Lies My Ego Told Me

Ep. 20: If I Make Enough Money, I’ll Finally Be Safe, with Aamina Saddiqui

Lilo sits down with Aamina Siddiqui, a wealth manager who spent her life chasing financial security, only to discover that money was never the real source of safety. After enduring childhood instability, post-9/11 discrimination and her father’s repeated job losses, Aamina rose to the top of her industry. But even as she advised multi-millionaire clients on managing their wealth, her own relationship with money spiraled—and she had to fix it. This episode explores the psychological roots of our beliefs about money, the illusion that income equals security, and how true financial freedom begins internally, not externally. In this episode: Who is Aamina Saddiqi and why is her story important? Aamina Siddiqui is a financial advisor, wealth strategist and educator who specializes in helping people—especially women—develop a healthier relationship with money. Her story is important because she had financial expertise but still struggled with money, and her behaviors were driven by past trauma, not lack of knowledge. This is a common experience for many high achievers. Instead of chasing income as the solution, she rebuilt her financial foundation and separated self-worth from net worth. Her transformation shows that financial literacy without emotional literacy isn’t enough. What does this episode say about money and feeling safety, security or happiness? This episode makes several bold assertions to reframe the narrative around money and security. Aamina Saddiqi says money does not automatically create safety; money can buy comfort but not peace; security comes from systems, not status; and happiness is tied to “enough,” not “excess.”  What does this episode say about having a healthy relationship with money? This episode suggests that a healthy relationship with money starts with separating self-worth from net worth. People should start by trying to live below their means. Starting small—even saving just $10–$50 a month—can rewire your brain toward discipline and long-term thinking. Then, automate those good habits by creating systems that remove willpower from the equation. Resources & Links * Aamina Saddiqi on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/aaminasiddiqui/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/aaminasiddiqui/] Show: Lies My Ego Told Me * Episode page, resources, and links: liesmyego.com [https://liesmyego.com/] * Leave a 5-star rating and written review on Apple Podcasts to support the show. For more resources: liesmyego.com

Ep. 19: There is No Time for Fear, with Sharon “Betty” Preszler

Lilo sits down with trailblazing fighter pilot Sharon “Betty” Preszler, one of the first women to fly the F-16 after the 1993 combat exclusion law change. From ejecting out of an F-16 in a five-second life-or-death emergency, to working inside Cheyenne Mountain on 9/11 while six months pregnant, to navigating her young son’s leukemia diagnosis, Preszler shares the “lie” her ego told her for decades: There’s no time for fear. In this episode: What is this episode of Lies My Ego Told Me about? This episode of Lies My Ego Told Me explores the dynamic between courage and fear. The discussion reveals that courage does not mean the absence of fear; it means acting despite fear. The episode explains that fear is natural and often unavoidable but it does not have to dictate decisions. True courage is acknowledging fear and moving forward anyway. Who is Sharon Preszler and why is her story important? Sharon “Betty” Preszler is a history-making fighter pilot, one of the first women to fly an F-16 after the law was changed in 1993. Besides her military credentials and experience, she overcame personal challenges including her young son’s cancer diagnosis. Having stepped away from aviation to become a keynote speaker and life coach, she now helps others conquer their fear and move forward. What does this episode say about suppressing fear? This episode reveals that fear doesn’t disappear, it takes root and grows. Preszler says that while compartmentalizing helped her function in high-stakes roles, unprocessed stress eventually manifested physically. Healing only began when she stopped flying, reflected deeply, and allowed herself to revisit buried experiences. What does this episode say about having a healthy relationship with fear? This episode reveals that fear is neither enemy nor weakness—it’s information. It’s a survival response. The key is to recognize it, accept it without shame, evaluate whether it’s rational and choose a response intentionally. Resources & Links Learn more about Betty and her causes * Check out her Substack https://substack.com/@thebettypreszler [https://substack.com/@thebettypreszler] * For Coaching or Keynote Speaking https://sharonpreszler.com/ [https://sharonpreszler.com/] * To support families navigating childhood cancer, please support Camp KEMO https://prismahealthchildrens.org/programs-and-services/camps/camp-kemo [https://prismahealthchildrens.org/programs-and-services/camps/camp-kemo] For more information about Lies My Ego Told Me * Episode page, resources, and links: liesmyego.com [https://liesmyego.com/] * Leave a 5-star rating and written review on Apple Podcasts to support the show. For more resources: liesmyego.com

