Money For Couples with Ramit Sethi

Kristen (30) and Josh (36) married just last year, but their honeymoon phase is buried under $40,000 of debt and a sense of being “trapped.” Kristen is meticulous, tracking every dollar and carrying deep guilt around spending—even on herself. Josh, meanwhile, shrugs off the stress with a “we’ll figure it out” attitude, though his impulse purchases and nicotine habit don’t help. With 82% of their income tied up in fixed costs, they’re left with almost nothing for fun, savings, or their dreams of a bigger space for pets and cars. Kristen is exhausted from budgeting every penny, while Josh wonders if more discipline is really the answer. Can Ramit help them break free from the cycle of guilt, fear, and deprivation—and finally learn how to enjoy life while paying off debt? In this episode we uncover: • Why Kristen describes her daily life as feeling “trapped” by debt and second-guessing over small purchases • How Josh’s role as the “ignorant reassurer” undermines their partnership • The moment Kristen admits she feels like the “manager” of their household finances, while Josh feels like an “employee” • Why 82% of their income goes to fixed costs • How Josh’s nicotine habit consumes nearly all of their guilt-free spending • Kristen’s pride in maintaining her cars and what it reveals about her resourcefulness • The trade-offs Kristen faced leaving a toxic job for lower pay • How Josh’s childhood poverty and lessons in “patience” continue to shape his money mindset today • Kristen’s upbringing in a family of secrecy and mixed financial messages • The deep guilt Kristen feels about spending and the quiet fear Josh carries that he’ll “never get ahead” • How Ramit challenges them to imagine freedom beyond budgeting and debt payoff Chapters: (00:00:00) “I feel trapped by $50” (00:19:44) Ramit breaks down their numbers (00:36:45) “Zero interest… but still stressed” (00:43:45) “We packed coolers instead of eating out” (00:51:54) “When money gets hard, I just work harder” (01:06:08) “I want a partner, not an employee” (01:13:31) Turning side hustles into new income (01:19:45) “What do we do with too much money?” (01:28:44) Choosing how to design their Rich Life (01:36:03) Where are they now? Kristen and Josh’s follow-ups This episode is brought to you by: SonderMind | Go to https://sondermind.com [https://sondermind.com/] to get matched with the right therapist in less than a week ZocDoc | Download the ZocDoc app for FREE at https://zocdoc.com/ramit [https://zocdoc.com/ramit] then find and book a top-rated doctor today #sponsored Factor | Get 50% off plus free shipping on your first box at https://factormeals.com/ramit50OFF [https://factormeals.com/ramit50off] with code RAMIT50OFF Shopify | Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at https://shopify.com/ramit [https://shopify.com/ramit] Facet | Facet is waiving their $250 enrollment fee for new annual members, and for my audience, Facet is offering $300 into your brokerage account if you invest and maintain $5,000 within your first 90 days. Head to https://facet.com/ramit [https://facet.com/ramit] to learn more about which membership option is best for you Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples [https://iwt.com/moneyforcouples] • Get Money Coaching with Ramit [https://iwt.com/moneycoaching] • Download the Conscious Spending Plan [https://iwt.com/csp] • Listen to my book—now on Audible [https://amzn.to/48zko28] • Get my New York Times best-selling book [https://amzn.to/3HGwbkK] • Get my no-numbers journal [https://amzn.to/3j6Tmuf] • Other episodes [https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/podcast/] • Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/moneyforcouples] • Twitter [https://twitter.com/ramit] • YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/user/ramitsethi/featured] If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here [https://iwt.com/apply].

