Anxious Laughter

Right now, we were supposed to be about halfway through Season 2 of the podcast. But with lockdown, I've run out of new episodes, and it's not possible for me to keep recording them at the rate I'd need to in order to keep going. So things are going on hold for a little while...

In lockdown, I've got back into running six days a week.  But am I actually enjoying it?  Well no. I'm not. In this episode, I explore my relationship with running a bit, I think about how I used to run long distances, and how I once entered the ballot for a place in the London marathon and was relieved when I didn't get a place - but not for the reason you may think.

In this episode, I talk about getting out into nature for walks, and how nature has a soothing effect, even if it's nothing mystical or spiritual. And I talk about how bad I am at doing nothing.   How much I'd hate a beach holiday sitting by the sea, or by a pool. And about how threatening cows can be.

Recently was the date of the cancelled Eurovision Song Contest 2020.     But rather than late the date pass without ceremony, I set up a studio in my garage and hosted my own.  I sang a few songs, did all the video editing and pulled the show together.  I even presented it live and coped with the internet went down halfway through the broadcast. Only confident, charismatic people can do that sort of stuff, right? We are all contradictions, and we're all moulded and beaten into shape by the people and circumstances around us. In maybe the most raw and personal episode yet, I talk about being a contradiction, and what life may be life without anxiety.

In this episode, I have a conversation with Scott Bird, a personal trainer from London, on the subject of body confidence. It's easy to very personal trainers are people who've always been fit and sporty, and to think that they are comfortable and confident in their bodies. But in this episode I ask Scott what it was like being overweight as a teenager, and how he finds the gym environment as both a trainer and someone with body confidence issues. You can find Scott at https://birdpersonaltraining.com/ for information and to sign up to train with him! :-)