Adulting with Autism

Autistic Burnout, People-Pleasing & Self-Trust: Mindset Tools That Actually Help (Karin Velicka)

Do you feel like you have to perform to be accepted—at work, in relationships, even in your own self-talk? In this episode of Adulting with Autism, we're joined by Karin Velicka, a certified self-love and mindset coach, former professional athlete, and author of the upcoming book Dear Me Letters. Karin shares her journey from a high-achieving finance path to coaching and emotional healing, and offers practical tools for autistic and ADHD adults who are navigating self-doubt, people-pleasing, burnout cycles, and major career transitions. We talk about why "quick fixes" rarely stick, how to build self-trust through small consistent steps, and how to make self-compassion feel real (not forced or fake). In this episode, we cover: * Signs you may need deeper inner work (overachieving, people-pleasing, weak boundaries) * How to break limiting beliefs like "I'm not enough" and untangle generational patterns * Why letter-writing can be more powerful than traditional journaling * Self-love for neurodivergent adults: improving the inner dialogue without toxic positivity * A gentle entry point to breathwork for trauma, overwhelm, or sensory discomfort (eyes open is okay) * How autistic professionals can reduce overwork guilt with boundaries and "schedule a date with yourself" * Career transition clarity: radical honesty, courage, and walking with fear instead of letting it stop you * Why slow progress is real progress—and how to celebrate it Guest: Karin Velicka Instagram: velicka.karin Website / Book updates: VelickaKarin.com (upcoming: Dear Me Letters) If you found this episode helpful, follow Adulting with Autism, leave a review, and share it with someone searching for autism self-love, mindset coaching, people-pleasing recovery, burnout, or career transition support

Late ADHD Diagnosis at 56, Dyslexia, and Breaking the "Failure Identity" — John O'Shea on NeuroSpicy

What happens when you're diagnosed with ADHD at 56—after a lifetime of dyslexia, chaos, big wins, big losses, and school trauma that taught you you'd never be "enough"? In this episode of Adulting With Autism, we talk with John O'Shea, author of NeuroSpicy, about late diagnosis, anger and shame, the nervous system cost of being punished for learning differently, and how ADHD isn't a deficit of attention—it can be an overload of thoughts "like a V8 with no brakes." John shares how the end of his 32-year marriage pushed him into rock bottom—and why writing became a lifeline. He also explains why ADHD and dyslexia can be both a superpower and kryptonite, and what it takes to build resilience without staying trapped in failure as a "comfort blanket." In this episode, we cover: * What it feels like to get an ADHD diagnosis later in life (and why it mattered more to others than to John) * School trauma, humiliation, and why criticism can trigger rage in ADHD/dyslexic adults * Anger as armor: shame, rejection sensitivity, and emotional overflow * The "fast brain" experience: overload vs "attention deficit" * Why ADHD people can be scattered and intensely focused (hyperfocus) * The Hawaii customs story: literacy shame, humiliation, and consequences * Reframing neurodivergence: "we don't need fixing—we need understanding and tools" * What the education system should change (and John's plan for an ADHD/dyslexia empowerment course) * Imposter syndrome and "fake it till you make it" as a practical survival tool * Tools John uses to regulate: meditation, gym, sauna, grounding, and presence practices * Where to find the book and John's work Connect with John O'Shea: * Website / book: https://neurospicy.life [https://neurospicy.life] * Discount code: ABC25

Conscious Living for Overwhelmed Young Adults: Alignment, Mentorship, Boundaries, and Nervous System Tools (with Samantha Kane, Roots Wings Wellness)

Adulting can feel like chaos: bills, work pressure, relationships, identity, and the constant question—"What am I supposed to do with my life?" In this episode of Adulting With Autism, we talk with Samantha Kane, founder of Roots Wings Wellness and a Certified Holistic Life Coach (Conscious Guide). Samantha helps people build self-mastery by connecting to their higher selves through grounded, practical rituals—nervous system regulation, boundaries, journaling, and alignment practices that actually work in real life. Samantha shares why the first step for many young adults isn't a perfect plan—it's finding a mentor you trust. We also unpack what "alignment" really means, how to tell the difference between intuition vs anxiety, and what to do when you're stuck—whether you need movement, patience, or both. In this episode, we cover: * The first step when you feel lost: finding a mentor (without needing money) * What "alignment" is and how to recognize it (jobs, friendships, relationships) * Intuition vs anxiety: practical questions to check your "gut" * Outgrowing friends, boundaries, and why you don't get to keep every relationship * Adult priorities: spending vs bills, and choosing consequences on purpose * Purpose pressure in your 20s: why you don't need the "perfect job" immediately * Avoiding work identity burnout: managing energy and keeping life separate from work * Finding your true self after years of labels: journaling as self-observation * Feeling stuck: stagnant energy vs "meantime" waiting (and how to tell the difference) * Tools to regulate: grounding/nature, box breathing 4–4–4–44–4–4–44–4–4–4, creative breath visuals Connect with Samantha Kane: * Website: https://rootswingswellness.com [https://rootswingswellness.com] (free guide + free call available) * Instagram: @rootswingswellness