Jason (38) and Katie (36) thought buying their dream home in Minnesota would be the start of a new chapter. Instead, they’re buried in debt, daycare bills, and the pressure of raising a new baby while working demanding creative jobs in an industry threatened by AI. Despite earning $246,000 a year, they’ve been trapped in a decade-long debt cycle, and every dollar is already spoken for. With $30,000 in debt left to go and no clear plan for what comes next, can they finally break free of survival mode and build the life they truly want together? In this episode we uncover: • How Jason and Katie’s “dream home” quickly became a financial trap • Why their money talks happen every single day—and why that constant communication leaves them exhausted • The pattern of paying off debt, only to fall right back into it • The hidden costs of homeownership • Jason’s obsession with “cashflow”—and why Ramit calls it a red flag that blinds them to the bigger picture • How Katie’s childhood lessons of “we can’t afford it” show up in her marriage today • Jason’s upbringing of scarcity and mixed money messages • The constant fear of job loss in an industry disrupted by AI • Why their meticulous tracking of every penny isn’t working • The moment Jason admits he’s “done” with the cycle Chapters: (00:00:00) “We talk about every transaction” (00:22:05) Ramit breaks down their numbers (00:36:18) When “cashflow” becomes a red flag (00:39:39) When “asking for permission” follows you into marriage (00:45:58) “We couldn’t afford the pool, but a new TV showed up” (00:56:23) “I’m repeating a cycle” (01:21:02) “You have more money than you realize” (01:26:33) Where are they now? Jason and Katie’s follow-ups This episode is brought to you by: Fabric by Gerber Life | Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to protect their family. Apply today in just minutes at https://meetfabric.com/ramit [https://meetfabric.com/ramit] DeleteMe | If you want to get your personal information removed from the web, go to https://joindeleteme.com/ramit [https://joindeleteme.com/ramit] for 20% off Leesa | Go to https://leesa.com [https://leesa.com/] for 25% off sitewide PLUS get an extra $50 off with promo code RAMIT, exclusive for my listeners LMNT | Right now, LMNT is offering 8 single serving packets FREE with any LMNT order. Get yours at https://drinklmnt.com/RAMIT [https://drinklmnt.com/RAMIT] Trust & Will | Protect what matters most in minutes at https://trustandwill.com/ramit [https://trustandwill.com/ramit] and get 10% off plus free shipping Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples [https://iwt.com/moneyforcouples] • Get Money Coaching with Ramit [https://iwt.com/moneycoaching] • Download the Conscious Spending Plan [https://iwt.com/csp] • Listen to my book—now on Audible [https://amzn.to/48zko28] • Get my New York Times best-selling book [https://amzn.to/3HGwbkK] • Get my no-numbers journal [https://amzn.to/3j6Tmuf] • Other episodes [https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/podcast/] • Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/moneyforcouples] • Twitter [https://twitter.com/ramit] • YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/user/ramitsethi/featured] If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here [https://iwt.com/apply].

Laura (34) and Cameron (38) earn over $200,000 a year and save thousands each month, yet every decision feels like a crisis. Laura, a first-generation Mexican American, grew up in financial chaos and now enforces strict rules, from tracking every purchase in YNAB to keeping Cameron on an allowance. Her dream is to hit Coast FIRE in five years. Cameron, meanwhile, just wants to enjoy life today—take a trip, fix the car, maybe even expand their family. Their daughter is four, and the question of whether to have another child looms large. Can Ramit help them break free from fear, build shared goals, and find a balance between saving for tomorrow and living fully now? A special thanks to DeleteMe for sponsoring this episode. If you want to get your personal information removed from the web, go to https://joindeleteme.com/ramit [https://joindeleteme.com/ramit] for 20% off. In this episode we uncover: • Why Laura enforces strict financial rules yet still feels unsafe despite saving half their income • How Cameron’s “passenger” role with money leaves Laura carrying the weight • Why their $228,000 household income doesn’t feel like “enough” in an affluent Chicago neighborhood • How childhood experiences shaped Laura’s scarcity mindset • The emotional toll of living as if they are still poor, even with nearly half a million dollars in net worth • How FIRE gave Laura a sense of control and safety—but at the cost of enjoying life today • How chasing control keeps them feeling perpetually “behind” and unable to thrive • The stark contrast between Laura’s authoritarian role and Cameron’s passivity • How they can move beyond survival mode and start thriving by defining a shared Rich Life vision Chapters: (00:00:00) “I keep my husband on an allowance” (00:09:58) Ramit breaks down their numbers (00:25:05) “We feel poor… on $228,000 a year” (00:41:37) “My parents racked up debt in my name without me knowing” (00:54:48) “I keep us living small” (01:10:21) “CoastFi says we’re fine—so why doesn’t it feel real?” (01:24:06) “What would make the next 10 years magical?” (01:33:54) Where are they now? Laura and Cameron’s follow-ups This episode