn to tie their worth to achievement, productivity, and getting everything "right." We discuss the childhood gold stars, workplace praise, and societal expectations that reinforce the belief that mistakes are dangerous and rest must be earned. We're taking a look at the difference between excellence and perfectionism, why perfectionism often starts as protection, and how the very behaviors that once helped us succeed can eventually leave us exhausted, anxious, and disconnected from ourselves. Because the opposite of perfectionism isn't mediocrity. It's self-trust. If you've ever felt like your value depends on your performance, this conversation is for you. Thank you for listening to NDA! If this episode made you think, challenged a perspective, or helped you recognize a pattern in yourself, consider sharing it with someone else who might need the conversation. You can connect with us on Instagram at @nda_pod, where we continue the discussion between episodes. Until next time, notice the pattern. Then decide what happens next.

16. juni 202631 min
episode Body Image: Appreciation Sold Separately cover

Body Image: Appreciation Sold Separately

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2602993/fan_mail/new] TW: This episode includes discussion of body image, weight, eating disorder recovery, sexual abuse, medical procedures, and women's experiences with body-based judgment and objectification. Listener discretion is advised. Women are taught early that our bodies are projects. Something to improve. Something to shrink. Something to manage. Something to earn approval through. In this deeply personal episode, we unpack the complicated relationship women have with their bodies and the messages that shaped it from childhood comments and beauty standards to workplace expectations, intimacy, confidence, and self-worth. We share our own experiences with body image, weight, health, trauma, and the realization that so much of life can be spent waiting to become "acceptable." This isn't a conversation about loving every part of yourself every second of every day. It's a conversation about what changes when you stop treating your body like a problem to solve. Thank you for listening to NDA! If this episode made you think, challenged a perspective, or helped you recognize a pattern in yourself, consider sharing it with someone else who might need the conversation. You can connect with us on Instagram at @nda_pod, where we continue the discussion between episodes. Until next time, notice the pattern. Then decide what happens next.

9. juni 202636 min
episode Inconveniently Complex cover

Inconveniently Complex

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2602993/fan_mail/new] We love to talk about generations. Boomers don't like change. Millennials are entitled. Gen Z doesn't want to work. At least that's what we're told. In this episode, we're unpacking why generational stereotypes have become one of the most socially accepted forms of bias and what gets lost when we reduce complex human beings (especially women) to labels. The moment we start using those labels to explain someone's entire personality, we stop being curious about who they actually are. We explore: • Why generational stereotypes feel so easy to believe • The fear and uncertainty often hiding underneath them • How these assumptions show up in workplaces and leadership • The hidden cost of replacing curiosity with judgment • Why women have an opportunity to learn from, not compete with, women in different generations Human beings are inconveniently complex, but maybe that's not a problem to solve. Maybe that's the point. Thank you for listening to NDA! If this episode made you think, challenged a perspective, or helped you recognize a pattern in yourself, consider sharing it with someone else who might need the conversation. You can connect with us on Instagram at @nda_pod, where we continue the discussion between episodes. Until next time, notice the pattern. Then decide what happens next.

2. juni 202628 min
episode Too Humble to Be Seen cover

Too Humble to Be Seen

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2602993/fan_mail/new] Women are often taught that humility is a virtue. And it is, until it becomes self-erasure. In this episode, we unpack the way many women instinctively minimize their accomplishments, deflect praise, over-credit others, and move past their wins without ever fully allowing themselves to feel proud of what they achieved. We explore how women are socially conditioned to prioritize humility, likability, and belonging, while confidence and visible self-advocacy are often rewarded differently in men, especially in leadership and workplace environments. Over time, many women learn that being visible can feel risky, so they shrink their contributions before anyone else has the chance to. The result? Women who are deeply capable become overlooked, under-recognized, and disconnected from their own success. This conversation is not about arrogance, ego, or becoming louder than everyone else. It’s about learning the difference between bragging and healthy ownership, and understanding that acknowledging your contribution does not take anything away from the people around you. Because there’s a difference between being humble… and disappearing from your own story. Thank you for listening to NDA! If this episode made you think, challenged a perspective, or helped you recognize a pattern in yourself, consider sharing it with someone else who might need the conversation. You can connect with us on Instagram at @nda_pod, where we continue the discussion between episodes. Until next time, notice the pattern. Then decide what happens next.

26. mai 202633 min
episode "I'm Fine": The Lies We Tell to Keep the Peace cover

"I'm Fine": The Lies We Tell to Keep the Peace

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2602993/fan_mail/new] We say it constantly. To our partners, our kids, our coworkers, our friends. "I'm fine." But what are we actually saying? We're saying: my feelings are too much. My needs are inconvenient. It's easier if I just disappear a little. In this episode, we get into one of the quietest and most costly shrinking behaviors women do, swallowing their real emotions to preserve relationships, keep the peace, and avoid being labeled dramatic, difficult, or too much. Because somewhere along the way, we learned that being easy to deal with was more important than being honest about how we actually feel, what we need, and what we're afraid of. We dig into why emotional suppression becomes a survival strategy, what it costs when we abandon ourselves to manage everyone else's comfort, and why, by the time the lid finally blows off, it was never really about that one moment anyway. If you've ever held it together so long you scared yourself when you finally didn't, this one's for you. Thank you for listening to NDA! If this episode made you think, challenged a perspective, or helped you recognize a pattern in yourself, consider sharing it with someone else who might need the conversation. You can connect with us on Instagram at @nda_pod, where we continue the discussion between episodes. Until next time, notice the pattern. Then decide what happens next.

19. mai 202625 min