Ep. 18: Perfectionism is Excellence, with Dr. Anne Harrington

Lilo sits down with Dr. Anne Harrington, a leading nuclear policy scholar and trailblazer, to unpack the lie that perfectionism equals excellence. From global security systems that fail despite flawless execution to the intensely personal grief of infertility and motherhood, Anne shares how doing everything “right” still doesn’t guarantee the outcome we want. This conversation explores control, vulnerability, and what it means to be good enough—in our work, our bodies, our relationships, and our lives. In this episode: What is this episode of Lies My Ego Told Me about? This episode of Lies My Ego Told Me explores how perfectionism can masquerade as excellence—and the emotional cost of believing that doing everything right guarantees the right outcome. Through personal storytelling and systems-level insight, the episode connects global nuclear policy failures with deeply human experiences of grief, control, and motherhood. Who is Anne Harrington and why is her story significant? Anne Harrington is a professor of international relations and an expert on nuclear weapons and nonproliferation. Her story is significant because she bridges high-stakes global systems—where small failures can lead to catastrophe—with personal experiences of infertility, loss, and becoming a mother, revealing how limits of control exist in both policy and life. What does this episode say about infertility and loss? The episode reframes infertility and miscarriage as experiences that are not caused by personal failure. Anne emphasizes that no amount of effort, discipline, or “doing everything right” can guarantee biological outcomes—and that self-blame only deepens grief. What does “good enough” mean in this episode? “Good enough” means showing up with honesty, humility, and emotional presence rather than striving for flawlessness. Anne explains that children—and adults—don’t need perfect caregivers or perfect systems; they need relationships that allow for mistakes, repair, and resilience. Resources & Links * Show: Lies My Ego Told Me * Episode page, resources, and links: liesmyego.com [https://liesmyego.com/] * Leave a 5-star rating and written review on Apple Podcasts to support the show. For more resources: liesmyego.com

Ep. 17: I can Carry the Weight, with Theresa Claiborne

Season two of Lies My Ego Told Me takes off with aviation trailblazer Theresa “TC” Claiborne, the first Black woman to graduate from U.S. Air Force pilot training. She shares the lie that shaped her life: “I can carry the weight.” From being deliberately minimized at a historic milestone to proving herself again and again in the cockpit and beyond, Theresa opens up about invisibility, the quiet pressure of being “the first,” and why she now sees that weight as both burden and gift. In this episode: Who is Theresa “TC” Claiborne? Theresa “TC” Claiborne is an aviation pioneer who became the first Black woman to graduate from U.S. Air Force pilot training. She later flew for United Airlines for more than 34 years, retiring in May 2024 as a Boeing 787 Captain. What is Theresa Claiborne known for? She is known for breaking barriers in military aviation, serving as a KC-135 pilot in the Air Force and Reserves, and becoming a long-tenured United Airlines captain while advocating for representation, mentorship, and equity in aviation. Why wasn’t Theresa Claiborne’s graduation widely celebrated? Theresa describes how media interest was high, but decisions were made to limit coverage—minimizing her achievement despite its historic significance and impact. What advice does Theresa give to people carrying heavy responsibility? Theresa encourages people to keep moving forward, lean on community, and remember they don’t have to carry everything alone—while still honoring the reality that the burden is often placed unfairly. Resources & Links * Show: Lies My Ego Told Me * Episode page, resources, and links: liesmyego.com [https://liesmyego.com/] * Leave a 5-star rating and written review on Apple Podcasts to support the show. For more resources: liesmyego.com

Ep. 16: Never Leave Your Wingman Behind, with Nicole Malachowski

In the season finale of the now award-winning Lies My Ego Told Me, Lilo sits down with her longtime hero, Colonel (Ret.) Nicole “FiFi” Malachowski — the first woman to fly with the U.S. Air Force Thunderbirds. What begins as a story of breaking barriers in the F-15E Strike Eagle becomes a raw account of institutional betrayal, medical gaslighting, and the years Nicole spent fighting for an accurate diagnosis after tick-borne illness left her bedridden. This conversation explores how she turned that devastation into advocacy, becoming a powerful wingman for patients with chronic Lyme. More about this episode: Who is Nicole “FiFi” Malachowski? Nicole Malachowski is a retired U.S. Air Force Colonel, the first woman to fly with the Thunderbirds, a combat-proven F-15E Strike Eagle pilot, a former White House fellow, and a national advocate for tick-borne illness patients. What happened to Nicole after her tick bites? Nicole developed over 60 symptoms, experienced cognitive decline, paralysis, and periods resembling locked-in syndrome. Despite clear signs of Lyme disease, she was repeatedly dismissed by doctors and endured 24+ specialist visits before receiving a correct diagnosis. Why did Nicole feel abandoned by the Air Force and the medical system? Nicole was told her symptoms were psychosomatic, advised to “retire,” and left without support during two years bedridden. Her final years in uniform were marked by institutional gaslighting, a lack of follow-up, and a retirement handled without ceremony or acknowledgment. How did she turn her experience into advocacy? Nicole helped shape Air Force policy on complex medical conditions, became a keynote speaker, and co-authored a National Academies of Sciences report that officially recognizes Lyme infection–associated chronic illness. What can friends or colleagues do to support someone with chronic illness? Nicole emphasizes simple acts: consistent check-ins, listening without judgment, learning about the illness, helping the caregiver, and showing up without waiting to be asked. Resources & Links * NicoleMalachowski.com – Advocacy, speaking, and resources * LivLymeFoundation.org [https://livlymefoundation.org/] – Tick-borne illness support * LymeDisease.org – Research, education, and patient tools * Show: Lies My Ego Told Me * Episode page, resources, and links: liesmyego.com [https://liesmyego.com/] * Leave a 5-star rating and written review on Apple Podcasts to support the show. For more resources: liesmyego.com