is brought to you by: Wildgrain | Get $30 off the first box - PLUS free Croissants in every box at https://wildgrain.com/ramit [https://wildgrain.com/ramit] ZocDoc | Download the ZocDoc app for FREE at https://zocdoc.com/ramit [https://zocdoc.com/ramit] then find and book a top-rated doctor today #sponsored SonderMind | Go to https://sondermind.com [https://www.sondermind.com/?utm_source=ramit_sethi&utm_medium=youtube&utm_campaign=september&utm_content=general] to get matched with the right therapist in less than a week Facet | Facet is waiving their $250 enrollment fee for new annual members, and for my audience, Facet is offering $300 into your brokerage account if you invest and maintain $5,000 within your first 90 days. Head to https://facet.com/ramit [https://facet.com/ramit] to learn more about which membership option is best for you Links mentioned in this episode • Get tickets for my next live event—September 26 in Los Angeles—at iwt.com/events [https://iwt.com/events] Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples [https://iwt.com/moneyforcouples] • Get Money Coaching with Ramit [https://iwt.com/moneycoaching] • Download the Conscious Spending Plan [https://iwt.com/csp] • Listen to my book—now on Audible [https://amzn.to/48zko28] • Get my New York Times best-selling book [https://amzn.to/3HGwbkK] • Get my no-numbers journal [https://amzn.to/3j6Tmuf] • Other episodes [https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/podcast/] • Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/moneyforcouples] • Twitter [https://twitter.com/ramit] • YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/user/ramitsethi/featured] If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here [https://iwt.com/apply].

Lashan (50) and David (49) have been married for nearly two decades, raising three children and building stable government careers. But when health complications and a sudden return-to-office mandate pressured Lashan into early retirement, their income dropped. Suddenly, $5,000 a month seems to vanish into thin air. Lashan, meticulous and controlling with money, carries the full weight of their financial future, while David remains passive and supportive from the sidelines. But the stakes are high: a mortgage, looming college costs, and the urgency to create meaningful memories while Lashan still can. Can Ramit help them uncover where the money is going, build a roadmap for the future, and finally get David to step up as a true financial partner? In this episode we uncover: • Why Lashan was pressured into early retirement • How $5,000 a month in “guilt-free spending” keeps disappearing • How David’s childhood scarcity shaped his urge to spend money now • Evictions and shut-off notices from Lashan’s childhood have driven her obsession with control and bill paying • Why David earned the “ignorant reassurer” label • How compartmentalizing her terminal diagnosis keeps Lashan focused on bills instead of her deepest fears • Ramit’s challenge to flip their money roles • The invisible financial work Lashan handles that David barely sees • Why paying bills feels like love and safety for Lashan • How Lashan ended up caring for everyone else but not herself Chapters: (00:00:00) “I’ve cried more about leaving my job than my diagnosis” (00:19:25) Ramit breaks down their numbers (00:38:02) “Eviction notices… the electricity might be off” (00:46:32) “I’m going to die… and I can’t do this all alone” (01:10:44) Redefining what family memories look like (01:20:28) Paying off debt isn’t enough—planning for life after (01:28:23) “I feel like I see the possibility for joy and fun” (01:36:01) Where are they now? Lashan and David’s follow-ups This episode is brought to you by: LMNT | Right now, LMNT is offering 8 single serving packets FREE with any LMNT order. Get yours at https://drinklmnt.com/RAMIT [https://drinklmnt.com/RAMIT]. Gelt | Book a tax consultation with Gelt at https://joingelt.com/ramit [https://joingelt.com/ramit]. As a member of my community, you can skip the waitlist. Netsuite | Download the CFO's Guide to AI and Machine Learning at https://netsuite.com/ramit [https://netsuite.com/ramit]. Fabric by Gerber Life | Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to protect their family. Apply today in just minutes at https://meetfabric.com/ramit [https://meetfabric.com/ramit]. DeleteMe | If you want to get your personal information removed from the web, go to https://joindeleteme.com/ramit [https://joindeleteme.com/ramit] for 20% off. Links mentioned in this episode • Get tickets for my next live events—September 14 in Atlanta and September 26 in Los Angeles—at iwt.com/events [https://iwt.com/events] Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples [https://iwt.com/moneyforcouples] • Get Money Coaching with Ramit [https://iwt.com/moneycoaching] • Download the Conscious Spending Plan [https://iwt.com/csp] • Listen to my book—now on Audible [https://amzn.to/48zko28] • Get my New York Times best-selling book [https://amzn.to/3HGwbkK] • Get my no-numbers journal [https://amzn.to/3j6Tmuf] • Other episodes [https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/podcast/] • Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/moneyforcouples] • Twitter [https://twitter.com/ramit] • YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/user/ramitsethi/featured] If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here [https://iwt.com/apply].