Hypnotherapy for Fight-or-Flight: Nervous System Regulation, Chronic Pain, and Consent-Based Healing (with Ethan Reisboard, CHT)

If you live in fight-or-flight—anxiety, hypervigilance, chronic stress, shutdown, or even chronic pain—your body isn't being "dramatic." It's protecting you. But healing is hard when your nervous system can't access safety. In this episode of Adulting With Autism, we talk with Ethan Reisboard, CHT, a hypnotherapist who helps clients regulate their nervous systems and create lasting change using evidence-informed hypnotherapy tools. Ethan shares his own recovery story: in 2021 he developed post-concussion syndrome with debilitating migraines and eye dysfunction. After trying numerous approaches with no results, hypnotherapy helped shift his body out of fight-or-flight so recovery could finally begin. Now he works with clients (mostly over Zoom) to build safety, reduce triggers, and develop skills that last beyond a single session. In this episode, we cover: * What hypnotherapy is (and what it is not) * Why the hypnotic state supports the parasympathetic nervous system * How fight-or-flight can show up as anxiety and chronic pain * How you know you're "out" of fight-or-flight: when triggers become less relevant/reactive * "I can't be hypnotized" — stage hypnosis vs therapeutic hypnosis * How to find a qualified hypnotherapist (training, supervision, credentials) * Tools Ethan uses with clients: breathwork (including vagus nerve activation), somatic tracking, guided practices * Working with neurodivergent clients: visualization differences, trust, sensory concerns * Nature and travel as nervous system support—without using external "escape" as the only strategy * Consent, safety, and agency: why hypnosis can't make you do what you don't want * How hypnotherapy can complement OT/PT/clinical rehab when progress is stuck Connect with Ethan Reisboard, CHT: * Website: https://ethanreishypnotherapy.com [https://ethanreishypnotherapy.com] * Social: Ethan Reis Hypnotherapy * Free consultation scheduling and resources available on his website

Life Reboot: Nerd Edition — Burnout Recovery, Boundaries, and Values-to-Action for Overwhelmed Techies (with Coach Loren Silverman)

Burnout doesn't always show up as a dramatic crash. Sometimes it's slow erosion: late nights, weak boundaries, snapping at people, losing hobbies, and waking up feeling like life is a chore. In this episode of Adulting With Autism, we talk with Loren Silverman, a former digital transformation leader turned coach and creator of Life Reboot: Nerd Edition—a 90-day coaching experience designed for nerds, geeks, tech professionals, and high performers who want clarity, better boundaries, and sustainable follow-through. Loren shares how a pivotal experience in 2022—supporting Ukrainian refugees in Poland after the invasion—helped him realize what mattered most: moving people forward. We break down his gamified coaching framework (think D&D stats, quests, XP, rerolls, and boss battles) and why consistency—not perfection—is what creates real change. In this episode, we cover: * Early warning signs of burnout in tech and high-demand careers * Why burnout is "insidious" and how boundaries erode over time * What "align your actions with your values" actually means (and how to find your values) * Beginner-friendly boundary script: "Let me think about that for a minute." * How to tolerate the guilt/discomfort of saying no and protecting your energy * Breaking overwhelming tasks into micro-steps (SMART stories / project management thinking) * All-or-nothing thinking and how to practice "good enough" without quitting * Tracking progress without turning it into another self-criticism tool (rerolls + XP) * Building support through "co-op challenges" and safe accountability Connect with Loren Silverman: * Website / strategy call: https://silverman.coach [https://silverman.coach] * Ask about: Life Reboot: Nerd Edition community, weekly mastermind, and "Lantern Fall Thursdays"