Rachel (31) and Pierre (42) have been together for four years, building a loving and stable life in Brooklyn. But one issue is holding everything back: Pierre’s $60,000 in debt from a failed business he started to support his family. His plan is to wait it out, hoping the problem disappears. But Rachel is unwilling to move forward towards marriage until there’s a plan in place. To her, his passive approach feels like a warning sign for their future together. Can Ramit help them face the reality of this debt, make a plan, and build a shared vision? In this episode we uncover: • Why Rachel vowed never to date someone with debt—and why she chose to date Pierre anyway • Pierre’s family vape shop business collapse and the $60,000 in debt he took on to try to save it • The stark difference in how each partner views the debt • Why Pierre believes ignoring the judgment is a valid strategy • Rachel’s habit of minimizing her own fears • How Pierre’s family history shaped his own sense of obligation • Rachel’s painful history with her mother being scammed out of $60,000 • The tension between investing for the future versus paying off past mistakes • How cultural expectations and family loyalty complicate Pierre’s decision-making around money • The breaking point: Rachel admits she cannot say yes to a proposal without a clear plan for the debt • Ramit’s game plan to get the debt paid off—the right way Chapters: (00:00:00) “If you don’t handle this debt, I won’t marry you” (00:19:50) Ramit breaks down their numbers (00:27:25) “Happy wife, happy life” — but what about the debt? (00:41:53) He took on debt for his family — but at what cost to his future? (00:55:01) “I don’t ask my dad for money… and I don’t ask Pierre either” (01:07:31) How small sacrifices can open the door to big changes (01:23:21) Logistics are a big turn on (01:30:50) Where are they now? Rachel and Pierre’s follow-ups This episode is brought to you by: SonderMind | Go to https://sondermind.com [https://www.sondermind.com/?utm_source=ramit_sethi&utm_medium=youtube&utm_campaign=september&utm_content=general] to get matched with the right therapist in less than a week. Doola | Go to https://doola.com/ramit [https://doola.com/ramit/] and use code RAMIT for 10% off LLC formation and bookkeeping. Masterclass | For unlimited access to every class and 15% off an annual membership, go to https://masterclass.com/ramit [https://masterclass.com/ramit] Rocket Money | Cancel unwanted subscriptions and manage your expenses the easy way at https://rocketmoney.com/ramit [https://rocketmoney.com/ramit] Notion | Try Notion for free at https://notion.com/ramit [https://notion.com/ramit] and experience the powerful, easy-to-use Notion AI today. Links mentioned in this episode • Get tickets for my next live events—September 14 in Atlanta and September 26 in Los Angeles—at https://iwt.com/events [https://iwt.com/events] Connect with Ramit • Get my new book, Money For Couples [https://iwt.com/moneyforcouples] • Get Money Coaching with Ramit [https://iwt.com/moneycoaching] • Download the Conscious Spending Plan [https://iwt.com/csp] • Listen to my book—now on Audible [https://amzn.to/48zko28] • Get my New York Times best-selling book [https://amzn.to/3HGwbkK] • Get my no-numbers journal [https://amzn.to/3j6Tmuf] • Other episodes [https://www.iwillteachyoutoberich.com/podcast/] • Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/moneyforcouples] • Twitter [https://twitter.com/ramit] • YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/user/ramitsethi/featured] If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here [https://iwt.com/apply].